Podcast #452
Confidence For Physical Intimacy
 










You're not alone in feeling insecure about how you engage and interact with others physically. But there's no reason to stay stuck in this avoidance of or minimization of physical intimacy. No matter your background with others or with yourself, you can learn how to safely and comfortably connect with yourself and others with confidence in a physical way. Get the full show notes at www.trishblackwell.com/452


In this episode of The Confidence Podcast we're talking about:


·       Physical intimacy blocks and how your lack of confidence might be hindering your overall confidence and connection with others



·       How to have more body confidence and self-intimacy so that your physical intimacy with others - both platonically and romantically improves



·       5 techniques to proactively improve your confidence in physical intimacy in your romantic relationship


 
REVIEW OF THE WEEK
 


Holly Sexton 5-Stars, Not only and…



This is the podcast for you if you need help in ANYTHING!



Not only is it faith-based, and for entrepreneurs, and for moms, and for anyone dealing with diet issues, Trish hits all topics! When I don't even think I need to listen to that episode, I still get something from it! 







 
WHAT'S BLOCKING YOUR INTIMACY?.
 


Past sexual trauma or abuse



Distrust of others



Body dysmorphia 



Identity misalignment 



Preferences (lots of physical touch or not) 



Blocked intimacy means that you might…



Avoid dating because you don't want to have to be physical



Sabotage relationships to hide yourself



Body shame yourself and heighten your self-critical voice to create physical change



Overdrink or use substances to help you not overthink



Minimize social situations where hugs or interaction make you uncomfortable



Stand with guarded and closed off body language 



Hinder the openness and deep intimacy of allowing yourself to be known by your spouse



Undereating or protocol to allow yourself to be worthy of receiving touch



Never get self-care like massages or pedicures


 
PHYSICAL INTIMACY WITH YOURSELF
 


Stretching



Hugging



Touching



Massaging



Allowing yourself to have self-care



Lotion



Skin care routine



Intimate understanding of food that feels good on the inside



Intimate conversations with yourself



Challenge: 



Write your future self a love note at night for the next day. 



Learn to be friends with yourself means learning to come from a place of love. 



Love is the most powerful emotion we can be in; it opens up our creativity, our confidence and our connection.



What you feel yourself with you have to continue using - fuel with love not self-criticism. Criticism and pressure is heavy and forced, love is light, airy, easy and exciting


 
PLATONIC AND FAMILIAL INTIMACY
 


Hugs, touch.



Family background.



Understanding your affection preferences



Communicating to others your preferences



-I'm not a hugger, I love hugs, come - sit closer, etc.  


 
ROMANTIC INTIMACY
 


Allowing someone to be with you fully, without numbing yourself or hiding anything, opens you to true connection and deep intimacy.



You have to decide to allow yourself to be known.



Physical intimacy isn't going to give you physical confidence if you don't already have it --- physical intimacy grounds your confidence and your hard wiring to connect deeply with another human being at your base level. 


 
Methods to improve your confidence in physical intimacy:
 


1.     Spend more intentional time naked by yourself



2.     Thank your body for how it looks and compliment it



3.     Practice proactively escorting out negative thoughts - unwanted guests for when your mind wanders - refuse to allow your intimacy experience to be cheapened by your trash thoughts. 



4.     Speak openly with your spouse and experiment with a variety of physical intimacy that isn't sexual. 



5.