Breathe

By Renae Floyd

A book of collective poems that have been inspired by different experiences in relationships. It contains themes that fall in the categories of being healed, wanting love, being in love, hurt by love, you know better than that, insecurities, inspirational, strong enough to walk away from pain, and freaky encounters. These poems can be used to awaken emotions that you have yet to experience, that have been buried deep down inside, OR, that you are scared to release. This is your time to allow yourself to experience life through poetry.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Aug 21, 2021
• ISBN: 9781098386665

Book preview

cover.jpg

Dedication

This book is dedicated to my Twin, Freda Ann. Not from the same mother, but definitely from the same Creator. Through tears and fears. Triumphs and setbacks. From 12am-12pm talks, texts and emails. You gave me all of you and here is the finished product. Finally…… I can Breathe. Thank you.

Breathe © 2021 Renae Floyd

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

ISBN (Print): 978-1-09838-665-8

ISBN (eBook): 978-1-09838-666-5

Contents

HEALING for MY SOUL

touched

THANKS TO THE MOST HIGH! NOW I CAN….BREATHE

I REALLY WANT LOVE

THE WAIT

Different Places

I’m Waiting

Ghost

Let me Know

Confused

SMH

Checkmate

Mind Game

Just Want to be With You

Maybe

I Want to Be

Here I Am

Scared

Thought in my Mind

On Another Level

Chance

Only You and Me

Holding Back

Finally

Can’t get you off my Mind

Calm

Not Meant for Me

Magical

Charged

IN LOVE

In Your Presence

Mushy

Volcano

I can take It

The Journey

Never a Stranger

Your Bed

Not Giving Up on Love

I Love Him

It Shows

A Place that is Formular

Feelings

The Thought

You Made It

You

How Much I Miss You

We’re in this Thang Together

A Lazy Day

The Sweetest Thing I Ever Known

What You Do?

Missed Opportunity

Dang

You’re Back

It’s Hard

It Kills Me

Ingredients for Love

You/Me

That Booty

Just Want To Be With You

A Spell

When We’re Apart

Loving You is No Mystery

He’s Mine

HURT BY LOVE

Playing the Fool

Hurt By Love

You Don’t Want Me

Crazy in Love

The Man I Thought Was Mine

Mad

Threw with Love

I Had a Boyfriend

Who am I?

Something Just Ain’t Right

I Still Desire You

No Game

Not Enough

He Doesn’t See Me

Here, Not There

Not Again

I Can’t Deny It

I’m Not

Not Over Him

I Knew the Truth

BrokenHearted

It’s Over

I Needed to Leave You

Disappointed

Silence

Misunderstood

Where Am I ?

Another Empty Promise

Sad

Cheating Men

If He Breaks Up with Me

I Knew

Liar

GOTTA HEAL ME. YOU KNOW BETTER

Bipolar

Have You Ever?

I Should Know

I’m Strong

Too Tired

No Need for a Title

INSECURITY

A WHOLE MESS

Release It

Keeping You a Fantasy

INSPIRATIONAL

Stronger Now

Coming Back

I Am or I Am

Breathe Baby Girl

Waiting

You Can’t Stop My Destiny

Beautiful

Today

I Need to Run

Why Is This Line So Long?

What Do You Want?

I Need Love

Maybe

STRONGER TO LEAVE

Bye Baby

The Release

Blocked You

Should I ?

The Alarm Went Off

Ready To Give Up

Hear My Prayer

I’m Threw

Moving On

Empty Me Out

It’s Not You I Need

Closing The Door

I’m Releasing You

XXX FREAKY XXX

How To Please a Man

I Want To

Now

Nose Wide Open

Take It

Quit You

I Should Have

The Way You Do Me

I Just Can’t Wait

If You Came Over Right Now

Give It To Me Baby

Not Your Average Quickie

Pleasure Me

Morning

Goodnight

I Want It

Not Waiting On You

I Need To….

I Want

It’s Been A Long Time

Freeze

Introduction

This project has been in the making since I was a young girl learning how to write. Drawing those connecting cursive e’s pretending they were rhymes that expressed my emotions. As I grew up, so did my expressions. So did my emotions. And so did my experiences. I lived and life that was filled with different things that I wanted to release. Good things and not so good things. It has evolved and expanded to the words that you will soon read to reflect different phases of life and love. As a romantic, I have experienced so much. From being so in love, to uncontrollable tears, to wanting to just crawl up in a ball, in my bed, and allow the television to take me away from the pain I could barely explain. I also grew into a woman who experienced love that hit the spot at times and missed the need at others. I went on a word journey that allowed myself to know what real sexual desire and pleasure felt like once it is allowed to explode into pure pleasure. Now I get the chance to release it. Not just for me for you too. Release all that has been experienced by us. All that has been hidden in our souls. All that we couldn’t say, I pray, that I have said it in the words on the following pages. As you read this, I pray you gain peace in love, peace in hurt, peace in finding yourself, peace in being a freak, or peace in a storm to find the love you seek, so that one day you too can…….Breathe!

HEALING for MY SOUL

touched

Touched in the wrong place as a little girl

Just to think about it makes me want to hurl

Why did they do that to me?

It changed my entire destiny

I was supposed to be a powerful woman full of life

Now I walk around and I attract strife

I was supposed to be a superstar

Now I walk around with this inner scar

Why did they do this to me?

Didn’t they realize all that I was supposed to be?

My mouth was supposed to speak life

Now the actions I take won’t allow me to be somebody’s wife

Who wants a messed-up woman who still has the mind of a girl?

Who wants a woman who still needs to convert back into a fantasy world?

Is there anybody who understands me?

Is there anybody who will allow me to heal and create a new memory?

Will the love that I need so badly to cover my brokenness and hold me through triggers,

Will that love ever be delivered?

I wish I could just be in a place of pure rest

A place where I can just be held against my lover chest

A place that is safe and has security

A place that allows me to see my new reality

It is ok I don’t need to suffer no more

God has opened up a brand-new door

I’m healed and I’m ready to explore

I wonder what all He has, what’s in store

I am free to love and be accepted

Sometimes I get nervous to be rejected

I am happy inside and out

Sometimes I’m so scared I need to shout

I bring the love I have to give to me and it stays

I just pray that the pain can just go away

I want to be all that I am supposed to be

Damn, I just wish nobody ever touched me.

THANKS TO THE MOST HIGH! NOW I CAN….BREATHE

One day the sky was clear

My mind was open, my heart was tender

I moved from being so needy to a selective lender

Standing strong and moving forward to the direction of my destiny

Not because I’m without flaws but because you called me

Breathing in and out my breath calmer now

Taking it one step after the other

This is how it feels to walk on solid ground

Taking a moment to look at my reflection

Gives me the energy I need to bond under spiritual connection

Tears fall from my eyes, not out of agony

But I’m able to recognize the scales that just fell from me

Breathe, step, stop, think.

Breathe, step, stop, blink.

I won’t stop loving and being open to it

I know the more I heal, I’ll learn how to do it

I just need to take my time

Examine the facts, will the end results be mine?

If the flags fly high in my face

The strength of God’s voice will help me regulate

My future is clear, bright and open to me

As long as I don’t forget to Breathe

I REALLY WANT LOVE

THE WAIT

I hate crying all the time

Feeling down and out and lonely yet having to pretend everything is fine

They say tell God your wants and desires

He’ll send them to you quicker than the spread of a forest fire

I’ve done that and I haven’t received

It’s getting harder for me to sit back and believe

But then I see my prayers come true in other people’s lives

That gives me hope that maybe my negative thoughts are all lies

The waiting part has placed holes in my chest

The place that use to be full of love and tenderness

I’m trying to understand what I’ve done wrong

To make me have to wait so long

I know I’m not perfect and I’ve made a lot of mistakes

But did all that I’ve done contribute to this current fate?

Stay optimistic, be encouraged, don’t give up they keep telling me

As they walk away with their husband and little baby

It’s coming you just wait and see they say to me

As they get off the phone to get their quality time and needed intimacy

Prayer, fasting, writing down what I want doesn’t work for me

I’ve done all 3, this feeling won’t let me be

I want to be done and content with my current state

But something inside of me keeps encouraging me to wait

My heart says true love will