Less Drama More Mama: How to Go from Frazzled and Disrespected to Calm and Connected

By Pam Howard

Your family needs less drama and more mama!

If parenting has you feeling overwhelmed, stressed out, or powerless, this book is for you.

Drawing from over 20 years of experience working with parents and kids, Pam Howard guides you step-by-step to transform frustrating thoughts and habitual struggle into conscious, loving connections with yourself and your kids.

Each chapter focuses on the only person you can control as a parent—you. Pam's book explores shifts in perspective and reveals parenting truths that will set you free and completely transform the way you view your relationships and life. Less Drama More Mama will help you:

• handle your emotions in a mature and healthy way
• define what it means to be a good mom
• overcome perfectionism
• set clear boundaries for yourself
• make parenting decisions with confidence

Get ready to feel more at peace with yourself and more connected to your kids right away!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Less Drama More Mama
• Release date: Oct 16, 2023
• ISBN: 9798987877814

Book preview

Copyright © 2023, Pam Howard

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical (including any information storage retrieval system) without the express written permission from the author, except in the case of brief quotations for use in articles and reviews wherein appropriate attribution of the source is made.

Publishing support provided by

Ignite Press

5070 N. Sixth St. #189

Fresno, CA 93710

www.IgnitePress.us

ISBN: 979-8-9878778-0-7

ISBN: 979-8-9878778-2-1 (Hardcover)

ISBN: 979-8-9878778-1-4 (E-book)

For bulk purchase and for booking, contact:

Pam Howard

[e-mail]

https://lessdramamoremama.com

The information in this book is based on the author’s knowledge, experience, and opinions. The methods described in this book are not intended to be a definitive set of instructions. The reader may discover other methods and materials to accomplish the same end result. Results from person to person may differ.

This book is not intended as a substitute for the advice of medical or mental health professionals. The reader should consult a medical or mental health professional in matters relating to his/her health and particularly with respect to any symptoms that may require diagnosis or medical attention. The publisher and the author are not responsible for any actions the reader takes or does not take as a result of reading this book, and are not liable for any damages or negative consequences from action or inaction to any person reading or following the information in this book.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, web addresses or links contained in this book may have been changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The content of this book and all expressed opinions are those of the author and do not reflect the publisher or the publishing team. The author is solely responsible for all content included herein.

Library of Congress Control Number: 2023903254

Cover design by Alexander Valchev

Edited by Elizabeth Arterberry

Interior design by Jetlaunch

FIRST EDITION

To Mom and Dad – you are the perfect parents for me and

have helped shape me into the woman and mother I am today.

I’m profoundly grateful for both of you.

Acknowledgments

There are so many people to thank who have supported me in making this book a reality.

To my publishing team at Ignite Press (Everett O’Keefe, Malia Sexton, and Zelda Fogle): Thank you for your patience and guidance in helping me publish my very first book! It was a pleasure working with you and I hope to do it again soon.

To my book coach, Cathy Fyock: Thank you for helping me organize my thoughts and ideas to get clear about how I wanted to structure the book, and for always being so enthusiastic about my writing. Your experience and counsel have been invaluable to me as I’ve embarked on my journey as an author and speaker. You also helped me realize that I am, in fact, a high-achiever. Who knew?

To Carla Naumburg, the down-to-earth, hilarious, smart-as-a-whip woman who is also a fellow parenting book author, social worker, Jewish mama, and friend: Thank you for the incredible work you do in the world to empower parents, for your ongoing support of me and my business, and for endorsing my book.

To the Less Drama More Mama team (Daniel Abendroth, Hannah Fleace, and Ashton Barrett): Thank you for helping me get my message out into the world. You are all so talented and professional, and I appreciate all that you do for me every day.

To my DKJA family of administrators, teachers, students, and families: Thank you for letting me teach the concepts in this book and use my coaching skills with everyone and anyone who would listen. And thank you for supporting me in raising my kids and loving them almost as much as I do.

To the many life and business coaches who held space for me while I waded through my limiting beliefs and self-doubt and helped me find the courage to take massive action: Greg Faxon, Alison Reeves, Molly Claire, Aimee Gianni, Lisa Martinello, Lisa Salamone, Roxanna Patterson, Kendra Huffman, Rhonda Farr, Meg Tilton, Natalie Brown, and all of my sisters from master coach training and The Coaching Collective.

To Hal Runkel: Your book changed my life and enabled me to become the mom I always knew I was meant to be. I hope my book can do the same for someone else. Thank you for giving me a framework to get my business and blog off the ground in 2012 with your training in Atlanta. I will forever be indebted to you.

To my coach with a capital C, Brooke Castillo (aka Brookie): Reading your book in 2013 was a huge turning point that set me on the path to becoming a certified master coach. Your teachings have impacted every aspect of my life and your coaching (whether you’re coaching me or someone else) always leaves an indelible imprint on me. One of the highlights of my career so far was teaching a parenting class with you inside Scholars and I hope we can team up again some day. Thank you for always living your purpose and being an example to me of what is possible.

To my sister and editor-extraordinaire, Stephanie Howard: With patience, compassion, and humor, you not only help me take my jumbled thoughts and actually make sense of them, you also challenge me to think more critically and express myself in a clear and concise way. From witnessing my worst moments as a mom to celebrating my best, you’ve been there for me through it all. I love you so so so much!

To Mom and Dad: I can’t imagine my life without your endless love and support in everything I do. I know that you’re my biggest fans, and I hope you know I’m yours, too. My kids are so blessed to have you as their grandparents and we’re all so lucky to live near each other and spend as much time together as we do.

To Marissa (aka Milo) and Dalia: Of course, none of the content for this book would even exist without you. You are my mirrors, my teachers, and my greatest joys in life. Thank you for always believing in me and cheering me on whenever I doubted myself and for being the best kids a mom could ever imagine. I am beyond proud of who you are and feel utterly grateful that I get to be your mom.

To my blog readers, podcast listeners, and clients: Thank you for being receptive to my work, trusting me with your struggles, being open to change, and always reminding me why I love what I do.

Finally, to the mom who hadn’t heard of me before, but picked up this book to find relief from feelings of overwhelm, anxiety, or guilt: Thank you for having the courage to pick it up. Thank you for recognizing your potential to feel a whole lot better and that you are deserving of support. I hope you find the relief in these pages that you’re seeking, and I’m here to keep supporting you as you continue along your parenting path.

Table of Contents

Letter to My Reader

My Story

Truth # 1: Your Kids Can’t Make You Angry

Truth # 2: Parenting Is Supposed To Feel Hard

Truth # 3: Feelings Don’t Need To Be Fixed; They Need To Be Felt

Truth # 4: You Define What It Means To Be A Good Mom

Truth # 5: You’re The Perfect Mom For Them

Truth # 6: Self-Care Isn’t Selfish, And People Pleasing Is

Truth # 7: There’s Nothing You Have To Do

Truth # 8: There Are No Wrong Decisions

Truth # 9: There’s Nothing You Can’t Handle

Put Down the Parenting Book

About the Author

LETTER TO MY READER

Dear Mama,

I see you.

You work so hard for your family every day.

You do the cooking, the cleaning, the laundry, the scheduling, and the driving.

You wipe noses and tushies and tear-stained cheeks.

You cuddle, kiss, and console.

You deal with homework hassles, mealtime messes, bedtime battles, and screen time struggles.

You’re the one they love the most, and the one they sometimes treat the worst.

The lows are unbearable—you feel exhausted, alone, inadequate, overwhelmed, and frustrated.

There are times you never imagined you could feel such rage.

The highs are incredible—you feel blessed beyond measure and overflowing with gratitude.

There are times you never imagined you could feel such love.

Sometimes you fantasize about running away from it all because raising good, responsible humans seems too daunting a task.

Even so, you stay—and you slay. You wake up every morning determined to do it better than the day before.

And guess what? You are doing it! This parenting thing.

Even though it feels like you may never figure it all out, you keep showing up day after hectic day.

Good news is, no matter how old you or your kids are, or what state your relationships are in, it’s never too late to make