The Greatness of Gratitude

By J. B. Powell

The Greatness of Gratitude takes a naked look at what it means to live a thankful life. It reminds us that while we have little or no control over many of the things that come our way, we have power and governance over how we react to them. This book provokes us to evaluate how we treat each other, manage our relationships, and utilize our time. It moves us to consider the biblical foundation for gratitude and the discipline and intricacies of living a gracefully grateful life. It moves the reader to live thoughtfully and thankfully so that gratitude becomes the dominant thread that is woven in the fabric of his life.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Aug 21, 2019
• ISBN: 9781796015010

J. B. Powell

J.B. Powell believes that good communication is foundational for every person who desires to relate well with people in order to impact their lives. Her desire to come alongside people from different spheres of life demands a willingness to learn and evolve as culture and the means of communication grows and evolves. J.B. Powell is the author of The Energy of Encouragement: How Affirmation Can Lift You and Everyone Around You. She has a B.A. in Broadcast Journalism from Emerson College, A Master of Theology, and a Master of Arts in Christian Education from Dallas Theological Seminary. She and her husband are teachers and get great satisfaction from working with students and seeing them learn and grow. She is known for her faith in God and a firm belief that people excel when they are taught to work hard, be self-sufficient, and always say, “Thank you” for what they receive. Her love for God, family, and country and her desire to awaken people from the warped web of entitlement-thinking were pivotal for writing The Greatness of Gratitude.

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Chapter 1

Gratitude and You

Gratitude is being thankful for what you have and being thoughtful enough to recognize what you have been given. Gratitude is humility clothed in grace. It is appreciation and acceptance. It is the humility to accept, with an open heart, what was given to you. Gratitude is the opposite of feeling entitled. It is having the proper perspective toward the people who gift you with their time and share their possession. Gratitude is for everyone, no matter your age, creed, or color. Gratitude, for the Christ-follower, is love for God and people. Gratitude is joy. Gratitude is beauty. Gratitude is blissful. It is at the very center of God’s heart.

A thankful person is easy to spot. Her language gives her away. When you are thankful, your sentences are laced with kind, positive words that uplift and encourage. People who are thankful soar. You cannot stop them from excelling. They are lithe in their communication and bear an air of humility and depth. They are self-deprecating, and they laugh at their flubs. They are approachable and appealing. They do not flaunt their success because they know that whatever they achieve comes from God and the help of others. They are quick to lend a hand because they remember the times when others helped them. Grateful people are eager to motivate. They do not quickly forget the bitter taste of defeat. They nod willingly to show acceptance. They know that the worth of a man or woman is never in his or her physical appearance, but it’s etched in that person’s character. They know that character solidifies worth and that God made every person with beauty, even if that beauty is marred by illness, tragedy, or poor choices. People who practice gratitude are attractive and admired. There is something magnetic about them. Such people exude strength, and they empower those around them. Victimization is not in their vocabulary. They succeed in life, and they are strong. They are not easily swayed by criticism. They do not buckle when dark clouds sweep across their paths. They know how to stand, how to grit their teeth, how to firm up their stance, and how to persist. They are men and women of relentless fortitude. They look like you.

You and I have had difficulty, and we will have problems in the future. Guaranteed. No one, no matter how young, is immune to disappointment. I have rubbed shoulders with extremely wealthy people, and I can tell you with perfect certainty that they have cares and anxieties just like you and me. Their children may have around-the-clock help to answer them at a moment’s call, but they too have trials. When you sit on your hand-me-down sofa in your cramped apartment devoid of desired amenities, it is hard for you to believe that you are not at the bottom of the barrel in terms of worth. By worth, I mean happiness, ability, and net value. It seems nonsensical for me to convince you that your life is not much different from someone with a newly minted Rolls Royce, a 150-foot yacht, and an unending cash flow, but your life is not very different. You have the same capacity for joy as the wealthy person. You can pursue happiness, you can develop your skills, you can grow, and you can thrive. You may not be able to do those things at the same pace as one with affluence, but you can become a better, happier you despite your limited resources.

I remember the time in the third grade when my mother did not have enough money for my lunch, and she could not find suitable food for me to take to school. It only happened once, but I have not forgotten it. Mom looked around the entire house and could not find enough change to pay for my lunch that Thursday. Back then, a school lunch was cheap but too expensive for Mom’s stretched budget. I was not particularly fond of the school lunches, to be honest, and rarely did I gobble the food the way many of the other kids did. However, eating a hot meal at school was considered healthy. The school served well-seasoned meat swimming in gravy, along with bulgur on the side, or meat ladled atop potatoes and dumplings. You could see the steam rising from the food heaped up on our little plates. I liked school and loved to learn and was quite fond of my teacher, so my heart sank when Mom told me I could only attend for half the day. That meant I had to leave school at lunchtime and walk home all by myself.

The school was over three miles from my house, and there was hardly any shade along the long stretch of road. The sun was merciless most days, and by the time I would get home in the afternoons, my uniform would be quite damp, if not wet, with sweat. There was not another kid in sight as I walked home that Thursday, and the midday sun seemed determined to scorch my skinny arms and legs with its heat. The most common sightings were vehicles zooming by on the highway. Here and there, I could see people working in their backyards, but I was the only person walking on that long stretch of highway for most of the journey home. I had lots of time to think, and while time had erased the contents of my childhood reasoning that day, I do remember telling myself that I was going to work hard so I could have enough money for whatever I wanted. I bemoaned the fact that I had to miss the afternoon lessons, plus I would have to make up the homework that was assigned that afternoon. I was sad, but that event helped shape me. It made me want to be strong and made me want to excel. I am grateful for that difficult time because it birthed within me the desire to work hard in order to provide well for myself.

Whatever difficulty you are experiencing, see it as prized education and learn well. Your difficulty is part of your story. It is part of your journey. Accept your challenge and walk your path with an attitude of gratitude. Let determination brace you and grit uphold you. Work with resilience. Push forward with passion, and never feel sorry for yourself. Keep your eyes straight ahead, and let your vision guide you. Always remember to bend your knees often because giants are never conquered without frequent prayer. God is your guide and bulwark. Is anything too hard for the Lord (Jer. 32:17 NASB)? Not when God’s agenda is your pursuit. When you are going after what God says you should, no force of darkness and no tempest or battalion can derail you permanently. You may have setbacks, but God’s work in and through you will not be thwarted. You must begin to see God as mighty and magnanimous. He is very strong. That is the simplest way of describing God. He is big and kind. Once that truth is ingrained in your mind and cemented in your thinking, you will not be quick to doubt God. If God says run and you run, you can be assured that he is running beside you and his angels are running ahead of you, behind you, and next to you. When you are doing God’s will, you are never doing it alone. He does not give you a task in which he himself does not partake. I don’t care if it’s as simple as washing dishes at a local soup kitchen or scrubbing toilets. You can bet your bottom dollar that the Almighty King also has his hands in that soapy water as you scrub those dirty pots.

There was one Saturday in particular when I most assuredly felt God’s embrace and holy awe as I washed pots and pans at my church. I was volunteering to help with Supper on Saturdays, an outreach program that provides free meals to those in need. As I was washing the pans, my heart got quiet and my eyes welled up with tears as the love of God just seemed to veil itself around me. I became filled with joy and with a deep sense of gratitude. I knew that I was doing what God wanted me to do. I was spending my time the way he wanted me to, and I felt humbled and energized. I felt a settled peace and deep satisfaction.

If gratitude is so beautiful, why do we not see it more? Why aren’t people more grateful? Why do complainers seem ubiquitous and the grateful ones hard to find? I believe people complain more than they appreciate because they want others to empathize with them and, if nothing else, give them attention and solace. The chronic complainers allow their wants to blur their vision, and their inherent childlike, me-only attitude has not matured. They have not allowed God to give them the peace and perspective needed to squelch their perpetual murmuring. God can change anyone’s heart, but not many are interested in spiritual matters. Too few want him, yet all need him. If you want God, you can have him—anytime, anywhere. To truly know him means you have to spend time with him. You will never truly know him by simply doing things your way. If you want to know God, you must lay aside your agenda, your way of doing things, your pride, your self-sufficiency, and your attitude. Look to him to learn his way.

The biggest and quickest way to know God is to read the Bible. You can’t get what God has for you by staying away from him and doing things your way. Getting to know God takes time and intentionality. Chronic complaining is unattractive to God. You won’t win his heart if all you do is to complain and murmur. I’m not saying you should not vent to God. On the contrary, you should be open and honest about everything when you talk with God. Being pretentious does not work with him. Remember who you’re dealing with; he knows your heart anyway. It’s okay to complain sometimes, but that should not be the signature of your heart. Can you imagine going out on a dinner date with someone who just griped throughout the meal? It would just sour your time, and it’s not that everyone who complains is unpleasant, but without God as your center, complaining can become a nasty habit that takes over your attitude the way blue rug juniper spreads through a garden. However, the cross can turn the most self-absorbed heart into a selfless one. Be a thankful person. Practice saying thank you to God and people.

Gratitude recognizes people and thanks them accordingly. Whenever someone begins to control, demand, overpower, or step on another to prove rank or power, doom is sure. Remember what happened to Haman when he tried to undo Mordecai? Haman had no good reason to hate Mordecai, but he despised him just because Mordecai would not stroke his ego (Esther 3:5). Mordecai refused to bow down or pay homage to Haman as that would defy his Jewish religious beliefs. This enraged Haman so much so that he wanted to wipe out the entire Jewish race in Persia. Haman became embittered rather than recognize that he had rank and Mordecai’s lack of homage did not lessen his authority over all the princes. The higher you go, the more you must grow in humility if you are to positively impact those under you. Watch the person who skips from job to job because of personality conflicts and insubordination. More often than not, that individual struggles with submission. You will soon find that he is insecure, prideful, and clutches to power as a survival mechanism. That type of individual often struggles to be thankful. You cannot be thankful yet rude and uncooperative. You cannot be grateful yet unwilling to submit to authority. You cannot squelch others and grow. Every emotionally healthy person must be willing to receive feedback with grace.

How do you avoid falling into the complaining trap? You must keep in touch with God and must have accountability. Counseling is helpful, and honesty is necessary. You need to look inside yourself and be honest. You must depend on the Holy Spirit to shine a light inside your heart, and you must work with him to pull out all the unkindness that fights to lodge there. You must be like the surgeon who meticulously examines the intestines for polyps that may become malignant if left to grow. You must be like the gardener who intentionally gets down on his knees to pull out the weeds by the roots. If you just pull off the tops of weeds, you will have greener weeds in a couple of days. I know this from experience as I spend a lot of time grooming my garden. My flower beds require unending attention. So often I will pull into my driveway, and from my vantage point, the garden looks lush and green. However, on closer inspection, I find that there are weeds that have lodged themselves close to the New Guinea impatiens, crept into the bed of begonias, and hidden themselves among the geraniums. The thorns on the rose bushes are not prickly enough to deter them. To see them, you have to get close and survey the area keenly. Then you must carefully uproot them, so they don’t come back overnight. The weeds will easily imitate the vegetables, and they will rob your edibles of vital nutrients unless you can get rid of them. The same goes for chronic complainers, murmurers, and sour souls. You cannot get close to those people for long, or they will corrode you. You have to carefully limit your time with them if you are unable to turn them into people of gratitude, or they will soon sour your soul, squelch your joy, and turn on you in the end.

Gratitude is not always the positive response to a deed done for you or the grasp of an outstretched hand. We often feel the deepest gratitude when we witness the good that people do for others. We hear of stories where complete strangers do acts of kindness with no desire for praise or attention. As a matter of fact, most of those people are embarrassed when the media publicizes their good deeds. When we see that an individual’s need has been met, the act of that goodness alone touches a chord deep inside of us and reminds us that God is good. God’s people are capable of goodness, and that goodness comforts and whispers hope to our hearts. We feel that comfort when we have a personal need that we cannot meet, and God provides for us through his people. This is true whether the provision is physical or emotional.

When superstorm Sandy pummeled New Jersey in late October 2012, men and women gave aid. People left the comfort of their homes and headed to the northeast to help complete strangers. It was comforting to see such kindness. Then, Hurricane Harvey in late August of 2017 forced itself against the gulf coast of Texas and overturned the seas upon Corpus Christi, Galveston, Houston, and the surrounding areas, leaving many homeless and distraught. People began to galvanize their assets and time, and they helped in momentous ways. Many of us sat glued to our television sets as we anxiously awaited word from family and friends. What moved me most was not the media’s commentary on Melania Trump’s shoes, but the men and women who sacrificed themselves to help people they had no relationship with and who they may never see face-to-face again. One could see the look of desperation in many who lost everything in the storm, but they were thankful to be rescued from sure doom as their houses were flooded. Gratitude was evident in their eyes. The same was true when Hurricane Charlie fanned its fury on Florida’s backside in August 2004 and caused undue damage and destruction, though not to the degree that Harvey belched out its rage. In all these examples, the grace of God and the goodness of his people shone brightly amid the despair of desperate hearts.

My friend was getting married on August 26. It was the very Saturday that Harvey hit Houston. My husband and I tried to fly out the Friday before. The airport was a zoo, and errors were made with our tickets that were beyond our control, which caused our delay. I did not make the 6:00 AM flight, and though I could have taken a later flight and gotten to Dallas in time for the wedding the next evening, one of the airline agents cautioned me against going. She told me that I might make it to Dallas, but she was almost sure there would be no flights out of Houston on the twenty-seventh. I had to wrestle with choosing to go or staying put. I stayed put, and my husband and I were glad that we heeded the words of caution. There was no way we would have made it out of Houston for an entire week. I was eager to get to church that Sunday to just worship with other believers. I was thankful. My heart was as soft as crème fraîche the entire weekend when the news of the devastation came across the airwaves. I had to be at work early on Monday, and had I gone, I would have had to find an alternate way home that was sure to be eventful. I was extremely grateful to God for leading us to remain home. When disappointments come, pain often follows, but when we reflect on the outcomes, we can see that all things do work out for our good. There is one master orchestrator with limitless knowledge who orders our steps, and since his ways are perfect, we must trust him when we are befuddled and concerned.

For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son in order that humanity might receive grace and forgiveness with the goal that they would replicate heaven’s agenda on earth. Part of that agenda is cultivating and deliberately maintaining a grateful heart, so don’t let difficulty lead you to be ungrateful and self-absorbed. No matter how you feel, think about others and find something for which you can be thankful. When anxiety enwraps you like a fruitless vine, gratitude is hard to muster. It is hard to find, but you must find it. You must dig deep and scoop up thanks. Say it. Sing it. Pray it. Moan it. It does not matter how you get it to come out; it only matters that you say it. Being able to say thanks requires action on your part, so no matter how hard it gets, find a way to say thank you.

You don’t have to stretch your will to be anxious. Anxiety watches you when you wake up every morning and stands by your sink when you wash your face. It intrudes on you without hesitation. You don’t have to exert self-will for anxiety to draw close, but you have to willfully bid it adieu to get rid of it. Anxiety should never resonate with you, especially if you are a Christ-follower. It is against your Christo-centric DNA to live in a constant state of anxiety. It should not ingrained in your reformed way of thinking. It’s foreign. It is antilove and anti-God. Don’t nurse it. Crush it! Your weapon of choice for this indefatigable malady is gratitude. In everything give thanks. For this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus (1 Thess. 5:18 NASB). Put on your armor of thanksgiving and watch despair melt away.

Despair is a close relative of depression, and together they breed anxiety, and while some of us can shake depression at certain times, others find it difficult to do so. For some, depression is a clinical illness that necessitates medical attention, but even if you are under medical treatment for depression, you must fight for yourself as pills and a clinician cannot do all the work for you. Recovery from any illness is personal and always requires personal input. Put thanksgiving into your personal arsenal for the battle you are currently fighting. Fight with fervor so that you will win. No one wins by chance. You can win by divine intervention, but every winner must strategize. Jesus did. He tells us that to overcome, we must fast and pray (Mark 9:29 NKJV). He tells us to be alert so that we are not led astray by the devil (1 Pet. 5:8). He tells us that we must petition him through prayer and thanksgiving. He urges us to pray often and to meditate on his word with every breath we take. In other words, prayer and meditation should be intentionally woven into our day if we are going to win. Winning takes work, and winners are always envied.

If we persevere in giving thanks and meditating on the goodness of God, we will override the anxiety that is sure to peer into our lives. In spite of the magnitude, quantity, and diversity of our trials, afflictions, and difficulties, anxiety should not exist under any circumstances. This is because we have a Father in heaven who is almighty, who loves his children as he loves his ‘one and only Son’ (John 3:16), and whose complete joy and delight it is to continually assist them under all circumstances (Cowman, Streams in the Desert, p. 385).

Many Christians will tell you that they trust God, but fewer will say they entrust their problems to him completely. Trust is hard because like gratitude, it is developed over time. The major difference between trust and gratitude is that trust is cultivated mostly through difficulty. Trials and adversity build trust muscles, while gratitude is more easily cultivated and expressed during prosperity. People tend to be happy with you if your hands are always doling out goodies and favors. Pull back a little, and you will see how they really feel. I see it all too often. Those who seek only to receive are opportunists and often disloyal. Let’s refuse to be that way but rather respect boundaries and be grateful for every act of kindness that is shown to us.

Chapter 2

Portraits of Gratitude

Portraits of gratitude are all around you if only you will stop and look. There are people who daily rise above their difficulties with poise because gratitude is an issue of the heart. Gratitude defines one’s character, and character does not betray. My papa was a grateful man. He died in his late eighties, and I am amazed at the way he faced his illness and subsequent passing. He knew he was going to die, yet he never once complained. Cancer was mean to him, but he faced it head-on with acceptance. There was no resentment, no bitterness, and no self-pity. That’s character. His life was not flawless. He made mistakes, and he had regrets, but his death had anything but regret. The man lived well, and I am so proud to be his granddaughter. I received many, if not most, of my core values from him. It was he and my grandmother who first taught me to say thank you. Mom hammered it in, but they taught me first.

We must first decide what we value and what we want our lives to represent. We must know what we are willing to die for and what we are willing to live for. Our culture keeps us so busy that we are not spending enough time to contemplate these matters. We are surrounded by secular progressives who peer over their glasses from their ivory towers at evangelicals and anyone who dares to disagree with them. Those who believe in the Bible, live by Judeo-Christian principles, love America, hate big government, and want to uphold the Constitution are eyed with caution at best and demonized at worst. Everyone in our democratic republic should have freedom of thought and freedom of expression. Men died to ensure this freedom. Our founding fathers crafted the Constitution carefully to ensure that our rights and freedom are not usurped. Everyone has freedom of religion. Everyone has the right to think freely. Everyone has the right to his day in court. We are thankful that we live in the United States of America, and we should be proud patriots and should never forget the sweat and blood that have secured our freedom. We want to be able to speak truth without being borked and bullied on social media. We—you and me—must decide what our values are, and we must evaluate them to ensure they are honest and good. We must clearly but lovingly define what is nonnegotiable so that our conscience is free and clear. We must decide if holding to our faith in Jesus and living well is what we value most. I would dare say that it is impossible to live well without placing God’s law as our foundation. To live well demands a foundation. It demands a life of gratitude, and you cannot have gratitude if you do not have faith in something outside of yourself. I am not saying that Christianity is the only religion that teaches gratitude. Not at all. What I am saying is that your heart has to be steered toward thankfulness because life gets ugly, and without faith, you can become resentful and unthankful.

Over a year ago, I struggled with anemia that stemmed from complications I was having, and