Your Power, Your Choice: A Guide to Living Your Best Life

By Eddie Medina

We get up in the morning, get our children ready for school, drive the same route to work, stop at the same coffee shop, and park in the same parking spot at work—and that is only the first part of our day.

We spend our evenings the same way—scrambling to cook dinner, get the kids to bed, and catch a little bit of TV if we’re lucky. We get wrapped up in our daily activities, but very few of these activities help us to grow as individuals.

Our lives are full of these routines, and on top of that, we spend much of our time wanting what other people have and never knowing who we are. We simply lose track.

Your Power, Your Choice explores how to take the first step to becoming the best you. It reveals what it takes to finally make things happen.

It’s time to take a close, honest look at yourself to realize who you are, where you are, and where you’d like to be. And from there, you can leverage universal laws to create the life you want.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Balboa Press
• Release date: Oct 6, 2018
• ISBN: 9781982212445

Eddie Medina

Eddie Medina started his career as an athletic trainer helping injured athletes return to playing form. He has worked in education and school administration for more than twenty-five years. He is also the facilitator of the Life’s Lessons seminar that has helped hundreds achieve their goals. He believes we are all connected, sharing energy that influences our lives. He is an example of how working with the universal laws, we can create our best life through mindfulness and deliberate living.

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Copyright © 2018 Eddie Medina.

Interior Graphics/Art Credit: Jade Phensiriphand

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This book is a work of non-fiction. Unless otherwise noted, the author and the publisher make no explicit guarantees as to the accuracy of the information contained in this book and in some cases, names of people and places have been altered to protect their privacy.

The author of this book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique as a form of treatment for physical, emotional, or medical problems without the advice of a physician, either directly or indirectly. The intent of the author is only to offer information of a general nature to help you in your quest for emotional and spiritual well-being. In the event you use any of the information in this book for yourself, which is your constitutional right, the author and the publisher assume no responsibility for your actions.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Getty Images are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

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ISBN: 978-1-9822-1243-8 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-9822-1245-2 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-9822-1244-5 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2018911199

Balboa Press rev. date: 10/03/2018

This book goes out to anyone and everyone who aspires to be more. It is for those who know they are destined for more—those who want to achieve more, acquire more, do more, experience more, and be more. It is for all those who want to live their best life.

The connection with who you are,

The connection with a higher power,

The connection with nature,

The connection with others—

There is no greater journey.

CONTENTS

Acknowledgments

Introduction

Understanding the Universal Laws

The Power of Thinking

Who Are You?

Your Choice

Control

Stress

Responsibility

Goals

Faith

Living in the Now

Epilogue

References

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

I have been blessed to have so many people in my life who have supported me throughout. So many of my family and friends have helped me in the process of writing this book. From the inception, I have received positive support, which has enabled me to finish this labor of love and service. Everyone mentioned below has helped me with the development of this book, starting with my mom, Zanoni. From the beginning, she has been the one person who has helped me in so many ways. I wouldn’t have been able to do it without her. She has given me spiritual guidance and advice on many relevant parts of the book. Thank you, Mom.

My wife, Mary, has been everything to our family—wife, mother, daughter, sister, and friend. She has been a big support to me on this project. She never complained about the time it took away from our family for me to write this book. She created the space I needed to work and, in many ways, inspired me to be the person I am today. I love you, babe.

My two boys, Nick and Noah, have supported me from the beginning, inspiring me to keep writing. They also help motivate me to live a better life. Love you both so much.

Then there is my sister Maytté. I can’t say enough about her and the energy and passion she has shown me and others by always trying to live her best life. She has a beautiful spirit and lives life on her terms. I have always admired her for that. My other sister, Angie, has also been an example for me. She has shown me that it does not matter what others think; you live your life according to your beliefs and morals. Love you both.

I want to give a special thank-you to Grandma Mary. She has been an angel on earth for me, my wife, and many others. Her spiritual guidance and life lessons have shown me how to look at life with determination and compassion. She helped me stay grounded through some of my toughest times. Thank you, Grandma.

I also want to thank other members of my family, including my cousins, Hugo, Jessie, and Sergio. They embody the term family. We should all take a page from their book.

And then there is my Aunt Omnis. She is a rock and pillar in our family, and I am thankful to her for all the support she has given me throughout my life. My aunt Terri and Uncle John are two amazing people I am proud to call my family. I love both of you.

To our best friends, Gunther and Martha—you might as well be family. You are. We have always been there for each other, but more importantly, we have been there to see our families grow through the years. Each experience has brought our families closer.

To Betty and Manny—even though we don’t always see each other, our connection and bond surpasses time. I appreciate your love and support.

Another special thank-you goes to Tracy, another part of our family. I so appreciate your honesty and how you keep it real. I look forward to the many years ahead for us together.

INTRODUCTION

H ave you ever had the feeling that there must be more to life? Maybe there is something you have always wanted to accomplish, but you never got around to it. Maybe you have a dream, but that dream has never materialized in your life. Do you ever say to yourself, I wish I could’ve been this or done that? Maybe you are like many others, myself included, who have felt that we were meant to do more with our life. Ask yourself why that hasn’t happened. For most of us, it is because we get stuck in our daily lives and never go after that something.

Many people go through life with a mundane routine that takes up each moment of each day, each week, each month, year after year. Our days have become almost programmed to follow the same routine as the previous one. All of us are living in different stages of our lives, but regardless of the stage you are in, you tend to get into a rhythm, a routine that governs what you are doing. Some of us are still in school, preparing for a brighter future. Some of us are working and raising families. And some of us are in our later years, starting to think about how we are going to close out our lives. It does not matter where we are in our lives; the routines in our lives dominate the way we do things.

We get up in the morning, get ourselves ready for the day, put on the same type of clothing, eat the same breakfast day in and day out, get our children ready for school, drive the same route to work, stop at the same coffee shop, get the same venti latte with sweetener with cinnamon mixed in, park in the same parking spot—and that is only the first part of our day. We spend our evenings the same way. We arrive at home and, most of the time, sit on the couch watching the news or the same TV show. Sometimes the most challenging thought we have is, What are we having for dinner? We get wrapped up in our daily activities, but very few of these activities help us to grow as individuals. They have little to no meaning other than maintaining ourselves. They are just things that need to be done.

My point is that we are creatures of habit. Everything we do is habit—everything. Society and our environments are set up that way. Our brains are programmed to repeat the same acts over and over again. We live in a routine-oriented world. It is easier for us, because we don’t have to think too much. Society does that for us.

Now, it is interesting how each of us grows and learns how and what to think along the way from the time we are born. We’ve observed, learned, and grown up to be the people we are, mirroring the morals and ethical practices of the many people who have played an important role in our lives: parents, friends, clergy, and teachers. We were taught right from wrong, how to eat, how to play—basically, how to act and live.

There are many of us who did test our parents’ advice, venturing out and trying things that pushed the limits. Some of us just didn’t agree with what our parents had to say. It wasn’t because we were trying to further our minds; we were just trying to be.

I remember my mother telling me, Eddie, don’t take your bike to the skating rink and leave it outside if it is not locked up. Well, you know, I just had to go and hang out with my friends. I went and left my bike outside unlocked, and of course, it was stolen. That sure was a bonehead move. I had to go home and explain to my mother why I did not have my bike anymore. I got a major scolding—which I did deserve, because I did not listen to her. What most young people don’t realize is that our parents tell us what to do or not to do because they are trying to protect us and teach us certain lessons in life—their lessons. What they don’t realize is that they are just contributing to the perpetual routine and habits of our lives.

Many of us went to whatever places of worship our families went to and listened to someone tell us what was right and wrong based on our religious practices. That same someone told us how we should live and how we would suffer later in the afterlife if we didn’t follow those teachings. If you depend on religion, the way of living is outlined for you to follow. That includes the way you worship, the way you see others in the world, and even the way you marry.

Many people’s jobs are also routine. There are many jobs that just involve routines. Don’t get me wrong: I respect everyone who gets up in the morning and goes to work to make a living. But I do feel sorry for those who go to work and have to perform the same tasks over and over and never have an opportunity to grow, much less be creative or serve with what they do. The sad thing is that there are so many of us who allow ourselves to be that way.

Our lives are full of these routines. And on top of that, we spend so much time wanting to be like the next person, wanting what the other person has, that we never know who we truly are. We lose track. We purposely laugh at the same jokes as people we see as popular, smart, or of a higher status in society. Sometimes, we just want to be accepted.

The rich and famous become our heroes in life. Movie stars and sports celebrities become the people we hold in high regard. We place so much emphasis on the material things in our lives that we forget the very essence of who we are and why we are here. We are not living our lives genuinely. We have become what we have learned from society—whatever society says we should be. We act a certain way, want certain things, and even treat others in a manner that is expected by others. Even those of us who can say we have it good—who have good jobs, make good money, and are able to afford things—live routine lives, because that is what we have been programmed to be and to think.

The funny thing is that many of us believe we are living fulfilled lives: raising a family and holding a higher position in the company we work at. We go through each day doing the same things and thinking that it is okay. Now, I am not saying that’s a bad thing. If that is how you want to live your life, by all means, continue. There is nothing wrong with it as long as you feel fulfilled and are living your life in a manner that makes you feel content with who you are and what you are doing. If you are one of those people, good for you. Keep it up and enjoy.

There are those of us who struggle in life because we have not done the things that connect us to a better way of living, a better way of being. We worry about other people and their opinions rather than being our own people. For some, these struggles started early in life. For others, growing up was more about who we were with respect to our friends and who we were hanging out with. It was more about having fun and doing the things that made us happy at the moment. It surely was not about doing well in school, doing the right thing, learning, or preparing ourselves to meet the challenges of life.

I was the person I just described. I was consumed with being accepted by others. I spent so much time worrying about what others thought of me. You see, I was the fat little boy who was self-conscious about his weight and how his body looked. Yes, I was the boy who had a lot of friends but never a girlfriend. This affected me so much that it drove my life. I focused on winning others’ approval and doing things that I thought would help me gain that acceptance— sometimes doing things that were illegal or wrong.

Some of you may say, I was never one of those students who got into trouble. I studied, did really well in school, and have a good job. I am doing well. For those of you who did do it right, I congratulate you. But I will say that even those who did it right have developed routines. You might have it a little better than most, but your days are still filled with the same activities and routines. It does not matter where you are on the economic food chain; my point is that we all end up in the same machine of life.

We have become clones, conforming to the values, rituals, and habits of others. Why? Because it is a lot easier to let someone else think for us. It is very important for us to be accepted and more important to know we belong. So we compromise ourselves for the sake of others, losing ourselves. We are not sacrificing for the needs of others but are feeding the egos of others. We hold others in such high esteem that we focus our attention on what makes them happy, what gets their attention, and what they want, and we forget who we are.

Let me say that again: we forget who we are. We subconsciously allow ourselves to change our values and beliefs to those of others. We lose our ambition because of others. We give away ourselves and what we believe in so that others will accept us into their little circles and allow us to be a part of their clan or group. Luckily, that does not hold true for most people, but many of us give much of ourselves for the acceptance of others.

Think about it: we will enter a room and see who is in it. We think about who we want to hang out with because we feel they will elevate us in some form or fashion. We also spend a lot of time trying to impress our bosses in order to get some praise for a job well done. We will choose our friends based on what they can bring into our lives instead of what we can bring to theirs. We think about what they have to offer, not what we have to give. We end up selling our souls for the sake of others and what others think instead of living our lives through our genuine selves. We become what others want us to be rather than who we are or can be. Again, we give up our dreams and aspirations.

There are so many factors that contribute to our lives with respect to who we’ve become. The questions remain: What are we doing with our lives? Who are we being? Hopefully, we are being what most will agree to be productive members of society, doing the right things to survive each day, integrating into our communities, working, raising our families, paying our bills, participating in our religious faiths, and maybe even playing an active role in our communities. But the questions must be asked: Are you satisfied with your life? Can you say that your life has meaning?

Now, there is absolutely nothing wrong with living your life in your routine, doing the right thing, cohabitating with others, and living in harmony with the society you live in, if that is what you choose. But unfortunately, there are many who are not able to live a life they are satisfied with. They struggle to meet the basic necessities of life—where to live, where the next meal will come from, or how they are going to pay this month’s bills. Many end up working multiple jobs just to make ends meet. They get up really early in the morning and work a full day, just to turn around and head to another job, barely earning enough to live. They worry about sending their children to school and whether the kids are going to get a good enough education.

Imagine the burden, the stress that comes over those of us who are trying to create a better life for us and those around us. It can be overwhelming and stressful. Problems start to come up between spouses or significant others, and even with their children because of the stress. Eventually, all that stress starts to have an effect on physical and mental well-being. We will talk more about stress in greater detail in a later chapter.

And then there are those who are living a good life, doing the things that make them a productive part of society, yet feeling there is something missing—something that would make life more fulfilling. Some people spend their lives wondering what if. What if I had gotten better grades? What if I had gone a different route? What if I had done things differently? What if I had gone after that job? What if I had met that certain someone?

Maybe it is something that has not yet been accomplished. They feel there is something more, something they are destined to do. It could be a dream of theirs that never really materialized or a gut feeling that there is more to life than what they are doing or experiencing. Or maybe they are stuck working the same job, making the same money, but want to work toward having more. The issue is that no matter what that is, they do not move toward accomplishing it for whatever reason.

Some people get so involved in their lives that they don’t feel they have enough time to work on achieving whatever it is. Others are too worried or scared that they will fail. They come up with every reason or excuse not to go for it. There is no time, not enough money, no preparation, too many obstacles, too many worries about what others will think. And unfortunately, there are those who do not feel worthy of achieving greatness. That comes from believing what others tell us—that we are not good enough, that we don’t have what it takes. Or it could be that our self-esteem is so low that we sabotage ourselves.

For whatever reason, we live year to year wanting more, yearning for more, dreaming of more, but never acting on those feelings, no matter how apparent it is that we were destined for more. We feel paralyzed, unable to take the necessary steps to go after those dreams and take the leap of faith that will bring true fulfillment to our lives.

Wouldn’t it be great if we could take that first step? Wouldn’t it be great if we could find the courage, the knowledge, and the motivation to make a difference in our lives? What will it take to finally get up and make things happen? Will it take courage? Will it take drive? Will it take opportunity? Will it take going back to school? Will it take sacrifice? Will it take letting others help you get the needed advice to finally find the right answers and get the wheels rolling in a new direction? What will it take?

Honestly, it will take all of the above. You must decide what direction you want your life to go toward and find the courage to take the steps. It is going to take a lot of work and determination on your part. It does not matter what you have done up until now. It does not matter what job you have had up until now. It does not matter the things you have done, good or