Cat and Dog Poems

By Caren Krutsinger

I am a poet, a cartoonist, a painter, an artist. I tend to write poems around themes. In the past five years I have written over twenty thousand poems, so I decided to put them into theme books. This book includes poems about my dogs and cats, which number past twenty, or imaginary dogs and cats, written for fun, out of my imagination. I must give my eclectic muse Trixie, credit for many of these outrageous poems.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lulu.com
• Release date: Dec 11, 2022
• ISBN: 9781387415540

Book preview

Dear Readers,

I love writing stories and poems. In five years I have written twenty thousand poems, and I thought I might have enough poems to create a book about dogs and cats, and boy, was I right! I have so many cat and dog poems it makes me laugh.

I am allergic to cats even though I have raised many – Peepers, Tommy, Frisky,  Panda, Mr Fluffy Pants, Munchkin, M.J. and Shark to name but a few. My dogs have included Happy, Go, Lucky, Blue, Spot, Dot.com, Barney, Nova, Queenie, Beauty, Chip, Dale, Egypt, Baby, Sophie Helen, and Buddy.

I am a seventy-year-young grandmother of ten. I hope that you enjoy these little cat and dog poems and stories at least half as much as I enjoyed writing them. 

Chapter One

The Cat Dragged Him in                                    3

RumbleVoice’s Hunt for a Bobcat to Love                  3

Shark Cat                                                4

You Can Keep Your Cats                                    4

Curious Cat Lands Owner in Hot Water                  4

Comes Alive with Cats                                    5

Heaven from my Catbird Seat                              5

Half a Cat                                                6

Top Cat the Stud of the Alley Cats                        7

Cat Dog Mouse Diamante                               7

The Cat who Cloned Herself                              8

Princes Pinja Was her Own Best Advocate                  8

Cats Do Not Know Much About Football                  9

Cat was her Excuse                                    9

Wily as a Cheshire Cat                                    10

The Young Cat Bride was Nervous                        10

The Cat Dragged Him in

Sam, my hunting tabby cat dragged him in and laid him on my bed.

He was a weird looking devil, and I thought he was completely dead.

I noted the shape of his body, and the scales on his back.

He looked like road kill, but he had a rather beautiful six-pack.

I revived him in ways I dare not put into a family poem.

I was shocked, frankly, that this almost deceased thing up and moaned.

Really truly thought he was dead until his eye open, turquoise blue.

It was a glimmering cat-like eye. Does an alligator not have two?

I nursed roadkill back to health in all kinds of fun, unhealthy ways.

Lots of kissing and hugging, and days full of sexy ornery sashays.

We are honey thick now, me and this magnificent alligator, Blue

A sweetheart, I told my inquisitive boss when she asked me what was new.

RumbleVoice’s Hunt for a Bobcat to Love

Sixteen hundred full moons ago, RumbleVoice, a giant with a mission, and his mighty spy hawk, Samuel P. were up in the Butter Cup Mountains hunting for a young wild bobcat to bring home to socialize, when Samuel P. started flying around in a circle, and began to caw wildly.  This was not Samuel P’s usual demeanor, as RumbleVoice had housed and clothed Samuel P. for at least eight hundred and twenty-seven full moons, and he had never heard Samuel P. caw except the time he accidentally left his steak out on the grill too long, and it had turned inedible, hard as a metal oven.

The bobcats came out of the mountains to gloat again, because they were fast of foot, and they were confident by now that they could not be contained by this cocky giant and his talon-laden pet.  After all, these two inept boobs had been trying to snatch up a bobcat for hundreds of moons, without success.

RumbleVoice and Samuel P. did not see the bobcats, as their eyes were fully on a wild, baby bobcat, all alone, in the wild, snoozing peacefully in a patted down bit of grass fluff.  No mom or dad around. Within seconds the bobcats who were much higher up on cliffs, spotted what the giant and his beastly bird had discovered, and they began to stir, arguing about whether or not they should do something. This was one of their own kind, a helpless baby. Many argued that this neonate should not be raised by a giant and a spy hawk.  What did they know about hunting, or masticating?

Shark Cat

gray hunter slurping

bloody head rolling on porch

shark's meatball sandwich

You Can Keep Your Cats

You can keep your cats and your dogs

I have a bunny love, and we are both readers.

You can keep your fish and your turtles.

We are lost in the love of each other, both leaders.

You can have your real world, it makes us both hiss.

Keep your politics, we love our heart-felt fantasy.

We are lost in a world of make believe bliss

We are happy and snug, and warm as can be.

My bunny and I, our books, and our window.

We stay inside snug, warming ourselves without fuss.

My bunny and I, best friends, loving each other so.

Your real ways and real things have nothing on us.

Curious Cat Lands Owner in Hot Water

Curious cat looked up her dress

Gentleman now in quite a mess

Comes Alive with Cats

Hippie-like, wearing flowered house dresses, she dances.

Adorned with calicos, and tabbies, she glides around her kitchen.

There is a lemon-smell to her; it is amazingly fresh.

Oatmeal too, and fresh Dove soap.

My nose likes sniffing her.

She comes alive when she is home with her cats.

A different person, someone who cares, open, honest, free.

When I want a raise I go to her home, and admire Fluffy, her favorite.

At work she is the boss, dressed in a suit, nothing open about her.

I read her proudly.

Heaven from my Catbird Seat

One criteria for heaven: Unconditional love for everyone

Not for only people who look like you

Or think like you

Not that there are any others.

Your religion, neighbors and family cannot help you now.

Guarantees you will get there: A loving heart

Joy in other’s accomplishments, integrity, standing up for others

Following the golden rule always, not just