The Book of Dad Too: More Quotes and Antidotes for a Lifetime of Wisdom

By Dr. Robert A. Benson

A product of perseverance gained through
experience; originally from one of the toughest
areas to grow up in, Northeastern Inner
City, USA. A veteran of the United States
Air Force and a graduate from the school of
Hard Knocks. Robert, a Doctor of Philosophy
(PhD) has seen and experienced many
things as he has literally been all over the
world. His greatest education was garnered
through various life altering and shaping events. His truly most
prized assets are his family, wisdom, intelligence and determination.
Priorities are God, Family (immediate & extended) then
Vocation; all else falls into place from there.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: May 14, 2012
• ISBN: 9781469191621

Dr. Robert A. Benson

Born and raised in Chester, PA August 24, 1960. He remained there and never traveled more than 100 miles away from Chester until he graduated from Chester High School in 1979. Upon graduation he entered the United States Air Force, traveled the world, and acquired education (BS & MPA) until October of 2003, when he retired as a Senior Master Sergeant (E-8). He is married the former Ulett M. Williams of Gary Indiana, he has three children, Erica C Gause, Ulon Marcus and Robert Andrew Benson, and one grandson David Kevin Gause, Jr.

Book preview

Copyright © 2012 by Dr. Robert A. Benson.

Library of Congress Control Number:       2012905721

ISBN:         Hardcover                               978-1-4691-9161-4

                   Softcover                                 978-1-4691-9160-7

                   Ebook                                      978-1-4691-9162-1

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the copyright owner.

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Contents

Forward

Introduction /Preface

What makes a person who they are?   Personal Foundation

6 Hours of Bus Ride Home

Early in the Consciousness

Rejection

Yet More

The Twinkie

Chapters of Quotes and Antidotes

Chapter 1   Attitude

Chapter II   Business Understanding

Chapter III   Good versus Evil

Chapter IV   Marriage/Family/Relationships (MFR)

Chapter V   Wisdom; Plane and Simple

POEMS/Musings & Mental Spit

The Convoluted Mess

Conclusion

Fade

A Brother’s Prayer for a Sinner

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Dr. Robert A. Benson

Forward

This extraordinary read by my good friend, Robert Benson, takes you on an emotional rollercoaster ride as he delves into the depths of complicated relationships during his childhood through adult life experiences. He discusses the anger, sadness, strife, and a myriad of other emotions as he recounts the profound situations that have molded him to become the man he has become today.

The book has been a therapy process for Robert as it allowed him to release pinned up emotions that he had been carrying for many years. He captivates the reader with his colorful language from the first page to the last one. Be prepared to laugh, cry, and ask yourself why he is resilient. Even though the relationships with his loved ones were strained, he shows that it is never too late to strengthen your family bond. Because of his disconsolate experiences, he continues to make a concerted effort to make sure that his relationship with his two sons and daughter is positive and encouraging.

Despite the odds that were against him, Robert has gone from poverty to obtaining a Ph. D. His story helps us to realize that if we are intrinsically motivated and tenacious, success can be achieved. This book is the first of many more to come.

Sasha

Dedication

To all who are close to me, you know who you are (U NO WHO U R)

Pray for You, Me; Mine’s & Yours

Introduction /Preface

I write this book out of and in the middle of what could be a mid to later life crisis. I was also on a self righteous kick that I had to get off of as well. I turned 50 years nearly two years and several months ago and frankly, I have been confused, frustrated, deterred, distracted and hungry ever since. It’s sort of like revisiting Freud’s Id, Ego and Superego all over again, only this time with more attitude. My (who has been dealing with my insecurities, and the other emotions mentioned earlier) wife threw me this big party that I did not ask for and did not want. It brought up some old feelings I haven’t visited with in many years, you know recollection of some embarrassing things and situations. I’m sure she threw it to let me know that she really cares for me and possibly to purge herself for some problems (not unlike any other couple) we have had for over 25 years of marriage. She was frustrated because most of the people she invited and who RSVP(ed) couldn’t or didn’t show, although it was a really nice turnout none the less. Because of where I sit (theoretically), as I write this I am motivated by several feelings.

I am distant from and miss my children; miss my wife, frustrated that I was/am running into obstacles on life, education, employment and the like. My oldest son continues to struggle with and disregard the opportunities put before him, we have to accept who he is and be patient with him; I guess it’s the low pants and that he has defaced his body with tattoos. My daughter who has also decided to deface her body with tattoos all over, she also appears to continue to struggle with the family issues she experienced as a child; her husband has on several occasions behaved in mysterious ways that has placed his trustworthiness in question, even though I think they will be OK, she knows that I will be there for her when she needs me. My youngest son still seems to be finding himself, not sure what he wants to do at this point but exist. My youngest son is truly gifted; he seems to excel exponentially at whatever he does, and then move on to something else. My grandson is truly a joy, when I get to see him. And now, my wife.

My wife, I guess continue to place this woman on such a high pedal stool. We continue to experience the same problems found in the normal marriage and parenting handbook. Actually some of the experiences were fodder and inspiration for many of the quotes I put in my last book. She has and continues to do what is her level (when I say level I mean that she has never been taught how to be a wife or a mother, a follower, a supporter . . .) best on a number of functions as I continue to spend a great deal of time away from the residence for employment. We continue to plug away at this thing we call marriage, take weekend trips when able just to get away. That is not always easy, as we have two young men in the nest that really need our presence; I honestly do not know if I’ll get to where I am going without her; trust her with my life is a must anymore. Well, why purge on this level at this time?

I recently completed a PhD in Public Policy and Administration. Believe it or not I had been in the process for the past year and a half. Interestingly, most of what I have written here was done in between iterations of completing the degree. When I started finalizing this book I wasn’t sure if I was any further then than I was a year ago, none the less I am still working and should be done in the next 3-5 weeks of this writing (fingers crossed), it’s nice to know now that I am really done, no, I mean really done.

I wrote a book about 2 years ago that listed 200 quotes on what was on my mind and my attempts to communicate with my children (my wife didn’t feel she needed any additional guidance from me) while working away from them. I honestly did this out of love and guilt for being away. And, the continued struggle to converse with them regularly, as they exhibited symptoms of ignorance a father often times is likely to think of as and call a disease. One of the quotes in that book was Sometimes the need to complete one thing motivated you to perform something else, never mistake this for distractions. Unfortunately/fortunately I did just that, I was supposed to be working on my PhD, and managed to do several other things as well; for example(s):

-   I wrote the book: The Book of Dad; Quotes for a Lifetime of Wisdom

-   Did an online/internet radio show (my wife as co-host, we included our kids in some of the episodes as well)

-   Started an LLC for managing property

-   Bought and renovated a rental property

-   Served as a visiting professor of a university (developed/taught courses)

-   Traveled the country for performances and auditions for my youngest son

-   Bought a Condo for residence at my primary place of employment

While in the midst of juggling all of these in addition to completing the degree, I exhaustively kept my family on a pedal stool, including them, campaigning them, giving (paying large sums of money) them opportunity after opportunity, and for the most part, I did not get what I was looking for in return. For the most part they didn’t take things as seriously as I had hoped. What I did get from them at times were bad attitudes, since of entitlement, no return of favor, and barely any love . . . Withstanding all of that, this book unlike the first one, isn’t about them, it’s not about professing my love to them, pushing them, motivating them. I am sure that they know now that I do and can (love and want them to succeed), almost to a point of taking it/me for granted.

Hopefully this doesn’t come off unintended as I am not angry, they are only human