TILTing in 2010: Things I Love Thursday

By Ruth Sespaniak

What the heck is "Things I Love Thursday"?

With all the negativity in the world, it's easy to lose track of the good stuff at times. Actively focusing on the positive in life is always good to do. That's why Ruth Sespaniak began her weekly practice of reflecting on the things that bring extra joy and happiness into her life.

When Ruth thinks about TILTing, she's reminded of Callahan's Law from Spider Robinson's "Callahan's Crosstime Saloon" stories - "Shared pain is lessened, shared joy is increased." TILTing is just one way of putting that idea into action.

So here are some of the things Ruth loves, as compiled by her loving husband into book form. Reading Ruth's TILTs will help you start thinking about the things you love on a regular basis.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Ray Charbonneau
• Release date: Apr 28, 2011
• ISBN: 9781476288109

Book preview

Introduction

So what the heck is Things I Love Thursday or TILT? The short version is it’s a weekly practice of reflecting on the things that bring some extra joy and happiness into your life. Some weeks it’s very easy to find things to write about, other weeks it’s much tougher. Actively focusing on the positive things in life is always a good thing to do. There’s so much negativity in the world that it’s easy to lose track of the good stuff at times.

I can’t claim credit for Things I Love Thursday. It was just one of those things I saw on Facebook that caught my attention. An internet search shows the practice is pretty widespread but I couldn’t track down where it started. If someone knows who to give credit to for this idea, let me know. I owe them my gratitude.

My friend Gretchen was the first TILTer I encountered. She had picked up the habit from a friend of hers. Gretchen has a wonderful way with words and the next thing I knew I was hooked. I started looking forward to her weekly missives. Even when she had a crappy week (and she’s had some pretty crappy weeks), she would still find something she loved to write about. There was something cathartic about seeing her actively looking for the good in her life.

From there it wasn’t a big leap to thinking this might be something good for me to do. I started slowly by spending some time every Thursday looking back over my week and TILTing in my head. I kept meaning to actually write down my thoughts and post them to Facebook but it took me a little while to work up the courage. TILTs are personal by nature and the thought of sharing them was a little intimidating to me initially. Then Jackie took the plunge and started TILTing, also inspired by Gretchen. This moved me a little closer to actually publicly TILTing but not quite close enough.

The event that pushed me over the edge was the unexpected death of Gretchen’s husband Ben. When something like this happens, the frailty of life smacks you in the face. Suddenly it seemed more of a risk not to share the things I loved with my friends and family then it was to put them out there. So I wrote my first TILT in honor of Ben and I haven’t looked back since.

I frequently jot ideas down during the week, if I notice something especially TILT-worthy. So it’s become a normal part of my life instead of something I just do on Thursdays.

For me, the fascinating thing has been to see the reactions to my TILTs. I’m often surprised by what resonates with a particular person or multiple people. I’ve found out things about the people in my life that I had never known because something I mentioned in a TILT sparked a memory from them.

A number of folks have mentioned to me that they look forward to reading my TILT each week. Other friends and family have picked up the TILTing bug, so I have several TILTs I look forward to reading myself.

When I think about TILTing, I often find myself reminded of Callahan’s Law from Spider Robinson’s Callahan’s Crosstime Saloon stories – Shared pain is lessened, shared joy is increased. I think he was definitely on to something there. TILTing is just one way of putting that idea into action.

So here are some of the things I love, as compiled by my loving husband into book form. I hope they get you thinking of the things you love on a regular basis. It’s your choice whether or not to share those thoughts, but I highly recommend it.

TILTing in Honor of Ben

Thursday, March 18, 2010

A while back, a friend of my friend Gretchen started a weekly tradition called Things I Love Thursday or TILT. Gretchen picked it up and then other friends followed suit. The purpose is to find time every week to reflect on the things that occurred that week that you loved. Some weeks it’s easy to find things to write about, other weeks not so easy. Up until this point, I’ve been watching from the sidelines and doing my TILT in my head. Gretchen unexpectedly lost her husband Ben last week and that’s naturally caused some reflection on my own life. So in honor of Ben, I’m starting my TILTing this week.

Obviously, family and friends have been foremost in my mind. The outpouring of support for Gretchen on Facebook this week has been impressive. To quote from the Wizard of Oz – A heart is not judged by how well you love but by how well you are loved by others. Gretchen is clearly extremely well loved and I know that is helping her in this difficult time. Even more hugs at you Gretchen!

I love that my husband remembers and wants to celebrate the anniversary of our first date. He’s much better at remembering things like that. Fortunately, our first date was on St. Patrick’s Day four years ago. Having an anniversary associated with a pseudo-holiday really helps out the more date-memory impaired person in our twosome. For the record, our wedding anniversary is embedded in my brain as the last Saturday in September.

I love that I’ve been able to connect with my brother, nieces, in-laws and cousins of various degrees on Facebook. My family is spread out all over the place and it’s nice to be able to share part of their world virtually. I still have to work on my mom and my sister but sometimes these things take time. (And in the case of my mother, high-speed internet access.)

I get a special kick out of logging onto Facebook and seeing Barbara Grandberg likes this on my postings. Barbara is a great lady from our running club who runs the Boston Marathon every year for the Liver Foundation. She’s not at the front of the pack but despite her own health issues, she hangs in there and raises money to help others. She is a great inspiration to me as I train for my first marathon. So for Barbara – Go Liver!!

I was very surprised this week to see that two of my friends had friended each other. I know Judy from when our families lived in Nigeria in the early 70’s and only recently reconnected with her and her family via Facebook. I know Neal from work although he's on site in San Diego these days. They met at a church conference in the mid 70s. Sometimes the world is a very small place.

So that’s my first attempt at public TILTing. It appears to be somewhat contagious. So if you feel the need to count your blessings, jump in and TILT away.

It's the Simple Things that TILT My World

Thursday, March 25, 2010

OK, it's Things I Love Thursday. First the refresher on the purpose of the TILT. Once a week (Thursday) you look back and reflect on the things that happened that brought joy into your life. Sometimes it's easy to find things to write about and other times, not so much so. So far, I'm on a roll.

I love being able to get around without always hopping in the car. Saturday Ray and I took advantage of the sunny weather and headed off into town in search of crab. So we hopped the T to Park Station then walked over to the Barking Crab on the waterfront. Yup, it's kind of a touristy place but they have a selection of crab. The waiters talked us out of trying the Jonah crab (supposedly lots of work and not so much meat); we went for the dungeoness and snow crabs instead. They seat you family style here and we ended up talking sports and politics with the folks seated next to us who were in town on business. Hey, it's Boston; you have to talk sports and politics. And it was fun to get the outsider's perspective on life here in Boston.

I've decided I can justify desserts if I have to expend calories to get to them. So we walked over to the North End to our favorite little bakery. (Nope, not Mike's). This was the second time in a row we've gone there and they have been out of Black & White cookies. However, the smores brownie was a real good substitute.

Sunday was Long Run Day and I conveniently picked the cooler of the weekend days for my run. (Trust me, cooler is better than warmer when it comes to running long distance.) I always consider it a good sign when I run into folks I know during my runs and Craig was conveniently biking to meet up with friends for breakfast as I was headed out. So I stopped and chatted with him for a couple of minutes and had a little extra lift in my step after I continued on my way.

I finally managed to meet up with my friend Heidi for dinner. She's not on Facebook and doesn't email all that much, so I have to actually meet up with her in person to find out what's going on with her. This turns out to be a lengthy process that starts with picking a night to meet up after work and then rescheduling as one or both of us end up with last minute conflict. It only took us 2 tries this time which