ChronicToo: Shattered: Inspirational Stories to Restore the Soul

By Cornelius W. May

Scars. We all have them. Some are physical and others, emotional. We were injured in one way or another. Our physical scars are quite visible, but our emotional scars are not.

These internalized misfortunes remain with us, as if stored away below deck. Buried feelings, without warning, can be triggered and abruptly resurface at any time.

Please know, you are not alone. Each of us carries invisible wounds, and we may even cry invisible tears. I can identify and fully understand.

Unlike healing physical pain, there are no ointments or lotions to treat our fractured emotions. I guess that’s why we try to repress them inside. Yet the biblical psalmist said, “He restores my soul.” And that restoration is available to you and me. No pain has to be in vain.

Telling stories of God’s renewing strength through personal setbacks, trials, and adversity, I share what I believe to be enlivening pathways to lasting wholeness.

Join me in an adventure toward soothing our silent suffering and healing our hidden hurts. The body and soul are connected. By addressing one, the other is likewise affected. May God graciously touch those deep recesses of pain accumulated along life’s path. Hope awaits.

Cornelius W. May (Neal) holds a Doctor of Ministry degree from Ashland Theological Seminary and has served as a Senior Pastor for over forty years.

Neal attended Kent State University in the turbulent 1960s and earned a Bachelor of Fine Arts degree with a Minor in Education. As a seasoned minister, Dr. May has experienced the balance of both Spirit and Word, illumination and reason. He was founder and president of Hosanna Bible Training Center and instructor of Biblical Interpretation and Contemporary Preaching. In addition, he continues to serve as an adjunct professor for Ashland Seminary, where he has taught Small Group Ministry, Communication and Conflict in the Church, and Archaeology of the New Testament.

www.theredemptioncenter.church

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• Language: English
• Publisher: Christian Faith Publishing, Inc.
• Release date: Jun 21, 2022
• ISBN: 9781639618477

Book preview

Day 1

Wounded by Friends

There are few pains in life that equal the wounds created by those near and dear. Our closest friends can hurt us the most. Maybe it’s because we trust them, so they catch us unaware. Because we considered friendship, this apprised closeness, a safe zone, our guard is down. Consequently, we are hit full faced, blindsided with a blow that knocks us down, if not out of the game.

Recovery from such hurts can take a long, long time. We are never quite the same, and we don’t trust anyone. And I mean, anyone. Our wounds hold us captive. Who wants to live such a self-imposed sheltered life? I certainly don’t. Yet, as I have found, it may be necessary for a time. Healing is a process. Recovery takes time.

Relational hurt is a profound experience. These inflictions can be unintentional or intentional and come from parents, teachers, leaders, spouses, strangers, peers, friends, coworkers, or siblings. Experiences with people shape our lives positively and negatively. Most of the time, the pain is slight and short-lived. But sometimes, the harm done to our psyche can be catastrophic. With tainted memories, it makes it hard to attach, to develop friendships, for it diminishes self-worth. We don’t forget. Our brain won’t let us.

Emotional trauma, in varying degrees, is experienced by just about everyone. Disease, death, divorce, division, loss in all of its various forms, can be trying indeed. We try to cope the best we can, but disappointment is a strong competitor for our happiness.

Emotional hurt does not allow us to ignore our past experiences. If allowed to fester, an enjoyable existence is stolen. It is necessary to process the past while living in the present, moving forward in an attempt to shape a happy, whole, and secure future.

As if pulled from our modern world, stories throughout Holy Scripture reveal similar incidences as to what I have just described. Through the millennia, the human condition has not changed much.

Zechariah, the prophet in the other Testament, captures in a quotable clause much of our anguish. He writes:

What are those wounds in thy hands? Then he shall answer, Those with which I was wounded in the house of my friends.

This kind of pain registers deep within the soul of any individual. We identify immediately with Zechariah’s words, regardless of the situation that may have generated the incident.

When it comes to pain, the origin of it does not seem to matter that much. It is our experience with pain that joins us together as fellow sufferers, traveling on similar paths, to the same desired destination of wholeness.

Wounded in the house of my friends sounds much like what Jesus endured. He was deserted in the time of need, abandoned by companions and followers, shunned by those who were helped and healed just days earlier. All who suffer are in good company.

One of Jesus’ chosen twelve, a once loyal associate, was lured away by the shine of silver and the glitter of gold, and by the pride of titles and the thought of power. The name Judas will forever be identified with betrayal. Much of the same storyline can be repeated in the life of Saint Paul. Quite often, he was alone and deserted by those once considered close supporters.

Has a friend ever turned on you or made empty promises? And just when you needed them the most, they disappear into the distant crowd. Sometimes those friends become the voice of derision, speaking out against you. I hope not. But if so, then our scars are similar. Please continue.

When pain and hurt are inflicted upon us by those we counted close, we want to retaliate angrily. I have heard that vengeance is sweet, as if more pain will lessen what we already can barely endure. It would be counterproductive to fill our tanks of remorse to overflowing. Just wait and watch. We live in a moral universe. It’s self-correcting because God is at work.

The object of recovery is to diffuse and dispense what ails us. But just how is that done? When anger and sorrow are brewing, an alarm must be sounded. Either one of these powerful dynamics can be damaging to our character, if we are not careful. Both emotions, in extreme, can diminish our ability to reason and eliminate proper logic.

Anger makes us go outward, while sorrow makes us go inward. One emotion can take us too high, and the other emotion can take us too low. The danger lies in our outward aggression as much as our inward depression.

What if we went up-ward? Not outward or downward, but up-ward to God? If anybody understands rejection and sorrow, shame and disappointment, it is Jesus. The biblical record describes Jesus with these sensitive sentiments:

For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly [with confidence] to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

Prayer is an amazing experience. Simple words like Help me can bring about relief in rather mysterious ways. By reaching out to the One who can actually help us, we find more than relief—we find strength, we find comfort, we find help in our time of need.

By letting God, as the Great Physician, get involved with the wounds in our soul, it keeps us safe and secure, out of harm’s way, so to speak.

It may be necessary to create personal boundaries for protection from being hurt over and over. If one reenters unhealthy situations repeatedly, then our need for more assistance, preferably from licensed, trained professionals, is in order. Don’t be afraid. Get some guidance. It is not an action of weakness, but of courage and strength to address specific hurts. The long-term benefits will be well worth the effort and cost.

Boundaries are important for well-being. They must be respected, yours and the boundaries of others. Limit time with toxic individuals, or at least, keep a safe distance whenever possible. Make some new friends and acquaintances and don’t fully trust them until they have fully earned it.

Wellness and trust are regained in social situations, but only if they are safe. Feelings are fragile. Be careful where you put them and to whom you give them.

God is always involved in directing anyone toward well-being. When you don’t know what to do, choose health. Healthy decisions, over the unhealthy, are constructive choices that divert from destructive habits. When you live life out of healthy decisions, a healthier life you will live.

Choose health. Choose life. You’ll see. Read on…

Prayer of Release

Dear God of All Creation,

No one knows me better. You made me. You are aware of what’s going on inside of me, what others can’t see. I’m trusting You by opening up this inner space that I’ve worked so hard to keep closed.

I invite You into my heart and soul. Look around. The wounds, You can see. The scars are evident. My bruised personality, You behold. You get it. You