A Blessing in Disguise

By Nathan Simmons

A Blessing In Disguise is the story of a man which contain a message. The story is necessary to show how ordinary a man can be from the start of life, how only the here and now is important. Once his ego surface, not only the here and now are important, but the past and the future becomes essential.

The conclusion that ones history is only about four hundred years old leaves him without a foundation, and we only search our past for direction into the future. A four hundred year old past bring the future to an haw. A void appears, the search ends, the ego is deflated, the man is incomplete, an endangered species.

The message I received was short and to the point, If you want to know something , read The Bible. The Word, told a story about the history of mankind from the beginning, I only needed to know which man would represent my history, and the choice of the three was not minds.

The message was truly a blessing, but one not only for me. I was born again, not only had I discovered a past not known to me but I also discovered a future to one day be granted.

To understand who I have become you too must read and study The Word. Until the world acknowledge and accept who I Am, there will be no blessings, no harmony, no peace. We must put a stop to hiding The Word of God before there is nothing left but The Word.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Oct 22, 2003
• ISBN: 9781477162613

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Copyright © 2003 by Nathan Simmons.

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CONTENTS

MY CREATION

CHAPTER 1

CHAPTER 2

CHAPTER 3

CHAPTER 4

CHAPTER 5

CHAPTER 6

MY CREATION

IN THE BEGINNING THE CREATOR WAS THE CREATION

THE ETERNAL WITHOUT BEGINNING OR END

THE ORIGINAL ORIGINATOR

VERY GREAT WHO HAS POWER WITHIN

UNCHANGABLE IN HOLINESS

JUSTICE

TRUTH

WISDOM

THUS BEGINS THE EVOLUTION OF HIS HEAVENLY KINGDOM

CREATED WAS THE SUN

CENTRALIZER

ORGANIZER UNDER ONE CONTROL

THE FOCAL POINT OF ALL ACTIVITY

I AM TOLD

MAN

AN IMAGINABLE CREATURE

ONCE EXISTING ONLY IN THE CREATOR’S IMAGINATION

IMITATED TO FORM FROM NATURE WITH A GOOD EXPLANATION

A REPRESENTATIVE OF THE CREATOR

CREATED TO BE MASTER ON EARTH

TO ALL THINGS NATURE WOULD BIRTH

THE CREATOR WAS GREATLY EXCITED

AND ADMIRED THAT WHICH WAS SO LOVABLE

THE HEAVENLY BODIES WERE BLESSED WITH LOVE

BEAUTIFIED AND MADE ADORABLE

THE CREATOR WAS CONTENT

ENJOYED THE CREATION BEAUTIFUL SIGHTS

EXCLUSIVELY THE SOLE POSSESSOR OF THE HEAVENLY BODIES

THIS HE LIKED

MAN WAS FIRST PERFECTLY PURE

HE WAS IMMACULATE AND IMMATURE

LOVE

WISDOM

KNOWLEDGE OF THE STARS

THUS STARTED THE QUEST FOR THAT IN THE SKY ABOVE

HE SEEKS HER AS SILVER

UNTIL THE END

UNTIL PROVEN OTHERWISE

HE WILL ONLY FIND THAT

ALL

ALL BUT ONE IS FROM THE DUST

ALL

ALL BUT ONE WILL TURN TO DUST AGAIN

My name is Nathan Simmons. Until you get to know more of or about me, you can think of me as an ordinary Human Being like yourself; I am in flesh and blood. Sathan is a word I thought, I made up, for as you can see I dropped the N from Nathan, and added the S from Simmons.

As I dug deeper, I found this spelling to be obsolete, meaning: no longer in general use, esp., out of use for at least a century. During my search of self, I was led to Sathan: it was as if all of this was meant to be. It seems as though my whole life was leading to one thing, and that is that I might be just that, Sathan.

As a kid I one time actually had to give serious thought to the question, am I a Spirit of Evil. If I am, we’re talking about the discovery of a known Personality, Satan, but which has never been experienced, or should I say, exposed to the public as he is or may be. I didn’t create myself, but I do know of Myself, The Reincarnation of Lucifer, but believe me, I’m not what might be known of me.

I am a Religious fanatic, and there is absolutely nothing within this Universe that can be done about it, or it wouldn’t exist. So now I think, there is no reason for me to hide Myself from others, everyone will be known. Who are you?

Before I ever realized that I had a name, not the names are not important, I knew thought, which is beyond all physical importance. I am therefore Thought more than any thing else. In other words, my real identity, exact likeness in nature or quality, could have been kept secret. The time is just here and this no longer has to be kept beyond ordinary human understanding.

Regardless of how I think Myself to be, and or what title I give myself, I did not create Myself, physically or mentally, and I had nothing to do with anything concerning my coming into existing as opposed to nonexistence.

I am here, and now. My being willing to reveal this information has come surprisingly, so if I’m not available physically to some, it is because I could be misunderstood by you, but you do know that I exist, and now, regardless of who I am.

Please, I am not to be feared, for it is I who is along. I have dwelt here for thirty-six Earth years and you have known me not. Read, decide for yourself; Sathan, Message or Messiah.

CHAPTER 1

One thing we all know for sure, when we think about it, we had no say whatsoever in the fact of our coming to Being. We had no knowledge or awareness of the transition that took place. No choice of ancestor, date of birth, sex and especially no choice of Nature, which seems to leave me no choice in life period.

Now when I consider the nature of the ant, the bee, the spider, and even the serpent, I think their nature is the only thing known to them, to each and everyone according to his nature. Even in the beginning, and during man’s known and unknown existence, through famine, floods and wars, they still live day by day and do only things known to them, and the evolutionary process continues.

If I am to concur that I also have a Nature, to know this nature is by far the most important thing in my life. What would you do if you were I, having thought like I have? What am I to be but who I am? Was I created for a certain purpose, and if so, am I destined to living and thinking in this same manner? Where is there to hide? How can you hide from what is to be, but how do you go on not really knowing what lies ahead.

How do you go on living day by day wondering about the end of a thing, and what do we know of our ending anyway? Or is there an end? Can I really think that I’m to live indefinitely? That is the only conclusion, not knowing if and where the end of life exist, and if the end of life does exist, then life still exists once it’s over, or start. You tell me what’s going on here.

Darkness may have been my first fear, and I was probably so glad to see the light that I forgot the nine months of lonely seclusion. It wasn’t long before the light brought the pain of birth. The only thing I can think of that the two may have in common, darkness and pain, is the fact that I dislike them both. I knew something was wrong from that moment on, The Light.

I think it’s barbaric the way they start communication with a newborn child. As for me, I’m sure I related to earliest man in that I could think and feel, but I had no words to express self with, I couldn’t talk, but was very conscious, with no way to share. It’s like being in a dream, for without communication, dreams and reality seem to be the same.

What can we say about a thing, our birth, that we know must have happened to us, but there is no recollection of that moment. It’s a part of us we can never have total knowledge of, Our Past.

I know every man has wondered about himself. Wondered who, what, when, where and why the seed of man began, just like I have wondered.

Life occurred long before anyone was aware of it. Understanding this, we realize our past has become unknown to us, then there’s the nine months before we become visible to the eye, its now that they know your sex.

I wonder when do we become aware. Can we really remember today what was the thought on our mind? Maybe not, many things could have happened to you even before you were aware of your own situation. For it was with me, physical existence of something that occurred, that I have no recollection of the moment. And he had on his vesture and on his thigh a name written, KING OF KINGS, AND LORD OF LORDS. Is this what it really is?

How far back can we recollect a time that we can classify as our earliest awareness of self, an awakening? I woke to life with some very pleasant thoughts. As far back as my mind can recollect, my first life experience was one of beauty. There were all the things in life that you could ask for, love, peace, and beauty. A moment in life that gave pleasures that were deeply satisfying to the mind. A moment that can be enjoyed repeatedly because I must have realized then, as I do now, that this moment was a profoundly tender one, containing the elements of Love; passion, affection and attachment. I was in a state of harmony, and everything around me seemed to have been silenced. There was stillness in my atmosphere, as if the moment not only had an effect on me, but all that there was, and that is the beauty of the moment; Totality.

But, there was no action to contribute to the thoughts, which had both a physical and psychological affect. The moment, or that experience has carried me through this life. Maybe it’s my Foundation. There was a need for another with the desire to take from her as much as to give to her, one not out weighing the other, for it takes the two to balance the halves that man and woman are without the other. Not one alone but halves alone, for it takes the two of them to make one.

This moment was the Birth of the Consciousness, inwardly and outwardly. A moment that brought some understanding into my life, a life that before that moment needed no understanding. The thought that I don’t control my own self, but instead I’ve been given a nature that has been perfectly equipped with the essentials of life. A nature, it seems, is not changeable.

I know that I was given, at that moment, a very powerful quality, Love. I had loved to know, experience, and love to give. I did understand this love I had which lead me to realize that my love was a gift for another, also, that love which I am to receive, is that which gives meaning and purpose to life. Love I knew was something never to be fully understood. Understanding what I understood about love, I knew that I would really appreciate love, once I met her again. Knowing that the moment would bring two people together, whom will, I think, spontaneously experience her (LOVE) element. This very thought is Cherished.

Judging from a number of things, location and other events, I can place my age at about twenty-four months plus. To think one would experience love before all else, and while so young. My Oldest Memory.

Once I had realized that I was, and the oldest known memory and life experience was recorded, I wonder now, how many times did I go through with this moment? I put it like that because; I think I woke everyday after that, looking for the same moment or the same girl. It was as if this was all I had to look forward to, and so far as I’m concerned now, that was all I knew, so how could I think of anything else. Thank God for that moment, because things were coming so fast afterward, that they may have taken me into shock. You see, once this moment was realized, life automatically became a mystery. Can you imagine experiencing love and not even know that you exist, or if you did, nothing had mattered before that moment.

Well, that old saying out of sight, out of mind, sure had its affect on me an that relationship. I moved, just one street over and a few blocks down, but this was like a whole new world to me.

The thought of my first love lasted for a long time, but with moving came new sights and new people. I was growing fast and starting to wonder about a lot of things, now that I knew thought and had been taken away from the one thing I thought of. It seemed as if I would never see her again, so I moved on in thought, but with something to always remember.

The part of town we had moved to was known as The Alley. Known by this name, I believe, because of the arrangement of the houses and the car size streets that lead to the houses that sat behind the ones out front. Why they call this part of town The Alley, I don’t really know because there was other areas in town built in this very same manner.

Not knowing of any other area, this one was fine with me. I really liked that house and I believe to this day, that house is the reason why I want a wooden home today. I was being conditioned to a certain lifestyle, that it seemed good for me.

Our house sat out front, and it was twice the size of some of the others, and we had a streetlight out front, which kept me out of total darkness when all the house lights were out. This gave some comfort to my nights. I was beginning to realize a part of me that may have been in existence before me, fear of darkness. If not for this light, this fear may have gotten the better of such a young life, but instead, this area offered everything my little world could ask for.

Out back in between the houses, was a playground, nice and safe, the only one of its kind that I knew of in South Miami. We had a swing, merry go round, see saw, sliding board and our own home made jumping board that we took advantage of as often as we could. But like all kids, things grow old fast, and there was always something better that you have thought, but time would not allow you to understand fully what you could expect of yourself.

During these days, while everybody else was either in school or working, my sister and I would stay home. I believe to this day, that’s the reason why I feel closer to her than anyone.

After being inside all day, for that matter, all week, because by the time everybody got home, there wasn’t much time left in the day to do anything but prepare for the next day. So, there wasn’t much you could get involved in. This solitude gave time to just think, and it seemed as if that’s all I did. Once everyone was home, it was time to take my bath and it seems that it was off to bed soon after that. So you woke with just about the same thoughts you went to bed with. Not being able to understand any thing, and not asking any questions, I wasn’t getting anywhere, but this it seems didn’t bother me. Knowing what I wanted to know probably would have scared me.

People only told you something, the way it looked anyway, when you were getting into something you shouldn’t,