Confessions of a Bleeding Mind

By Simple Addi

Life and our thoughts, I believe, are split into many segments. Putting them together is what creates the bigger picture. Seeing this masterpiece is hard enough. Describing it is what I believe is what we as writers try to do. Heres a vague attempt.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Jun 16, 2016
• ISBN: 9781524506049

Simple Addi

At age twenty-two, I was diagnosed with alcoholism and schizo affective disorder. I lost a lot as most do in life with or without these. I started writing about things in my life and in my mind. This is a collection of those.

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Confessions of a Bleeding Mind

Simple Addi

Copyright

© 2016 by Elliott Knick.

ISBN:         Softcover         978-1-5245-0605-6

                  eBook              978-1-5245-0604-9

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted

in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system,

without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Rev. date: 06/03/2016

Xlibris

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Contents

Confessions of a bleeding mind

Round 2

Round 3

Thought 1

Thought 2

Thought 3

Thought 4

Thought 5

Thought 6

Thought 7

Thought 8

Thought 9

Thought 10

Thought 11

Thought 12

Thought 13

Thought 14

Thought 15

Thought 16

Thought 17

The Blood Has Pooled

A Foot Print

The Blood Splatter

A Hand Print

Bloody Knife

Broken Mirror

Ink Covered Soul

Let the ink flow

The Pen Glides on the Page

EK’s Chronicles

EK’s Perspectives

Money

Tragedy

Purpose

Love

Invisible

Psyche Ward

Reminisce

Work

Good Times

Car Ride

Time

Confessions of a bleeding mind

I know people around me don’t like this

But I feel so fucking righteous

Throw my hands onto my chest

To feel my lungs compress

Please don’t say to me that you care

Cuz those words just turn to air

And I can hardly feel the breeze

Why’s it so god damn hard to breathe

Bump bump how my heart should beat

But here my heart is stuck to freeze

And my lungs keep pumpin please believe

These words come not from me

But a past life and who I used to be

So sit and watch me bleed

And notice this while you read

How my heart and soul come out this pen

But hey than again

I guess I’m just outta luck

Cuz my heart just got stuck

Watchin my soul turn to ash

And just like time this all will pass

My sanity’s slowly slippin

What the hell am I missin

Is it love? Nope that’s just a lie

Sometimes makes me wanna cry

But I’m all out of tears

Sat down and faced all my fears

But didn’t help just made the pain a little deeper

And the hill I’m on a little bit steeper

Confessions of a bleeding mind

Believe me we’re not hard to find

Just take a look around

And listen for our sound

Thoughts snowball to a vision

Just sit down and listen

Cuz I don’t have 20/20

And sometimes the pictures get fuzzy

They blur a little more each day

I don’t know what else to say

Except they’ve finally beat me

And soon I’ll be lost completely

But wait a minute oh no

I thought I was the brightest soul

I can’t fall through the floor

Into a place no one should go

Please take these thoughts away from me

Give me one more peaceful sleep

But you know I’m gonna lose

No matter what I choose

My destiny’s to die

So please don’t ever cry

That would be one more failure

And my lists already too long to tell ya

So please read my words

And understand that I’m cursed

It’s no one’s fault but mine

And I can take the pain its fine

So knock me down 1 more time

Go ahead and hit me till I bleed

But it’s not my time to leave

So I’ll deal with it once again

Just me and this fucking pen

Round 2

Get these thoughts outta my head

Sometimes I wish I was dead

Hangin on by a thread

Lying in my bed

But it still feels like

Fallin from the roof to a steel spike

And I still might just recover from this mind set

But I do bet

That I’m gonna regret

Being alive and not takin the chance

To quit, but at a glance

It looks like I already have

Then my mind sags

To this bottomless pit

Of despair, oh shit

Maybe I’m already dead

And this is hell trapped in my head

Seems like I’ve lost grip of reality

And one more time man I’m brought to my knees

But then it dawned on me

Finally the clock ticks on me

And with one word I move the cosmos

And with one verse I know what I know

With one song I stop the time

But I’ll start the time

When I’m finished with my rhyme

And once I’m done

Don’t you worry I’ve just begun

To move the stars in my favor

But it’s takin too much labor

I’m gonna stop drinkin

It’s messin with my thinking

Got me doin things

Strange things

That make no sense to me

But it just might be

I found my x factor in women

I got a weakness my mind is swimming

Thoughts of two bodies shinin

Imagining the grinding

The power and passion of lust

Got me caught up

In my own head

Man look what they said

I knew it was all downhill

So I grabbed my sled and still

I guess I forgot the climb back

But luckily I brought my back pack

Full of paxil and seroquel

To pick me up if I should fall

My mom prayin please oh lord

Grant my son pardon from his flaws

Toss his story into the wind

Get a blank book and start again

Rewrite my pages

Have it told by sages

A great tale throughout the ages

But I’m ahead of myself

Sometimes I refuse the help

Cuz my mind is racin

And it’s got me pacin

The same three halls

All these white fucking walls

I trip slip and fall

Off the wagon again

No more happy calls

This is the life I’m livin in

My story soaked in sin

And placed on my conscience

Man this is fucking nonsense

Dreams of bleeding out

These thoughts keep creepin out

Takin their place in my head

While I lie up in bed

Daymares turn to nightmares

All the thoughts comin in pairs

And triplets

Every minute I mean shit

Visions of streams of blood

Fillin my bath tub

And as I gasp and struggle

Until the very last bubble

This thought occurred to me

Man this what’s got to be

Round 3

Get the fuck up

The time is now

Don’t be a bitch stand up

And I know how

Quit the bitchin and the groanin

And get these girls moanin

The intellect has exploded

Time to unload it

Unto the masses

And blow their brains out their asses

Cause my mind is quick

And my lyrics are sick

Too sick to spit