the laying on of hands

By ray brown

This book was initially birthed out of my personal Bible study as I contemplated the infilling and the baptism of the Holy Ghost. God's established preference or propensity, if you will, to employ the phenomenon of the laying on of hands for healing and for the impartation of the gift of the Holy Ghost has always intrigued me. Specifically, God's use of his chosen disciple from Damascus named Ananias to lay hands upon Saul of Tarsus so that he might receive his sight and be filled with the Holy Ghost has fascinated me since I was a young boy in Sunday school. The entire Road to Damascus narrative and the LORD Jesus Christ's singular (even dreadful) awe-inspiring appearance to the mean-spirited Pharisee Saul engaged and captivated me. This book addresses religious bigotry and the innate inescapable pride and prejudice and perceived spiritual superiority of sectarian indoctrination. Although I originally set out to study the dynamic wonder of God choosing to employ men to minister unto other men and his utilizing the laying on of hands to impart the infilling of the Holy Ghost, the emphasis of my study quickly and seamlessly transitioned from the importance of men to focus on the gift of God""the gift of God of himself, the gift of the Holy Ghost. God gives himself away in and by the comprehensive Christ""both the Father and the Son by the Holy Ghost. It is my desire to magnify the LORD Jesus Christ by focusing upon the purposeful evangelical outreach of God's love that the Father might be glorified in the Son. It concerns and distresses me that as a nation we have waned in our desire for more of God. Broadly, we have settled for gimmicks and questionable entertainment and have silently colluded with one another in spiritual compromise so that we can have more of what the world has. We have settled for shiny things and an unsustainable and unrealistic social acceptance rather than seeking God. (Broadly) we no longer wait upon God, or tarry for the gift of the Holy Ghost, or for the refreshing which would reignite us as viable, zealous, and then incendiary witnesses of the saving power of the LORD Jesus Christ to a lost and desperate, disillusioned world. Someone has to address our complacency and compromise without apology, and this book does just that. The inimitable marvel of the baptism of the Holy Spirit and incomparable personal encounter with the power of God can transform our entire life and character and attitude, resuscitate and rekindle our contemporary worldly conciliatory Christianity, and then progressively and resolutely develop us into the ardent disciples of Jesus Christ we were intended to be. This work endeavors to accurately and appropriately return the emphasis of the baptism of the Holy Ghost to God's evangelical perspective: "and ye shall be witnesses unto me" (Acts 1:8).

• Language: English
• Publisher: Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: May 6, 2020
• ISBN: 9781098026615

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the laying on of hands

ray d. brown

ISBN 978-1-0980-2660-8 (paperback)

ISBN 978-1-0980-2661-5 (digital)

Copyright © 2020 by ray d. brown

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods without the prior written permission of the publisher. For permission requests, solicit the publisher via the address below.

Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.

832 Park Avenue

Meadville, PA 16335

www.christianfaithpublishing.com

All scripture quotations are taken from the King James Version of the Bible.

Cover Art by Dylan Townsend

Printed in the United States of America

Table of Contents

Ananias and Saul of Tarsus

Ananias and Saul of Tarsus (cont’d)

witnesses unto me

this spake he of the Spirit

Have ye received the Holy Ghost since ye believed?

the gift of God

This book is dedicated to the glory and honor of the LORD Jesus Christ, and in memory of Mary Margaret Brown.

Other Books by ray d. brown

authority

not of the world

book 1

Ananias and Saul of Tarsus

And Ananias went his way, and entered into the house; and putting his hands on him, said, Brother Saul, the Lord, even Jesus, that appeared unto thee in the way as thou camest, hath sent me, that thou mightest receive thy sight, and be filled with the Holy Ghost.

—Acts 9:17

Naturally we must regress a little way even before our narrative begins. Necessity dictates that we examine the motivations and the frame of mind of this man, Saul, and the attitudes and convictions that drove him as he made havok of the church, entering into every house, and haling men and women committed them to prison (Acts 8:3).

Before we start out on the road to Damascus, we will take a layman’s view of the theological tenets and pharisaical training that incited this man Saul to such a virulent hatred of Christianity. Not being a theologian or formal religious scholar, I will hopefully be brief with the religious complexities of men. However, I am a friend of the Bridegroom. And I have the Spirit of the glorified Christ dwelling and abiding in the earthen vessel and temple of my spirit-man. He is God’s Witness in earth, and he has a voice. He is the eternal, immutable Word of God, and he still speaks. Moreover, within the orbit I occupy for the kingdom of my Father, I am predisposed and even preemptive to release him upon the page or in my daily commerce and communications by word and deed. To be a trustworthy servant and a faithful steward of the LORD’s grace I live; to be a son in whom the Father is well-pleased I aspire.

To be as unambiguous as possible, I have no formal training, but by the Spirit of God I scribe. For them like-minded I will add that necessity is laid upon me, and by greater grace the desires of my heart, also.

Let me say this for them that get it: I may not know much about Judaism, but the Holy Ghost of God has sure shown me some truths about religion. Indeed, and just being a parishioner in a contemporary congregation I have learned some acute lessons about self-righteousness and hypocrisy; by osmosis, you might say. Alas, as much as I may wish it were otherwise, I have also learned some things about my own self-serving religious affectations and emasculated forms of faith. However, for expedience sake, I will try to defer much of my testimony and personal experience concerning the multifarious religious forms we effect to save our lives for ourselves, while at the same time misappropriating the LORD’s grace to call ourselves Christians. Well, perhaps I can at least keep my comments at a minimum for now. While endeavoring to give the Holy Spirit the utmost autonomy to speak the mind of Christ upon the page, I will try not to become tedious interjecting my personal conclusions about contemporary, mainstream Christianity. But when I think about the peril in which my soul took its ease in the narcosis of our progressive modern compromise, it evokes strong feelings for all those still anesthetized and deluded within this casual, worldly conciliatory entity which we call contemporary Christianity. I’m just not sure how much it has to do with Christ, and how much it has to do with sustaining our love for the world and vainly attempting to assuage our conscience with an ineffectual form of faith; simply presenting as Christians, as it were, not really understanding what that entails, and what it does not. How to be a Christian and keep our sin is our fundamental predicament. There is no nice way to put it. But I will try to keep this narrative moving forward.

Saul of Tarsus was of the strictest sect of the Pharisees, having been educated at the feet of Gamaliel, as he put it (see Acts 22:3). He straightforwardly gives testimony to his past persecution of the Christian way with the same unsparing clarity that he gives witness to his conversion. But before we start out on the road to Damascus, let us, in a sense, try to understand the Pharisee’s virulent hatred and rejection of Jesus Christ. What were the tenets of their theology and religious training that contributed to such murderous thoughts and vitriolic intent to kill him? What were their beliefs and religious conclusions as a sect that incited such indignation and outrage, bordering on insanity, if I may say so? What emotions drove Saul of Tarsus as an individual Pharisee to make havoc of the Church, to perpetrate such mayhem and bedlam against the followers of Jesus Christ after he was risen from the dead? What internal (religious) lunacy would drive a person of one religious belief to pursue, imprison, and attempt to eradicate the persons of another religious persuasion?

Indeed, behold the incendiary insanity of religious affectation, the lie and the lethal response of the illusion of righteousness when indicted with the raw truth and real righteousness.

The complexities of Judaism astound, the inevitable self-serving determinations and skewed counsel of men interjected into any religion further dumbfounds. Most religion creates and then constrains a God in the same image and likeness that our own ignorance and worldly compromise are comfortable with.

Maybe I better clarify something as briefly as possible. If this book is going to offend, then let it offend now, and may no man’s reading be in vain. I do not write to wise men after the flesh, although God would have them emancipated from worldly counsel and religious bondage. Primarily I write unto the children.

Let me explain the concept and premise, and this I have of the LORD. If you think not, then inquire of him concerning me, and may the Holy Ghost favor you forthrightly with fresh breath and greater faith. Religions are as the kings of the earth who exact custom or tribute from their subjects; not of the children, but of strangers (Matt. 17:25). Let the ear of the learned be opened. Then are the children free (re Matt. 17:26).

A child’s understanding of the religious conclusions which constrained Saul of Tarsus upon the road to Damascus shall suffice. That Saul is convinced of his elitist religious superiority is evident. We will review all three accounts in the book of Acts that describe Saul’s encounter with the LORD Jesus on the road to Damascus: that written by Luke in Acts, chapter 9; Paul’s testimony to the Jews at Jerusalem in Acts, chapter 22; and Paul’s testimony of his conversion before King Agrippa in Acts, chapter 26.

Saul had already made havoc of the church in Jerusalem, evidently going house to house and dragging believers out into the street, and then into prison (Acts 8:3). God was not surprised by this persecution. It was allowed as part of his sovereign design to spread the gospel of Jesus Christ. Persecutors of God answer to God. Yes, God takes the persecution of his people personally. His Church is reckoned as his body, and as the bride (the betrothed) of his only begotten Son, Jesus Christ. Persecutors of God’s people, and oppressors of the truth of his Word, exist in the longsuffering and forbearance of the immeasurable mercy of God, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance (2 Pet. 3:9).

The times and the seasons are in his hand, and it is God who puts the sickle in at harvest. In the meantime, God uses the evil of men to advance his own purpose and designated ends. Saul’s havoc of the Church at Jerusalem resulted in the spread and prosperity of the gospel of Jesus Christ. For God so loved the world that he sowed a Living Word into the earth. The following scriptures that describe the scattering of the LORD’s disciples cause me to ponder the parable of the sower as written in Luke 8:11, where the disciples had asked Jesus to explain the parable. The LORD Jesus said, Now the parable is this: The seed is the Word of God (Luke 8:11).

The way the Holy Spirit ordered the apostle Luke’s thoughts as he wrote the following verses incites me to awe and wonder; and for those of us who will listen, the Spirit of this Living Word still speaks. Therefore they that were scattered abroad went everywhere preaching the Word. Then Philip went down to the city of Samaria, and preached Christ unto them (Acts 8:4–5). Luke calls it a great persecution against the church in Jerusalem, which had resulted in Stephen being stoned to death, and believers being scattered abroad throughout the regions of Judaea and Samaria (Acts 8:1).

The Holy Spirit immediately impresses upon me the divine analogy of the Word of God as the seed of the gospel of Jesus Christ being spread (scattered) by the means of preaching. Ah, and even the persecution of ignorant and misguided men played a part in its dissemination. And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose (Rom. 8:28).

With the exception of Philip, the apostles remained in Jerusalem during this great persecution (Acts 8:1), so them that were scattered abroad preaching the Word of God must have been other believers, or ordinary church-folk, you might say. Uh, well, don’t misunderstand me; perhaps not to be compared with contemporary church-folk, per se, since we do not predominantly have a viable witness, much less preach. Well? There’s not a more delicate way to say it. Please, let’s not ignore the elephant in the room; he’s sure to break something.

As it pleases God, he uses agricultural examples to draw an analogy between the physical, or natural, and the spiritual. In the Genesis of creation he is pleased to put it as follows: "And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed is in itself, upon the earth: and it was so" (Gen. 1:11, italics mine).

Jehovah God, whose name is Holy, who is the Alpha and Omega of time and eternity, and the Author and the Finisher of our faith, is pleased to parallel the preaching of the Word of God as the sowing of seed into the earth. The LORD Jesus, as the Word of God incarnate, puts it like this: Verily, verily, I say unto you, Except a corn of wheat fall into the ground and die, it abideth alone: but if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit (John 12:24). The LORD Jesus was contemplating Calvary and was expounding to his disciples by example the kingdom principle of losing one’s life to find it. He would be the exemplar of the immeasurable love of God. His life laid down is the seed, and every believer is the subsequent fruit of his death and resurrection whose seed is in itself. Here in John, chapter 12, preliminary to Gethsemane the LORD Jesus prays to the Father, Now is my soul troubled; and what shall I say? Father, save me from this hour: but for this cause (purpose) came I unto this hour. Father, glorify thy name (John 12:27–28).

Christian, we are the kingdom fruit "whose seed is in itself" (Genesis 1:11). We are meant to replicate that holy thing that is being birthed in us by our witness, or rather, by the witness which abides within us, the Holy Spirit of God. We know that God’s Word is emphatic and deliberate, purposeful that each believer would perpetuate the same saving faith by that same Word of God which saved our own soul. If so be that we have waited upon God as instructed, and tarried for the promise of the Father, if so be that we have been endued with power from on high as we Pentecostals purport and pontificate, and have been baptized with the Holy Ghost and fire, then why are we in general so lukewarm and indifferent not only about our own salvation but also about the salvation of a world still lost?

In the interests of moving this narrative forward and heading out with Saul of Tarsus upon the Road to Damascus, I will attempt to give a concise answer to my own question of why the ordinary, garden-variety, mainstream contemporary Christian has no viable witness of the resurrection and life that is in Christ Jesus. We have not effectively lost our own life to have it. We have not followed on to know the LORD in the power of his resurrection because we have neither fellowshipped with his sufferings, nor have we been conformed to the death of his cross (Phil. 3:10). On the left hand we have compromised and attenuated our faith to conform to our illicit love affair with the world, and on the right hand we do not live a life of obedience and sanctification which lends itself to a godly lifestyle.

God favors the godly. We have not because we are not. And we are not because we ask amiss, that we may consume it upon our lusts. I trust James will forgive me for taking liberties with the syntax of James 4:3; and not only forgive me, but heartily concur. The point I make is this: God is a Spirit (John 4:24), and he is a Holy Spirit. We cannot stand the flame. We have too much to lose.

We feign ignorance of the gravity of the conversation in the middle of John, chapter 12, and its grave implications for our religiosity. Verse 33 casts too much light and truth upon our covetousness and worldly compromise. This he said, signifying what death he should die. Christian, to not take up our cross and follow him makes of us spiritual malingerers and subsequent infidels, dry branches. It needs to be said. The tree can be magnificent in the eyes of worldly wisdom, copious and extravagant with foliage, prosperous, even ostentatious with leaves, and not one fig or olive.

God sowed the life of his only begotten Son into the earth as seed corn. If you and I are his elect progeny and the children of grace, then the truth of his expectation is that you and I are the perpetuation of that fruit WHOSE SEED IS IN ITSELF and the extension and continuity and outreach of that living sacrifice of the love of God in Jesus Christ for a world still lost. If so be that Christ is in us. And if not, then we are lost and undone.

If I have no viable, vocal, active witness for Jesus Christ within the orbit of my immediate influence, it behooves me to examine myself to see if, indeed, the witness of God, meaning the Holy Spirit of God, is abiding in the earthen vessel of my body and in the temple of my spirit-man. Otherwise I am deluded, and still living for myself as encouraged and aided and abetted by the god of this world.

Here is an observation and a consideration. The Church of God in Jerusalem was suffering a great persecution and Saul of Tarsus making havoc of it because Satan was threatened by its witness of the LORD Jesus Christ. They evidently were disseminating seed. They were spreading the gospel. They evidently were the fruit of his resurrection, fruit WHOSE SEED WAS IN ITSELF. Now the parable is this: The seed is the Word of God (Luke 8:11).

Without getting into a lengthy discourse about the Church then and the Church now, I am still compelled to reference the following about the Church in the Book of Acts, which culminated in Stephen’s indictment of the high priest of Judaism and the council of the Pharisees and giving the general history of the Jews rejecting God and killing his prophets. "And the LORD added to the Church daily such as should be saved" (Acts 2:47, italics mine).

There was an explosion of signs and wonders and miracles, and great multitudes being saved. The Church was such a threat, and Stephen in particular, that the assorted religious factions in the synagogue were forced to suborn false witnesses against him in their desperation to silence his Holy Ghost preaching. And the Word of God increased [spread]; and the number of the disciples multiplied in Jerusalem greatly; and a great number of the priests were obedient to the faith (Acts 6:7).

The Church was obviously growing rapidly. The exact number is debated by commentators, but Acts 4:4 puts the number of men at about five thousand. The total number would be much larger. What I find especially interesting is that it is recorded in Acts 6:7 that a great number of priests were obedient to the faith. This would have been naturally unsettling and further provocative to the high priest, Caiaphas, and to the Jewish council of the Sanhedrin. In a layman’s contemporary vernacular, I would have to say, Why, some of the preachers were getting saved! Ah, how the Church of God today, and all comprehensive Christianity, could benefit with revival breaking out among our preachers. Of course, like all revival, it would have to begin with repentance.

The high priest, Caiaphas, and the other priests in the upper echelon of Judaism would have regarded these other priests referenced in Acts 6:7 which believed on Jesus as defectors and traitors. They would have seen the fundamentals of Judaism being eroded by whom they considered to be an imposter. They clearly understood that Jesus had declared himself to be the Christ of God and that his followers fully accepted it also. Adding insult to injury, as they say, is that these Jews were convinced that this Jesus about whom it was being said, Behold, the world is gone after him (John 12:19), was not the Chosen One of God but was rather cursed of God, for he that is hanged is accursed of God (Deut. 21:23).

These beliefs neither excuse nor mitigate the malevolence and murderous bigotry of one class or color or creed of people directed toward another class or color or creed of people. I struggle to even suggest that Saul of Tarsus’ resolute beliefs help explain his unparalleled, intemperate orthodoxy, and rabid hatred of Christians. But I do see how that a personal pietism and persuasion of one’s own spiritual superiority and self-veneration can lend itself to a certain religious insanity. However, by retrospection and revelation, I see how that it is the truth of the Word of God (the person of God in Christ) that drives the hypocrite mad. Ah, indeed, when the religion of the self-righteous is revealed to have been a self-serving vanity it makes the hypocrite insane.

The truth that I cannot live with must by all means and any means be eradicated so that I can keep my religion and my self-righteousness intact. It is not only the quote/unquote sinner who will not come to the light lest his deeds should be reproved (exposed). The LORD Jesus was speaking to a very religious man (John 3:20). Indeed, church-folk think that it is exclusively for sinners that Light (Lit. the Light) has come into the world. We Christians feign ignorance and indignation at any suggestion we could be blind in some aspects, uh, or along some doctrinal lines, uh, or surreptitiously slipping in and out of the shadows and shady business of just a little sin. To Nicodemus’ credit, he did come to the Light. Whereas many of us will not seek out the Master by day or by night for an audience because we suspect we will be told some things we do not want to hear, meaning some truths we do not want to live by. If we will study the three appearances Nicodemus makes in the gospel of John, we see him progressively transformed by grace and truth into a disciple (John 3:21, 7:51, 19:39).

No, I am not a theologian; I do not have a degree. I am a Bible student and a poor scribe; a servant, a steward, a son of God. Above all things I am a sinner saved by grace, a bond-slave to mercy. Moreover, the same grace that saved me from sin is well able to keep me from sin. Christ is my righteousness. My righteousness follows inherently behind my grace. I do not have to check myself in the mirror to make sure I’m okay, to make sure I got my white-face on. Christ my righteousness takes care for these things. These are my credentials, and the preface of the following statement: Religious elitism and self-righteousness had made Saul of Tarsus murderous. There is no nice way to put it. Contemporary denominational intransigence and superiority is not quite on the same rancorous level, but we are still essentially implacable and unapproachable and intolerant of peoples of different religious beliefs. And I mean within the ranks of our different flavors of Christianity, you know, our religion, our varying feeble attempts to coerce God to conform to our specific bend of compromise and personal, preferred constraints.

Contemporary societal civility dictates that we can no longer stone and kill or have arrested those of different denominational persuasions, but some of us look forward to an impending change in that policy. We cannot legally have those who believe differently than we do killed, so we will just have to patiently endure until God sends them all to hell and our congregation of thirty or forty, or four hundred, is saved. You know precisely how we do it. Do not pretend otherwise. We have a mutually unspoken pact of no common camaraderie or communion. We may say hello if the occasion commands it, but the exchange of pleasantries or any type interdenominational fellowship with, well, them infidels is specifically forbidden.

Saul of Tarsus did not possess our contemporary compunction and constraint. Civility and tolerance were not in the vocabulary of his crusade, you might say. In his own words he would later say, And I persecuted this way [Way] unto the death, binding and delivering into prisons both men and women (Acts 22:4). We can only imagine the accompanying cruelty and inhumanity that this type of caustic bias precipitated. This is the same evil that gave birth to the religious fanaticism that crucified the Son of God; the untampered human potential for depravity confederate with Satan’s hatred for all that is holy. This evil is the very best of men’s religion coupled with hell’s preeminent hatred of the Holy One, men insisting upon their own way with God, and aligning themselves with the son of perdition to have it.

Phenomenal, the cacophony and dissonant outcry of the illusion, and the liar, when confronted with (the) unprocessed truth. It occurs to me that it is them in the deepest religious bondage and subjugation to sin that are the most acute and acrimonious haters of them which are free. Marvel not, my brethren, if the world hate you (1 John 3:13).

The great persecution of the early Church in Jerusalem of which we write resulted in believers being scattered like seed-corn preaching the Word of God. The scriptures say they were scattered everywhere preaching the Word, and that Philip went down to Samaria and preached Christ unto them (Acts 8:5). See here an example of them called according to God’s purpose, for there appears to have been a revival in the city of Samaria at the preaching of Philip which encompassed the entire city. And the people with one accord gave heed unto those things which Philip spake, hearing and seeing the miracles which he did (Acts 8:6). We hope to return and examine the spread of the gospel in Samaria when we look at the power of God which was upon the preaching of the apostle Philip, and as we later take a closer look at his individual ministry.

The scriptures do not say why Saul of Tarsus chose to go to Damascus, which is about one hundred and fifty miles from Jerusalem, instead of going to the city of Samaria, which is about one hundred and twenty miles away, to pursue and persecute Christians. These things are interesting to know when we are able to find them out with a minimal investment of searching, and not at the expense of study time better spent. Anything not specifically delineated by the Word of God is essentially supposition. We ponder these things for leisure. The Holy Spirit of God will show the intrepid and true all they need to know. Indeed, even as I wrote this, it occurred to me that it was most likely related to Saul’s political and religious affiliations in both Jerusalem and Damascus; you know, the good ole boy consortium down at the local synagogue, the religious syndicate, if you will. More deals may well be struck in the back room of the magistrate’s office than them that go across the front desk. As you can see, I have a good imagination. My personal experience with church-folk and small-town politics and shady, left-hand legalities cannot be discounted either. Notwithstanding amusing and saddening conjecture that too often proves to be true, it is safest to allow the Word of God to speak for himself. And the Holy Ghost is faithful to divide it unto personal application.

And Saul, yet breathing out threatenings and slaughter against the disciples of the LORD, went unto the high priest. And desired of him letters to Damascus to the synagogues, that if he found any of this way [Way], whether they were men or women, he might bring them bound unto Jerusalem. (Acts 9:1–2)

The members of the Church at Jerusalem were ALL SCATTERED except the apostles (Acts 8:1); all but Philip who was in the city of Samaria preaching Christ (Acts 8:5). It is reasoned by Bible scholars that the apostles were resolute to remain in Jerusalem as commanded by the LORD until they were unquestionably moved by God, that most likely it was a matter of faith. All the rest evidently thought it prudent to leave. Stephen had just been killed. The persecution was intense, it was house to house, and many may have been forced to leave hastily.

At the beginning of chapter 9, Saul is still breathing out threats and slaughter (murder). He had already consented unto the death of Stephen (Acts 8:1). Luke chronicled him at the scene of the crime. And the witnesses laid down their clothes at a young man’s feet, whose name was Saul (Acts 7:58). (Young) Christian, I don’t know about you, but I would not want this religious extremist coming after me, a man whose piety had obviously made him incendiary and violent. By contrast, in my Christian experience, I can obliquely understand Saul’s zeal. I have been guilty of intolerance, and what I term an intemperate zeal in the past, attempting to persuade mainstream Christianity and the obdurate, judgmental self-righteous congregation to accept and integrate (to love) the homeless and the mentally-ill and the addicted into the, uh, orthodox assembly; you know, especially if you have read more than a few pages of anything I have written, the conventional congregation of the Holy Brethren and the Sisters of Sanctity, what I term the righteous-right relegated to the wilderness of their religious presumptions and elitist self-seeking superficial sanctimonious posturing presentation (no commas please).

It is good to get that out there; that the heart and mind of Christ is that of a Shepherd following after his Father’s flock, and one is still lost. It is established. As long as the earth endures, ninety and nine will never be one hundred. Let us, therefore, cease and desist with the posing and the self-important pontification, and the presenting ourselves before the LORD, and before the honor one another, as if we were whole. That’s right, stop pretending you do not see them there, the least of these the LORD’s brethren subsisting on the margins of society where our self-righteous religious convictions have consigned them, unworthy of the Father’s favor. They are why he came, and why the Father sent him. They are the reason we gather, though we have turned it into a self-celebratory parade and compartmentalized performance. We delegate the witnessing to the evangelist, and preaching is the preacher’s purview. The check we write to the missionary we reckon as another finger on the hand of our painstakingly chronicled Christianity. It is no longer who we are but what we do: the minimally acceptable conscience-salving meticulously prescribed preordained payments that persuade us we are Christians, and we have the works to prove it. We are the Church. Never mind we are lukewarm and capricious by the most generous estimation. Please, let’s no one say anything. We have got the broad way of complacency and compromise tweaked concisely: the least amount of religious exercise and mutual collusion to promote the mass delusion of us being Christian. We are the saints of the status quo and will not tolerate anyone turning up the index of spiritual expectation. Please, let’s no one pray down any fire. I have said, we have too much to lose.

Is it any wonder though that the LORD Jesus wanted this guy Saul on his side, if I may say so, or put it quite like that? Although it was misdirected, his ardor and religious industry pointedly reveal our contemporary witness as feeble and embarrassing, if we even have one. One man appears to have been the catalyst for a city-wide movement, which was intense and impassioned enough to make havoc of the Church in all of Jerusalem and scatter its believers abroad throughout the regions of Judea and Samaria (Acts 8:1–3). We will see how that meeting Jesus changes everything. Shortly we want to look at how God chose one other man, Ananias, and through the phenomenon known as the laying on of hands, God not only healed Saul’s blindness but also filled him with the Holy Ghost.

But first, Saul of Tarsus is soliciting the high priest, who is accepted by Bible scholars to have been Caiaphas, for letters to Damascus to the synagogues to arrest believers in the Way, as Acts 9:2 refers to the followers of Christ. He would also have been given a letter of introduction, indeed, if one were even necessary. Saul would have known Caiaphas, probably quite well. Ananias told the LORD in Acts, chapter 9, that he had already heard of the evil that Saul had perpetrated against the Church and against Christians in Jerusalem. No doubt his reputation and fervor preceded him. The Jewish leaders in the synagogues of Damascus would have heard as much or more than Ananias. Evidently these letters to Damascus included arrest warrants for Christians, and Ananias was already aware that Saul had authority in Damascus from the chief priests there, as he told the LORD Jesus to bind all that call on thy name (Acts 9:14).

This man Saul had studied at the feet of Gamaliel. In fact, it is time we heard his credentials, and his ignominy and notoriety as well, in his own words. We have referenced most of what Luke wrote, which sheds light on Saul’s disposition before leaving Damascus, and we will return in time to Acts, chapter 9, for Luke’s initial description of Saul’s conversion. But now we will go, in turn, to the two times Paul gives his own testimony, once in Acts, chapter 22, and then in chapter 26. As we study, let us trust the Holy Spirit to demonstrate what reasoning the LORD himself has for what some folks have called redundancy in relaying the apostle Paul’s conversion on the road to Damascus. I assure you it is not. Nothing is wasted. Later, Paul further clarifies in his own words his thoughts and feelings concerning the Church of Jesus Christ and its early believers. He mentions situational detail that enhances our understanding of the enormity of his conversion. As Paul, we want to magnify Jesus Christ in the telling of it.

In Acts, chapter 21, evidently it was only the proximity of the Roman garrison stationed at the Antonia castle overlooking the temple courtyard that saved Paul’s life. We will speak more of this episode later. Chapter 22 begins with Paul’s testimony to a predominantly hostile Hebrew audience in Jerusalem which had intended to kill him for supposedly teaching against the people, the law, and the temple, and for defiling the temple by bringing Greeks (Gentiles) into sacred areas. Paul would soon be placed under arrest and taken before the Jewish council, but first he asked the chief captain who had saved him if he could address the crowd, and he gave his permission. Paul gave a rather lengthy testimony before the crowd erupted once more in tumult. Below are the verses that are pertinent to his disposition before leaving for Damascus.

I am verily a man which am a Jew, born in Tarsus, a city in Cilicia, yet brought up in this city at the feet of Gamaliel, and taught according to the perfect [strictest] manner of the law of the fathers, and was zealous toward God, as ye all are this day. And I persecuted this way [Way] unto the death, binding and delivering into prisons both men and women. As also the high priest doth bear me witness, and all the estate [council] of the elders: from whom also I received letters unto the brethren, and went to Damascus, to bring them which were there bound unto Jerusalem, for to be punished. (Acts 22:1–5)

Near the conclusion of this testimony, Paul adds the following comments to the LORD, which are relevant to our current discussion. Paul throughout the entire New Testament is never hesitant to indict his own past behavior.

And I said, LORD, they know that I imprisoned and beat in every synagogue them that believed on thee. And when the blood of thy martyr Stephen was shed, I also was standing by, and consenting unto his death, and kept the raiment of them that slew him. (Acts 22:19–20)

This may be a lot of scripture for some readers but it is practical and convenient to go ahead and add Paul’s comments to King Agrippa in chapter 26, which are applicable to our study and which reflect (at the time) Saul’s fiery sentiments and certifiable rage toward the early Church. This will give us a comprehensive, perhaps more cohesive perspective of Saul of Tarsus’ religious bondage and compulsive, consuming tyranny. What a morose, disconsolate, unhappy individual.

All the Jews which knew me from the beginning, if they would testify, that after the most straitest sect of our religion I lived a Pharisee. I verily thought myself, that I ought to do many things contrary to the name of Jesus of Nazareth. Which thing I also did in Jerusalem: and many of the saints did I shut up in prison, having received authority from the chief priests; and when they were put to death, I gave my voice [cast my vote] against them. And I punished them oft in every synagogue, and compelled them to blaspheme; and being exceedingly [enraged] mad against them, I persecuted them even unto strange [foreign] cities. I went to Damascus with authority and commission from the chief priests. (Acts 26:4–5, 9–12)

Wow, what an obsessive, uh, excessive, neurotic fellow. Kind of reminds me of, uh, well, me. As I mentioned earlier, I have been guilty of what I termed an intemperate zeal, although I have never been accused of being lukewarm. Notwithstanding, perhaps I do appear pathological and extreme when it comes to worldly compromise among God’s people. I am zealous for the name of Christ. En passant the apostle Paul concurs: Let every one that nameth the name of Christ depart from iniquity (2 Tim. 2:19). Yes, I’m old-fashioned like that. I think everyone who calls themselves a Christian ought to be one, to live as one, vis-à-vis stop sinning. No, I am not talking about sinless perfection or living above sin. I am simply suggesting, like the apostle Paul, we can at least depart from iniquity. You know, depart, as in, get up from there, or get out of there. There are occasions from which it behooves us to depart—don’t act as if you do not have any. In fact, many of us need to stop manufacturing occasions from which we must later depart. Duh.

I am obsessive about Christian compromise with carnal elements because I know it as the cancer in the body of Christ. I have been in a backslid state with my soul in grave peril, subsisting upon the precipice of an eternity in hell, but God was merciful unto me so I could write this book. The world is insatiable in its appetite for Christians, and progressively Christians in their appetites for the things of this world. If the god of this world cannot induce your apostasy, he will settle for your lukewarm status. Them that are infectious carriers of worldly conciliation are probably more valuable to him than outright backsliders. He probably prefers them in Sunday school endorsing and perpetuating worldly values and compromise, carnal, common-sense counsel instead of the austerity of the truth. Child of God, if it means our souls are secure, then let us not only be earnest, and ardent, but let us burn for Christ at both ends.

Saul of Tarsus would probably have been diagnosed as manic-depressive today. There is mania without depression, but his type mania would have most likely induced depressive episodes as well. No disrespect intended, but he probably wasn’t much fun to be around. As a matter of personal testimony, the LORD Jesus Christ healed me of what was diagnosed as bipolar disorder and set me free unto him. On a certain level I empathize or identify with Saul. On a lesser level of intensity, I personally experienced Saul’s imprisonment and subjugation to extreme emotions, specifically rage, but without a religious component. I didn’t hate Christians; it seems I primarily hated myself. What a life of desperation and loneliness Saul of Tarsus must have lived. Intense emotions tend to isolate an individual, and Saul was off the charts. No one wants to fellowship with you there on the edge of implosion and spontaneous self-emulation.

When Saul’s comments from all three accounts describing his state of mind when leaving for Damascus are compiled into one comprehensive account, they are disquieting, even ominous. Behold the cruel domination and inexorable oppression of religious indoctrination, its hatred seeking expression. The spiritually superior command someone inferior upon whom to heap contempt. Most saints could not exist without a sinner to contrast themselves with. May God forgive us and enlighten us. May he grant us a true revelation of grace. Saul of Tarsus is simply an extreme and extraordinary example of what is common in our contemporary Christianity on a more subdued and surreptitious scale. Sometimes hatred is most effectively obscured behind religious smiling faces.

Anything short of love and I have missed the point. When I judge my success by another person’s failure, I have labored in vain. We encourage sinners to want what we have and proceed to teach them the self-righteous tenets of our self-serving religion. We perpetuate the species. Our ignorance is not necessarily a willful one but a learned one. We pass on the religion of our misconceptions and presuppositions, often the same ones we inherited. We need a God we can comfortably live with, so we give him expectations like our own, we create him in our own image. Unfortunately, we don’t expect much of ourselves. No wonder he doesn’t mind our liberties and self-indulgences; we have reckoned him a God of compromise because we are a people which so easily capitulate.

If we knew who Jesus was, we wouldn’t be so quick to invite others to church to meet him. We would introduce them to him in their own homes, and in the workplace and in the market place. If once we knew who Jesus is, we could stop hating and persecuting the peoples of other religions.

Saul of Tarsus was one of the predominant religious figures of his time, the top of his class, a young man with unlimited religious potential to persecute people who believed differently than the indoctrination he had learned at the feet of Gamaliel. Saul of Tarsus was quickly becoming the religious proselyte and celebrated apprentice who would exceed his mentor to become the new standard. Saul was going to correct what Gamaliel had missed; he could go ahead and retire if he wanted to. I wonder if Saul stopped to consider that the only reason he was so enlightened and superior was because there was a young man that went before him that was also resolved to be not only the preeminent among his peers but also determined to exceed his teachers. Yeah, his name was Gamaliel.

Sometimes the best of us are just the new and concentrated formula on the market, the next fund drive, the next generation of the righteous-right resolved to eradicate sinners from our religion. And the residue we proselytize into twice the sons of perdition as ourselves.

Gamaliel and Saul had the books of Moses and the children of Israel in the wilderness for their example. They were not only indolent and unbelieving, but they were infidels who would not fight. They camped on this side of Jordan and cried. They had no zeal, no get-up-and-go. The sect of Pharisees to which Gamaliel and specifically Saul of Tarsus belonged seem to have, uh, overcompensated. These ole boys went as far to the right as they could get; they would stone you for the least provocation.

What about us contemporary Christianity? On the left hand we have leniency and liberty and license, and I mean just about any kind of lewd and licentious lifestyle is allowed under our adulterated misappropriation of grace as long as you go to church and say you’re sorry once a week, or every other week. And on the right hand we still hate them which disagree with us about something as fundamental as baptism. But today we have metaphorical stones. You can’t see them, but they are just as heavy.

God will show me who he is when I relinquish my religious convictions about him but relinquish them to only him. Children, God is a Spirit (John 4:24). Open the window. Open the door. Let’s take the lid off the mason jar we have kept him in, put down the butterfly net we have chased him with. Be still and let him blow over you. Be still and allow him to breathe for you. Be still in the consciousness that the kingdom of God is within you correlative to your sincere asking, seeking, knocking (Luke 17:21).

For him who is light and truth and holy love, I must first get honest.