Climbing Out of Depression

By Jacklyn Brown

It has been written, I have unusual insight into the problems of human existence. My ability to assist people on their journey to overcome life's challenges comes from an inner wellspring of Spirit. Additionally, my studies help me analyze how and why things work in our lives. Credentials and degrees are the usual criter

• Language: English
• Publisher: Authors' Tranquility Press
• Release date: Mar 23, 2023
• ISBN: 9781960675514

Book preview

Prologue

Are you at a point where life has lost meaning? A time when the spark of enthusiasm has been extinguished?

Sometimes the shift from optimism to depression seems to happen gradually without awareness of its cause. Or it may be the result of a tragic event. An illness, a death, a divorce, a loss of a job, financial problems, or unhappy relationships can feel like one's world has collapsed.

Roadblocks, detours, and dead-end alleys occur for everyone. There are times each of us feels life is on the rocks. How long we remain stuck is our choice.

Originally, this was to be the sequel to Confessions of a Caregiver. The book is to help prepare for the drastic change that occurs after the death of a loved one. The intention was to give motivation, hope, and guidance to assist one in moving forward.

However, the tendency to get stuck or not knowing what to do next is not limited to moving on after being a caregiver. Each person comes to a point where it is necessary to get off the pity pot and get back into a productive, happy life. You, too, can jump out of your slump when you realize you’re stuck and want to move forward into a happy, fulfilling life.

Ready. Get set. Get determined. Begin your journey! Climb the ladder to a new awareness, freedom, and peace.

Rung One:

In The Muck

Stop Suffering

An unknown author said, If you find yourself in a hole, the first thing to do is stop digging. This sounds like an obvious first step, yet many people do just the opposite.

Life can sometimes seem like the water in a toilet bowl, spiraling down into unrecoverable territory. When life has gone down the drain, and the hole appears too deep to ever climb out, the tendency is to take the easy way. That is, to dwell on the problem, which causes all energy to be focused totally on the problem.

Concentrating on the problem brings forth a negative energy which is heavy and debilitating. At this point, many people will claim they are exhausted and unable to do anything. In fact, they are stuck because they have no positive energy to motivate action.

Non-action is based on fear, insecurities, and not knowing what to do. This resulting state creates an atmosphere which seems to surround, permeate, and smother until one feels helpless. All energy, motivation, and hope have been drained from the person. Every hurt and loss is magnified. Thus, the natural response is to give up and stop trying.

Are you at this point? Are you exhausted with no energy to get out of the situation? This is a result of worry and hopelessness. Not only does it cause depression, it often manifests as an illness or illnesses. A depressed person accepts this as giving further excuses to surrender and stay in the muck. They often invite or demand loved ones or caregivers to join in the misery.

Without a way out, there is a tendency to blame others, to feel anger at those who have a productive life. It’s as if the world is against us. We cry out, Why must I suffer? Of course, if you are depressed, you already know this.

Depression is like a pit of snakes hissing negative thoughts into an already distraught mind. Life does not always seem fair, and that hurts.

Depression comes when we feel a complete lack of self-control. We surrender our power to the situation and those we deem to have control over us. We accept the belief that we cannot tackle what has come upon us.

However, at every turn, we have a choice. We can succumb, or we can accept everything as a lesson and learn from it. When we are in a horrible situation, the last thing we want to do is to accept it. At first, we may use our energy to strike back, even when there is no place to strike. The more a person dwells on a poisonous situation, the more hissing thoughts and stinging feelings one encounters. Also, the more insurmountable the problem becomes.

After the tears, anger, and loss, along with the grief and hopelessness, we can shut down and not see any possible way out.

Life is meant to go from one stage to another. It is just like going from one grade to the next through college or grad school and into the work world. Your stages may have been different, yet there was a progression. Along the way, you followed the path as you saw it based on the choices you made.

Very few of us want to acknowledge that our life is our own creation. Certainly, we do not want to think the bad conditions are a result of our choices. However, until we begin to accept responsibility and focus on the solution, we are stuck.

The Law of the Universe is about moving. Everything moves. Nothing stands still. To stop living is violating natural laws. To sequester yourself in the pain and suffering of your situation is to retreat. You thereby forfeit the opportunity to express your purpose, to face the area of needed growth, and learn the lesson you need to become a better, stronger person.

About now you are declaring, But my situation is different. It is impossible. However, impossible is only true because it has yet to be achieved.

Why We Get Stuck

Coping with life challenges can be so overwhelming that you want to give up. Instead of reaching out for solutions, the mind plays the blame game directed at itself or another. When the mind is full of excuses, defeat is accepted. The energy that could have been directed toward a solution is diminished until I can't becomes the overriding belief.

Hopelessness and helplessness are twin patterns that assure failure. When a person lacks vision, she cannot see anything better and does not aim to transform or improve her life. People become depressed, sometimes suicidal when these twins run unchecked. Logic will assist in correcting the pattern.

Take this little experiment. Close one eye and hold a dime very close to the other eye. What do you see? If you are holding the dime properly, you cannot define what it is, only that something huge is blocking your view. To determine what it is, you need to put distance between the dime and your eye. It also helps to open the other eye.

When you hold a problem or limitation very close, you are blocking your view. Reminding yourself of the reasons you cannot accomplish anything are excuses that close all doors and thus keeping you from freedom. You then remain stuck in the self-declared hopeless situation. It is like closing one eye and holding the limitation in front of the other eye. You cannot help yourself until you are able to make a proper evaluation of the situation.

The tendency is to gather all the problems into an overflowing bundle and hold them so close that it is impossible to see anything else. If you were asked to describe your main problem, you would most likely go on and on about the unfairness. The way you describe your situation reveals the beliefs holding you prisoner. It is likely that regardless of the help or suggestions offered, you come up with reasons why they will not work.

Try to describe the root problem. Is it a job loss, an illness, a breakup, or you fill in the blank. Now, look at the thoughts and feelings that you have surrounding this situation. They are undoubtedly negative, further holding the situation and you in bondage. It’s not so much the condition that creates depression and stagnation as it is your belief, attitude, and reaction.

There are times in all our lives when we get stuck and need a new sense of direction. When we get a sense of how things can be different, we need to change the sucking muck into a solid foundation.

Think about the ladder on the cover of this book. Without a firm foundation, even the tallest ladder would sink into the mud. This firm starting point is a result of accepting the fact that no matter how bad or hopeless something appears, you have the power to accomplish all that is necessary.

This very situation may be a call to wake up and take responsibility. You and only you can take off the blinders of helplessness. It is not quite like Clark Kent stepping into a phone booth and suddenly becoming Superman. It does mean reaching inside yourself to find the wisdom and strength that will eventually bring you up to the surface.

If the old way of seeing and reacting to this situation is obviously not working. A new way must be found and followed. It is your responsibility to forge a new path where none has existed.

At this point in time, too much thought has been directed into what is not wanted or what does not exist. To protect yourself, you are going to have to take control and start moving.

There are several reasons why moving on is absolutely necessary. It begins with remaining stuck in the experience prevents a person from experiencing the joys of the present. What happened is in the past, it is over. Yet, to be stuck is to recreate it in the present through thoughts and feelings.

Now, quietly observe your excuses, justifications, and rationales. Especially consider those who run counter to this concept of moving on.

Grief and Stagnation

Life can, and often does hurt. Problems happen, and getting through them allows us to learn and heal. Whenever anything negative occurs, be it loss of a job, death of a loved one, an illness, a broken relationship, rejection, or the situation you are in right now, it is natural to grieve. We grieve because we have lost something.

When Jo's mother suddenly died, she continued to function on automatic. However, inwardly, she felt she had died. When she looked into the mirror, she saw her mother's face.