Heaven Shudders When A Godly Man Falls: Making Sense Of Betrayal In Ministry

By Kimberley Francine Ruanikar

The community of people most affected by the fall of a Christian leader are the ones closest to the Fallen. They are the dedicated group of family and friends that believe in the Fallen to the core of their being. Shocked and heartbroken by their leader’s fall, these Forgotten followers are usually left to bear their shame and grief alone.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Trilogy Christian Publishing
• Release date: Feb 18, 2020
• ISBN: 9781640884380

Book preview

Acknowledgements

Chuck Raunikar:

Your commitment to love and support your brother when he was alive remains admiral!

I am thankful for Eva Raunikar (1934–2018) who raised a godly son that attempted to change the world so its people would know God’s true character of love and grace.

To my late husband, Dr. Donald Raunikar (1959–2004):

Your love for Christ ignited in me a passion for Him that forever changed my life! Thank you for showing me the way!

I express my heartfelt gratitude to Dr. Ron Raunikar, who generously shared his extensive knowledge about the Raunikars and their Slovenian story.

Hugs and kisses to my gifted, talented, and awesome son, Jonathan Raunikar; thank you for helping me stay focused on why this project was important to finish.

Finally, I am forever grateful for my devoted and loving husband, Michael Boyer, who patiently read through each version of my manuscript and encouraged me every step of the way with gracious persistence that helped in making this story His best!

Preface

God’s story is powerful!

In my writing, I have made references to two groups of people that are very important within a fallen ministry. From the perspective of this text, the Fallen are male leaders in a Christian ministry who have consciously and deliberately made choices of moral compromise that have been exposed, disciplined, and removed from their position of leadership after being found guilty by a governing board. Additionally, the Forgotten ones of the Fallen in ministry are his followers and supporters behind the scenes who may have or may not have been aware of the Fallen’s indiscretions, but unconditionally loved and supported the Fallen through the ups and downs of his ministry despite his shortcomings. The Forgotten ones also include others who engaged with the Fallen either willingly or unwillingly in inappropriate relationships that may or may not have led to the Fallen’s downfall. From my experience with the Fallen, when they are exposed for lying, adultery, stealing, sexual perversion, or breaking the laws of man or God, the Forgotten are the ones who are left to privately pick up the pieces of a shattered ministry. Feeling betrayed, lost, angry, and surprised by the accusations and the consequences that follow, they become the Forgotten ones of a once thriving ministry, that was destroyed by a mix of their leader’s toxic belief system, poor choices and strongholds of various types of sin. Consequently, these betrayed supporters become guilty by association and the consequences that are administered to the Fallen leave a wide wake of turmoil for all involved to maneuver through. My son and I were among the Forgotten ones of Don Raunikar’s, fallen ministry, trapped within the churning waters of his sinking ship where we felt like we were drowning with no one to rescue or understand our innocent plight. At the time, I believed my life was sunk along with my husband’s, feeling the most raw and severe of emotions that I have ever experienced. The story that I share is one from my heart that is rooted in truth, great emotion, and a series of events that I had no control over. Unfortunately, some degree of the collapse of Don’s ministry was determined long ago, by a well-meaning family who were struggling to cope with raising their son who had a degenerative disability.

Interestingly, it was while writing this book that I realized this story of the Fallen and the Forgotten is not my story, nor Don’s story, but it is God’s story that He allowed to occur in our lives for His purposes. And, because this is God’s story, it is a moving story of God’s love, forgiveness, redemption, and grace for anyone who needs restoration and healing from betrayal. And because this is God’s story, my heart was changed, my hurts were healed, and my trust rebuilt to understand who God is in a more meaningful way. Therefore, because I have allowed God to mold and to make me into a more grace-filled person, I can more readily be used for His purpose to love the unlovable and forgive the unimaginable offenses of others. Many people are like the Forgotten who were left to sink on a ship that was built up in other’s minds to be unsinkable. White Star’s Titanic sunk in the North Atlantic Ocean in the early hours of April 15th 1912 when thousands died because of the irresponsible and reckless attitudes and choices of the architect, builders, and owners because they believed their creation was greater than God’s ability to prove them wrong. Just like with Don Raunikar and with many others who have fallen in their ministry, God will prove that He is the ultimate authority and creator in our world, not mere mortal men.

Despite his fallen status at the end of his life, Don Raunikar made a tremendous impact while he was on this Earth speaking truth into the lives of very many emotionally and spiritually wounded people. I can only speculate now as to why Don Raunikar was unable to have another chance to be restored in ministry and to continue his life, but he was not. God holds His secret to be revealed for another time. Even though my fallen late husband died of a broken heart after he was disciplined for his immoral behavior, I want the reader to understand the man he was when God anointed his ministry and who the man was that many loved and supported before his fall in ministry. He made an amazing impact on the Christian community during his time of obedient service to God, and I have included true stories of those people that his life touched through his various ministries, having disguised their identities so as not to impede upon their privacy.

My hope is that the true stories I’ve chosen to share about Don’s ministry will reveal to the reader how a person who is passionate for God to help people can also succumb to make sinful choices that can destroy their lives and the lives around them. I hope to shine a new light of understanding and compassion on the Fallen’s sin nature, for God’s Word says, everyone is vulnerable to sin and a measure of grace is given to all who stumble and fall in their sin. We are to forgive those who sin, as our Heavenly Father forgives us. Additionally, we have a responsibility to love all of God’s children and offer them grace; we are to love the ones we admire and the ones who have lost our trust. Also, we must not forget to love and care for the Forgotten followers, for they need encouragement to rebuild their trust and faith again so they can fulfill God’s plan for their lives. (Note: The stories presented in this text about former clients, friends, and acquaintances contain fictitious names to protect the privacy of those involved).

In God’s Love, may the peace of Christ be with you in the reading of His story, for heaven shudders when a godly man falls and the forgotten crumble.

Kimberley Francine Raunikar, M. Ed

Introduction

When someone does something wrong,

don’t forget about

all the things

they did right.

—Toby Mac, Contemporary Christian songwriter

There have been many tragic stories about Christian fallen leaders in the news media over the last few decades, and with the #MeToo and #ChurchToo movements bringing more Fallen to the surface for scrutiny, greater light is being shed on their stories that have been hidden in the archives of modern day church history. Now, more than ever, faithful people want to know the truth of these situations that have rocked the Christian faith-filled world. We want to know the why’s and how’s to gain greater insight into preventing these situations from reoccurring. However, before I begin sharing the true story of the modern-day rise and fall of my Fallen, I’d like to take the reader back to the biblical days of King David, pinpointing his illustrious affair with Bathsheba, a similar story of a much loved Fallen leader.

David’s is a story of an anointed man of God, known to be a man after God’s own heart, yet during a season, he lost focus of his responsibilities to the people of his kingdom, his family, himself, and most importantly, God. During the springtime, when David should have responsibly been leading his generals and soldiers at war, boredom most likely settled within his palace walls, so he began seeking something to peak his interests. Late one night, his wandering eyes coveted the figure of a nearby bathing beauty, capturing his lustful soul. This beauty was the wife of one of his devoted and dedicated soldiers, and by God’s law unavailable to David. However, David, being a romantic and a powerful king, decided to covertly steal Uriah’s wife for his own pleasure for the night. And after completing his arrogant escapade, David was informed that Bathsheba was pregnant with his child. Quickly, David developed a poorly designed cover-up scheme for his scandal. However, when Uriah didn’t cooperate with the deceptive plan, David became more ruthless, which led to the husband’s well-plotted murder. David believed his plan would allow him to marry Bathsheba without consequence to his sin. However, God did not allow David to get away with his shady and scandalous behavior without consequences.

Nathan, David’s advisor, was carefully watching David perform his schemes against God and man, and one day confronted his deceitful and lustful actions of betrayal and murder. Shaken back to reality by Nathan’s truthful confrontation, David overwhelmingly felt its conviction and wholeheartedly asked for God’s forgiveness for his sinful behavior. However, even though David fully repented for his sin, he was also fully held responsible for suffering through its consequences. Unfortunately, Bathsheba and her son also suffered God’s consequences for David’s sin. The baby conceived in adultery died as a result of David’s disobedience, and the couple grieved their unimaginable loss. This anointed but Fallen leader was not obedient to God’s laws, causing his family to suffer great hardship. The unrighteous path that David decided to take one season in his life that took him down a dark path of destruction is the similar path of many modern day Fallen leaders. What we do in secret is never a secret to God (Ps. 44:21, NASB) and the consequences of secret sin are always greater when we have been given the gift to lead and inspire the souls of others for Christ (Matt. 18:6, NASB). God says He will not be mocked (Gal. 6:7–8, NASB), and He will allow our sin to be exposed in His time, in His manner, and for His purpose.

Stories of fallen Christian leaders are tragic and heartbreaking to those directly involved as well as to the Christian community at large. Most fallen leaders at some time along their path in ministry temporarily forget about their commitment to serve their one true God, because of their toxic beliefs, and sins of selfishness, lust, pride, and/or greed, and any character deficits that existed prior to their ministry. The result of their sin is always certain, that they leave a trail of destruction behind them with angry and hurt followers who feel betrayed by their leader, friend, or husband who are the Forgotten followers of the Fallen.

When a Fallen has been exposed, often our initial response is to rush quickly to judge them and their families. Depending on how our belief system measures the sin they committed, we may want to see a harsh judgment imposed against the Fallen. We may believe the Fallen be no longer referenced as men of faith, and whatever heroic acts or spiritual contributions that resulted from their ministry be trashed. However, I believe these judgments against the Fallen be filtered through Our Heavenly Father’s perspective and Our Heavenly Father’s measure of consequence be given, not our own measure that is deficient of grace. In our humanity, our unrighteous anger and judgment most likely do not represent the love, forgiveness, and grace for wrongdoing for which Jesus came to Earth and demonstrated to those that were considered fallen. However, as we begin to look at the sins of others through the lens of Our Heavenly Father’s love, we might see our own reflection of sinfulness, which can be difficult to accept. The toxicity of our own faith has the potential to be just as toxic as the Fallen, and when we allow ourselves to face the truth of our own sinfulness and forgive ourselves, we can more easily forgive and love others who have sinned against us. Self-reflection comingled with Our Heavenly Father’s power of forgiveness will develop in us a more loving heart and a closer relationship with Him and others.

Additionally, the Forgotten followers of the Fallen are usually unfairly included in the harsh judgment that is offered. Many times, they are rejected, despised, and exiled along with the Fallen as if they committed the Fallen’s crimes. However, it is more often that when the crimes were committed by the Fallen, the Forgotten followers knew nothing about the Fallen’s crimes, nor did they coerce them to commit the acts. The Forgotten followers are mostly innocent victims that take on the shame of the Fallen’s action, and who feel compelled to constantly defend themselves as they suffer the consequences of their loved one’s actions…

For those that believe they must harbor resentment and must dismiss all the good contributed by the Fallen, then I persuade you to consider the many great men of the Bible who sinned against God and man. Should their stories of Our Heavenly Father’s forgiveness and redemption be erased from the Bible’s pages for men such as Adam, Abraham, Jacob, Joseph, Moses, King Saul, and King David? These men made sinful choices in their lives that caused their followers, friends, and family to suffer for generations to come. Yet I am thankful Our Heavenly Father allowed their names to be a part of God’s story to carry on through the ages because their life stories contain meaningful examples of Our Heavenly Father’s grace and love for us to understand God’s character in a deeper way. Our Heavenly Father loves us despite the failures in our lives. He forgives us when we fall. He does not reject us or leave us alone and discarded when we make poor and sinful choices. Furthermore, when we fail, God continues to pursue us and bring us to repentance just like He did with King David—a man after God’s heart—after his affair with Bathsheba. When King David came to his senses regarding his sins and accepted the consequences for his sins, Our Heavenly Father allowed David and Bathsheba to have other children such as Solomon who lived to be the wisest man that ever lived. He wrote Proverbs and Ecclesiastes, some of the most profound and wise books of the Bible today. What if people wrote off King David after his affair with Bathsheba as never being able to produce anything acceptable for Our Heavenly Father again? Is this how the love, forgiveness, and grace of Our Heavenly Father works when man confesses his sin and repents? O believe most definitely not!

Each Fallen’s story is most always unique with stellar beginnings and tearful endings. And, it is from my own experience as a Forgotten follower of a Fallen that I would like to share my late husband’s story, Dr. Donald Raunikar, while thoughtfully supplementing his story of God’s anointing with how he helped many others heal from sin in their lives. I also want the reader to understand the strong character traits that existed in Don’s family that made Don who he was as