For The Love of Pete!: Thoughts on Being Politically Incorrect Correctly

By Cliff Wilson

Many books attempt to focus on topics such as politics, economics, history, money, dieting, etc. The issue with such books is that their topics are trivial and narrow in focus.

Unlike most books, this book addresses topics that, quite frankly, have the ability to bring about world peace. Examples of such profound literary articulation include:

• Not Everyone Deserves a Trophy
• “Germaphobia”
• Air Travel Fashion
• Reality Shows
• Etc.

Over time, it might actually be argued that the impact of this book rivals the impact of the Magna Carta.

When one finishes this book, chances are they will have a different and fresh perspective on life. They will definitely have the basic building blocks needed to be politically incorrect correctly.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: May 1, 2013
• ISBN: 9781626754782

Book preview

Closing

Introduction:

My name is Cliff Wilson. I’m 47 years old. I do not have an English degree, nor do I claim to have a masterful knowledge of the English language. My most significant written accomplishments, to date, include elementary school book reports, the occasional mandatory college term paper and the business proposals that I develop from time to time in an effort to retain employment.

I can’t say that I’m overly concerned with how many people ultimately read these random thoughts and candidly truthful observations. Rather, I view this endeavor to be a type of therapy that allows me to purge the enormous amounts of frustration that I suppress day in, day out, as I continue to rub elbows with many who, quite frankly, are lucky to walk upright and breathe air. Perhaps, I am simply one of the silent majority that is becoming not so silent.

This undertaking will not in any way, shape or form, be political in its view, unless it is aimed at the entire political system. It will not take aim at any race, nationality, religion or gender. This book is intended to transcend all such trivial aspects of life and bring us together as a voice that is weary of forced endurance of all that is, quite frankly, just wrong. Things that everyone knows to be wrong, but that no one addresses.

My intentions are to abstain from most profanity, at least profanity that is viewed to be crude, vulgar or harsh. However, the words Damn, Shit and Ass will be used when believed to help accentuate a point. Examples might include, What a Dumbass, Damn It or Get that Shit Out of Here. Other than this, I hope to create something that is safe for the whole family.

With all of this being said, it is now time to proceed with my therapy.

Not Everyone Deserves a Trophy

My children are 18 and 15 and I have a basement full of trophies. Baseball, softball, football, swimming, basketball, soccer, you name it. We have multiples of each. I could possibly start my own trophy store, on the side, if I were to change out the name plates on the trophies that we’ve accumulated and resell them. If we kept all the ribbons that have been won, I’d have to add on to the house just to store them. Of all the trophies and ribbons that have been accumulated at the Wilson house, there are only two that, at this point, will ever really mean anything to the kids. My daughter received a trophy after maintaining a certain level of competency playing the piano for a period of time that spanned three years. My son received a football trophy when his team finished second in the state playoffs.

Most trophies are given out today much like adults give candy out at Halloween. Next Halloween, watch the kids stick out their hands and expect candy. These little I feel that I’m entitled ghouls and goblins get a trick when I’m on the porch. For years, I’ve told these unappreciative little monsters, that no one gets anything free in life, especially at my house. If they want candy from me, they have to give me words of advice to live by. Most of them look at me as if I’m temporarily halting a candy collecting frenzy that would rival a good old fashioned locust plague of Biblical proportions. Once they realize the old man on the porch is not kidding, you typically get some pretty good material that makes the evening worthy of the different tact taken with the kids. You get a lot of Eat your vegetables, Mind your parents, etc. Every now and then you pick up a few gems. For example, one kid once told me Don’t cheat on your wife. I dumped the whole bucket of candy into his pillowcase and told the collection of kids around him to listen to him for he was wise beyond his years. One kid ran up the driveway screaming to his mom We had to take a test at this house. I do want to be clear that the advice requirement doesn’t apply to the tiny ones. I genuinely enjoy seeing them all dressed up, trying to cover at least four houses (or a distance of 50 yards, whichever comes first) and figure out a custom that is entirely unknown to them. I digress, but not much. It all ties back to not everyone deserves a trophy. No one should ever feel entitled.

Getting back to trophies, next time you are at an end of season banquet, make it a point to watch the kids’ facial expressions when they receive the trophy or ribbon. I’ve seen more enthusiastic facial expressions on mug shots and/or cadavers. More often than not, when the so called athlete comes to accept their trophy from their coach, they have a smug look of I’m bored and/or I’m constipated. There is no expression of I’m proud or I worked hard for this. This repetitive, predictable demeanor pisses me off. Do me and society a favor. Reduce the sports/activity enrollment fee by $20 and forego the trophy unless a team finishes in the top three. That’s the approach in the Olympics. Perhaps, such an old fashioned, politically incorrect paradigm shift, in the way trophies are awarded, would produce a different facial expression/attitude when Johnny or Suzie athlete actually receives an award at a banquet.

When did Everyone deserves a trophy become the accepted standard? Aren’t you supposed to earn a trophy? Earning a trophy takes practice, focus, determination, sacrifice and time. In life, you get rewarded for performance. You don’t get rewarded for simply showing