A Gratitude Journal for Every Father: Gratitude Practitioner

By Gopi Nair

One of the easiest yet profound emotions one can share with others in their life is that of gratitude. The feeling of being grateful to another person for something, whether it be emotional support, the purchase of a product, or even the love they choose to share with you, is something everyone has done at one point or another. Yet it is also so

• Language: English
• Publisher: MainSpring Books
• Release date: Nov 11, 2022
• ISBN: 9781958434314

Gopi Nair

Gopi has been a Gratitude Practitioner, embarked on a mission to change lives for the better, by encouraging every one to practice Gratitude. Gopi is convinced that Gratitude is a magic wand capable of removing negativity from the shores of human mind! Devoid of negativity and its energy draining consequences, any one can realize his or her full potential. “Gratitude must be the only attitude in life” is Gopi’s mantra. He thinks Gratitude, speaks Gratitude and relentlessly does Deeds of Gratitude in every day life. We all can give the gift of Gratitude to others to enrich their lives along with ours! Gopi has been in sales for over four decades, and that gave him an opportunity to interact with thousands of people. He used his insight into emotional wisdom to navigate through the world of sales, successfully. While he was working with Metlife, he qualified three times for the prestigious Presidents Conference, and several times for the Million Dollar Round Table. During his career with Metlife, he trained several Agents in his capacity as a Manager. During the last twenty years Gopi has been a Mortgage Broker, and currently working with Guaranteed Rate as a Vice President, Mortgage Lending. Gopi has been a published author, having published Mental Science 101, Manage Your Mind Manage your Life, How I made 500000 in Sales at Age 69, and Tablets of Emotional Wisdom. His new book “Gopi’s Gratitude Journal” is slated to be published in August 2021. Gopi’s philosophy of life can be summarized in one sentence” “When you live for yourself, life is utterly miserable. When you live for others , it is pure joy”! Gopi had the privilege of being interviewed by Jack Canfield the famous author and the Creator of the Chicken Soup for the Soul, about his book Tablets of Emotional Wisdom. Gopi graduated from the University of Bombay with a Master’s degree in business. He migrated to the States almost half a century ago. He is an Inspirational Speaker, always willing and available to speak about the Power of Gratitude in changing lives. You can contact Gopi at 630-290-6847, or [e-mail].

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ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I am indeed grateful to my good friend Ms. Brenda Miller, author of Kid’s Code, and a brilliant Parenting Coach. I am humbled by Brenda’s generosity to invite me to write a parenting book with her under the Title FROM GRUMPY TO GRATEFUL slated to be released in this summer. It is my association with Brenda that gave me the courage to Write A Gratitude Journal for every Father.

I am immensely indebted to the wonderful team at Main Spring Books, who have consented to publish this book. My profound gratitude to Alex, Madysson, Bright, Rey and Jason without whose support and encouragement I could not have moved even a small needle in the publishing process.

I am eagerly looking forward to the new friends and a tribe of Gratitude Practitioners this book will create.

DEDICATION

This book is respectfully dedicated to all fathers of the world who work very hard day in and day out to make a difference in the lives of their children.

PART 1

Father Is An Inspiration!

Father is an Inspiration

A father may be an ordinary man,

Yet he can be an extraordinary dad!

He may not have all the money in the world,

Yet he could be there for you when you need him!

There is no sacrifice in becoming a father

Yet he needs to sacrifice everything to be a dad.

A dad is every son’s first known hero,

And a little daughter’s first known love!

A dad is mom’s best friend, and heavy lifter,

Always there to do whatever it takes to please.

Parenting is a joint venture between mom and dad,

To raise grateful children, to make a grateful world!

It takes a lot of sacrifices and sleepless nights to be a dad to your children. The little ones look up to you to navigate them through the unstable years of childhood. They need your strength when they are about to fall. They need your guidance to choose the direction when there are choices to make. They need you to lead, they need you to read, and they need you to discipline when they know not what they are doing.

Ten Tips for being a DAD

Understand that parenting is a work in progress. Parenting does not come with a manual because every child is unique.

Parenting provides on the job training. Learn as you go and grow.

Parenting is a joint venture between mom and dad. Please accommodate each other and be team players.

Always take a moment to reflect on the day you became a dad. In minute details, you can relive the ecstasy, the nervousness, and the indescribable joy.

The Practice of Gratitude can convert parenting pain into parenting joy. Regularly practice gratitude. When emotions run high, be quiet and remain grateful.

When situations seem to be getting too hard, whisper to yourself, This too shall pass.

Your sacrifices are a nutrient for a bright future for your children, never forget that!

Always seek help in parenting. Ask your old man to help you with any parenting questions. You can also consult your uncles or elders whom you admire for their parenting skills.

Rediscover your own strength and weaknesses. Unearth your weaknesses and correct them as a way of learning.

Grateful parenting can help your children to be grateful.

Are You a Role Model for your Children?

Every day every dad must ask this question. It will help you improve your parenting skills. Whatever habits that you want to see in your children, you need to cultivate them yourself. There is no substitute for lead by example. Your children are always watching you, and they will be subconsciously storing those images in them. So it is essential for you to be aware of this reality.

I experienced it myself when my son was four years old. I was taking him to his preschool in the morning. While in the car, he put a pencil in his mouth. What are you doing? I asked him. He said without hesitation, I am smoking. Why are you smoking? I asked again. Because you are smoking, came the answer. That day I decided to quit smoking, as I realized the harm I was causing to my son. Now, it is more than four decades, and I remember those days with regret.

The great Mahatma Gandhi was right when he said, Be the change that you want to see in the world. I will rephrase what the Mahatma said for better parenting. We need to change ourselves before we can see the change in our children. As parents, we do everything in our power to inculcate good habits in our children. We are basically sowing the seeds of great habits in them. In time, they will sprout and they will reap the harvest of good behavior in their own life. Of course, there are no guarantees in life, but as a parent we will feel that we did our best to give them a very good childhood experience.

My mother had her own philosophy of parenting. After my father died in my infancy, my mother had to raise six of us single-handedly. She did a wonderful job, and she was a very brave and pious woman. I often heard her talking to her young friends, Children belong to God. We do not own them. We have only custodial rights over our children. When they are to be released to the outer world, we need to pray to God: ‘God, these are your children. We did the best based on the light you showed us. Mistakes have been made in our parenting. Please forgive us and show them the way.’

My mother was a very God-fearing person, and our neighbors loved her all her life. Whenever they needed something, she was always there for them. I never saw anybody going empty-handed from our home. Maybe some rice, some money, or some delicious dish she made, Amma (as we lovingly called her) would definitely give to our neighboring friends. I clearly remember one day when I got upset with my mother. Generally, on any given day there would be at least three or four guests at lunchtime, whether it was somebody who was visiting my uncle for his advice or a distant relative stopping by for lunch. My mother always used to serve lunch to anyone showing up at lunchtime. That was our custom.

One day it so happened that after serving lunch to everyone, she sat down to have her lunch. Then, there was a cry from outside, Oh mother, my child has not eaten anything the entire day and is ill! My mother would take her lunch, and put it on a banana leaf, and give it to the neighbor. I, being the youngest, always hanging around my mother, asked her, Amma, why did you do that? You did not eat your lunch, and now you will be starving till dinnertime. I was really upset with her. She quietly told me, Gopi, remember one thing, if you eat food it will last twenty-four hours. But if you give it to somebody who is hungry, it will last a lifetime. Even though I did not quite get it, as I was only ten years old, it appeased my raging mind. Now, of course I understand what my kind mother meant. Amma was an epitome of compassion and kindness.

Confessions of an Amateur Father

I consider myself an amateur father, as I grew up without my father. My father died when I was a little less than two years old. He was only fifty years old, and he went for a pilgrimage to Sabari Malai, a very holy temple in Kerala. When he came back he developed pneumonia and he died of that. There was no hospital nearby, and he did not get timely medical help. So, I did not have any direct experience with my father, as I was too little, but my mother told me that he was a very sincere and honest man.

My older brothers all told me about their fantastic experience with my father. My oldest brother told me that my father’s friend had a restaurant three miles away from my mother’s home. Whenever they traveled to my father’s home, if they were hungry on the way after walking more than three miles or so, they could stop by at the restaurant and eat there. My father had given instructions to his friend to give food to my brothers, and the next time he went to the restaurant, he would pay the bill.

But as an inexperienced father growing up without a father, I have committed parental blunders. Fortunately, my children turned out to be responsible adults, thanks to Almighty God. But if I had to go back and start all over again, I would definitely do the following things:

Ask for help. Whenever you are a young father or mother, you can always ask for help to your own father, if he is around. You can seek help from your uncles and older brothers, or other friends whose parenting skills you respect. Maybe it is a cultural inhibition, but I did not discuss any of my parenting concerns with my friends or elders. Maybe I thought of the shame of asking for help. Whenever you need any help, you must ask for it, and in the same way, you need to extend your helping hand to others. I think the new generation does a better job of parenting than my generation.

Read about parenting on a regular basis, as parenting never stops. It is a work in progress. There are lots of resources available today on parenting. There are parenting coaches like my admirable friend, Brenda Miller, who does an incredible job of helping young parents to navigate through the uncharted territory of parenting. You can belong to a young parents’ club, and share the problems and possibilities of parenting. If there is no parenting club, you can start one in your community and invite parenting coaches to come and speak to your club about the art of