"Abandoned Children" Rescued,Orphaned, Restored, and Refined.: Turn Your Pain into Purpose! Turn Your Purpose into Praise!

By Carolyn M. Driver

This book is written to minister and give inspiration and encouragement to all of the orphaned and foster children around the world. She wants to give hope to those children who feel unloved and feels no one cares about them. The book answers the question why were you created? God had a plan and purpose for your life. She wants all orphaned and abandoned children to know that God knew you while you were in your mother's womb. You were chosen by God to be born. She wants all abandoned and neglected children to know that God loves them and cares about them. Each child is very special in God's eye sight. She wants people to know that she did beat the odds even though she was abandoned at birth. She talks about her trials and tribulations from birth to adulthood. She talks about what it was like living in an orphanage and then a foster home. She discusses difficulties she had in selecting a mate for marriage as a result of not having a positive role model for a father as she was growing up. She discusses her triumphs in getting a college education which was very important to her survival in life. She discusses how she was able to achieve and accomplish her goals in life with the help of Jesus Christ. God sent an angel to rescue her.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Jan 13, 2012
• ISBN: 9781467877008

Carolyn M. Driver

Carolyn was was born in Connecticut. She was abandoned by both of her parents in infancy. Her biological mother and father disappeared without a trace shortly after she was born in 1945. She has never met the woman that gave birth to her. She has first hand knowledge of the pain, hurt, and suffering that a child has to endure when they are abandoned by their parents. She was placed in a Catholic orphanage at approximately the age of two. She lived in the orphanage from the age of two until the age of seven.She never met her biological mother or father. She was told that all of her blood relatives were dead the reason she was placed in an orphanage only to learn years later that blood relatives were alive and well. She was placed in her first foster home at the age of six and lived in this home until the age of seventeen. She was blessed to be raised in a Christian home environment. She was told by her high school counselor that she could never go to college because she was orphaned and then raised as a foster child. She did beat the odds. She earned her Associate of Arts degree in Early Childhood Education. She earned her Bachelor of Science degree in Geronology and Public Administration, and earned her Master's degree in Business Organizational Management. She is a woman of survival. She strives to be a positive role model for other people that have been orphaned or placed in foster care. She had the determination to turn a negative circumstances into positive outcomes. She is the author of "Guidelines for writing successful grant proposals for nonprofit organizations".

Book preview

Abandoned Children

Rescued, Orphaned, Restored, and Refined.

Turn your pain into purpose! Turn your purpose into praise!

Carolyn M. Driver

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AuthorHouse™

1663 Liberty Drive

Bloomington, IN 47403

www.authorhouse.com

Phone: [phone]

© 2011 Carolyn M. Driver. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

First published by AuthorHouse 6/8/2012

ISBN: 978-1-4678-7700-8 (e)

ISBN: 978-1-4678-7701-5 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-4678-7702-2 (sc)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2011961781

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

BIBLICAL REFERENCES: NEW KING JAMES VERSION BIBLE (NKJV)

Contents

Acknowledgements

A Tribute to My Mother Evangelist Pearl Williams

Preface

Chapter 1.   Abandoned at Birth by Both Natural Mother and Father

Chapter 2.   Life in a Catholic Orphange

Chapter 3.   God Sent Two Angels to the Rescue

Chapter 4.   First Meeting with Blood Relatives

Chapter 5.   Mentor and Advisor

Chapter 6.   Reuniting with My Siblings

Chapter 7.   Challenges in Choosing a Mate

Chapter 8.   Marriage and Brokenhearted

Chapter 9.   Mistakes Churches Make in Ministry

Chapter 10. Pastors Need to Be Transparent

Chapter 11. There Are Blessings in Forgiveness

Chapter 12. Woman of Survivial: A Taste of Success

Chapter 13. Turn Your Pain into Purpose! Turn Your Purpose into Praise!

Conclusion

Letter of Forgiveness

Biblical References

Acknowledgements 

To my beloved deceased foster mother Evangelist Pearl Williams who went home to be with the Lord 2011 after living to the beautiful age of 98. In essence she was my real mother. Evangelist/Missionary Pearl Williams did not give birth to me from her womb as in natural childbirth, but she gave me birth from her heart. Thank you Ma for your love, care, support, and prayers. Thank you for introducing me to Salvation at an early age. Thank you for rescuing me. I am the woman God has destined me to become because of you. Thank you for helping me to reach my ordained destiny in Jesus Christ. I love you from the bottom of my heart. I know you are in heaven now rejoicing with Jesus Christ.

Many special thanks to all of my four foster sisters, Lee, Gladys, Bessie, and Pauline. I thank all of my foster family members who always showed me love, support, and respect even though we were not blood sisters. Thank you for having enough room in your hearts to take on another sister, and treating me like a blood sister. I love all of you from the bottom of my heart. Thanks for accepting me just as I was with unconditional love.

I thank the Catholic Church for rescuing me when I was abandoned by my natural birth parents. The Catholic Church provided a place of safety and refuge for me. Again, thanks.

I thank my twin sister Cynthia for her unconditional love and support.

I thank my Apostolic Pentecostal Church for its positive influence in my life. This is where I learned about salvation and my destiny in Christ.

Thanks to everyone that has had a positive impact in my life. I thank all of my pastors, bishops, ministers, evangelist, elders, and educators that aided in giving me the correct direction and path for my life.

I thank God for giving me the courage to share my life story with others.

Thank you, Author House Publishers, for getting this book into the public venues, and for getting the book into the hands of the readers.

I dedicate this book to my mother, Evangelist Pearl Williams.

Humbly, Simply, Devoted, and Committed to Jesus Christ, Carolyn M. Driver

A Tribute to My Mother

Evangelist Pearl Williams 

WHAT MY MOTHER MEANT TO ME IS SPELLED IN HER NAME

P- She was a Prayer warrior, a Peace maker, And she Praised the Lord

E- She was an Evangelist; Eternal Life with Christ is her goal

A- She was an Anointed woman of God

R- She Rejoiced, she was a Rescuer, she Ran the race and won

L- She had Loving kindness in her heart for people

W- She had Wisdom; She was a woman after God’s own heart

I- She was Ignited by the Holy Spirit

L- She Loved the Lord

L- She Lived a Life pleasing to Jesus Christ

I- She had Integrity

A- She was Available to God 24/7

M- She was a Missionary, She did Marvelous works

S- She was Saved, She was Sanctified, and had Salvation

When Evangelist Pearl Williams stands before God in heaven, He will say to her well done, my good and faithful servant!

Thank you Ma for leaving me a positive legacy. I will carry on your legacy in ministry. From your daughter with love, Carolyn Marie Driver

Preface 

This is a memoir of my life. It is a true story of being abandoned by both of my natural parents. It is written to help people that have been abandoned and orphaned by their biological parent(s).

I will share my story of abandonment with you and how I was able to overcome the hurt and pain of feeling rejected and unloved by my natural birth parents. I won’t be able to give all of the details of my abandonment because when I was abandoned I was only two months old, however, I will tell you as much as I can from my early days of abandonment of what I have been told.

We often hear or read about stories of substance abuse, legal or illicit drug addiction, alcoholism addiction, verbal abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse, elder abuse, psychological abuse, even animal abuse, sexual abuse, molestation, or other forms of abuse, but rarely do you hear of stories of the impact of being abandoned by our natural parents which I consider another form of abuse and neglect. I always consider emotional abuse in this kind of situation, and how it can negatively affect a child’s life for many years. And in some cases can ruin a child’s life forever. Sometimes the effects can last a life time if Jesus Christ is not involved in the healing process of abandonment.

I know what God can do when a person is suffering from mental and emotional agony of abandonment. I have firsthand knowledge of the pain that abandonment can cause. I experienced this in my own personal life. Just because a woman has a baby, this doesn’t make her a mother. A mother nurses, cares, and nurtures her offspring. Just because a man can plant a seed, this does not make him a father. A father provides, teaches, protects, and leads his family. He sets up the foundation and structure for his household.

It is my hope that by me sharing my story of abandonment, it will help other people that have experienced abandonment. I hope this book provides coping skills of how to be restored and refreshed through Jesus Christ. The battle of abandonment scars is not yours, they belong to God. He is the healer for those that diligently seek Him.

In the bible, in the book of Jeremiah 1:5 it says Before I formed you in the womb I knew you; before you were born I sanctified you; I ordained you a prophet to the nations (NKJV).

Some of the information that I am giving in this book was provided to me by other family members as I was too young to know the whole turn of events surrounding my actual birth. My natural birth mother I will call her Mrs. Lucie was living with her natural father in the projects of public housing in Connecticut. I was born in Connecticut. I am a twin and was born second. We were born premature of eight months of my birth mother’s pregnancy. We are fraternal twins. I also have two older sisters and one older brother. My natural blood brother is the oldest of the five children. His name is Evan. My other sister’s names are Nora and Beatrice. My twin sister and I are the youngest of the five children that my natural mother gave birth to. I was always referred to as the twin. It was like I didn’t have a name to be called by. I felt like I did not have an identity of my own. Everyone in the community always referred to me and my twin sister as the twins. Rarely were we addressed by our individual names. Our school teachers addressed us by name in the classroom, but at church or in a group setting, we were always addressed as the twins.

I know God had a will and purpose for my life. Even though I was abandoned by my natural birth parents, God knew what He was doing when He created me. God had a special purpose and plan for my life. It is my goal and vision to do what God has called me to do. I have a destiny to reach in Jesus Christ. I had to turn my pain into purpose. You will read further in this book how I used my pain to change the lives of other people that were also in pain. You can turn your pain into purpose too. Pray and ask God what the purpose is for your life as you deal with your pain. Seek God for an answer. Do what He instructs you to do.

This book is written to minister to people that have been abandoned and felt unloved, rejected, and thrown away growing up. Just know that God never abandoned you. You were chosen by God to be born. God has loved you from the day you were born. He loved you before you were born. God never makes a mistake when he creates life. He also created you for a divine will and purpose. God had a plan for your life even though you may not know what that plan is. Seek God for the purpose for your life. He will give you an answer. In the bible, Deuteronomy 4:29 states But from there you will seek the Lord your God, and you will find Him if you seek Him with all your heart and with all your soul (NKJV). Talk to God and ask Him, what is the purpose for your life? He will give you the answer when you seek it directly from Him. Only God knows why he created you. Do God’s will and plan for your life. God is love!

In the bible, John 14:18 says I will not leave you orphans, I will come to you (NKJV). God did rescue me when I was abandoned by both of my biological parents. He was with me all the way throughout my life. God never gave up on me.

I know that I was chosen by God to be born. My birth was ordained by God. I am going to walk out the purpose for what God has created me for. I must control my own destiny in Christ!

I had to let the past go and move forward with my life. I had to get over my abandonment issues, my hurt, my anger, my bitterness, my pain, and work on the purpose and plan God has for me. God gave me the mercy and grace to forgive my parents that abandoned me. I have also forgiven the people that have betrayed me or hurt me. Forgiveness is for you as well as the other person. Be free!

It is my prayer for you that you will be healed of all of your abandonment issues as you read this book. Be encouraged! Joy comes in the morning! Jesus was with me every step of the way.

In the bible, 2 Corinthians 6:18 says I will be a father to you, And you shall be My sons and daughters, Says the Lord Almighty (NJKV).

Chapter One

Abandoned at Birth by Both Natural Mother and Father 

Carolyn Perry was born in 1945 in Hartford, Connecticut. I was the last of five children to be born. I am also a twin to my sister. I will call my biological mother Mrs. Lucie. She lived with her father who was my natural grandfather in the same apartment complex in the projects. One day, very early in the morning, my natural mother told my grandfather she was going out and left us with him. She got into a taxi-cab and was never seen again. This was in 1945. It is now year 2011. My natural mother abandoned all five of her children 66 years ago.

The word abandoned simply means to desert a person. It is giving up entirely on some one’s life by just walking away. I do not remember any of the details that occurred in my life from birth until age two.

I do not refer to my natural birth mother as my mother. I refer to her as the woman that gave birth to me. In my opinion, a real mother does not abandon her children and disappear off the face of the earth to where she can never be found. I consider my foster mother my real mother because this is the only woman that raised me as a daughter for most of my life. She was there through thick and thin even though she did not carry me in her womb and give birth to me. I feel that most healthy women can give birth to a baby, but a real mother hangs in there and does what is necessary to nurture, support, provide, educate, and raise the child until he or she can take care of themselves. A real mother loves her children and does whatever she can to do the right thing by them. Even if my parents could not provide for me, they could have taken the necessary steps to make sure I was taken care of by making arrangements so that I could have at least had the opportunity to know who they are in the future. Abandonment should have not been an option.

Growing up I actually hated both of my biological parents for abandoning me at such an early age. I always wondered how does a mother just walk off and abandon five small children. I was abandoned at two months old along with my twin sister. What kind of a woman abandons her babies? I am still looking for an answer to this question.

My twin sister and I were two months old when she abandoned us. We were born last. My biological mother’s husband was in the military during this time so I have been told. He denies being my natural father. So who is my natural father? He was married to my natural mother at the time of our birth. An older woman I will call her Ms. Sue took care of me, my twin sister, my two other sisters, and my older brother. The only thing I can remember about this woman is that every night before she would go to bed she would comb her very long silky hair. She had beautiful hair. I do not know the details of how we all ended up with Ms. Sue. My twin sister and I were two years old when we were taken from Ms. Sue along with my older brother and two other sisters. I was told that a police woman, I will call her officer BE. came to the home of Ms. Sue and removed us from her and turned all of us over to the State Department of Children Services of Connecticut in 1947. We are now called Wards of the Court in the State of Connecticut. We are now in the Welfare Foster Care System. I have two older sisters and one older brother. My natural mother gave birth to five children and she abandoned all five of them. We were split up by the State Department of Connecticut.

My twin sister and I were kept together, but my other two older sisters and one older brother were split