Love in 90 Days:: The Essential Guide to Finding Your Own True Love

Written by Diana Kirschner

Narrated by Diana Kirschner

Diana Kirschner, Ph.D., knows the questions single women everywhere face: "Why am I attracted to the wrong kind of guys?" "Why is he just not that into me?" "Why can't I seem to find the One?" In LOVE IN 90 DAYS, Dr. Diana reveals the secrets to finding Mr. Right and the crucial steps single women can take to create fulfilling love that lasts.

Most singles unconsciously make the same mistakes over and over again in love, regardless of age, work success, or the type of man they are dating. Using her unique four-pronged approach, Dr. Diana pulls no punches. She outlines a program that gets women on the path to smash through their self-sabotage and forge a healthy love relationship.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Ascent Audio
• Release date: Jan 16, 2009
• ISBN: 9781596593336

Diana Kirschner

Diana Kirschner, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist who has more than 25 years of professional and practical experience doing therapy and workshops for singles and writing relationship articles for women. Dr. Diana appears regularly on The Today show, has been a guest on Oprah and many other national television and radio programs. Her previous books include Love in 90 Days and Sealing the Deal. She has been happily married for over 25 years.

Reviews for Love in 90 Days:

[missmermaid118 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Take my advice -- don't go out there looking for love without reading Diana Kirschner's LOVE IN 90 DAYS. This book is more than sentimental, seasonal fluff -- a LOT more! I had expected a rehash of the usual advice for finding a partner. You know, join clubs, volunteer, be open to dating your next-door neighbor's third cousin's son, get a dog. I was surprised to find that though Kirschner has a fun and accessible writing style, she takes her subject very seriously.In fact, you should be prepared to take a good hard look at yourself as early on there's a discussion of deadly dating patterns. Kirschner explains 13 patterns and helps you to identify which ones you might be stuck in. Readers are asked to do a lot of self-assessment throughout this entire book, but particularly in the first few sections. Of course, most self-help books have sections of writing exercises at the end of each chapter, and this one is no exception. But it certainly makes sense to figure out exactly what you're looking for in a partner and why you haven't been able to find the right guy so far.Did I say "find the right guy"? Kirschner has aimed LOVE IN 90 DAYS specifically at women, and she covers situations from a female perspective. I think guys could certainly benefit from some of the advice in this book, but with terminology such as the Dud/Stud Test, they might be more comfortable looking elsewhere. Kirschner does point out that to be a worthy contender, a guy should have some aptitude for self-reflection and personal growth.One of my favorite ideas proposed in LOVE IN 90 DAYS is Kirschner's advice to date three guys at once early in the program. At first the concept sounds a bit tawdry, but the emphasis here is on dating, not a physical relationship. Part of Kirschner's reasoning here is to keep women from falling too hard too fast and becoming caught up in a "singular focus." By dating three guys at once, you can allow yourself the opportunity to really compare and contrast - and that will help you determine what attributes are most important to you in a partner. Another thing I liked about this book is Kirschner's style of writing. Reading along, I had the sense of being advised by an older and wiser sister or cousin. While there are clinical and academic references at the back of the book, the text reads like a friendly chat. And that's nice, especially when "Dr. Diana" suggests online dating! Don't worry, she'll guide you through it every step of the way from picking a site to picking a partner.I liked LOVE IN 90 DAYS a lot. Any lady out there who is looking for love should take the time to check out this book -- and follow the advice!

[marywysong · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

This is one of those so-so books that doesn't really add anything new to current romance advice--There are tons of books out there on the same topic and some are far better. That said, it does offer helpful ideas and it's not really offensive. It's just there among the other books. I'm not really looking for anything permanent or "true" love, but I was looking to meet new potential boyfriends so I could date around and get some ideas as to what I want at this point in my life. I had no interest in men for several years after separating from an abusive ex-husband, but I decided that this would be the year I'd get out and really date again. And that's really the most essential message of this book--you have to WANT to get out there and try. Kirschner's tips advocate a very proactive attitude to finding love rather than a laid back, "wait and see" attitude.So with my own goals in mind, I tried some of Kirschner's ideas. Apparently my new open mind and decision to meet someone this year helped. In the spring, I went to an event for a club in which I am a member, and at one point, realized that four men were sitting at a table with me, vying for my attention. True, it is a club dominated by men, but more importantly, it is a club in which I am extremely interested. You can't just go out and try to find a guy in a place that that doesn't reflect your values; you have to look in places that would attract the kind of man you want to meet. I had more dates this year than I've had in any year since high school and I enjoyed some exciting, but short term relationships. All because I simply decided that this was the year I was going to go out and date! I didn't find true love, and the idea of going husband shopping doesn't appeal to me, but I have no doubt that a similar attitude applied to those goals can be effective.So to finalize, Kirschner offers good ideas that can work; however, there are many other similar books on the market and some of the others are better.

[amaryann21 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

This book was way too basic and promises more than it can deliver. I think any book that "guarantees" love is setting itself up for failure, and this one fits right into the group.

[nqtbradybunch · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

This is an interesting book. If one is searching for marriage, then I might recommend it. However, the book presumes that much of what might be considered culturally acceptable SHOULD be (such as living together, sleeping together, etc.), and makes some of these items actual steps and goals on the way to accomplishing the ultimate goal: finding "love."One major flaw in the book: I didn't see the true definition of "it's gonna last a lifetime" spousal love anywhere in the book. True love isn't self-serving, but it seeks to love the other, realizing that sometimes that love will not be returned. HOWEVER, that being said, there is some VERY useful information in the book as well. Outlined is a plan designed to get wallflowers out in the crowds. Getting out of one's comfort zone is not optional, but mandatory. I am applying some of the principles to gaining more personal friendships with women (I am already married, but got the book to possibly share with a friend). There is a great part on recognizing dangerous dating patterns, and with a little thought, it is an easy transition to make for friendships. 4 stars for useful information, 1 star for expecting "inappropriate" behavior in relationships. And, Heaven help you if any of the men you are dating ever find your love project notebook.

[jenndiggy · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I receieved this book from a giveaway on a blog I follow. I was quite excited to have won this.I'm not the best when it comes to dating or relationships, and being single, never married and no date since 2001 might be a testimony to that fact.Obviously I haven't had 90 days since receiving this book to try out the things she recommends. In fact, I'm not sure I'm "on the market" yet for a few months, want to get a few things completed in my life first, so it may be a little while before I actually start putting some of these things into practice.I never thought of marketing myself, which is basically what this book recommends. I am already more aware of who is around me, what I'm wearng when I run just to the store, etc.This book also dispells the fears of online dating. I did join one major site a few years ago and didn't have any luck, including getting a notice saying that someone had contacted me they had kicked off the site and have no more contact with that man! Wow! What an intro to online dating! So after my month was up I decided to delete my account.I'm curious to see where I am in a year with my adventure!

[reshibec · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

I think jabberwockiness hit the nail on the head with regards to "Love in 90 Days." I also received the book as part of LT's Early Review and, try as I might, I cannot remember even requesting it. Clearly that is my (and my memory's) problem, not the author's nor LT's. That being said, I'm far from being a self-help / life guide book expert. I can't say anything about this book lured me in or turned me off more than any other book in its genre. The advice seemed appropriate but predictable. Join groups to meet people, become comfortable talking to men. All of that is fine, I'm just not sure of the need for another book detailing such suggestions, even if said suggestions are delivered in a comfortable tone as this author manages.On a specific note, I did notice the author specifically suggests taking more commonly male-populated classes (i.e. rock climbing). While I can understand her motives, I hope readers recognize the worth in taking classes they're interested in rather than feigning interest in something they're not.

[lsknightsr1 · Rating: 1 out of 5 stars]

As far as self-help books go, this one didn't have anything special in it. I wasn't impressed, and got bored with it after reading the first two chapters. Most of it was simple common sense and encouraging you to get out of your house and meet men. I read a lot of self-help books and this one, in this reader's opinion, stunk.

[jabberwockiness · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

I received Love in 90 Days through LT's Early Review batch, and I have to say, I don't exactly have any experience with self-help books, especially not in the romance genre, so this was fairly interesting. I admit to a bit of initial skepticism, but after reading it, I'm not sure what to make of it.This is very much a self-help book in the sense that it comes with a program that can be very much personally tailored to your needs and wants. From dating three men in order to find the "one"... to figuring out your deadly dating patterns, it seems to be a book rather for the single women in her 30s? 40s? who just can't figure out why she can't find her "own true love." It's an interesting concept. Frankly, I'm not sure if I buy it. However, the author is very personable - her voice speaks directly to you as if you were sitting in her office for an appointment. For what it is, it seems like a decent read if you're looking for advice. I'm not sure about the potential for true love, but hey, to each their own!

[smilingsally · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

This is a volume of information for single women. Adjustments are offered so that the reader can tailor the program to fit her needs to work alone, with a friend, or with a group. Using a journal to keep track of exercises and homework is suggested. A contract is offered along with other forms that may be filled out to organize the process.The author talks about her personal life with the trials and tribulations that she experienced. In addition, anecdotes from real people are included that illustrate techniques that work in finding love.The Program of Three makes good sense. Seeking a Love Mentor is one gift the reader can give herself, and the five-step process nicely guides that selection. Online dating services are listed with recommendations and discussed in detail. Concrete suggestions about fixing relationships add to the value of this book. It seems to include everything. Why, there's even sixteen Flirting Techniques listed! There are specific Love Secrets for these categories of ladies: African-American, a single parent, a college graduate, financially successful, and over forty-five.Heart breaks and break-ups are kicked about. Eight habits of Living Love considered. Included are a summary of eight steps to love, appendixes, notes, and a comprehensive index. Folks, this is a good one.