Carina's Birdies

By Kendra Williams

When life gives you birds you make friends. 

 

Death has a funny way of humbling a person. Imagine being 9 years-old and experiencing the loss of one of your best friends. As the family navigates their new reality, Carina unlocks a new level of life. She discovers that a few guardian angels were left behind to help her through her healing process. 

"It will always be three of us."

• Language: English
• Publisher: Kendra Williams
• Release date: Mar 12, 2024
• ISBN: 9798224975921

Book preview

DEDICATION

To all the kids that are fighting each day after the loss of one of their best friends, young or old. There is no time limit on how long the healing and grieving process takes. Take your time.

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

Thank you to all the parents, aunties and uncles that are helping raise the generation to be emotionally conscious. You all are the real MVPs. Keep loving the kids in healthy ways.

1

I thought life wasn’t fair for me until I realized that loving myself was necessary in growing up even at my young age.

Every day I look at myself in the mirror and realize that I’m only nine years old. How did I grow to become such an influence in the world?

See, I just lost my aunt a few days ago and the kids in my school keep asking me how I’m not crying and how I keep showing up for school. To be honest, I don’t know how I’m doing it. I’ve been crying at home in my room, but I don’t know what the kids want me to say.

Carina, how are you doing? You look good. Kennedi asked.

I’m good. I feel good. Do I look bad or something? Carina answered as she touched her ponytails.

That’s why I’m asking because you look so good. How is your mother holding up?

Kennedi why are you asking me questions like a grown up. I don’t want to talk about this. I’m fine and thanks for telling me, Carina stated as she walked away.

What’s her problem? Tika asked Kennedi.

I don’t know. I guess she doesn’t want to be bothered.

Tika shrugged her shoulders. You have been asking her the same questions every day for a week. Maybe she wants to be left alone.

Shut up, Tika! I was just checking on her.

Carina walked away and didn’t bother looking back. I’m so tired of them asking me questions. I’m fine. I look fine and I’m not going to keep answering the same questions, repeatedly.

Carina, Tika and Kennedi, who were brown-skinned beauties, have all been friends since preschool. Their relationship was complicated because some days they were friends and others they weren’t. Being a nine-year-old in the third grade was hard.

Carina zoned out as she sat down at her desk in her math class. Carina, you know what I told you about those girls in your class?

Yes auntie.

And what was it? What did I tell you?

Auntie Melody, you told me not to trust those girls. But I have to. We’re friends.

Babies, I know how you think that they are your friends but they’re more friends with each other than you.

Auntie, what do you mean?

Let me see how to tell you this. You know how when you’re introduced to a new food and you like that food better than your favorites, like yours is pizza and fries. Remember that day I introduced you to those chicken nuggets with that honey mustard sauce and that’s all you wanted for a month. But now that’s one of your favorites.

But I like pizza and fries more.

Exactly. You like it better. That’s my point. They like each other more than they do you.

Auntie, you think so? she asked with a frown on her face.

I do. But I’ll leave that life lesson up to you.

I never thought life would be this complicated. I want to be refunded. I’m only eight auntie.

Melody laughed. You’ll be nine soon and things might slow down for you.

Why are you laughing?

Because I was the same way. I always wanted to be grown until I was grown, now I want to be your age. I want my time back. Take your time growing.

Carina slid closer to her aunt and put her hand on her shoulder before she played with one of her curls. Melody leaned in and tickled her. Carina started laughing and trying to get away.

It wasn’t often that Melody was able to get off work and enjoy the kids. Carina was different to her because she saw so much of herself inside of her.

Well, baby auntie must get going. I’ll be back.

Why do you have to leave? Can I come and stay with you sometimes? she asked standing up anticipating her leaving.

I’ll be back. Don’t be sad.

But what if something happens to you before I see you again?

Carina don’t start with that stuff. I’ll be back before you know it. I’ll text your mom and let her know to pack you a bag.

Carina crossed her arms over her chest. She’s not going to let me know and you’re not going to message her.

Watch. I’ll be back. Stop being dramatic like your auntie, Melody answered standing up.

Carina snapped back as she grabbed her math book and pencil out of her backpack. I glanced around to make sure nobody was watching me. I was getting more stares lately and I’m tired of having to explain my facial expressions. I wonder if Chanel, who is my older sister by two years, is having these flashbacks as well? I’ll ask her tonight. Our lives were different now and everybody keeps looking at us like heroes. I don’t want to be a hero; I want to be nine years old again. I want to go back to a place where I don’t have to worry about responding to everybody about my feelings or emotions.

Chanel, are you ready to give your speech for your assignment today?

Chanel looked on as she tried to remember what her speech was about.

Chanel, you need to concentrate more in class. You remember what your mom told me the last time you were struggling in class?

Auntie, you know how your sister trips, she laughed.

I know but she’s concerned about your grades.

Auntie, my grades are good. I got one B and she’s acting like I was failing.

But Chanel, you do need to focus more. You act like you haven’t been slacking on your grades.

I haven’t, she laughed. I was tired of doing that schoolwork. They wanted me to be in those hard classes and I wanted to chill.

But they put you in an advanced class. You’re about to be moved to a higher grade.

I know auntie, but I didn’t want that at first. I wanted to stay back with Carina because she needed someone to watch her but then you had that talk with her and she’s getting it together.

Well, that’s good. I’m sure Carina can handle herself.

Chanel started laughing and so did Melody. You aren’t even certain about that. Auntie, when are you going to let me spend the night with you? I haven’t done that in a while.

I need to get some things in order, and I’ll make it happen. You don’t want to hang with your friends?

Friends? Auntie, I’m trying to hang out with you. You know you’re getting old, and I need to keep an eye out for you.

Melody started laughing.

I’m serious. You know how you’re always forgetting things.

I don’t, she continued to laugh.

Chanel wiped her eyes and rushed out of the classroom. She wasn’t in the mood to talk about