Girlfriend/Boyfriend: How to Calm the Nerves without Drinking to Excess

By William O'Donohue

Have you ever felt nervous talking to that special someone, not knowing what to say or do? Have you ever used alcohol to help you relax and feel less self-conscious around someone you are attracted to?

If this sounds familiar, then you can benefit from this fun, interactive book. Learn easy-to-use skills that help you overcome your nerves when dealing with someone of the opposite sex, skills that decrease your fear of rejection, improve your confidence around the opposite sex, and help you avoid dangerous drinking. The authors are experts in psychology and based the material on scientific research.

• Language: English
• Publisher: William O'Donohue
• Release date: Oct 28, 2014
• ISBN: 9781311926968

William O'Donohue

William O'Donohue is the Nicholas Cummings Professor of Organized Behavioral Healthcare at the University of Nevada, Reno. He is also an Adjunct Professor of Psychiatry and Philosophy. He has authored over 100 articles and chapters and co-edited more than 15 books.

Book preview

Girlfriend/Boyfriend: How to Calm the Nerves without Drinking to Excess

Joshua Medjuck, Ph.D.

William O’Donohue, Ph.D.

Have you ever felt nervous talking to that special someone, not knowing what to say or do? Have you ever used alcohol to help you relax and feel less self-conscious around someone you are attracted to?

If this sounds familiar, then you can benefit from this fun, interactive book. Learn easy-to-use skills that help you overcome your nerves when dealing with someone of the opposite sex, skills that decrease your fear of rejection, improve your confidence around the opposite sex, and help you avoid dangerous drinking. The authors are experts in psychology and based the material on scientific research.

A Lucky Bat Book

Girlfriend/Boyfriend: How to Calm the Nerves without Drinking to Excess

Copyright 2014 by Joshua Medjuck, Ph.D.

and

William T. O’Donohue, Ph.D.

All rights reserved

Cover Design:

Brandon Swann

Published by Lucky Bat Books

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

License Notes

This e-book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This e-book may not be resold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with other people, please purchase additional copies. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please buy your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Disclaimer

The ideas, suggestions, and procedures in the book are not intended to be a substitute for consulting with a mental health professional or your physician. All matters regarding your health require medical or mental health supervision.

Contents

Foreword: Evidence that this Book Works

Preface: How to Use this Brief Book

Introduction

Chapter 1: Anxiety is a Normal Part of Everyday Life

Chapter 2: Understanding How Your Thoughts Influence Your Feelings and Behavior

Chapter 3: Face Your Fears! The Key to Overcoming Anxiety

Chapter 4: The Surprising Facts and Not So Surprising Myths about Alcohol

Chapter 5: Sit Back and Relax—Strategies for Reducing Anxiety Through Relaxation

Chapter 6: People Skills

Conclusion

About the Authors

Foreword: Evidence that this Book Works

Self-help books have the ability to communicate knowledge in an accessible, effective, inspiring, and fun way. That’s the way we chose to make this one, although you will ultimately be the judge of this. We are both clinical psychologists working in a college environment. When we first thought of the idea, the goal of this self-help book was to reduce dating anxiety and problematic alcohol use in high school and undergraduate college students. We hypothesized that one pathway to increased alcohol use in this population is through heterosexual social anxiety, or heterosocial anxiety—a subset of social anxiety caused by interactions with potential romantic partners of the opposite sex. The book was designed to reduce heterosocial anxiety, promote improved social skills, and reduce excessive drinking in college students using cognitive-behavioral techniques that are based on scientific research. In order to test our hypotheses, we compared two groups of college students who met standardized criteria for binge alcohol use and elevated dating anxiety. The experimental group was provided with the self-help book and asked to read this book over the course of one month. In contrast, the control group was not provided with this self-help book but asked to monitor their personal relationships for one month (what is known as a no treatment control condition). Both groups completed measures pertaining to alcohol use and heterosocial anxiety at the immediate start of the experiment and after the one month period. The results were very encouraging.

Our first analysis compared the experimental and control group on outcome measures prior to the one month treatment period to ensure no significant group differences were present. The results showed no initial significant differences between the experimental and control groups on any of the measures used. This was good news: our groups started out the same. Our second analysis compared the scores of the experimental and control group before and after the one month period to determine if any significant changes occurred. The results demonstrated a statistically significant reduction in total alcohol use and dating anxiety for the experimental group in addition to a significant increase in heterosocial skills. However, the control group did not show statistically significant improvements in any of these domains. Thus, the positive changes seen in the experimental group were not due to things like spontaneous remission or maturation. Furthermore, our prediction that general social anxiety may be less correlated with alcohol use than the more specific problem of heterosocial anxiety was also supported by our results. The experimental group did not show a significant difference in scores of social anxiety after using the self-help book whereas heterosocial anxiety decreased along with total alcohol use. At least 90% of participants who read the self-help book reported some level of agreement that the strategies in the book were useful to them, the content of the book helped them to reduce their dating anxiety, and recommended the book to friends. Overall, we want our book to contribute to the healthy development of young adults and believe it can be an important healthcare tool