60 Days of Disconnect - A Personal Perspective of How Social Media Affects Mental Health

By Keegan W. Lee and Bilal Ghandour Ph.D.

In the midst of the COVID-19 pandemic, 16-year-old Keegan Lee reflects on her cathartic decision to delete social media for 60 days and journal the experience through her thoughts, feelings, and emotions. A psychological perspective written by Dr. Bilal Ghandour, follows Keegan's personal journey to explain the causes and deeper meaning behind h

• Language: English
• Publisher: Keegan Lee
• Release date: Sep 15, 2022
• ISBN: 9781631030901

Book preview

60 Days of Disconnect

A Personal Perspective of How Social Media Affects Mental Health

KEEGAN W. LEE

& BILAL M. GHANDOUR, PH.D.

Copyright © 2022 Keegan W. Lee & Bilal M. Ghandour, Ph.D.

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

To my mother Charmin, my father Will, and my sister Kohen: Thank you for making this book a reality and giving me unconditional love and support. I love you beyond measure.

-Keegan Lee

To my wife Geena, my son Ramy and my brother Aboudy. I am eternally grateful to you all for your unwavering care and support. Your love is the fuel that drives my motivation to work and play.

-Bilal Ghandour

Table of Contents

Introduction

Journal 1 – There’s Beauty in New Beginnings

Journal 2 – A New Perspective

Journal 3 – In Sight, In Mind

Journal 4 – New Emotions, Thoughts, and Intentions

Journal 5 – Re-Evaluating Social Connection

Journal 6 – Euphoria

Journal 7 – The Striking Heron

Journal 8 – Open Eyes, Clean Mind, Inspired Heart

Journal 9 – The Power of Parents

Journal 10 – Experiment Within an Experiment

Journal 11 – Out of Sight Out of Mind? FALSE

Journal 12 – Know Your Worth

Journal 13 – Silence Is Loud

Journal 14 – Think Before You Act

Journal 15 – Embrace All the Emotions - Even the Negative Ones

Journal 16 – The Meaning of Human Connection

Journal 17 – A Bright Future

Journal 18 – The Science Behind the Screen

Journal 19 – It Didn’t Start with The Pandemic

Journal 20 – No Desire

Journal 21 – Maintenance

Key Takeaways from The Journey

For Parents

Important Information

Social Media’s Effect on Emotional Intelligence

Words Of Wisdom

Epilogue

Acknowledgments

About The Authors

January 2020

Introduction

During the pandemic, I had become more aware of my own mental health as well as that of others. As I was evaluating generalized influencers and aggravators for anxiety and mental illness, social media was a big factor for a multitude of reasons. First, the anxiety that arises out of wondering if someone will respond and how much time it took them to respond. Second, checking social media in need of self-reassurance and worth. Third, the constant comparison of my life journey to the highlights of others’ lives. Fourth, feeling as if I had to frequently post about my own life to demonstrate that my life was as perfect as everyone else. And finally, consistently associating likes and notifications with my value and self-worth. These are all factors that contributed to my anxiety, and I knew the stress social media caused me did not create the foundation for a successful and productive life I envisioned for my future. So, I decided to make a change. I disconnected from social media.

As humans, we are naturally social creatures. Society has evolved beautifully in creating technology to help us communicate, influence, and understand what is occurring in the world around us. It is efficient, quick, and simple to use. As social creatures, we have learned to rely on social media and technology to communicate, feel connected and experience a sense of belonging and community.

I have had social media for as long as I have had a phone, which has been three years. I did not become aware of how it was affecting my well-being until my sophomore year of high school. I was just like many other teenagers, constantly posting and using social media as my main source of interaction with people. I was trapped. It was as if I was constantly wearing a blindfold because of how much social media and technology altered my perception of reality. When I finally realized my mental health was being drained -my use of time was unproductive and inefficient, and my interactions with my family and friends were diminished because of my screen time -I knew I needed to do something to change my life.

As a teenager, I need and want social interaction just like any other age. Realizing my socialization was already limited because of COVID-19, deleting social media seemed irrational. However, knowing the effects of how it was making me feel, I decided I was going to treat the experiment as a short break to record the positives and negatives of my time away from social media. I thought it would allow me to gain clarity on how technology was affecting me and hopefully gain some new realizations and philosophies about life itself. I remember being scared, nervous, and excited before deleting social media. However, looking back, it was entirely worth it.

The following dates are recorded in real-time with real feelings, thoughts, and ideas as I navigated an experiment of deleting social media for 60 days during the pandemic. My goal for the experiment was to create tactics and methods on how to use social media and technology in a more positive, responsible, and less time-consuming way. My entries are followed by an in-depth psychological perspective that explains my behaviors and mental processes written by Dr. Bilal Ghandour.

January 1, 2021

There’s Beauty in New Beginnings

Today is the start of my social media cleanse. I am feeling an assortment of different emotions. I am excited to experience this journey and the benefits it has to offer, but I am also nervous about the unexpected. I figured it was the right thing to post my absence from social media on social media. I thought it was right to put some communication out there so people were aware. I struggled with posting this, though. I was afraid of what others would think because of how prominent social media is in our lives. I was worried about losing connections with people, and even thought that people would not care that I was gone. I was so worried about the perception of others I was blinded by the purpose of the entire experiment. So, I sat down with my parents and discussed my worry. I told them I was worried about what others would think of my absence, if they even cared, and who would reach out. They told me the right ones will. True friends will reach out, because they are the ones who genuinely care. And then, I realized my very first lesson of the experiment. I realized that I would find my true, genuine relationships with people during my time away. Sometimes we get so distracted by the amount of attention and validation we receive from social media that we forget about how genuine those connections are. There are many fake realities on social media, and this includes superficial friendships. I had the tendency to associate so much worth and value with the connections on social media that I let that override the more important interactions I had with people in person. I hoped that during this experiment, I would find the true meaning of human connection.

* * *

Response:¹ Perhaps more than any other business establishments, fitness centers understand the psychology of new year’s resolutions. They realize many of us have a desire to self-improve in periods where there is a clear cut-off (e.g., when returning from vacation, when the week starts, when the school year is done, etc.). The main rationale behind such human behavior lies in the apparent simplicity of the action: I can forget about the past and start fresh. This makes us avoid