Lack Of Honour: Random Tangent, #8

By Chris Hollywood

Being on the brink of death can be an exhilarating experience, which is why people like to ride roller coasters or eat Indian food or perform autoerotic asphyxiation. Others prefer to avoid death at all costs. Then we have a certain plucky hero who seems to invite homicide. Maybe he just has one of those faces.

 

Defying death twice in one day would be enough for most people, but Mongrel Stevens was stupid enough to go for the hat trick. After stealing an ambulance to escape a dire situation, he found himself in a worse one involving a hospital-sent assassin named Shamus Bond. Not one to be outdone, Mongrel's mother is thrust into a murder as well: her own.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Chris Hollywood
• Release date: Mar 8, 2022
• ISBN: 9798201302009

Book preview

When you’ve got to go you’ve got to go. It’s a saying, and whether it means having to rush off to the bathroom at nearly the speed of light, or if you’re late for an appointment (especially an appointment at the bathroom), the quickest path is usually the most preferred one.

Mongrel Stevens might have benefited from this knowledge. He might also have benefited from some common sense, which was a rare trait in his lineage. He tore down Bloor St. in a stolen ambulance darting in and out of traffic – or at least trying to – in an attempt to run to a galaxy far, far away (or the nearest equivalent).

Dunttstown is an incredibly boring place to live. While it is a strange town, as most of its buildings and stores run along Bloor St., the main and longest street, it is also a rather large town, which this makes the main drag very long. This peculiar layout can be frustratingly difficult, especially when trying to get to work in rush hour traffic, and is one of the reasons many people choose not to live there. However, due to a new law instated by the mayor limiting the town’s population to five-hundred-fifty-five people[1], there wasn’t much traffic to begin with. As a result, Mongrel had only to dart in, or around, or about three cars in total, although he did so with a vigour that had not been seen since the last car chase the week before (as stated earlier, Dunttstown is very boring and people will do anything to pass the time).

We’re going awfully fast, Dent said, looking out the windshield from the back, and scared out of his one wit. Is it safe to do that?

Mongrel slammed on the brakes in alarm. Even though it had only been minutes, possibly even seconds, after he’d left the hospital, it had been far longer in real life, and he chose to live in the reality of the latter. As such, he’d forgotten Dent was there, and was startled enough to bring the van to a jarring halt in the middle of the road. Dent, who hadn’t been secured to anything, was launched headfirst into the dashboard. He scrambled around like a fart in a mitten before settling down in the passenger seat, and then looked at Mongrel with a charismatic grin that Mongrel wanted to beat off his face with a hammer. Despite the pain and the blood trickling down his face, his spirits remained high.

"You still okay? Mongrel asked, not at all pleased that Dent was still conscious. He had a lot to think about, and didn’t want to deal with Dent at the moment, talking and asking questions and generally being a nuisance.

Never better! Dent exclaimed, looking around excitedly. I’ve never been in one of these before. What is it called again?

It’s a car, Mongrel responded. Well, a van, I guess. You’ve...never been in a van?

Nope. I’ve seen them before on TV, but not up close and in person. This is my first time outside the hospital. Man, this is so cool! I’m, like, having an out-of-hospital experience. Far out man! He made a peace sign with his fingers and flaunted them in Mongrel’s face.

I thought you were in for an operation, Mongrel said, pushing the hand away.

Dent rolled his eyes. Yeah, an operation that’s lasted my entire life. I was born there, and I thought I’d die there too. I was a prisoner. He flicked a switch