When the Mask Comes Off

By Xlibris US

Brent Blair, Shannell Robinson, and Renee Jones are inseparable. Together, these best friends are making their mark in the fashion industry as colleagues at Blair Records. These three loving parents with strong bonds to one another, their lives, and their friendship will be tested. Lies, secrets, past hurts, and abuse threaten to destroy their lives when God snatches off their masks from where they hide behind. Will they embrace who they really are, or continue to live the lies and deceit to which they have grown accustomed?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Mar 27, 2014
• ISBN: 9781493183692

Book preview

CHAPTER 1

Brent Blair

I sat at my desk in my office, gazing out of the window, remembering where I was in this company four years ago and how much things have changed since then. Here I am, COO of Blair Records, and along with Renee as head designer director. My life has had so many shifts and changes since I’ve started working at the company, some good and some bad, like firing people, which I took no pride in doing.

After my mother and CEO of Blair Records, Ms. Victoria Hayes Blair, found out that I was her son, she promoted me all the way to the top as COO and Renee took my old position from designer to head designer director, I guess since she’s about to become my wife. My promotion took me from $110,000 to $250,000 pay increase, which is great, not to mention that I still have over four million dollars collecting interest in my account.

My life is going quite wonderful right now. I sometimes still have to pinch myself to see whether or not I’m dreaming. I have a beautiful home in Manhattan, New York, with Renee and Brenton, which is only fifteen minutes from my mother’s house. Renee has agreed to marry me, and the wedding is set for next month June 18, seven days before my birthday. I’ve learned how to love Renee as my woman and partner, but it was very difficult, especially trying to pull away from the gay lifestyle that I have grown accustomed to all my life. Trying to pull away from that lifestyle wasn’t the easiest thing to do, but through God’s help and my best friend Elliot Britt, as my powerful prayer partner, it made dealing with that a lot easier.

I’ve seen how much I’ve changed from when I first moved here to New York four years ago to now. I’ve grown into a spiritual man, loving father, devoted spouse, and a caring son. Who would have ever thought I would be a father? My three-year-old son, Brenton Victor Blair, is the joy of my life. He has so much energy, and he is the spitting image of me when I was his age. Gregg and my mother, who raised me, would have been so proud of me to see how well I’m doing here in New York and having a new family as well.

Derrick was supposed to be on his way up to the office so we could get fitted for our tuxedos for the wedding. Derrick had confessed his true feelings to me about how much he’s in love with me and how happy he could make me. I had smiled at Derrick and told him that I was marrying Renee and that my son deserves to have two parents that are married to each other and who is devoted to him. Derrick said that the desire of me liking men was never going to go away, that those thoughts will always be there. I agreed with Derrick, but I told him that I didn’t have to react on those thoughts and that they were only thoughts. Derrick just shook his head at me and said he hoped I know what I’m doing. I stated to him that I did and if I didn’t, that would be my mistake.

My thoughts were interrupted by a knock on my door. Come in, I yelled, as I spun around in my chair. Derrick walked in my office, wearing a brown silk short-sleeved shirt and brown slacks.

What’s up, Brent? Derrick asked.

I’m fine, man, I said, standing from my desk to shake Derrick’s hand.

You ready to go get measured, man? Derrick asked.

Yeah, I am. We should go. I have to go meet Renee with our wedding coordinator this afternoon, I replied.

Okay, let’s roll then, Derrick responded. I grabbed my briefcase and locked my office door, as Derrick and I walked out.

Derrick and I reached the front desk, just as Sandra was coming back from her lunch break. Sandra was our front-desk receptionist and has been with the company for years now. She’s also my best friend Elliot’s ex-fiancée as well. You’re stepping out, Brent? Sandra asked.

Yes, I am. I have to get measured for my tux, I replied.

Okay, Sandra responded.

You remember my friend Officer Derrick Sabb, don’t you? I asked.

Yes, I do. You’re also friends with Elliot too, aren’t you? Sandra asked, as she extended her hand toward Derrick.

Yes, we are, Derrick responded, returning Sandra’s handshake.

Okay, well, Brent, I’ll see you later and, Derrick, it was nice seeing you again, Sandra replied.

As Derrick and I walked out of the building, he let out a sigh. What’s wrong, Derrick? I asked.

That damn girl Sandra is a trip, man. She knows who I am and that El and I are friends, Derrick said.

I know, man. I guess it’s still bothering her after she and Elliot decided to put the wedding on hold for a while when he told her about his attraction to men, I replied.

I guess, but that bitch better not take her frustration out on me ’cuz her man don’t want her ass no fucking more! Derrick declared with an attitude.

Derrick, please, with all that cursing, man. You know I don’t curse anymore, I replied.

I’m sorry, Brent, I forgot. It’s amazing how a good woman can help change a man, huh, or a good man, Derrick said, smiling. I ignored Derrick’s cocky-ass smile as he gave his sly comment.

Derrick and I walked up to my new burgundy 2010 Mercedes. Brent, I’m really loving this car, man. You can tell that Blair Records is paying a playa good money, huh? Derrick smirked.

I’m the COO of the company, so what d’you think? I responded.

Yeah, I know, Derrick replied.

Derrick and I tried on our black tuxedos in the back. The manager, Warren Sharpe, was very helpful in making sure we had everything we needed and that we were fitted just right. Warren was about five foot ten, one hundred eighty pounds, medium frame, brown skinned, and had wavy hair. He had a slight gap between his two front teeth but handsome, and he flirted with Derrick the entire time. I smiled as Derrick acted like he wasn’t interested at all.

I stood looking at myself in the mirror as I fixed my bow tie. The tuxedos were black, with a teal blue vest and bow tie. I noticed I was smiling as I was posing in the mirror. Wow, I can’t believe I’m getting married, I said to myself. Derrick came out of the fitting room and noticed me smiling to myself.

Boy, what the hell are you smiling about? Derrick asked.

That I’m getting married next month, Dee. Who would’ve ever thought this would be happening? I said. Derrick just looked at me but didn’t say a word.

Warren came in the back area where Derrick and I were. Which one of you gentlemen is getting married? Warren asked.

I am, I responded.

Yeah, he’s the fool that’s making the biggest mistake of his life, Derrick said as he headed back in the fitting room. Warren stretched his eyes and walked back out of the fitting area. I knocked on the fitting room door that Derrick was in. What! Derrick yelled, as if he was angry.

Can you please come out here for a second? I asked, wanting to ask Derrick what his damn problem was. Derrick opened the fitting room door and looked me straight in the eye. Look, I know you have your doubts about me marrying Renee, but this isn’t your decision to make, nor am I asking you for your advice. This wedding is going to take place, whether you’re there or not, I said.

Brent, I can’t let you make the biggest mistake of your life, Derrick responded.

It’s not a mistake, Derrick. I love Renee, and there’s nothing you can say or do for that to change. We are getting married next month, and that’s it, I responded.

Derrick didn’t say anything; he just looked at me with a confused look on his face. I saw the tears that settled in Derrick’s eyes. Brent, what about me? What’s gonna happen to us once you get married? Derrick asked, as if he was a child begging for attention from me.

What do you mean what will happen to our friendship? I’m not going anywhere, man, I responded.

But I love you, Brent, and I need you, Derrick said, as he grabbed my face and tried to kiss me. I pushed Derrick away from me.

I love you too, Derrick, just not like that. Maybe things would have been different if Renee and I weren’t together, but we are. You and I are friends, and that’s it, I said sternly.

Are you ready to go? Derrick asked.

Yes, I’m ready, I responded. Derrick and I walked back into our fitting rooms to change out of our tuxedos.

On our way back to the office, Derrick didn’t say a word. Derrick, you’re real quiet all of a sudden, I said.

Brent, I think it’s best if I won’t be at your wedding. I can’t watch the man I love marry someone else. It’s not right, Derrick responded.

Is that how you feel, Dee? I asked.

Yes, it is, Brent, Derrick responded, looking out of the window on the passenger side of my car. I respected Derrick’s decision even though I didn’t like it. I knew Derrick liked me, but I never knew just how much until now. For the rest of the ride back to the company, Derrick sat in silence and I didn’t say anything as well. I figured he needed this quiet time to himself, and I did as well.

CHAPTER 2

Renee Jones

B rent and I arrived to meet Ms. Everlyn Capers at Shai’s restaurant to discuss our wedding. Ms. Everlyn is a small-framed brown-skinned woman with a short haircut that’s dyed black and blond. She wore a peach-and-white pantsuit, with a royal blue blouse underneath, which looked good together.

Hello, you must be Renee Jones and Brent Blair, Ms. Everlyn asked, extending her hand toward us.

Yes, I’m Renee Jones, and this is my fiancé Brent Blair, I replied, shaking hands with Ms. Everlyn.

"Brent, are you the Brent Blair that was on the cover of last month’s edition of Ebony magazine, as New York’s finest man for Blair Records?" Ms. Everlyn asked.

Yes, that would be me, Brent replied, smiling.

Oh okay, well, nice to meet you both. Please join me for dinner, Ms. Everlyn said.

Brent and I both pulled up a chair from another table to join Ms. Everlyn. The waiter walked up to ask what we were drinking. Brent and I both said iced tea and that we weren’t having dinner. I wasn’t hungry since Shannell and I had a big lunch earlier today. Is that all you two are getting? Ms. Everlyn asked.

Yes, for me, I replied, and Brent just nodded his head. Brent was very antisocial, but I understood since we were only going to be talking about wedding things and nothing he could really relate to.

We listened as Ms. Everlyn showed us a wedding album and suggested a few things to us. Everything sounded good to me as I continued to look through the album. I wasn’t going to sit here all day and listen to this woman like I had nothing else to do today. Brent was looking like he was going to fall asleep. I hit his knee with mine, and he stretched his eyes and then smiled at me. I knew he was getting tired, and I wasn’t about to let him sit through this with me.

Ms. Everlyn, I will talk with you more about the wedding tomorrow, okay? Today has been a long day for us, I replied.

Okay, Renee. Well, call me tomorrow around 10:00 a.m., Ms. Everlyn replied.

I sure will, I said.

Well, nice meeting you both, Ms. Everlyn said, extending her hand toward us once again.

You too, Ms. Everlyn, Brent and I responded.

Brent and I arrived home, and Brenton ran straight to his daddy’s arms. Brent lifted up Brenton and hugged and kissed him tightly. I smiled as I saw the two most important people in my life expressing love to each other. I’m glad I was able to give my baby a son. Brent would tell me every day how happy he was to be marrying me and how proud he was to be a father. I know we mean a lot to Brent, but I wonder sometimes that had Brent known what I’ve done in order to be with him, he probably would never trust me again and he would definitely leave me.

Brent took Brenton to the couch, carrying him on top of his shoulders while Brenton had his arms up in the air, enjoying the fact of being so far up in the air.

Brenton, what about me? You didn’t tell Mommy hey, I said.

Go give Mommy a hug and a kiss, Brenton, Brent said.

Hey, Mommy, Brenton said, smiling and giving me a hug and a peck on the lips. After Brenton hugged and kissed me, he ran back over to his father immediately.

Brenton, where’s Mrs. Linda? I asked.

Mrs. Linda is potty, Mommy, Brenton replied.

Mrs. Linda came out of the restroom. Hello, Ms. Renee and Mr. Brent, Mrs. Linda said.

Hello, Mrs. Linda, Brent and I replied at the same time.

Mrs. Linda, is dinner ready yet? I asked.

Yes, Ms. Renee, it is. I’m going to set the table right now, Mrs. Linda responded.

Okay, I replied. Mrs. Linda was our housekeeper-nanny, and she has been here with us since Brenton was two months old. Brent loved her though I think she was lazy, but she was good with Brenton and he seemed to love her as well. Mrs. Linda was about five foot three and 175 pounds. She’s a little on the heavy side and had brown skin, with long silky black hair. Brent and I asked her to wear a hairnet when she’s preparing food. Last month, she had made pasta, and I found a long piece of hair in my food and I pitched a fit. Brent told me to calm down, and we talked with Mrs. Linda about that. We haven’t had any more problems with that since.

After dinner, I went upstairs to take my shower. Mrs. Linda prepared lasagne and tossed salad for dinner. She did a great job with it. I might have some complaints about certain things Mrs. Linda does, but her cooking wasn’t one of them. Oh yes, the sista knows she can throw it down in the kitchen. I left Brent and Brenton playing with the blocks on the den floor. Brent was such a good father and spouse to me. He always said that he wasn’t going to be anything like his father to our son. Brent was so cautious about everything he did with Brenton, even down to disciplining him. He let him slide with things that he shouldn’t, and when I would say something to him, he simply ignores me. I had to remind him about what the good Bible says, Raise a child up in the way they should go, and when they are grown, they will not depart, because I definitely beat his butt when he got out of hand. Just like my mother and father did with me and my siblings.

After my shower, I put on my nightclothes and went downstairs to check on Brent and Brenton. Brenton was lying on Brent’s chest with his thumb in his mouth, and they were both asleep. I ran back to the room and got my digital camera to take their picture. This was a moment I knew I wanted to cherish forever. How lucky I was to be marrying such a wonderful man. Brent really loved me, and I loved him. He meant everything to me, and I wondered, if I never had Brenton, would he still feel this way about me? Probably not; that’s why I was glad I did what I did. Now I had Brent all to myself without any worries. I was not even concerned about the gay lifestyle that he’s left behind.

I started snapping my camera to capture this Kodak moment. I guess the flash from the camera woke Brent. What are you doing, little lady? Brent asked.

Taking your picture, baby, I replied.

Why are you taking my picture, Renee? Brent asked.

I just couldn’t resist taking it when I saw you holding our son on your chest. I just had to take the picture, I responded, smiling.

You silly, pretty lady. I’m going to put our son in the bed and get in the shower, Brent said.

Okay, I replied.

I went back upstairs and grabbed my diary from the nightstand and opened it with my special key that I guarded with my life. I couldn’t let my most hidden dark secrets leak out for Brent to read. He’s never tried tampering with it because I would be able to tell by the lock on it. I think he trusted me as well as I trusted him.

I started writing in my diary when Brent grabbed his things and walked toward the bathroom. You and that diary, Renee. Do you ever write anything in there about me? Brent asked.

Maybe, handsome, I responded, smiling.

Better be good things too, baby, Brent said.

Of course, there are good things, handsome. I would never write anything bad about you because I have nothing bad to write about, I said. Brent smiled and got in the shower.

Dear Diary,                    May 15, 2010

Today was a good day for me. I had a good day at work and a great lunch with my best friend Nell from church. We talked about a lot and I’m glad Nell is my maid of honor at my wedding. Nell and I have been best friends since we met at church four years ago through Brent and her son Christopher. Christopher took a strong interest in Brent as a father figure since he had no strong male role models in his life, so Brent and I adopted Christopher and his sister Shaneya into our family as our little niece and nephew. They are both very sweet kids, and they think the world of Brent and me. They call us Auntie Renee and Uncle Brent. God has blessed me with a best friend and wonderful children that look up to me.

Brent and I met Ms. Everlyn Capers today, our wedding coordinator. Ms. Everlyn is a nice lady but a bit boring and long-winded. She did have some good ideas about our wedding next month. Brent and I decide on teal blue, lavender and silver as our wedding colors. I saw those colors in a bouquet before and they blended in so nicely, and I knew I wanted those to be my wedding colors as well. Brent pretty much decided to let me do whatever I wanted to do with the wedding. We decided to have five bridesmaids and five groomsmen, a best man and a maid of honor, and of course, Brenton is going to be the ring bearer. Christopher is going to be the one that pulls out the red carpet down the aisle, and Shaneya is my flower girl. My two oldest sisters Janet and Atrice are coming down to be my bridesmaids as well as three of my closest first cousins. I’m so excited that I can hardly wait for June 18.

Brent just walked out of the shower with some red briefs on and looking just as fine and sexy as the first day I laid eyes on him. I remember that day like it was yesterday, when I walked into my former boss Ms. Kelley Boyd’s office and there he was, sitting as fine as ever. Brent took my breath away, and I knew at that very moment that I would make him mine and I did whatever I had to do to make that happen. I watched Brent with our son and how much he treasures being a father, and it brought a little discomfort to my heart, knowing how I deceived him. I’m not proud of what I’ve done by any means. I just had to do something quick to ensure myself that Brent would end up with me and not that Michael person that hurt him before. I think if I had to do it all over again, I would do the same thing in order to get the man I love.

The End

CHAPTER 3

Shannell Robinson

I just finished up on the treadmill after a thirty-minute jog and was now drenched down in sweat. I stood up in the mirror at the gym, admiring my weight loss and proud of my accomplishment. As I wiped the sweat from my forehead, I couldn’t believe where I started from to where I am now. Here I am, a thirty-year-old mother to an eight-year-old son, Christopher, and a ten-year-old daughter, Shaneya Robinson. I’m a single mother of two children, whom I love dearly and who both mean the world to me. They’re all I have, and I’d been asking God for a miracle to send me a good man to be in their lives and mine as well. I wanted someone to love me for me and accept my children as being gifts from God and not something that they’re stuck with but love them unconditionally. God has shared with me that before he sends me someone, I have to first learn to love myself before anyone can love me.

For some reason, I’d always been uncomfortable with myself and my weight. I’d always been somewhat of a big girl, but this year was different for me. I decided to do something about my weight and my self-esteem, on how I viewed myself. I made up my mind to join a gym around the first of the year and joined New Life Fitness gym, a gym my best friend Brent referred me to. I worked closely with my personal trainer, Antonio Davis, who trained me and helped me from a size 18 to a size 10 in about three months. I lost fifty-five pounds altogether, and now I feel like I have a real chance in life, a life I’ve always wanted for myself.

Life has been a little hard for me after my son’s father died when I was pregnant with him from gang-related activities and I had to move in with my grandparents to raise my son and Neya. Now my life has turned around drastically since I met my best friend Brent Blair and his girlfriend Renee Jones through my son. I remember when Brent invited me over three years ago for Thanksgiving dinner at his mother’s house, Ms. Victoria Hayes Blair, founder and CEO of Blair Modeling Entertainment Records. I never dreamed that having dinner with them would change my entire life the way it did, but my life took a turnaround like never before. Vicki and her guest were admiring my pink pantsuit that I made and designed, and when I told them that I made and designed it myself, they almost fell over. Vicki offered me a job on the spot as a designer. I went from making $18,000 a year as a cashier at Walmart to almost $100,000 in something I have always wanted to do. I was able to move out of my trashy drug-infested duplex into a beautiful three-bedroom town house in Manhattan.

Everything in my life was going just fine, especially since I met Omar Tyrese Gamble. Omar was thirty-four years old, six feet tall, one hundred seventy pounds, with a slim, muscular frame. He was light skinned and had dark wavy hair. Omar was quite handsome, with light green eyes and a smile that would just melt you just by looking at him. We met at the gym while working out on the treadmills right beside each other. At first, I was surprised that Omar approached me, but he did. I figured I wasn’t his type, but he told me he likes thick dark-skinned girls. That was three months ago before I lost all my weight. We’d been dating pretty heavy now for about three months, and I loved him dearly. God had sent a fine man like Omar to love me and my children. Chris bonded with Omar right away, but it took Neya a little longer to do so but she finally came around. Omar was the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I was thinking about asking him to move into the town house with us. Maybe God has sent me a husband after all.

Omar was an engineer at a chemical plant here in New York. Brent and Renee had been asking when they will get the pleasure of meeting Mr. Omar Gamble. I told them soon, but I was not sure yet about that. I’d always been the type to keep my friends away from my man as much as possible. They might have something negative to say about Omar and I might go off on them or something, but they’ll meet him one day when the time is right.

I grabbed my stuff and hit the locker rooms to shower up to see Omar. I got fully dressed and was on my way to Omar’s house. He lived in a big one-level house in Long Island, about twenty minutes from mine. His house was very nice, and I was wondering that if Omar and I were to get married, who would give up his or her house to move in with the other one? We would have to see about that. There was one thing that I wished Omar would do that he doesn’t, which is have sex with me. It’s been a long time since I’d been with someone sexually, and when Omar came into my life, I immediately got moist in places that I almost forgot exist and I desired him in ways that a woman desires her man. It could be the slightest thing such as watching him eat his dinner or just watching TV that would have my hormones raging through the roof and I wanted to rip every inch of his clothes off him.

I knocked on Omar’s door and waited for him to come to the door. Who is it? Omar yelled out.

Shannell, I responded.

Hold on, let me throw on some clothes right quick, Omar responded. I waited for a few minutes before Omar came to the door in some brown basketball shorts and with no shirt on.

Damn! I said under my breath. Omar nearly took my breath away when I saw his fine body and his washboard abs, with redness in his eyes from apparently just waking up.

Hey, baby, Omar said.

Hey, Omar, how are you doing? I asked as I walked into the house and went into Omar’s den. Omar followed behind me and sat on the couch next to me.

How’s your day, baby? Omar asked, as he gave me a big hug.

Oh, everything is fine, baby, I responded as I returned Omar’s hug.

Good, baby, Omar replied.

You just got up, Omar? I asked.

Yes, I did. I was a little tired from working today, Omar responded. He got up from the couch and turned on the TV. Is there anything in particular you want to watch, Nell? Omar asked.

No, whatever you’re watching is good with me, I replied. Omar sat back next to me and put his arm around me. I placed my head against Omar’s chest, and I gently touched his face and then kissed him on the cheek. Omar returned my kiss, and I wanted him badly. I wanted him to make love to me, and I needed it badly. Omar lifted his head from our kiss.

What’s wrong, baby? I asked.

Oh nothing, let’s just watch what’s on TV, Omar said.

Omar, I want us to make love. I want you, baby, I said as I touched Omar’s face, about to kiss him again. Omar quickly turned his head and acted like he didn’t want to kiss me or make love. I didn’t say another word, nor did I try to pursue Omar. I just sat up in the couch and allowed Omar to just hold me like he wanted to. I wondered what’s wrong with me. Was Omar attracted to me or not? Or was something really going on with him that he’s not telling me about? Whatever it was, he just shattered my heart in a million little pieces.

CHAPTER 4

The Bachelor Party

I t was the day before the wedding, and I was excited about it. I couldn’t believe I was going to actually be somebody’s groom, a husband. I was marrying a woman who loved me for me despite my flaws and imperfections and my past attraction to men. Renee was definitely my hero, the strongest woman I know. She saw the best in me when I didn’t see it in myself, and she chose to love me anyway. I’m so in love with this woman for being there for me when I felt like I was in this world all alone after Kenny died on me. Renee is such a good, honest, beautiful, loving woman; fiancée; mother; and friend to everyone she comes in contact with. God couldn’t have given Brenton a better mother or me a better woman to love than Renee. The more I talked about her, the more I could go on and on about her good qualities. I was truly a lucky man to be marrying Renee.

I sat down in the living room, thinking about my wedding tomorrow. I just couldn’t believe I’m getting married and to a woman too. My father and mother, who raised me, would be flipping over in their graves to know this. My father would be more devastated than my mother. My mother just wanted me to be happy, and whoever made me happy was just fine with her. I often thought about Gregg, my former deceased lover, who died in that car accident six years ago. I wondered how he would feel, knowing that I’m marrying a woman. I wondered if he would support me or walk away if he was alive, like Derrick did. Gregg was the type that as long as you’re happy, then he’s happy. He once told me that if something was to happen to him, I should move on and allow myself to love again and allow them to love me in return. I often thought about him when I was alone in my office or watching his favorite show on TV.

I got up and got a bottle of water from the refrigerator, just as my cell phone began to ring. I looked at the caller ID as I picked up my cell phone off the coffee table. It was Derrick’s phone number. Hello, I said.

Hey, Brent, what’s up? Derrick asked.

What’s going on, man? I responded.

Aren’t you going to your bachelor party or something tonight? Derrick asked.

Man, shut the hell up! You know you’re my best man and you’re supposed to be in charge with throwing me a bachelor party until you cancelled out on me, I said as I raised my voice with him.

I know, Brent, and I’m sorry for that. I should have never reacted the way I did. Please forgive me, Derrick said.

Cool, I said. It was no big deal to me because with a bachelor party or without one, I was still getting married tomorrow at 3:00 p.m.

I continued listening to Derrick as he talked on the phone. Look, let me pick you up and we can chill out at my crib tonight, and I’ll bring you back tomorrow morning so you can get ready for your wedding that afternoon, Derrick said.

At first, I hesitated, but I didn’t have anything else to do since I was going to be home by myself tonight. Renee was going to be at Nell’s house having a bridal party and Brenton was over at Mom’s house, so I should just go ahead. Yeah, that sounds good, I said.

Cool, Brent, so I’ll be over in about thirty minutes, Derrick replied.

Okay, I said.

I hung up the phone with Derrick and threw on some jeans and a T-shirt. I sat back down in the living room and watched a little TV. My favorite show Law & Order was on. I was really into the show when my cell phone began to ring. I looked at the caller ID and saw that it was Renee calling me.

Hello, I answered.

Hey, baby, Renee said.

Hey, Renee, what’s up? How’s the bridal shower coming along? I asked.

Oh, it doesn’t start until about five o’clock, but I’m ready to get all this over with so I can marry my baby tomorrow afternoon, Renee said.

So you really want to marry me after all? I asked, wanting to make sure Renee didn’t change her mind.

Of course, I do. Why would you ask something like that, Brent? Are you having cold feet? Renee asked.

No, I’m not. I just wanted to make sure you’re not having cold feet and you still want to go through with the wedding, I said.

Yes, I do. I love you, Brent, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you, Renee said.

I know, baby, and I love you too. Are you coming back home tonight? I asked.

Yeah, I’ll probably just grab a few things and spend the night at Nell’s and get ready from here tomorrow, Renee replied.

Okay, well, I’m heading over to Derrick’s house when he gets here. He didn’t throw a party or anything, but he invited me over to hang out a little before my big day tomorrow, I said.

Okay, sounds nice. Well, I’ll let you go, Renee said.

After I hung up the phone with Renee, I took my wheat-colored Timberland boots by the couch and put them on and just laid my head on the arm of the couch. Just as I got comfortable, the doorbell rang. Who is it? I asked.

Derrick, Derrick responded. I opened the door. What’s up, Brent? Derrick asked as he walked into the den.

I’m fine, I said as Derrick gave me a quick hug.

You ready, B.? Derrick asked.

Yeah, let’s ride, I responded.

I got inside Derrick’s gray 2008 Chevy Impala, removing stuff from my feet. Derrick had bought this car last year, but he keeps it so junky with empty water bottles and unopened bills and letters all over the place. Boy, don’t you ever clean up this junky car? I asked.

Man, shut up, B. This is my junky car, and you don’t have to drive it, just ride and chill the hell out, all right, Derrick said. Derrick can be nasty when he wants to be, but I’m used to his rude, cocky attitude. I guess it comes along with him being a police officer.

Derrick loved listening to his rap music. He actually had his music up so loud that I thought he was trying to bust my eardrums. Yo, B., you heard that new 50 Cent man? Derrick asked.

Naw, man, you know I only listen to R & B and gospel and not that rap mess, I said.

Damn, B., you have really changed on a brotha. I remember that all you used to listen to was rap music and now you’ve gotten all holy on me. Ms. Holy Kneeling-Down-at-the-Altar Renee changed you, huh? I swear it’s amazing how some pussy can change a brotha and make them pussy whipped, Derrick replied with a smirk on his face. I looked at Derrick but ignored his sick, twisted comment.

Derrick and I pulled up to his brownstone apartment. Derrick has a really nice place and in a nice area of Brooklyn too. I sat down on the white leather couch in Derrick’s living room next to Derrick. Where’s Kevin, Derrick? I asked.

Oh, Kevin is with my parents this weekend, Derrick responded.

Oh okay, I replied.

Would you like something to drink, B.? Derrick asked.

Yeah, that’s fine, I said.

What would you like? Derrick asked.

Do you have some wine? I asked.

Naw, I have some Coronas though, Derrick said, laughing.

That’s fine, man, I replied. Derrick got up from the couch and walked into the kitchen. Can I turn the TV on, Derrick? I asked.

Yeah, man, that’s fine, Derrick replied. I turned the TV on to Law & Order. "Boy, I know damn well you’re not about to watch Law & Order on your only night as a free single man," Derrick said.

What else is there to watch, Derrick? I asked.

I have plenty of things for us to watch, man, Derrick responded as a wicked smile came across his face.

Derrick brought two bottles of Coronas over to the couch. Here you go, dawg, Derrick said, as he handed me an unopened Corona and then a bottle opener.

Why didn’t you just open the beer for me, man? I asked.

’Cuz I know how you are about people bringing you your drink with it already opened, so to avoid you looking all around the bottom of the bottle, I just brought you the beer unopened, Derrick said.

Man, you’re a trip, I replied, taking the beer and the bottle opener from Derrick. Wow, I couldn’t believe Derrick remembered how skeptical I was about my unopened drinks since Antrone and Scott did what they did four years ago when they tried to drug me.

That one Corona had me pretty much mellowed out and a little more relaxed than I was already. Brent, I have something for you to look at, man, Derrick said, getting up and heading to the back.

What is it, man? I asked.

Wait and see, Brent, damn! Derrick replied.

Derrick returned with a DVD in his hand and placed it in the DVD player. What is that you’re putting in there, Derrick? I asked.

Derrick turned and looked at me and rolled his eyes. Boy, wait and see, Derrick said.

I hope this fool isn’t putting something in there that he shouldn’t be, I thought to myself. Derrick pressed Play and sat back down beside me on the couch. I waited for the movie to play, and what did Derrick have in there but no other than a gay porno movie with five black men gang-raping a little feminine dude on a pool table. I knew Derrick was up to something by how suspicious he was acting all of a sudden.

I realize this was Derrick’s place and I couldn’t tell him what to do, but I felt uncomfortable watching this with him and especially since I knew how he felt about me. Derrick, can you please take this out? I asked.

Naw, man. Is it bothering you, B.? Derrick asked.

Well, it’s making me feel uncomfortable and I’m going to walk out if you don’t, I said.

Damn, boy, I swear you act like this shit don’t cross your mind anymore since you’re about to tie the knot, Derrick said, as he got up and took the DVD out.

What the hell was this fool thinking doing some mess like this? I thought to myself. I didn’t say anything for a while; I was just amazed by Derrick’s