Triumph over Trauma: Find Healing and Wholeness from Past Pain

By Gregory L. PhD Jantz and Keith Wall

Traumatic experiences happen to nearly everyone, at some time, in some form. The aftereffects--depression, anxiety, addiction, panic attacks, insomnia, and more--can affect us for years or even a lifetime. But the brokenness following a traumatic event is never a life sentence. We are all changed by trauma, but we do not have to be defined by it.

Drawing on cutting-edge research, Triumph over Trauma empowers you to find relief and hope once and for all. Rather than offering a one-size-fits-all solution, this whole-person treatment approach recognizes you as a unique constellation of emotional, physical, intellectual, relational, and spiritual dimensions. This book explains how trauma affects your emotions, body, brain, relationships, soul, and dreams. Then it shows you how to create a personalized plan to find your way back to wholeness, joy, and peace.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Baker Publishing Group
• Release date: Mar 28, 2023
• ISBN: 9781493439867

Gregory L. PhD Jantz

Gregory L. Jantz, PhD, is a popular speaker and award-winning author of many books, including Healing the Scars of Emotional Abuse, Healing the Scars of Childhood Abuse, and Overcoming Anxiety, Worry, and Fear. He is the founder of The Center • A Place of Hope (www.aplaceofhope.com) in Washington State. Learn more at www.drgregoryjantz.com.

Book preview

Praise for So Much to Live For

(with Keith Wall)

The suicide rate in the US is astounding, yet many people don’t know how to approach a friend or family member who is facing the struggle. Dr. Jantz is on a mission to save lives as he provides clear and compassionate strategies for approaching suicide intervention.

Harold G. Koenig, MD, professor of psychiatry and behavioral sciences and director of the Center for Spirituality, Theology, and Health at Duke University

This is an impressive, uplifting book about what can be an overwhelming topic. Read it now. You need this wisdom so you can be proactive instead of reactive when (not if) someone you know doubts life is worth living. Dr. Jantz does what he says he’ll do—he provides excellent help that will increase your hope. The book is easy to read and is full of inspiring illustrations, timely examples, and practical, sensible ideas and strategies. Parents, educators, pastors, and other professionals will be better prepared to love people well who live with pressures and challenges. Suicide is preventable!

Dr. Kathy Koch, founder of Celebrate Kids, Inc., and author of Screens and Teens, 8 Great Smarts, Start with the Heart, and Five to Thrive

Praise for Overcoming Anxiety, Worry,

and Fear (with Ann McMurray)

Jantz uses common sense, biblical wisdom, and therapeutic advice to help readers free themselves from anxiety that can cripple their lives. . . . He offers excellent advice, and the religious aspects, while helpful to Christians, are not a hindrance to nonbelievers.

Library Journal

Praise for Healing the Scars of Addiction

(with Ann McMurray)

"Pain is inevitable—but misery is optional. If you are miserable because of some addiction, some repetitive pattern of behavior that only brings you suffering, then opt for freedom! In Healing the Scars of Addiction, Dr. Jantz has provided the tools you need to heal, to overcome—to be free!"

Timothy R. Jennings, MD, DFAPA, past president of the Tennessee and Southern Psychiatric Associations and author of The God-Shaped Heart: How Correctly Understanding God’s Love Transforms Us

"Healing the Scars of Addiction provides understanding, helpful steps, and realistic hope for those who are struggling with various forms of addiction and want to reclaim their lives from addiction and move forward into a healthier life. I highly recommend it!"

Siang-Yang Tan, PhD, professor of psychology at Fuller Theological Seminary and author of Counseling and Psychotherapy: A Christian Perspective

Praise for Healing the Scars of Childhood Abuse

(with Ann McMurray)

"Healing the Scars of Childhood Abuse is a very important book. It takes on the lasting implications of childhood trauma with empathy and hope. Dr. Jantz tells the story of trauma through the eyes of the children. Those stories make this book a page-turner. As the stories unfold, the author’s psychological wisdom and practical insight grow organically. In this way, this book is a moving personal experience. I highly recommend this book to anyone who is ready to heal the past and build a new future."

Michael Gurian, New York Times bestselling author of The Wonder of Boys and The Wonder of Girls

"Healing the Scars of Childhood Abuse is a clearly written book that will be of great help to those dealing with the long-term effects of childhood abuse and wanting to heal and move on to deeper wholeness. I highly recommend it!"

Siang-Yang Tan, PhD, professor of psychology at Fuller Theological Seminary and author of Counseling and Psychotherapy: A Christian Perspective

books

© 2023 by Gregory L. Jantz

Published by Revell

a division of Baker Publishing Group

PO Box 6287, Grand Rapids, MI 49516-6287

www.revellbooks.com

Ebook edition created 2023

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—for example, electronic, photocopy, recording—without the prior written permission of the publisher. The only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is on file at the Library of Congress, Washington, DC.

ISBN 978-1-4934-3986-7

Unless otherwise indicated, Scripture quotations are from THE HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®, NIV® Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Scripture quotations labeled ESV are from The Holy Bible, English Standard Version® (ESV®), copyright © 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved. ESV Text Edition: 2016.

Scripture quotations labeled MSG are from THE MESSAGE, copyright © 1993, 2002, 2018 by Eugene H. Peterson. Used by permission of NavPress. All rights reserved. Represented by Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.

Scripture quotations labeled NASB are from the (NASB®) New American Standard Bible®, Copyright © 1960, 1971, 1977, 1995, 2020 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. All rights reserved. www.lockman.org

Scripture quotations labeled NKJV are from the New King James Version®. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations labeled NLT are from the Holy Bible, New Living Translation, copyright © 1996, 2004, 2015 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

The names and details of the people and situations described in this book have been changed or presented in composite form in order to ensure the privacy of those with whom the author has worked.

Published in association with The Bindery Agency, www.TheBinderyAgency.com.

Baker Publishing Group publications use paper produced from sustainable forestry practices and post-consumer waste whenever possible.

This book is dedicated to the countless people

who have endured hardship and heartache . . .

and summoned the courage to seek healing.

God’s love and grace will comfort

your deepest wounds.

Contents

Cover

Endorsements    1

Half Title Page    5

Books by the Authors    6

Title Page    7

Copyright Page    8

Dedication    9

Part 1:  Broken: Trauma Strikes Suddenly or Gradually    13

1. The Truth Will Set You Free: Overcoming Trauma Requires Honesty and Courage    15

2. Hope amid Heartache: Trauma Happens to Nearly Everyone—and Healing Can Too    21

3. Ten Truths about Trauma: A Candid Look at Complex Issues    33

Part 2:  Trauma: The Loss of Your True Self    45

4. Repressed and Depressed: How Trauma Disables the Emotions    47

5. Emotional Pain, Physical Problems: How Trauma Distresses the Body    59

6. Interrupted Circuitry: How Trauma Disrupts the Brain    71

7. Wary and Watchful: How Trauma Diminishes Relationships    85

8. Crushed in Spirit: How Trauma Damages the Soul    97

9. Bright Future Dimmed: How Trauma Derails Dreams    107

Part 3:  Recovery: The Way Back to Your True Self    117

10. Restore Your Freedom: Why Forgiveness Is Essential for Healing    119

11. Revisit the Hurt: Grieve Your Losses to Move Beyond    131

12. Revitalize Your Body: Regain Your Physical Strength and Confidence    143

13. Reset Your Brain: Fully in Gear and without Fear    157

14. Reconnect with People: Learn to Trust Those Who Are Trustworthy    171

15. Revise Your Script: Update Your Life Narrative Based on Fact, Not Fiction    183

16. Reclaim Your Power: Your Strength and Resilience Are More Than Enough    195

17. Reinforce Your Spirituality: Tap into God’s Healing Power    207

A Closing Word: Make Hope a Daily Choice    219

Acknowledgments    221

Appendix A: Proven and Promising Treatments for Trauma Recovery    223

Appendix B: Avoid Anesthesia to Soothe Your Pain    235

Appendix C: Recommended Resources    239

Notes    243

About the Author    251

Back Ads    253

Back Cover    255

1

The Truth Will Set You Free

Overcoming Trauma Requires Honesty and Courage

A profoundly painful experience happened to you—recently or long ago—and now you wonder if you will ever again feel safe, joyful, and self-assured.

You wonder if you can overcome persistent fear and anxiety.

You wonder if your relationships will forever be impaired.

You wonder if you will ever sleep peacefully through the night.

You wonder if you can feel fully yourself, the person God created you to be, brimming with potential and promise.

I humbly but confidently say that you can indeed live a life filled with contentment, confidence, optimism, and gratitude.

No matter how much hurt you are enduring, and no matter how heartbroken you feel, there is hope. You can cling to hope that you will not only survive but will go on to thrive.

That is the message woven throughout these pages. My encouragement to cling to hope is not a pipe dream or a pep talk. It is a real-life conviction based on my thirty years of working as a mental health professional treating a wide variety of serious issues, including addiction, depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and relationship problems.

Many years ago, when I founded a mental health and treatment clinic (now called The Center • A Place of HOPE), I didn’t fully understand that most ailments and afflictions people deal with can be traced back to trauma of some kind.

Along the way, I have encountered countless instances of trauma, where individuals suffered a deep wound inflicted by another person or because of unfortunate circumstances. Whatever the cause, traumatic incidents leave us feeling deeply shaken, if not completely shattered.

Trauma sometimes happens in the most deplorable ways we can imagine, such as sexual assault, domestic violence, combat, or public shootings. Other forms are more common but no less devastating: the loss of a loved one, a bitter divorce, or being diagnosed with a life-threatening disease. The COVID-19 pandemic brought unexpected trauma to millions of people through prolonged sickness, sudden job loss, financial crisis, loss of loved ones, or relapse into substance abuse. Simply put, any experience that leaves a person deeply wounded and feeling broken inside can have long-lasting detrimental effects.

Many people suffering the aftermath of past pain are unwilling or unable to address the initial traumatic event and therefore stay stuck in unhealthy patterns of behavior and emotional distress. Other people have tried therapeutic approaches but have found the advice to be ineffective or short-lived.

Unresolved trauma has devastating results. Researchers have shown that survivors of accidents, disasters, childhood abuse, and other traumas often endure lifelong symptoms ranging from anxiety and depression to unexplained physical pain, fatigue, illness, and harmful acting out behaviors.

In the process, you lose a part of who you are—your true self. I agree with psychiatrist Bessel van der Kolk, who says:

Traumatized people chronically feel unsafe. . . . The past is alive in the form of gnawing interior discomfort. Their bodies are constantly bombarded by visceral warning signs, and, in an attempt to control these processes, they often become expert at ignoring their gut feelings and in numbing awareness of what is played out inside. They learn to hide from their selves.1

You do not need to hide from yourself—your brokenness—any longer. You do not need to avoid the events that have left you feeling trapped in hurt. The courage to explore your past pain will lead you to new understanding about yourself and the events that wounded you. As you pursue healing, you will affirm the Scripture passage that says, You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free (John 8:32).

Time and again, as I have worked with people struggling with the aftereffects of trauma, I have been reminded of four essential points vital for you to know.

1. Trauma leaves scars that will never completely go away, but you can have a fuller, richer life because of your experiences. There is simply no sense in trying to diminish or dismiss the impact of traumatic events—they cut you to the core and hurt you deeply. Working through trauma and repairing the damage will be one of the hardest things you’ll do in life. You will need to invest yourself in the process of healing, which itself is challenging and painful. The prize will be the kind of life you’ve longed for, with close relationships, inner peace, and energy to pursue your dreams.

2. Trauma survivors often feel deep-rooted shame, guilt, and remorse—which are unjustified and unfair. This is one of the tragic ironies of trauma: Those who are innocent suffer emotional turmoil, creating many associated problems to deal with. An essential component for healing is to recognize unhealthy emotions that don’t belong to you and replace them with healthy ones that do belong to you.

3. Hope is a powerful ally in the quest to work through heartache and restore damaged emotions. Of course, other factors are also essential to achieve healing, such as wise counsel, courage to address pain, support from friends, and establishing healthy habits. But I believe that hope is the indispensable quality that allows you to overcome hardship and press forward to a bright future.

4. God is the ultimate restorer and healer of broken people. As a person of faith, I am convinced that God wants each of us to be fulfilled, enjoy rewarding relationships, and grow into our full potential. Unresolved trauma can plummet you to the depths of despair—but you don’t need to stay there. God provides the strength, guidance, and peace to overcome your current heartache and regain joy. As Scripture assures us, And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast (1 Pet. 5:10).

In the pages ahead, we’ll take a hard look at a hard topic, and we’ll explore how trauma shakes the foundation of your life. More important, we’ll discuss how you can begin to pick up the pieces and move toward healing. Choosing hope will sustain you and strengthen you for the journey to come.

Today you might feel little hope that you can become emotionally, mentally, physically, and spiritually whole. But I encourage you to hold on to the slightest amount of hope. In time, you will find that the smallest seed of hope can blossom into confidence, optimism, and faith.

Your Personal

HEALING STEPS

Share your story. People who have experienced a traumatic event tend to feel isolated and alone in their pain. Fearing that no one else can relate, trauma survivors often keep their stories tucked away inside. The effects of trauma are magnified in isolation. Research shows that the symptoms of trauma are reduced when survivors connect with other people, but taking that first step and reaching out to someone can be difficult. Consider starting small by writing out your story. When you’re ready, share it with a trusted friend, church leader, or counselor.

Pray for God’s presence, and watch for ways that he shows up in your life. This is not just a one-time thing to check off your list. Not at all. Begin each day by asking God to reveal himself to you, and carry a notebook to record the many ways he does show up. He is present in our lives—we often are too distracted or unobservant to notice.

Engage the power of gratitude. What are the blessings, big and small, that bring you contentment and joy? What are you grateful for? Write them down and thank God for them. Do this sincerely and consistently, and you’ll soon realize that your burden is lifting, even a tiny amount.

Consider what you need to help you on your healing path, and make it happen. One of the key points in this chapter is that healing from trauma almost never happens by yourself. You need people supporting you. You need activities that strengthen you. Consistent pursuits—such as walking, volunteering, an exercise class—will enliven your spirit. Spiritual practices can invite God’s Spirit into your healing process. Today, take time to think about just one or two ways you can support yourself through the journey toward full wellness. And then take action to make it happen.

2

Hope amid Heartache

Trauma Happens to Nearly Everyone—and Healing Can Too

Watch the news on any given day, and you’ll see that traumatic experiences invade people’s lives with alarming frequency. A common thread runs through story after story:

The illnesses we can’t cure or treat.

Mass violence we can’t control.

Bitter political divisions we can’t seem to bridge.

Economic inequalities no one knows how to rectify.

The growing threat of natural disaster and environmental degradation.

The social and economic impact of lockdowns during the COVID-19 pandemic.

And on it goes.

Those are only some of what we might call our collective or communal sources of trauma—those that impact us all in one way or another. Yet many people are traumatized by events that, while they might occasionally make the newspaper, affect only themselves or just a handful of individuals. These are limited in scope but certainly not in the magnitude of the shock and pain they cause. They include:

Sudden illness or death in the family

Receiving a diagnosis of a life-threatening disease

Injury due to accidents

Loss of homes and property to disaster

Bullying at home, work, or school

Domestic violence and sexual abuse

Witnessing acts of violence or abuse

Job or small business loss

Bankruptcy or chronic economic hardship

Instances of personal betrayal, such as infidelity and unexpected divorce

The number of people who have experienced one or more of these traumatizing events in their lifetime is staggering. Perhaps you include yourself or someone you know in that unfortunate company. Using data on the prevalence of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in America as a guide, a stark picture emerges:

An estimated 70 percent of adults in the United States have experienced a traumatic event at least once in their lives, and up to 20 percent of these people go on to develop PTSD.

Roughly 5 percent of Americans—more than 13 million people—suffer from PTSD at any given time.

Approximately 8.7 percent of all adults—one in thirteen Americans—will develop PTSD during their lifetime.

About 3.6 percent of adults in the United States suffer from PTSD during the course of a year.

An estimated one out of nine women will develop PTSD at some time in their lives. Women are twice as likely as men to develop PTSD.1

In other words, trauma is a sad and all-too-common fact of life—and it often has a dramatic negative impact on personal and social well-being. In economic terms, trauma-related healthcare costs are difficult to estimate, but we can be confident the total reaches tens of billions of dollars annually. The uncertainty lies in accounting for the hidden cost of ineffective treatments based on misdiagnosis—because it is easy for caregivers to miss the true trauma-related source of a patient’s diverse symptoms.

Aside from the physical impacts of trauma that cause a person to seek medical care, other effects include:

Abuse of drugs or alcohol, typically to numb pain felt as a result of the traumatic event

Flashbacks of the event

Depression

Anxiety/panic