If You Tell...I'll Kill You!

By Tonya McLin and Tonya M. McLin

Something sinister has crawled into the heart of the man that should be a father, a guide, a leader and the first nurturer to future relationships, but yet turns a childs worst nightmare into reality. This true life drama brings home the significance of protecting your children. Being able to recognize the subliminal clues relating to molestation, abuse, predatory relationships and even deception of close alliances. Read it and be aware, very aware of whos watching your child!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: Dec 15, 2004
• ISBN: 9781465331786

Tonya McLin

Tonya resides 30 miles outside of the bustling city of Atlanta in Norcross, Georgia. The mother of two childre, a son and daughter, Tonya loves the notoreity of being a native Atlanta resident of the famous sothuern Mecca. Born december 24, 1964, Mrs. McLin emerged as the sixth of eight children born to write her story. Rising as a Phoenix, Tonya is a successful entrepreneur/owner of Towns Place Hair Salon, also located in Norcross. Her true-life story will have you on your feet applauding its honesty and critical awareness of domestic violence, where you'd least expect it.

Book preview

If You Tell . . .

I’ll Kill You!

T. M. McLin

Copyright © 2004 by T. M. McLin.

Cover Design by Solex Enterprises

CLF Enterprises, Inc.

Suwanee, Georgia

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or

transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical,

including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage

and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the

copyright owner.

This book was printed in the United States of America.

First Edition

Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, Women’s

Devotional Bible, and New International Version. Copyright

©1990 by The Zondervan Corporation. Used according to

Publishing permissions used in website www. zondervan.com

If you tell . . . I will kill you! : 1. Child Abuse 2. Biography

Bibliography: Literary Credit for Research from Hopper, Jim,

Ph.D.; Dr. Hopper is a researcher ant therapist with a doctorate in

clinical psychology with an Internet site containing information that

has been placed in this book

To order additional copies of this book, contact:

Xlibris Corporation

1-888-795-4274

www.Xlibris.com

[e-mail]

23258

Contents

Acknowledgements

THE TRIBUTE

Preface

LIFE 101

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

LIFE 102

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

THE END

Chapter 6

LIFE 103

Chapter 7

THE BEGINNING

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Questions and Answers

Appendix

Resources

About The Author

If You Tell . . .

I’ll Kill You!

Acknowledgements

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Celebrating the completion of this book, I must acknowledge those who have helped me along the way. First and foremost, I give thanks to my Heavenly Father, who breathes life and creativity into my being. To Bishop Eddie L. Long, whose ministry has shed light into my dark places. Thank you for being so transparent in your ministry and helping me to complete the puzzle. To my parents, Timothy and Barbara Towns, whose love created me. To my grandparents, Vivian and Zeidi Holland, whose support and encouragement sustained me during my childhood. Thank you for the lifelong lessons and unwavering love that nourished my dreams and for having compassionate and loving hearts. To my husband, thank you for being a pillar of strength when necessary and a source of comfort always. To my children, you are my inspiration. To my siblings, through it all, we are still standing. To my numerous family and friends, thank you for standing in the gap of prayer. To my writer, who had to take my spirit. To all the parents reading this book, appreciate the title that you hold. Last but not least, I hope every reader of this book, will find peace and strength, and that your spirits will soar.

Thank you God; for supplying a willing spirit to help me write my story in the person of Cynthia Ford. In order to write my story, she became me. To be able to feel as passionate as I did about opening my life, I had to first open my life to her. This caused her to walk where she had never been. This new world was a place where we were both humbled by the experience. Your love was there during the time we had to step back from the project and let You give it to us, and we thank you. Even though some of the places were deep, we had to pull up all that was rooted and not leave one stone unturned, despite the late nights, no money and timelines. Mrs. Ford did not know how big this was until she faced the challenge. She took the words and turned them upside down. My words looked as if they had been put under a microscope. She blew me up. Lord, fill her back up with your loving grace, that only You can do.

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THE TRIBUTE

In Tribute to Barbara Jean Towns

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Barbara means a stranger

Nevertheless, Mom, the foundation of God standeth firm . . . The Lord knew what to do for me; I am his daughter. You were a stranger in a lifestyle you did not design. The protection and care you wanted for your children was in your heart and in your soul. Even as the Lord gives a mother, He may allow one to be taken away, yet, in your case he left your sweet smile and spirit to rest within your children. Barbara, God has answered your prayer and He answered . . . SUDDENLY! As you enter sweet rest, know that you are threaded through each chapter and page of this book.

Paraphrased based on II Timothy 2:19 (NIV)

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This page was created to accommodate us (the children) with a traditional gravesite in which to visit our mother. Continue to pray our strength in the Lord as we have indeed come this far by faith and trust in our Lord and Savior Christ Jesus.

If anyone acknowledges that Jesus

is the Son of God, God lives

in him and he in God.

—I John 4:15

Sometimes we quote a scripture people have not had revealed to them, so I shall interpret its meaning, paraphrased below, as it was revealed to me.

Through my revelation many have been saved

just by me telling my story.

If anyone acknowledges that Tonya is the daughter of Barbara, Barbara lives in me and Tonya in Barbara.

This is to say even though I have never seen my Mom to remember her vividly, yet I have her spirit, her essence and her smile. That’s why I know there is a God because we haven’t seen our Redeemer either. Yet we are all

members in the Body of Christ, meant to carry

the Spirit of God within us.

Preface

It was difficult to tell my story and reveal so much intimacy of my life. However, the decision to write this book was already predestined by the Lord. Even the travesty of horror I experienced was used by the Lord. Even my body served as a vessel of His desire to bless families. My life has been used for this purpose—to tell my story. Scripture says—

Commit to the Lord, whatever you do, and your plans will succeed.

—Proverbs 16:3 (NIV)

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Ton, Ton—Are you okay? the answer coming from me slowly—I’m alright.

Recalling the question in my childhood when I ran into a porcelain sink at Nana’s. Remembering how my brother and I would play for hours, running and jumping around the house. There are so many memories, so many memories. Not all of the memories are pleasant, but there is a purpose for everything and my story was meant to minister to families across the world. I realized that there was testimony in my spirit that had to be spoken.

The purpose of this book is to minister to hurting families and to share a testimony that only can come from the heart of children who lived through the most devastating experiences that could ever be imagined. However, it’s something about the going through that the ministry evolves.

Psalms 23 is a common scripture that Christians recite in praise and worship, but I now know a new dimension of this psalm. Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil, for Thou art with me means something entirely different when you have experienced real fear! I learned that God takes care of children and nurtures places where man will never reach with a mortal word or deed. While we carry attributes of divinity, we are not there yet; we are still capable of hurting each other. We as humans’ vacillate between flesh and spirit. God wants us to be all spirit. You will understand as the true story of my life unfold the difference between flesh and spirit, moral and immoral", holy and unholy . . . it will all be written here for the understanding.

God has come to get the record straight and establish a Kingdom without spot or wrinkle. No more hurt, no more hideous pain, no more abuse, no more sadness. God’s Kingdom is now being established as book ministries such as this are divinely created to heal a hurting world. Every sin shall be accounted for and the corrected balance sheet will reign forevermore when God establishes the new heaven and new earth.

Enter your reading prayerfully and with your spirit open to revelation. This is not a casual read, this book is very graphic, yet it will impart evidence and potential paths of abuse. Reading these pages should help to minimize the pain that some are still feeling. This book is for everyone. Strategy of the enemy is not to make his self known, but to intertwine his spirit into our lives and the lives of our loved ones. The subtle approach the enemy uses on a daily basis arrives oftentimes unnoticed. The gift of discernment is given to all humans, but rarely used. Knowing this, satan attacks the tools we do not use. This book will sufficiently arm you with enough information to spiritually fight the enemy and scriptures that will add to the artillery God has already supplied—TRUTH.

Blessings,

Tonya

LIFE 101

Chapter 1

The Crime of a Lifetime

"Where, Oh Death is your victory?

Where, Oh Death is your sting?

—I Corinthians 15:55

The headlines lay across the living room sofa, mentioning transitions that had taken place in the civil rights movement since the death of Martin Luther King Jr. on April 4, 1968. Commentaries from the mayor threaded articles throughout the local morning edition. There was so much news it became nearly unbearable to read the paper. Even the ads from Davison’s (now Rich’s-Macy) were unappealing as a young 26 year-old mother of eight went about her daily chores. The routine was not the same, and thoughts had changed. There had been a reeling discovery leading to the way she viewed her husband, her marriage, her family and their relationship.

Barbara had just laid the toddlers down for their afternoon nap. Gazing out of her bedroom window she thought about her past week and wondered how so many calamites could have happened in her life at one time. Reminiscing about the good times gave her a small bit of comfort, especially the good times with her children. Dancing in the floor with the older girls, allowing them to stand on her feet to keep time to the music was her favorite pastime. Listening to her oldies but goodies music and hearing favorite singers’ belt out melodious tunes of the sixties was another bright spot. Yes, even remembering the day that she and Tim met. Yet the good times for her and Tim were long gone. After her latest confrontation with Tim, she was sure of it. Barbara knew what she had to do, but time seemed to drag with the answers. The only thing she could focus on now was protecting her children and looking for a new place to live and start all over.

Tim had been very difficult to talk to after the separation. He was even more agitated after discovering that she was pregnant with their ninth child. The irritability of carrying the child in such tumultuous times did not help. The two older girls were edgy and distant. One of the girls never wanted to leave her side; she never wanted her mother to be alone. The boys just seemed to become more active and wanting to stay out of the house. The greatest comfort seems to be her helpful middle child and