Eternally unsatisfied

By Stef Bourgault

“Audacious and inspiring with its 8 success keys, this guide is for
those who want to get to another level in life, starting today.”
Hélène Douville, Success Facilitator, Groupe conseil DCA,
author of “Doublez vos ventes et assumez votre succès! ”


Taking risks is a must if you want to get to the next
level and live the life that you dream of. But how
much are you willing to pay for such an achievement?

• Are you ready to do some serious spring
cleaning in your life right now?
• Who enables you to extend your knowledge?
• What are you planning this year in terms of
mini retirements or vacations?
• How do you go about building your reputation?
• How do you wake your courage up?
• How do people around you really see you?
• What kind of future do you foresee for each
area of your life?
• Who is responsible for throwing the dice in
your life?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Performance
• Release date: Mar 2, 2016
• ISBN: 9782924639023

Book preview

Bourgault

CHAPTER 1

It all starts

with a living picture

Adjusting the zoom to crystal clear

"Imagination is everything.

It is the preview of life’s coming attractions."

— Albert Einstein

The zoom on a camera is what makes the picture appear clearer and closer. It also allows us to see and discern the details we wish to capture. Zooming in will present us our living pictures.

I don’t have the talent needed to pick up a camera, bring it up to my eye, look through the lens, focus on the effect and create the perfect picture to immortalize the present moment in a flash. Moreover, I don’t have the talent to capture the right moment on film. In short, I’m simply not a photographer.

I have to admit, I’ve waited far too long to understand the analogy between a picture and life. Maybe because I could not see anything. Worse, I had ignored the importance and the strength a living picture can reveal. When I finally understood the power the zoom can have on my life, I changed my vision.

When I finally caught on to the fact that I could take all the living pictures I wanted, my life took on a new turn, this time in the right direction, and that is when I started my cleanup. From this moment on, I knew I had the 20/20 vision allowing me to IMAGINE, CREATE and ACT.

Although that part of my life is more personal, I find it important to share it with you. I believe it will help you capture the very essence of what it means to be Eternally Unsatisfied.

In 1998, I was a 33-year-old living in Gatineau, Quebec.

I had a life that some would call enviable, because I was earning a healthy income. I was in decent shape, and some probably saw me as a confident and proud man.

Although I was popular at work, and recognized for my performance, I felt a persistent uneasiness as I was not completely happy and balanced. My life was, quite frankly, unsatisfactory, and come to think of it, I was pitiful and not easy to live with.

Unconsciously, I compared myself to those who failed. I felt empty and unhappy. In fact, I was letting life carry me along, not taking any action for myself, even though I thought I was. I was forced to realize that I was not leading the kind of life I wanted for myself. When we spend our entire lives blaming others, we cannot learn anything. I had unfortunately reached a point at which I had become a firm believer in these three vicious notions:

1.I lacked direction and vision.

2.I did not always keep my word.

3.I was not eating well and slept very little.

As a matter of fact, I had gone so far down the wrong track that my friends wagered that I would not make it beyond my fortieth birthday, fifty at most.

A thousand thanks to all those who bet against me, because it helped me turn it into a challenge for myself. I would’ve loved to have had met someone to give me the best advice in the world, someone I could trust, someone like the person I wanted to become.

That is not what happened. I came to realize that my very own thoughts were holding me back. In order to stop wallowing in glumness and blaming others, I decided to clean up my act, get off the beaten path and take radical actions which were all indispensable to my survival.

The most significant cleanup of my life

I cleaned up my act inside and out, a bit like we do with our possessions come spring or autumn. Easy to say, but not so easy to do. I wanted to avoid provoking or hurting the people around me, out of respect for them, so I thought it through for a long while. I asked myself honestly how important each of these relationships were to me and, more importantly, what I meant to them. Yes, I know it may sound as an offhand way of doing things, but it truly isn’t. To me, it was a question of survival. I went about it the same way I take any business decisions. I questioned myself and examined:

•The degree of angst I felt when I was around them.

•The positive effect in terms of advice, wisdom, generosity and involvement in society they could have on me.

•The positive impact they had on those who were dear to me.

•The impact they left behind whether it be at home, at work or during business activities, some mandatory.

I thought about the pessimistic attitude I had towards everything in my life, about the pitfalls I just could not seem to get out of and my numerous negative relationships. I analyzed my eating habits and my physical condition. My mirror always reflected an image of myself I did not want to see.

A part of me needed to go about the cleanup with caution because I was afraid it might leave a void in my life. My analysis dictated to get rid of some of the habits and ties which had enslaved me for so many years.

I dove in head first

I started to clean up my act without the help of a safety net, guidance nor regrets and ready to face whatever consequences this cleaning was sure to bring about. Day after day, I took unpleasant decisions, although, deep down, I knew it was the road I needed to follow. Why? Because it was time for me to change, to stop expecting from others and to become self-sufficient. I needed to be the creator of my life, of the life I wanted to live.

Throughout this laborious process, I was trying to comprehend my state of being, which was at times miserable. I was changing my old habits and relationships. Feeling unsatisfied, I kept trying to find my way to a new and unknown destination. Alone, looking for landmarks, business models and success tools. I read hundreds of books and attended numerous conferences in the hope that I would find what I had not yet clearly defined, and which still escaped me. I was searching for inspiring people with whom to share my thoughts, people who would guide me, but at that time I did not yet know any successful, daring people. But you know what? It was to be expected, because I just did not attract that kind of individuals. Just remember how I thought before starting to clean-up my life.

Some of the books I read talked about the practice of visualization by setting clear goals and by seeing oneself reaching them mentally. The theory seemed somewhat vague to me even though I knew what it meant, but I did not quite know how to go about it.

Other books spoke of intuition, in the sense of feeling and seeing what you wish to become and have. In all honesty, as a rational man, it was hard for me to conceive and implement such a process. I could understand what it was about, but I lacked the confidence I needed to believe in the attainment of a new life.

Without any answers, keys to success, tools to guide me, I just kept cleaning, even without any answers, success keys or tools. I pushed forward blindly, without knowing the where, who or what of it. This transformation process took me months, but it seemed like years.

Troubled by my actions, I noticed the people around felt insecure. They questioned my sanity and my general state of well-being. The cleaning process was under way and I felt as if I had caught my hand in the rollers of an old washing machine. I had forged a new path for myself, a difficult one no doubt, but a necessary one.

Surprisingly, I felt less pressure and obligation. I had the feeling that I was not pretending as much as I used to, that I was being true to myself. The more I cleaned and made space for real things, the more liberated I felt, and I started to see that it was possible for me to outgrow my problems. I even wondered why I had waited so long to do so.

What a beneficial and liberating experience! I had the feeling that the most important part of my cleanup was well under way, and that the tsunami was finally behind me.

Then a new thought made its way into my mind. How could I get to another level? To the next level? How could I reach the same levels as the individuals I saw basking in the glory they’ve achieved by balancing their personal and professional lives. How was I to become one of the people that I no longer envy, but now admire for their courage and their rigorous discipline? Those whom I find so inspiring, bold and intelligent? How could I become like them and model myself after them?

A very good friend of mine who achieved all levels of success with ease and confidence kept telling me that it all starts with a dream. This trustworthy man inspired me to outdo myself, and still does to this day. He is a model of professional success and is part of my circle of friends, which I will tell you more about in the seventh chapter. This man believes in his dreams, the ones he had and accomplished as well as the ones that are coming to life now! I am lucky enough to be privy to his projects and, believe me, he still aspires for more while getting ready, to skillfully and strategically reach the next level. For this man, the power of the word dream is highly significant. Although I understood his thought process and could see the results, I still found it hard to give a concrete form to the word dream, which seemed too vague a notion. The rational man that I was needed clarity and precision to truly adhere to that power and put it to use.

Inspired by the fact that everything stems from a dream, I went on to imagine that everything can also start with a picture – a living one! From then on, everything fell into place.

Everything seemed more tangible, easier to wrap my brain around.

More importantly,

I finally understood that I possessed an essential key that would enable me to reach the next level.

That key was to clean up my life!

How to create a living picture of the life I want to live

Even though it still seemed foggy at times, I remember at one point deciding to create a living picture of what I wanted to do with my life. I still have problems explaining how that need came about. I don’t really remember when or where it happened, but I do know that I firmly intended to start a new life. I’m convinced that the cleaning had done its job, because my ideas were taking shape and I could sense all of the many possibilities that were offered to me. My mind was open and I was ready to change. Without