This past week, I sat down with Ms. Patricia, Juniper’s wonderful Spanish preschool teacher from Colombia. Ms. Patricia had such wonderful things to say about Juni, but I quickly cut her off and asked her for her brutal honesty, “What are things that Juniper needs to improve?”.She identified three things: Juniper is hesitant to try new thingsWhen she gets upset, she uses disrespectful language with her peersShe doesn't eat her vegetablesAfter getting the inside scoop from the teacher, I needed to measure Juniper’s progress on each point, because after all, that which is measured can be improved. What does she really think about tough challenges? What does she think is an appropriate response when someone is being disrespectful or hurts a friend? Does she understand why it’s important to eat our vegetables?And I can’t just ask her these questions outright. It’s not like I can just sit down and interrogate her and she’ll give me her honest answers.So to understand how Juniper thinks, I sought the advice of a former FBI special agent, Jack Schafer, who did an interview on the Jordan Harbinger podcast.Jack teaches us to use elicitation instead of interrogation to gather honest information. I use elicitation to understand what Juniper really thinks about sharing and what she does when people use disrespectful language. Here is what we learn on today's episode:Instead of interrogation, we can use elicitation to extract the truth from people without them knowing it“Fill in the blank” is a method in which we provide a wrong answer, allowing our target to correct us, thereby, giving us the truth“3rd party” is a method in which we ask our target what they think about a situation that another person is experiencing. Our target will likely project their truth onto the 3rd party.That which is measured can be improved. By understanding how your kids currently think, you can identify areas in which they need to improve.Thank you for joining me today on Dad Smarter Not Harder.I want your feedback, questions, anything really. I just want to talk to you and the best way to do it is by shooting me a tweet at @junloayza.If you found this episode of Dad Smarter Not Harder valuable, then I ask you to please pay-it-forward by forwarding this episode to one other parent. Your recommendation to another parent is the greatest compliment you can give me. Thank you very much.