Catharsis of an Unstable Mind: Writings of a Bi-Polar, Recovering Alcoholic Addict

By Lori Keeth

Catharsis of an Unstable Mind is a book that contains my writings from about the 5th grade (when my parents divorced) to about 2003. I wrote when I was manic or when I was depressed and even when I was drunk.
It's like I couldn't sleep unless I got all those thoughts out of my head and then I could lay my head down and sleep. I had kept my writings in a file all these years and when I had my nervous breakdown, my medications weren't working like they used to and I felt manic and pulled all the writings out to look over. It was then I started to work on compiling my poems for publishing. I feel like the title explains how I feel. Putting this book together has helped me work through some issues and it gave me focus in such a confusing time. I hope that maybe it will touch someone and they will seek help if they need it, for whatever reason (drugs, alcohol or mental health). And know this, you are not alone!

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Feb 17, 2014
• ISBN: 9781491857151

Lori Keeth

As a child, my parents divorced and I grew up with my mother, brother and sister. It was then that the sadness and anxiety came. I eventually using alcohol and drugs to deal with my emotions. I started writing poems just to get a sense of relief and continued writing until my young adulthood when I was diagnosed bi-polar disorder and anxiety and started me on medications. Once on the medications, I found that I was not able to write poems anymore. I was able to function and go to college and I have an Associates Degree in Nursing. I had kept it together for 20 years and then I had a nervous breakdown and now I find writing, remembering and everyday things are difficult but I keep trying. I refuse to give up. I am 45 and find that I am having to start my life over again but I have a good family and I am blessed.

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© 2014 Lori Keeth. All rights reserved.

Photo of author courtesy of Clay Stewart

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 02/12/2014

ISBN: 978-1-4918-5716-8 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4918-5715-1 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2014901810

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

Table of Contents

Succinct

Kindness

You

Am I?

Ciao!

We

Once Again

Affirmations

Gratitude

My Own Angel

Whose Skin am I in Today?

Reflections

Oh, how I adore the Night

I’m getting off this Train

Invalidations

I’m wearing the Wrong Negligee

Will I Always Be Afraid?

Just Breathe

Reflections of Me

Demons

PONY GIRL FOR MY MASTER

Afflictions

Who Knew?

The Company of Another

It’s Always the Same Thing

Is it the Truth?

Indescribable Separation

True Friends

Afflicted

Empty Vessel

Recreational Substances

But I Can’t See the Truth

Acceptance

The Awakening

Chianti

Thoughts of What’s to Come

And it’s Coming Hard!

Catharsis

Mulling it over

It’s Expensive Calling from the Other Side

There Are Only Little Things.

I am a Watercolor—No More

I scream so loud and yet No one Hears

My Prayer

Foreword

My name is Lori Michelle and I am many things. I am a daughter, a sister, a mother, and now I am a grandma. In addition to those wonderful blessings, I am also a recovering alcoholic and drug addict. Did I forget to mention that I am bi-polar with extreme anxiety issues? I have been writing since I was in about the fourth or fifth grade before I was put on medication to help with the highs and lows of my disorder. Once on medication I feel, to excuse the term, dumbed down and my creativity doesn’t come like it did before. I struggle for each word and now find using a computer to write more time saving than erasing multiple times.

I have kept these writings over the years and would take them out and remember where I was at that particular moment in my life and could even relive the events. It’s not always a good thing as you will read through some of the writings. Some of the writing