All That I Am with Thoughts and Dreams

By Tanya Lynn Walker

In understanding who I am and the journey it took to get me from one point in my life to another, I have written this book of poetry as the link to a creative process of true and honest emotions.

I am the force behind my own energy and fate. Through purpose and passion it is with joy and happiness I share my unshakeable truths. My world revolves around interpretations of rhythm and rhyme. While some may view these poems as thought-provoking, they are merely words of beauty and power that surround me in my space and time. The passion and light reflected in this book are responses to inspirations, tragedies, love, and faith, a way that helps me to connect with the modern reader. They are words that I have spoken and thought of in my mind and heart.
Poetry is love in any language and because I am in love with life, I have written these love songs to those that have achieved something greater than the power of words. Poetry is wisdom and the humility that comes from wisdom. All the knowledge that I have gained from wisdom comes from heaven. I am but a lonely dreamer.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Xlibris US
• Release date: May 21, 2010
• ISBN: 9781450084963

Tanya Lynn Walker

Tanya Lynn Walker is an aspiring writer and poet. In “All That I Am With Thoughts and Dreams,” are poems she has written expressing her truths, loves, hopes, fears, and desires. Although Tanya has been writing for over twenty years, this is her first self-published book of poetry. She is currently working on an autobiographical novel entitled, “1001 Independence Street” coming later in 2010 and a children’s book entitled, “Big Sister, Little Sister and a Brother In Between.” During her spare time, Tanya enjoys traveling to different geographical locations discovering new people, their cultures and histories. Tanya has three children, Natasha, Marcus, and Candice. She is originally from Brenham, Texas but now resides in Dallas, Texas.

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Contents

Introduction

CHAPTER 1

Belonging—A Celebration of Family and Love

A Family Reunion

A Lullaby From My Father

Bluebonnets And Blue Bell

Brothers And Sisters

Dark Chocolate

Dawn, Daylight, And Dirty Dishes

Dewberry Dance

Dinner Is Served

Genesis

In A Prayerful House

Remembering My Mother . . . Her Legacy, My Season

Sister

Victoria’s Birthday

We Need A Washing Machine

CHAPTER 2

Rejoicing Wisdom—A Mother’s True Test of Love

A Dog-Gone Tale

A Truehearted Trucker

Chip-A-Poo

Cupcake Cutie

Don’t Miss Your Light

Dynamic Diva

Greetings To Grandma

Money Marketer

Picture Perfect

Ramblin’ Rigger

Shop Til We Drop

Sisters

Sweet Jesus

Sweet Songs Of My Heart

When They Call Me Mama

Wild Child

Wonder If They Noticed

You Color Me Happy

You Color Me Joyful

You Color Me Sunshine

CHAPTER 3

Standing Firm in Faith—Allowing Myself to Laugh

Best Things In Life Aren’t Free

Breath of Fresh Air

College Rules

Computer Blues

Dear God . . . This Is My Loving Prayer

Don’t Panic

Economizing The Economy

Good Morning Sunshine

Grocery Shopping 101

Image Power

Me

Medicate, Meditate

My Bikini Dilemma

My Own Best Friend

Pound Cake Passion

Simplicity

Single Mom

Sixty, Soulful, And Smooth

Springtime Spunk

Sunday’s Guide

Sweet Recourses

Truth Is . . .

Weekend Getaway

CHAPTER 4

God Inspired—Surrendering Through Storms and Second Chances

A Day Without Jesus

Because You Say You Love Jesus

Christians Made Easy

Closed Captioned For The Jesus Impaired

Don’t Think Twice About Jesus

Fruits Of His Vineyard

Functional And Fulfilled

God Bless Our House

God’s Healing In The Midst Of Tragedies And PainGuaranteed Care

House Call

I’m Useless Without Him

I Don’t Need The Flavor

I Know I’ve Been Saved

Indulgent Grace

Infinitely Better

In God We Trust

Invisible Boost

It’s So Simple

I Want To Place An Order

Jesus Christ

Living Fearful And Faithful

Never Complain

No Stamp Needed

Pure And Simple

Satisfaction Guaranteed

Say Yes To Jesus

Seeking God’s Word And Truth

Testing One, Two, Three

Thoughts Of Happiness

What A Privilege It Is To Know You

CHAPTER 5

Love Straight From the Heart—Discovering My Truth

A Fearful Heart

A Moment With You

A New Beginning

Addiction

Afraid To Love You

All That And More

Are You Happy?

Aware Of Your Heart

Before You Say You Love Me

Better You With Me

Caught Up In Morning Love

Choosing To Love You

Dive Into My World

Empowering Dreams

Even Though . . .

Everything That Matters

Finally Happening

For Us

Getting Over Getting Even

Giving In To Love

Halfway Through

Hidden Love Song

I Am But A Dreamer

If Only . . .

In Dew Time

In Your Life

Is It True?

I Trusted My Heart To You

Maybe That’s Because

Midnight Fling

Mind Song

Moments Of Happiness

Morning Slippers

My Indispensable You

My Need For You

My Promised Promise

No More Guessing

No One Else

No Turning Back

Promises

Psychological Pleasures

Rekindling Old Feelings

Romantic Prelude

Sideswiped

Silence

Smooth Answer

Stage Exit

Starlite Sweethearts

Sunsets And Champagne

Thirty Seven Minutes

What’s Your Story?

What Makes You Beautiful

What Would Make You Happy?

Without Question

You

You Might As Well

You Weren’t Who You Say You Were

CHAPTER 6

Holiday Extravaganzas

An Easter Story—The Resurrection Of Christ

Celebrating Christ At Christmas

Chasing Winter

Christmas Spirit All Around The World

Father’s Day

Good Cheer For A New Year

Grandparent’s Day

Hamburgers, Frankfurters, And The Fourth Of July

Juneteenth—African Americans’ Celebration Of Freedom

President’s Day—An American Revolution—Commanders-In-Chief Roses And Kisses For Valentine’s Day

Thanksgiving, Blessings, And Apple Tarts

The Gentleness Of God . . . A Moment With My Mother In Honor of Mother’s Day

The Martin Luther King, Jr. Movement—Social Change And Civil Rights

CHAPTER 7

Illumination—An Exploration of Imaginations and Dreams

A Sea Journey

Bed And Breakfast

Brenham, Texas—Home Of Blue Bell Ice Cream

Hot Springs, Arkansas—Healing Waters

Island Waters

Memphis, Blues, And Barbecue

New York City—Birthplace Of A Renaissance

Savannah, Georgia—Hostess City Of The South

CHAPTER 8

America’s Freedom—A Cornerstone of Justice

A Rainbow Of Colors

America—Big Solutions For Resolutions

American Soldiers

Returning Home

CHAPTER 9

Classmates and Friends—Coming Together

40th Class Reunion In Honor of the Graduate Class

Pickard High School—1967 June 16, 2007

Pickard High School—Friends Forever

Yearbook

Young At Heart—Life In The Sixties

CHAPTER 10

Women Witnessing and Winning Souls in Christ

Sisterhood In Christ

Testimonial Tea

Welcome Address at Testimonial Tea Breakfast—2008

What Would Women Do

Women In Christ 2008 Annual Day Evening Program Address

Acknowledgements

I would like to thank the Xlibris Corporation for their professional services in the direction, assistance, and guidance during the production of this poetry book. The publication could not have been possible but for the efforts put in by a team of professional individuals at the Xlibris Corporation. Thanks to Moses Stanford, Publishing Consultant; Marianne Amador, Submissions Representative; and Jasmine Hedocil, Author Service Representative. Thank you all for your hard work and diligence.

I also wish to thank Natasha Wells for her work as my Author’s photographer and her undying devotion and dedication in seeing this project through the end with me. The time, love, and energy you gave were invaluable for this project. Thank you also to Candice Wells for all the great and wonderful contributions that helped me to push forward with this book. Your suggestions and mentoring was paramount to the spirit of this book.

Dedication

This book of poems I graciously dedicate to my children. To Natasha, Marcus, and Candice—I honor you and love you with all my heart. It is with this book I wish laughter and joy into your hearts. Your undying love for me has inspired a truth that will light up my world forever. My love for you goes far beyond human love; and because of that you are all a spiritual light to my soul. You are my best days for the rest of my days.

The child is God’s gift to the family. Each child is created in the special image and likeness of God for greater things; to love and to be loved.

Mother Theresa

A mother’s love liberates.

Maya Angelou

To my sister Kay Frances Walker-Sillemon, I thank you for so much laughter and fun. Even though you are not here with me where we can share this book together, I know that you are watching from heaven. I shall always remember your testimony of strength and perseverance through all your suffering and pain. You taught me to listen to God’s voice in good health and bad health, and to not give up on Him when all others fail. He is sufficient and sovereign. For the years God left you here with me, I was honored and proud to be your baby sister.

If tears could build a stairway and memories a lane, I’d walk right to Heaven and bring you home again.

Unknown

Mark the perfect man and behold the upright; for the end of that man is peace.

Psalms 37:37

Introduction

There is ultimate beauty in believing in your dreams; some I never thought would come true. But in the end something miraculous happened. Did I think a miracle would happen for me? You bet I did! I believe dreams are gifts from God and they are his way of showing me the essence and power of his love. Every word in life has purpose and my purpose in life is to have faith, harmony, and peace through God’s word and prayer. God’s salvation has empowered me to love and live through the power of his grace; and only by the power of prayer will I achieve greatness. I know that my life has had some twists and turns and there’s certainly nothing I can change. I am who I am—a dreamer.

The choices I made in my life were determined by my own energy. I have chosen to live in God’s presence and comfort, a provision and purpose he has provided for me to be a better person in this life. My goal in writing this book and sharing my collections of poems was to bring life to all the memories I had with my family and friends. It was my way to inflict laughter, provide enjoyment and lightheartedness. It is, too, poems that I share in the fullness of loving another human being and the hardships of staying in love. They are poems of my healing grace; reflecting on those times sitting with my mother and father again, and feeling the happiness and peace we shared so many times in my life. Reflecting back to how I grew up in that small, three-bedroom house empowered my heart to be free again. That connection with my family was my connection to God. In that house I learned to love, to be loved, and celebrate human kindness. Life was simple, easy, and uncomplicated. I have made special memories—those that will forever keep my dreams alive.

It would be without forethought that I thank God for His loving kindness and mercy in renewing my mind to write this book. I thank Him for obedience, wisdom, strength, faithfulness, and guidance in standing firm in my convictions to know that He is the God of miracles and second chances. It would be impossible for me to share this collection of poems with my readers if it had not been for the courage and dignity my parents so graciously instilled in me to be who I am today. We were a family that laughed, prayed, and loved together. These poems and stories are about special times that drew me closer to the people I love. They are my soul inspirations, a reconnection with my mother and father. From all the journals, diaries, poems and stories, my children will know the joy I had growing up in my father’s prayerful house.

To my father and mother, Rev. Victor Walker, Sr. and Mrs. Frances Walker, thank you so much for all that you gave to me—love, patience, kindness, devotion, and prayer. You are the epitome of what real parents should be and why children shouldn’t ever complain. God made me in his image and defined me with character and grace. Motherhood, fatherhood, love, honesty, and trust are the greatest rewards any parent could give a child. You filled my life with so much love and for that I am very appreciative and grateful. I pray that I have inherited enough of that love and sacrifice to consume the hearts and souls of my children. Daddy I know that you are having a wonderful time preaching to all of God’s angels and saints. Mama I can only imagine how you are infusing heaven with the wonderful smell of your sweet potato and apple pies.

To my children, Natasha, Marcus, and Candice—I can only give you what God has given me, a lifetime of love. You are the air I breathe and the space I move in. I could never have made it without you. I thank God everyday for His generosity in the three beautiful gifts He gave to me. I am mesmerized by your charms, your spirits, and your zests for life. When I look at you I see greatness. Time has passed by so fast! You are adults and making adult decisions. I pray that God will continue to instill in you the wisdom to make the right decisions in your lives where the three of you will always give him honor, glory, and praise. I wanted to shield you from the harshness and pains of the world but I knew I couldn’t. Only God can protect you and keep you strong. I am so happy that God made me your mother. I love you all. Thanks for taking me on some amazing journeys!!!

To all my sisters and brothers, I humbly say thank you for your support. I shall always cherish the endless telephone conversations we had together during this process. Thank you for the good times we had growing up together and for all of your advice. Your love and kindness will never be forgotten. It is always great to hear stories about mom and dad and all the fun we had together. Some of those stories I had forgotten but I thank you for allowing me to remember and for sharing them with me. I thank all that invited me and my family into your homes and the hospitality you have shown. To my daughter-in-law Tanya and my beautiful grandchildren, Jalynn, Jordin, Joi, and Marcus Jr.,—thank you for the times we have spent together. It is certainly wonderful to have you in my life. Thank you to my extended family, friends and church family at These Are They Community Church for your love and prayers. It is here God led me to seek, serve, and surrender.

During my lifetime here on this planet I have been acquainted with some remarkable friends, friends who I have trusted with my deepest secrets, friends that have gone out of their way to make my time on earth pleasant. My true friends I have known for the past forty plus years are friends who know me but love me anyway, friends who have seen my faults and flaws but like me the way I am, and friends who have shared my pain and joy, always faithful and forever loving. You have made my life so rich with your laughter and your smiles and I thank you.

While the greater part of these stories and poems are true, some have been embellished as my creative way to enhance the power of your imagination and laughter. It was to provide readers a cathartic and curious sense of what could have made that time in my life so profound. At the concept of writing this book I learned a valuable lesson of control. I spent quite a bit of time trying to write with honesty and integrity. I somehow got caught up in those beautiful memories of my childhood. I knew from experience that God controls all. He had mapped out a plan for me long before I expected. He orchestrated the writing of this book and has commissioned good things to happen because of it.

In giving up control we must realize that God’s purpose is better than our purpose, His plans are better than our plans and His perch are higher than ours. Let him turn to the Lord and he will have mercy on him, and to God, for he will freely pardon. For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways, declares the Lord.

Isaiah 55:7-9

CHAPTER 1

"Belonging—A Celebration

of Family and Love"

There are so many definitions of what comprises or makes up a family. Families can have two or more people connected together who share goals and values, or have long term commitments to one another. A family can also be a fundamental group in a society typically consisting of one or two parents and their children that may reside in the same dwelling place. Whatever the nucleus of a family may be, it is important that love intercedes when all else fails. Characteristic traits are inherited and identified through the systems of families.

My family was a family that was spiritually connected. We cared for and loved one another and nurtured the relationships of all the people around us. By simply loving one another we experienced a belonging, an attachment that led us down a path of truth and faith. Applications of prayer, encouragement, obedience, and devotion were illustrations from a mother and father who found strength in God’s power. I am so thankful and grateful that it is from them that I chose to love and worship God in that same way. One of the most important commandments I learned growing up with my family was to love everyone as I would want God to love me. In practicing and perfecting the simple strategies of love, I discovered that I belonged to a family that sustained fear and darkness, death and weariness, and healing and hope with God’s armor of protection.

Because I was faithfully fulfilled as a young child, I developed a strong emotional bond with my sisters and brothers. We learned lessons of leadership, friendship, and unconditional love. I knew then that God’s love for me was more gracious when he humbled