Almost a Wife: A Journey from Heartbreak to Wholeness

By Christian Janeè

"An incredible, raw, and vulnerable sharing of Christian's journey for acceptance, insight, self-esteem, healing, and purpose through Jesus Christ our savior!" - Wendy O'shaughnessy

Sitting on my bedroom floor, surrounded by my Sitting on my bedroom floor, surrounded by my br

• Language: English
• Publisher: Trilogy Christian Publishing
• Release date: Apr 2, 2024
• ISBN: 9798890419248

Christian Janeè

Christian is known most for her faith walk and passion for holistic health. She is passion- ate about healing and facilitating safe spaces where others may heal spiritually, physically, mentally, emotionally, and financially. She enjoys her intimate time with Jesus, spending time with family, traveling, cooking, hiking, and snuggling on the couch with her fur baby.

Book preview

A love story

between a girl and her God

Dedication

This book is dedicated to: My Lord and Savior, my parents, my siblings, my girls, and…to the broken version of me (look what God did girl!).

Lord, I thank You for Your patience and relentless pursuit of my heart. Mom and Dad, thank you for your prayers, advice, and support. Siblings, thank y’all for the deep laughs and encouragement. To my girls, GOD showed out when He gave me y’all! Thank you for your honesty, insight, hugs, prayers, and ears. Mostly, thank you for refusing to allow me to settle. To the old me, thank you for following God’s plan and for putting in the work to heal our broken heart.

Introduction

Hey there! Thank you for being curious enough to grab this book. I pray that the testimonies and prayers bless you abundantly. I pray that you are freed from whatever bondage you are entangled in and that, at the end of this book, you feel more equipped to walk fully in the purpose which God created you for. I pray that you seek healthy relationships or are able to mend your current ones, if that’s what God told you to do. Most of all, I pray that you feel closer to Him. The One who loves you the most.

Almost a Wife is about my journey to discovering, more so accepting, the calling God has for me. The calling to not only follow Him in my career choices but to accept the calling to be a wife. A Godly wife. I’d seen a lot of divorce growing up and thus had no idea what a healthy marriage looked like. I did see what a good mother was, as well as an ambitious woman, so this is what I aspired to be. I wanted to be a mommy and a doctor. But what’s that saying? God laughs at the plans of man—I’m not sure if He laughed, but I’m sure He smirked and told Gabriel, Look how cute she is, thinking she’s got it all figured out. God, I thank You for being patient and persistent with me.

I wasn’t ready to be a wife. The funny thing is all the men I encountered saw that anointing on me. I was just living in the moment. I hope that this story inspires you to make a better choice. I hope that it saves you the heartache. I hope that it releases you from situations and relationships that God never called you too. I hope you see how loved, deeply, madly, and completely loved, you truly are. You are worth the work and worth the wait. Now let’s get to it!

Seek the Kingdom of God above everything else, and live righteously, and He will provide everything you need.

Matthew 6:33 (NLT)

Part 1: Bonding

in Brokenness

(We attract who we really are)

Sitting on my bedroom floor, calling out to God after yet another heartbreak, I finally surrendered. God, there has to be a better way. I had a real, raw, not so glamorous conversation with The Father. I have a good heart, I’m a good person, why does this keep happening to me? Sound familiar? 

I’m a serial monogamist, motivator, and overly empathetic (if there is such a thing). I cry watching commercials and most Disney movies. I laugh at the sound of another’s laughter. My heart leaps for joy when I learn of others overcoming their obstacles. As a healthcare provider, I’ve been able to use my empathy as my superpower. But in my relationships, it’s been my kryptonite. I had to accept that I’m not the healer, God is. And acknowledge that there was healing that needed to take place in me.

On that floor, surrounded by my brokenness, I accepted God’s invitation to wholeness. He replaced my fear of being alone with faith that He will supply all my needs. He covered all my goop, the not so pretty parts of my past, with His grace. He took all my flaws and called them favored. I’m so grateful to serve a patient, yet persistent God. A God who will