Reclaim Your Self

By Jessica LaMarre

Overwhelmed, overworked, and burned out? As a working mom, Jessica LaMarre knew those feelings all too well. To the outside world, she had it all, but inside she was feeling empty until she found the key to unlock what was missing from her life.
Reclaim Your Self draws upon LaMarre’s personal experiences to give you everything you need to embark upon your own journey of self-discovery. This book contains:
· Proven techniques to build your self-esteem and release limiting beliefs
· Thought-provoking prompts to dig deep into what’s been holding you back so you can enjoy the life you want
· Inspirational activities to support you to step into your power and embrace the incredible person you were born to be
· A Three-Step Rediscovery Process so you can overcome guilt, self-criticism, stress, and intrusive thoughts and start feeling like yourself again.
If you’ve been questioning who you are and what you want out of life, Reclaim Your Self will help you find the answers you need.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Jessica LaMarre
• Release date: Sep 17, 2022
• ISBN: 9798986661711

Jessica LaMarre

Jessica LaMarre received her degree in electrical engineering and spent 15 years in technology in corporate America. As Jessica’s ambition for personal transformation grew, so did her career. Jessica leverages the knowledge, wisdom, and insight gained through Southwest Institute of Healing Arts, Delphi University, and other educational resources, as well as her experience as a Reiki Master and Intuitive Guide. Guided by her unique gifts she empowers others to access personal transformation from the inside out through her speaking, writing, workshops, and programs. Jessica has also served as a Mindfulness Program facilitator and on the leadership team for the Wellness Employee Resource Group (ERG) to support the mental, physical, and emotional well-being of employees at a large multi-billion-dollar technology corporation. Her publications can be found in Thrive Global, Medium, and ForbesWomen.Jessica loves personal growth and founded Love Personal Growth®, LLC. Jessica and Wayne have three kids and two dogs. She lives in Tempe, Arizona, and loves being with family, reading, healing, and continuing her education to expand her mind, body, and soul. She can be found meditating, writing, speaking, facilitating workshops, or playing tag with her kids, although they are getting too fast for her now. Her true passion is reconnecting others to their Self, which inspired her book Reclaim Your Self.

Book preview

Love Personal Growth®

Love Personal Growth, LLC

Tempe, AZ 85284

Copyright © 2022 Jessica LaMarre

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form without prior written consent from the author, except in the case of quotations in reviews and as permitted by the U.S. copyright law.

I have shared my personal experiences to the best of my recollection, some names have been changed to protect their identity. The practical tools provided in this book are for educational and informational purposes only and solely as a self-help tool for your own use. The information provided is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice. Your success depends primarily on your own effort, motivation, commitment, and follow-through. It is understood that the author and Love Personal Growth, LLC are not responsible for your results and are exempt from any, and all responsibilities, warranties, and liabilities.

Paperback ISBN: 979-8-9866617-0-4

E-book ISBN: 979-8-9866617-1-1

Audiobook ISBN: 979-8-9866617-2-8

Library of Congress Catalog Number: 2022914288

First paperback September 2022

Printed in the United States of America

Cover By: Valerie Derbaudrenghien

Edited by: Alexia Paul and Tammy Black

Published by Love Personal Growth, LLC

www.reclaimyourself.love

www.lovepersonalgrowth.com

DEDICATION

This book is dedicated to all the mothers that came before me, the current mothers, and all the mothers that will be. May you unlock the peace, joy, and happiness you’ve longed for, and may you reclaim your soul, right here, within you.

And to all the children who have made us mothers, may you know the love and light that you are.

Thank you for being our greatest teachers.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Introduction

PART I: What I Thought I Wanted

Chapter 1: A Day in the Life of a Workaholic

Chapter 2: Who I Had to Be

Chapter 3: Welcome to Corporate America

Chapter 4: Love and Expectations

Chapter 5: A New Family

Chapter 6: Losing Myself

Chapter 7: The Call That Changed Everything

Chapter 8: The Miracle

PART II: My Healing Journey

Chapter 9: Coming Back to Myself

Chapter 10: Navigating Our Emotions

Chapter 11: Calling Ourselves Back to the Divine

Chapter 12: The Power of Our Thoughts

Chapter 13: A Deeper Path to Healing

PART III: Your Healing Journey

Chapter 14: The 3-Step Rediscovery Process

Chapter 15: The 3-Step Rediscovery Process (Internal)

3-Step Rediscovery Process for Stress

3-Step Rediscovery Process for Allowing Our Emotions to Flow

3-Step Rediscovery Process for Transforming Our Thoughts

3-Step Rediscovery Process for Releasing Guilt

3-Step Rediscovery Process for Boundaries

3-Step Rediscovery Process for Self-Criticism

Chapter 16: The 3-Step Rediscovery Process (External)

3-Step Rediscovery Process for Judgment, Gossip, & Complaining

3-Step Rediscovery Process for Perfectionism and Control

3-Step Rediscovery Process for Overworking

Chapter 17: Concluding Thoughts

Acknowledgments

References

About the Author

Endnotes

INTRODUCTION

April 2022

Every morning as I wake up with three little kids in my bed—yes, all three—I smile. So grateful for another day, so grateful to have this life filled with love, blessings, and healing. So grateful for my three little children, dedicated husband, supportive family, and the spiritual guidance I have within and around me. As I shut off my alarm, I crawl over my daughter and get out of bed. It’s five-thirty in the morning. The coveted me time, the hour by myself each morning before the kids wake up and start their mom requests. I walk fifteen feet from my bed to my closet, where my altar is set up. The candlelight and music, or guided meditations set me up for a more peaceful day.

Feeling ready for the day, I walk out of the closet, sing songs, or cuddle the kids to a waking state. I guide my daughters, Blake, and Harper, through the morning routine while their little brother, the sweetest boy in the whole world, asks for hugs or tells me how much he loves me. We gather the water bottles, snacks, and shoes prepared the night before so we can get to school at 7:05 am. Rhett and I get home around 7:10, and I start my day—writing, cleaning, creating content, whatever I feel like doing, since quitting my corporate career.

My husband Wayne is absent from the morning routine. That’s because he is already at work. Wayne is the wrestling and track star I met at seventeen, the hard worker I slept with at eighteen, the rebel I was engaged to at twenty-two, the partier I married at twenty-four, the guy I almost divorced at twenty-six, and the one I left at thirty-five. He is now the man I choose to live my life with, the one who chooses us daily instead of alcohol.

***

January 2022

Home after a baby shower, I enter a remodeled garage that Wayne had just completed, walk through the newly renovated laundry room he made for me, and then into the large open kitchen. This hard-working man is cleaning the countertops, and my kids are emptying the dishwasher. This is the scene where the angels come in and sing that high-pitched aaaaaaahhhhhhhh. A miraculous vision of beauty that every mom would love to come home to. This angelic scene is not something new or unique; this is multiple times a week. The kids were ready for their kickball tournament, and there was a small cooler packed with snacks, waters, and kombucha for me—I love kombucha. We drove the quarter of a mile to the kids’ school for the tournament and enjoyed a beautiful 68-degree January sunny day. On Sunday, we decided to explore Arizona and went to Canyon Lake to play in the water, a fun family experience in which the kids packed snacks. ;)

This experience of my husband and kids helping more with the dishes and cleaning, my husband spending more time with the kids by himself so I can have alone time, and our relationship being better than ever is all new. The man who said he would never go to therapy attends monthly healing sessions with me, sharing how we feel and offering a deeper emotional and intimate connection. It is a far cry from where we were months and years before.

We both wanted things to be different in our relationship and in our lives. I wanted to feel more appreciated, supported, and loved. I wanted a husband who didn’t drink and helped more with the kids and around the inside of the house. He wanted to feel more loved, have more open communication, and, of course, more intimacy. Yet, for so long, we were stuck in this place of falling back into old patterns we learned in childhood.

That was until a difficult pregnancy changed everything and inspired me to begin my healing journey. This journey led me back to my Self. This journey gave me the courage to write this book, the courage to share the not-so-good times, and the courage to share the really hard times. The courage to share that in 2017, my life wasn’t what I wanted it to be, not even close. On November 1, 2021, I walked away from my marriage so it could be the one it is today. And in January of 2022, I said goodbye to my corporate career so I could focus on my life’s purpose. This healing journey has given me the courage to believe in myself and to create a loving, compassionate relationship with the most important person in my life: my Self, also known as my soul. And I hope it gives you the courage to heal your relationship with yourself so you can finally live the life you want.

This book is written for you, the busy mom. As I write this book, know I poured my heart and soul into these words.

Welcome, come in…

I see you, the busy mom. You who busts her butt at work; you, doing everything at home—most of the time all on your own; feeling unappreciated and unsupported. The one who gets asked for yet another thing after the first four hundred requests and then snaps. You don’t want to snap at your kids, but then you do and feel guilty and shamed by the inside and the outside world. You just want help from your partner and have asked so many times that this time you must yell yet again. You feel like you are giving all of yourself to everyone else, and at the end of the day, there is nothing left to give. You have done everything you’re supposed to do yet still feel like something is missing. You continue to push yourself to achieve, to do more because you like to be in control and have been called a Type A and overachiever more than once.

I know your struggles because I was you, and sometimes I still am.

I hear your self-criticism, the words you speak to yourself but would never say to anyone else—the negative self-talk about your body, your work, how you parent, and about your life. I feel your pain. The pain you have pushed down with every I’m fine; I’m okay; I’m good. The hurt you won’t let anyone else see because we must be strong. The tears that were never shed. The pain, hurt, and sadness covered up by frustration, irritation, and anger. You hear your body yell at you to slow down through your muscle tightness, stomach aches, headaches, jaw clenching, shoulder pain, and sickness. But you continue to push through, ignoring yourself.

I hear your words because these words were mine, and sometimes they still are.

I know your fears of not wanting to disappoint anyone, especially in your career and family. You who would disappoint yourself repeatedly to keep others happy; you who believe that other people’s happiness, their feelings, are your responsibility. I know your fear of not working hard enough, not achieving enough, not getting the next raise or praise, so you work even harder. I know the fear of being too hard on your kids, that you are yelling too much, and that the next big fight with your partner could be your last. The fear that someone may find out this life you are living, this life you said you wanted, is, in fact, not what you expected. Deep down, you are suppressing how you truly feel—the fear of what would happen if you decided to change.

I know your fears because they were mine, and sometimes they still are.

I know the guilt stacked miles high and compounded by being a working mom. I know the guilt you feel as a mom who wants to be with her kids but also feels the need to work. I know the guilt you feel as a career woman who wants to work but feels the need to be with her kids. You feel guilty when you do anything for yourself. You are the one who feels obligated to do the things on her to-do list. You have become short with your words; you are the one who has resentment in her heart from not feeling heard, understood, appreciated, or supported. You just want a break.

I know your guilt because I was you, and sometimes I still am.

I know your desire for more: more time for you, more for your children, more for your career, and more for your life. I see you always searching for that more in the education, classes, books, certificates, accolades, awards, promotions, raises, praises, and achievements. I see you searching for that thing, that achievement you’ve waited so long for, so you can finally take a break, rest, and be happy. The desire to feel appreciated and supported at work and home for all you’ve done, so finally, you don’t have to push so hard. Your desire for a more compassionate love.

I know your desires because they were mine, and sometimes they still are.

I am here to tell you that there is another way. That life can be different. You can be happy; you can love your life. You can have time for yourself; you can feel fulfilled; you can live a meaningful, purposeful life. Your life can be better than you ever imagined. Your fears, doubts, feelings, and thoughts can be transformed. You can rediscover the person inside of you, the one you feel you may have lost; you can have less stress, not be overwhelmed, and you can stop overworking yourself. I know this because I have lived it. I have transformed my life.

I wrote this book to help you transform your life, to be a safe place where you can go to hear stories of transformation, and to provide you with a platform for deep self-discovery and healing so that you can live a happier life. Remember, you have the choice; you have the power. I will be your guide on this journey; here is my plan to help you.

Everything you have learned about self-development has led you to this point, but it is here where the transformation happens. This book provides tools to heal the layers that have separated you from your Self, tools to be used to grow your connection to your Self, so you can gain clarity on what you want and who you are and boost your confidence to be who you were made to be. While this book helps reduce stress, it is not a book about getting active, eating healthy, avoiding unhealthy habits, getting enough sleep, and avoiding caffeine or alcohol. While these are all great, adding more to your to-do list will just add more stress. Instead, this book is designed to remove the layers, the Band-Aids you have used to cover up so many parts of you for so long, so you can rediscover who you are. So, you can rediscover the love within you.

What I have learned from my personal journey and in working with other women is that at the core, you have disconnected from your Self, your soul, who you are, what you want, what you need, and what you desire. This book will guide you back to your Self.

Throughout this book, I use many interchangeable