IGNITE!: Fueling World-Class Performance Even If Your Employees Are Not Yet World-Class

By Steve C Lover

For decades people have been told that the secret to success is a good education. But is it true? Many of the biggest names in the business world today never got a college degree.

After much research and thought Steve Lover has come to the

• Language: English
• Publisher: Manuscripts LLC
• Release date: Feb 27, 2024
• ISBN: 9798885043779

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Manuscripts

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Copyright © 2024 Steve Lover

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IGNITE!

Fueling World-Class Performance Even If Your Employees Are Not Yet World-Class

ISBN

979-8-88926-021-9 Paperback

ISBN

978-1-63676-001-8 Hardcover

ISBN

979-8-88504-377-9 Digital Ebook

Contents

Introduction

Part One. Understanding Confidence

Chapter 1. Success Precedes Confidence

Chapter 2. The Confidence Model

Chapter 3. The Comfort Zone

Chapter 4. The Hard Part Is Starting

Chapter 5. Owning Our Stories

Part Two. Confidence Killers

Chapter 6. The Adult Method of Learning

Chapter 7. Authority Figures

Chapter 8. The School System

Chapter 9. The Self-Esteem Movement

Chapter 10. Fear and Courage

Chapter 11. Unsupportive Environments

Chapter 12. The Art of Celebrations

Part Three. Ignite Confidence

Chapter 13. Helping Others Create Confidence

Chapter 14. The Business Game

Chapter 15. Inspiring Challenges

Chapter 16. Encouraging Effort

Chapter 17. Celebrating Results

Chapter 18. Designing Culture

Chapter 19. The Importance of Language

Chapter 20. Conclusion

Acknowledgments

The Distinctionary

Appendix

Introduction

Not long before the Great Depression, a businessman was having a difficult time. Sales were slow, and he couldn’t get any traction. Feeling dejected, disappointed, and totally unsure of himself, he went for a walk in a nearby park, thinking the fresh air would help lift his spirits and he could look at his situation from a new perspective. The sun shone, the birds chirped, and the children ran around, playing ball and tag. The intoxicating scent of spring was in the air, and it was almost impossible not to feel calmer in this setting. He sat down on a bench to rest a little.

An elderly man approached him and said he noticed something seemed to be bothering the businessman. The elderly man asked what was wrong and maybe he could help. The businessman responded that he doubted he could help, but the stranger persisted.

Finally, after much coaxing and prodding, the businessman opened up and honestly told the elderly man of his difficulties and fears: the shrinking sales, the operational difficulties, and the slow trickle of revenue; the fear he could not keep going too much longer and he might have to close the business and maybe even declare bankruptcy.

The old man asked the businessman how much it would it take to make the problem go away. The businessman answered with a wry smile and a little laugh that he only needed $100,000 (a small fortune at the time) to get everything back in order. However, he had no way to come up with that kind of money.

The elderly man was quiet for a couple of minutes. Finally, he looked up with a kind smile and said, You’re in luck! I can help! He withdrew a checkbook and wrote a check for $100,000 and gave it to the businessman. The businessman was flabbergasted when he saw the signature. It read Andrew Carnegie, the world-famous multi-millionaire industrialist and philanthropist.

The businessman was very grateful and he thanked Mr. Carnegie profusely. The elderly financier was very happy to help and told the businessman to meet him in the park one year from that day and the businessman could pay him back the loan. The businessman agreed and almost floated out of the park. He couldn’t believe his good fortune. No one would believe what just happened to him.

On the way back to the office, the businessman started thinking. He had the check and could deposit it anytime he wanted. However, he wanted to try to save his company and turn things around on his own—without using the check. He decided to try some old fashion hustle and new approaches to getting more customers who would buy more products. He could always use the funds if he ever needed them. The check gave him new confidence to try new things. He felt refreshed and invigorated.

Through his new approach and mindset, his business had a complete turnaround. He increased sales dramatically, found better deals on highly profitable merchandise, and in no time became more successful than he had ever been.

One year later, it was time to meet Mr. Carnegie in the park again. The businessman was proud and excited to return the original check. Arriving at about the same time of day as the year before, the businessman noted how different it felt this time. Although the weather was the same as before, it seemed to mirror his sunny attitude as opposed to lift it.

As he got to the place where they met the year prior, he saw Mr. Carnegie walking to the same bench. He greeted his benefactor warmly and began to tell him the story. However, before he could get too far into the details, a nurse approached and apologized to the businessman. I hope he hasn’t been bothering you, she said. He often gets out of the home without anyone noticing and tells people he is Andrew Carnegie.

The man was dumbfounded. It was almost as sublime as the meeting a year ago. He had a useless piece of paper in his hand that he thought was worth $100,000. What was it about having the check in his pocket that allowed him to take the actions he did to revive his business?

Maybe the ticket is not education but something else

For a long time, many are told your ticket to success is by getting a university education! Our world has come to accept the notion that knowledge is the key to success. But is it true?

When looking at successful people, their degree of knowledge or education had little or no bearing on their success. There are many stories of very successful people who dropped out of university and went on to become some of the richest and most successful people in the world. Some examples include Bill Gates, Steve Jobs, Michael Dell, and Jeff Bezos. This is a very, very long list. Yet, we keep telling kids, Get a degree!

I have been working with people in many different capacities over a number of decades and have found it fascinating that college education has little ultimate effect on a person’s success except for highly technical fields—medicine, engineering, and similar industries that need experience before working. Actually, once a person has experience, the question of their degree is of little interest.

If the biggest factor of success isn’t education or even knowledge, what is it? What is the secret sauce that makes the big difference between the super successful and the also rans?

Before I answer those questions, I want to share with you the backstory of how I originally became interested in such a big subject.

My journey starts

I started my career as a rabbi and served communities in both Europe and the United States. Ultimately, because of my growing family, I went from nonprofit to profit, and I started a small advertising and publishing business. Honestly, I had no business getting into that franchise because it was too capital intensive, and I didn’t have the money. The business failed miserably, and I was left with a mountain of debt, a wife, six children, and no income. It was a very scary time.

I spoke to an old student of mine who suggested I get into the life insurance industry and thought I would do well. I took his advice, and he was right. It was a great industry for me. I learned a lot and created a nice practice.

About four years in, the company I was working for asked me to become the sales development manager, training salespeople for Southeast Michigan. I took the job and loved it.

Insurance agents are all small business people. They pay for their office space. They pay to use the copier. They pay for any marketing they do. The company helps with back office work, compliance, and the brand. They are the epitome of income based on performance. When they make sales they earn, and when they don’t make a sale they don’t have an income.

The company had a philosophy that agents needed three things to be successful:

The knowledge of product and process.

The skill to execute (usually proved in role-plays).

And the desire to be successful.

The problem was, I had scores of agents coming through my doors who learned the knowledge, proved their skill, and were practically dying to finally be successful. Yet, even though they checked all the boxes, they were failing—sometimes miserably. I had to figure out why.

In my research, I found the coaching industry and learned new skills. Ultimately, I realized that the three pillars of the company were all true but incomplete. It was not that simple. If someone came into the company, gained the knowledge, mastered the skill, and deeply desired to be successful, it might not be enough. If he was fearful of rejection and couldn’t bring himself to make calls, he would fail. If he couldn’t execute the skills, he could still fail. If either success or failure frightened him, he could still fail.

So, what was the missing ingredient that would truly make the difference? What did someone need to have that could be a true measure of becoming successful?

I had some ideas to make some changes in the company’s approach, and they made it clear to me that they were pretty happy with their status quo. So, I left my comfortable corporate position and opened my coaching practice.

Discovering the missing link

I started modestly and worked mostly in the financial services industry. In my first year, I had some fantastic things happen. A couple of financial wholesalers became clients. One of them increased his unit from $50 million to $100 million in one year. More importantly, he replaced nine of his top ten producers with higher quality agents. Another wholesaler was ranked number forty-three out of fifty-two in his territory. Within six months, he had moved to number two. A third wholesaler had never received all possible annual bonuses by the end of December yet had maxed them all out in September. Clearly, I was doing something right with my clients. They were getting great results, which was hugely impactful for them and very gratifying for me.

I also met a young man, Brian, who was trying to become an entrepreneur and was stuck. He was a quality person, but the easy-to-forget, quiet type who was soaking everything up around him but wasn’t really making headway. At our first meeting, we spoke about what he really wanted out of his life and business, and Brian had beautiful visions. He was especially interested in mentoring disadvantaged kids. When we began to discuss practical ways to make those things happen, he kept saying, But I am not good enough!

That dreaded sentence came up a number of times before I finally asked him, What’s up with that?

He said he never went to college. He didn’t make a lot of money. He came from a dysfunctional background. I asked him if he thought a disadvantaged youth would care about any of those things. He said he still wasn’t good enough. I did an exercise with Brian that I often do with clients to help them find out where those thoughts are coming from. I had never done it on a first appointment before, but Brian was game and willing to get to the bottom of it.

The exercise takes a person to a relaxed state where they can calmly find a memory with important insight. When Brian closed his eyes and got quiet, I asked the questions to help him find the answers. He started crying. Over the years, it has happened many times, but Brian was the first for me. I asked him to share what he found.

Brian told me that as a youngster, he grew up on the wrong side of the tracks. His father was bipolar and physically abusive to his mother. The family was the welfare family in town. In the 1970s, that was a big deal in small-town America.

He told me at one point there was a big contest for second graders throughout the state that he lived in. The student who made the best project explaining the importance of trees would receive a special certificate and recognition. He said this project really excited him. He made a poster that ended up winning first place statewide. The accomplishment was huge and should have been great cause for celebration—an opportunity for this second grader to shine and get a boost.

Instead, the teacher, Miss Hill, brought the certificate into class and said this wasn’t an important project because Brian won first place. Then she tossed the certificate on his desk and continued the day’s lesson. When he finished, I was almost crying with him.

For our next meeting, I asked Brian to meet me at an exclusive business club wearing a suit and tie. He said he didn’t own one, but he could borrow one. Since he was young, his entire wardrobe came from the Salvation Army, and he had never bought new clothing for himself.

When he showed up to the meeting looking great, I asked him what he felt when he saw himself dressed up that morning. He said he couldn’t bring himself to look. I took him immediately to a full-length mirror and made sure he took a good look.

Brian was open, honest, and willing to work. Three months later, he had a position as a marketing manager making $100,000 per year.

Over time, I came to the realization that people’s biggest problem was the fear of doing something new—something not yet comfortable and often scary.

Getting to the real ingredient of success

What differentiates the successful from the also rans? I submit the most important ingredient to success is confidence. A person who has confidence can move mountains. Without it, great things are almost impossible to achieve.

According to the New Oxford American Dictionary, confidence is: a feeling of self-assurance arising from one’s appreciation of one’s own abilities or qualities. That’s right! Confidence is the feeling of knowing what you can and can’t do; the feeling that you can bring value to others; the clarity of being able to accomplish your mission.

But is that really true? Is getting that feeling all there is to having confidence? Most people think you have to have confidence before you succeed. In truth, success precedes confidence. When you do things and