The Boss In You

By Niya Brown Matthews

In this book, Niya Brown Matthews will teach you how to think like a boss, how to manage your professional and personal life, and stand out in the workplace as well as everywhere you go. Going from nothing to great success in her own life, and overcoming challenges such as breast cancer and more, Niya delivers life-changing tips and strategies f

• Language: English
• Publisher: Niya Brown Matthews
• Release date: Jun 18, 2015
• ISBN: 9780996216548

Book preview

Introduction

From Being Overwhelmed To Being An Overcomer

IWENT FROM HAVING A GOOD JOB MAKING SIX figures to losing everything; and then, from having nothing to recovering everything that I lost—and some. It hasn’t been an easy journey for me. There were many hurdles I had to overcome: frustrations, confusion, depression, fears, anxiety, disappointments, letdowns, moments when I felt like completely giving up. Many times I experienced a feeling of being completely overwhelmed and thinking that I was in over my head, but I discovered that if your dreams and goals don’t make you feel like you’re crazy, in over your head, and insane, then they aren’t big enough. I don’t play it safe and shoot for the ceiling; I shoot for the stars. If you aim further, even if you fail to hit your target, you’ll still land further than the average person who is simply trying to remain in a place of comfort. People who don’t aim high and shoot for the stars don’t get criticized, laughed at or called crazy; they don’t have family and love-ones looking at them as if they’ve lost it and need to check into a hospital somewhere; they don’t run into roadblocks and face disappointments because...they aren’t going anywhere to begin with; they don’t feel like giving-up because they haven’t even began to try. These emotions are a part of the package for those who are looking to do and be something great in life. I had to learn that over time. I had to learn that being someone important begins with ourselves. How do we see ourselves? What do we think about ourselves? Are we important in our own eyes? I had to learn how to see myself in a certain light and to believe in who I am, knowing that I possess the ability to create the type of life that I want to live. It all begins with what’s in your mind.

Do you see yourself as a victim? You can change this. You don’t have to be the product of your environment, your past, and other people’s opinions and words. You can determine who you want to be. Do you see yourself as someone who is unworthy of good things and success? You can change this also. Do you see yourself as less deserving than others and incapable handling your problems and your situation? Change it—I’m not speaking of your circumstances, I’m speaking of your perspective. See yourself differently, not as one who is powerless, inferior, useless, incapable of overcoming, and vulnerable, but as one who’s more than a conqueror through the power of the very One who created us. Have a conqueror’s mentality. That’s what it means to be a boss.

You’re reading a book that’s written by a conqueror, by a boss lady that possesses a confidence that allows her to look challenges and obstacles in the face and declare that they will not knock her down, a lady that possesses a fierceness about herself that causes her to tackle obstacles like a 300lbs linebacker, a lady who has learned how to wear several hats (businesswoman, boss lady, manager, entrepreneur, fashion consultant, motivational speaker, event planner, wife, mother, etc.). I’ve been blessed to appear on television (The Wendy Williams Show) and magazine covers, but that is what I look like now. I had to build up to this point in my mind. I had to learn how to see myself in these places first and also think like a boss, like a person who possesses the power to determine their own path and seize what they want in life; like a person that doesn’t wait for an opportunity to come their way, but create their own.

I didn’t come from a wealthy household. I came from a small town in North Carolina. My parents didn’t have a truck load of money to give me, but they did give me something much more valuable: a sense of purpose and direction; the revelation that I could take on the world; the revelation of who I was destined to be. My parents lit a flame on the inside of me as a child, one that caused me to grab life by the horns and seize prosperity and victory. I want to pass that same mentality, that same spark, that same flame on to you and tell you that you are destined for greatness. I see your face on billboards, magazine covers and television screens. I see you living it up and being a blessing to hundreds, thousands, millions of others. I see you succeeding beyond your wildest dreams because...you were created for it. You were created to be an overcomer.

Chapter 1

Are You In The Way Of Your Own Success?

EVERY SINCE I WAS JUST A LITTLE GIRL , my mother would tell me that I was destined for greatness. My mother shared with me a dream that she had of me once—it was a dream of me dressed in all white, standing before a crowd of thousands of people speaking. I was doused in lights. I was center-stage. I was leading and empowering others, propelling them toward their dreams. And I wish I could say that my journey to the place where I am today was a straight shot, a simple straight line. I wish I could say I always believed what my mother told me about myself and what she envisioned me doing. I wish I could tell you that I was supercharged, super-driven, unflinching; that I was never skeptical, dubious, and doubtful of myself and of having a bright future; that I never had moments when I felt as if I was incapable, unequipped, inadequate, and even unworthy of success in life. That would be the grandest fairy-tale of all, one even more imaginative than Cinderella and Snow White: me claiming to have never faced moments when I felt overwhelmed and unqualified, or underestimated myself. But in reality, my journey here wasn’t a straight line; it was a zigzag. The road to success is more of a roller-coaster ride—it’s an up-and-down process that takes you through unexpected turns, twists, loops, dark tunnels, and steady climbs followed by sudden drops. That is a more realistic depiction of success. Are you ready for the ride? I hope so. Because what I’m about to share with you here might just require that you buckle-up: You just may be the main hindrance standing in the way of your own success. I discovered that many of the twists and turns that I encountered along this journey were actually the result of my own attitude, of my own thinking. Some things I didn’t have to experience, but because of wrong thinking, I put myself through more than I had to go through along the way and also prevented myself from going further faster than I did. The biggest obstacle is often our own thinking.

Do you have an attitude problem?

So much of success is based off of one thing: our attitudes. In fact, attitude is often the main factor that determines whether you succeed or fail. In my experience, some people have gained employment and others have lost their employment not because of