Reason Not to Fall

By Masego Kwenamore

Reason not to fall is a memoir of the Author about overcoming her life challenges. She wrote it so that others may be blessed, be encouraged not to give up, to not throw their confidence away after life tests, and be inspired to get up, walk, run, and soar to the best version of who they were created to be.

Each day affords us the opportunity to live our best life and she chose not to think about what was behind her, and focus only on what was in front of her.
She chose not to focus on what's wrong, where she could've, should've, or would've. Instead, she was grateful that she had another day to embrace.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Masego Kwenamore
• Release date: Oct 11, 2020
• ISBN: 9780620901161

Masego Kwenamore

Masego Kwenamore is an Inspiration speaker, Mentor and Business Consultant.Being bold in her truth has earned Masego a reputation amongst her peers as a resilient, integrity-powered professional and an example of strength and courage.She has been featured on numerous platforms for her wealth of knowledge and life experiences including Singlehood, Divorce, Single parenthood, Gambling and more.When Masego made the choice to share her story as a speaker to help others out of their own darkness, people were drawn to her insights into self understanding and humanity and Masego realised that her mission was clear. Masego began to be the change she wanted to see.The power in Masego’s message helps others shed the guilt and shame that people struggling with addictions and other life struggles face. Part of the biggest hurdle in being able to recover from your situation is first letting go of the shadows in your life. Masego is living proof that this kind of transformation is possible.Masego was interviewed for Now or Never TV program, SABCN 404 documentary, SABC Motswako Tv talk show, Powerfm, Northwest FM, and few magazines such as YOU, DRUM, MOVE, DESTINY and MOJA , sharing her story to an international audience, revealing an incredible response of encouragement and enormous need.Masego is available to speak for conferences, keynotes and workshops.

Book preview

Acknowledgements

I must acknowledge the grace that God has shown me. I can testify that thus far God has been with me and provided for all my needs, Glory to His Name.

My three children for their loyal support. They deserve my sincerest appreciation. Lesedi, Dolapo and Oluwabunmi all shared ideas on the book title. Dolapo, my 13-year-old son’s idea was the best option for the cover.

My appreciation to my father, Shadrack Seshotlo Kwenamore and siblings, Masilo, Masilonyana and Mathapelo. Masilo’s wife, Lebogang for allowing me to use their one-year old daughter – Ditlhonolofatso Kwenamore’s picture on the cover.

Thank you to Apostle Lerato Ursula Moremi for suggesting a different book title for this, my second book.

My appreciation to the following people for allowing God to use them for His bidding in giving me grace:

Contents

Wrong love attraction!

Unforeseen Unemployment

Celebrity life

Angels everywhere!

Family isn’t always blood

Political career

Trip to the USA

Chapter 1

Wrong love attraction!

Naledi was never popular amongst the girls. She really never had a girlfriend. When she got a boyfriend, she wanted a friend out of the relationship, and it was difficult to get both. She believed in love and wanted to be loved like in the romantic movies and novels. She was also very spiritual. Broken people were drawn to her light, always taking, and leaving her empty. She was like a dreamer. Whenever she meets a guy, she visualises a future with him even before studying the relationship, or even a basic understanding of the person. She had a homely character. Always wanting to settle and raise her family. Unfortunately for her, some guys saw this as desperation. Her father always discouraged her from being friends with men. He would always tell her that there is no friendship between a man and a woman, and she thought her father was just being old-fashioned.

Indeed, her father was correct. Xolani, her only trusted male friend shocked her one day. She visited him and he started touching her and asked her to show him the G-string panties she was wearing. Xolani wanted to be intimate with her. She ran away and stopped their friendship.

Naledi was slender by nature and her first boyfriend at 16, Kabelo, who was jealous and very possessive, wanted her to gain weight as he wanted a ‘fit’ girlfriend, as he put it. She wanted to make him happy, and therefore bought Periactive pills for weight gain. After two weeks Naledi started gaining weight. But her weight gain did not make him happy. Instead, he would fight every guy, including his friends, who were interested in her, to back off. He used to say that she was his steady girlfriend and that his family knew her. After fighting them, he would accuse her of cheating. These confrontations always ended in fights between the two of them. She was always trying to defend herself from his insecurities until they broke up.

Naledi was extremely ambitious and dreamt of appearing on TV someday. To this end, she enrolled for acting and advertising courses in Johannesburg in 1991. Every Saturday she would attend these lessons. One Saturday afternoon after her lesson, on her way to catch a taxi back home, she met Kenneth, who claimed to be working at the South African Broadcasting Corporation, the SABC. She was so excited that her dream of appearing on TV was about to become a reality. Kenneth milked this and promised to make her famous. She believed him. On the Thursday, she received a call from him, inviting her for an audition on the Saturday. He asked her to arrive on Friday as auditions were quite early in the morning. Her father was very strict, and she was not allowed to sleep outside. After she hung up, following her telephone conversation with Kenneth, in which they were finalising those details, she thought of how she was going to convince her father about this weekend visit - an entire weekend. Her father was a businessman who had taxis and buses. He was always busy and never attended any school or educational events but always believed whatever she said regarding those events. So, she thought about making an excuse, telling him about acting and advertising graduations in Johannesburg that would be starting at 8:00, knowing very well that he would not be able to attend with her. He then gave her permission to leave on Friday.

On Friday after school Naledi packed her bags and headed to the taxi rank. She caught the last taxi to Johannesburg and arrived at 20:00. Kenneth was waiting for her at the taxi rank. She rode with him to his suburban place. When they arrived, he showed her the room where she would be spending the rest of the weekend and she put her luggage there. They both went to sit in the living room, and later Kenneth prepared dinner. Naledi was comfortable and found Kenneth quite easy to relate to. She trusted him as a good friend. After dinner, she washed the dishes while he dried them. Kenneth started telling her how beautiful she is and that she would crack it in the industry. She was indeed born to be a star, he kept saying. He then invited her to his bedroom to look at the paintings. They both went there. Little did she know what was awaiting her. While they were looking at the paintings and he was pretending to explain the logic behind them, he pushed Naledi onto his bed and held both her hands with one of his. He then proceeded to take off her panties with the other hand and he had sex with her. Naledi was on her menstruations and had inserted a tampon, which he pushed further inside. When he finished forcing himself on her, she went to the bathroom confused, shocked, angry and most of all, embarrassed. Naledi started crying in the bathroom while trying to take the tampon out. She blamed herself for trusting a stranger, but later reminded herself that she wanted to be a star. Kenneth was the key to her stardom, she thought. Naledi was puzzled to see that Kenneth saw absolutely nothing wrong with what he had just done. He kept telling her that she was the woman for him. She went to her room and slept, thinking about the auditions. In the morning, Kenneth woke her up to be ready for the funeral and then the audition afterwards. Naledi had brought her black evening dress and decided to wear it to the funeral. At the funeral, she saw many tv actors. One of the actors came to greet her and told her that she is a born star and he can make it a reality. Naledi could see Kenneth’s jealousy. She then overheard him telling the actor that Naledi was his woman, and his alone.

After the funeral, Kenneth took her to the auditions in Witkoppen. She could see that indeed her dream was becoming a reality when she saw herself in front of the cameras, auditioning. She could feel that she gave it her best. After the audition they both left straight for Kenneth’s home as they were tired. When they arrived, it was 17:00 and Naledi decided to cook pap. This is porridge, made from mealie meal, eaten in the Southern parts of Africa, made to varying degrees of stiffness. It is often eaten with relish like meat or chicken, soup, and vegetables. She made it with wors (an Afrikaans word for a kind of quick-cooking sausage). After eating, Kenneth started expressing his undying love for Naledi and that he saw them having a bright future in the media industry together. Naledi did not love him at all. All she wanted was to be a star and had believed that she met someone who would introduce her to stardom. When it was bedtime, Kenneth asked her to spend the night in his room as they were now lovers. Naledi was devastated but she had nowhere to run at 21:00 in a suburb north of Johannesburg. She spent her second excruciating night in Kenneth’s room, wishing she was home. Kenneth repeatedly forced himself on her the entire night. She was terribly annoyed when he kept on saying that he was going to spend the rest of his life with her. In the morning, Kenneth accompanied her to the taxi rank, and she left Johannesburg at 12:00. When she got home, she took a long, hot bath using different soaps. She felt dirty and felt as if she carried Kenneth’s smell with her. Naledi never told anyone about that weekend. The following Thursday Kenneth called her with the good news of her successful audition. For a minute Naledi was happy and excited, but she could not imagine herself sleeping with Kenneth ever again. She turned down Kenneth’s offer to visit and told him that she was no longer interested in becoming a TV star. Naledi never saw Kenneth ever again.

That’s the way love goes by Janet Jackson was the song of the season and many used to say Naledi looked like the singer. That night at the party, while dancing to the song, her ‘trusted’ friend Xolani asked his friend Lesego to take her home. On their way home, Lesego started expressing his undying love. Naledi was not dating anybody at the time, following the incident with Kenneth. She was single and looking for love. The problem she had with Lesego was that he used to date someone she knew. She was not sure if they were still dating as that person was no longer around. Lesego had, however, assured her that they had broken up. Lesego was one of those popular upcoming young successful guys in the city. He was extremely cute with a sharp pointed nose. Naledi had seen potential and agreed to date him. Their first date was at the cinema and she paid for the tickets. After the movie, they went for lunch at The Ranch restaurant. When it was time for Lesego to pay for the bill he claimed that he forgot his wallet in the car. Naledi paid the bill and they left. She was disappointed as she was aware that he was just using her. She decided to dump him but felt sorry for him when he told her that his mother had just passed away. Lesego then asked Naledi to speak to her father about hiring his bus for the funeral transport. Naledi begged her father not to charge him a lot of money and