Pursuit of Relentless: a guidebook for your best life possible

By Alaina Nadig

This is a book for the curious. A book that will help you transform where you are today into the future you have always dreamed of. Being on the Pursuit of Relentless is a journey full of ups and downs. It is about growing your level of resilience and mental toughness. Challenging the status quo. Getting into the hard questions and really a

• Language: English
• Publisher: Relentless Leadership Development
• Release date: Jun 1, 2022
• ISBN: 9781778038815

Book preview

1

The Pursuit

Have you ever seen an Oscar winning film that had no dilemma, struggle, or triumph? Me neither.

-Alaina Nadig

    Hi, my name is Alaina. I come from a pretty normal background: middle class family from small town Powell River, British Columbia. My parents divorced when I was two years old.  My dad was an alcoholic at the time, so we didn't see him much.  My mom raised us, four kids on her own with the help of my grandmother, Peggy.  She made sure to do everything in her power to raise us as kind and loving individuals who were determined to challenge ourselves to become the best we could possibly be.

Mom was the youngest of seven kids.  My Grandma, helped us out a lot too.  She taught me when to flip the pancakes and how not to burn down the church accidentally on Christmas Eve when the candle slipped out of my hand.  She laughed and said Now that's what you call HOLY SMOKE!  We had amazing support from our aunts and uncles too, a big family to help whenever something went wrong like Kyla breaking her leg at the park, etc.  

I learned from a young age that being busy was normal. I watched my mom work multiple jobs to put food on the table for us kids. We lived in fairly nice homes growing up and went to great schools with great teachers. We also went to the Baptist church every Sunday.

    We didn't have a very wealthy childhood by any means, but we learned strong values. We learned how to value family time and we learned how to make good use of what we had. We never were starving but we always ate everything off of our plates. We were always loved and always cherished and always put to work, sponge painting the house or helping cook, clean, do the dishes (which I despise to this day) or helping mow the lawn. We learned work ethic from a young age. I am so glad I didn’t have everything handed to me on a silver platter. I learned how to use the skills that I have to further myself. 

     I spent a lot of time outside with my siblings. Me and my sister Kyla, that is closest to me in age, spent a lot of time making rose water perfume and doing cartwheels and making sandcastles, playing on the swings and enjoying the beauty of the outdoors.

I always loved the outdoors. Growing up in BC was such a blessing. My brother loved video games, my other sister Brittney loved sports. Kyla and I typically liked the same hobbies. We spent a lot of time together.

    I didn't really have very many friends. I had a few very solid friends that are still my friends to this day. I was an odd duck, I got made fun of a lot for being tall and smart. I was always the friendly giant in the class. By grade 5 I was already taller than my mom and most of my classmates in school. I hated being tall. I felt that I was so different from everyone else, but I just wanted to fit in. I wanted people to like me, as I am sure everyone does. These types of experiences are imprinted in our mind. Those moments when we craft our identity.

I was telling myself that I was different, that I stood out from the crowd. I thought back then that my insecurities would hinder my success. Man, was I wrong. The things that make us unusual, unique, are the things that make us stand out from the pack. It is what helps us gain the attention of those who are on the same mission as us. My question to you, what makes you unique? (we will dig into this more in a bit).

If people are rude or people are treating you badly, it's probably got nothing to do with you. It's most likely an insecurity that they have about themselves. Learning the skills to talk it out will help you go into challenging situations with ease.

I didn't know that as a kid. So, I spent a long time trying to come to terms with the fact that it’s okay to be different. I thought I was weird. I was a foot taller than practically everyone else in my class. I was just an awkward kid. It was lonely.

    My friends helped me through the bullying when I was having a hard time in school or getting beat up or having food thrown at me when I was walking home from school. That happened to me all the time for no reason. Needless to say, kids can be mean. We can teach our kids and the kids around us how to love themselves and stand up for themselves in a positive manner. We can’t prevent bullying, but we can do our best to be kind and help the young ones build self confidence and a strong identity. Standing up for themselves and understanding it is okay to be different and not to try to fit in or keep up with the Jones’s.

    I have also struggled with food addiction for a long time. It has had such a massive hold on me that I have to strategically plan my meals every single day just to keep myself in shape. Growing up, we always had food on the table and because we were fairly poor, it was make sure you eat everything on your plate. Bless my mom for making sure we ate.

I was the chubby kid, never good at sports, always picked last in gym class. I never really focused on what being healthy meant to me.  I loved being outdoors and going for walks but when it came to exercise...my routines were not strong.  I was more focused on getting straight A's than learning how to live a long life.  

    It's crazy to just look back and go holy, we've come so far, and we don't even realize the things that we were dealing with before were prepping us for life’s curveballs today. We don't realize what our parents have gone through to give us the life we have, or what our siblings have gone through or how it affected their upbringing. And yet, we judge people because they are different?

The things that we think about can really make a massive impact on our lives, whether that's positive or negative. I heard a saying a few years ago and it goes like this other people’s opinion of me is none of my business. That quote made me think; why do I care what other people think of me if I know that my intentions are good? Maybe they don’t even know me and yet they judge me from my appearance. A woman of my stature can be a little intimidating.

I like to say, I’m not for everybody and I am okay with that. Same goes to you. There will be people who don’t necessarily like you and that is actually a good thing. Maybe that person doesn’t align with your values. People can be cruel, but we can choose to not associate with everyone.

When we are young, we don't know how to defend ourselves. We don't know how to love ourselves properly. We don't know how to take care of ourselves in a way that's serving our highest self. So elementary school, like I said, taught me some good lessons. It taught me that I shouldn't trust everybody. I shouldn't want to spend time with everybody. I don't want to be popular if popular means being rude and obnoxious. I don't want to be just like everybody else.

I want to be different.

I want to be loving. I want to be kind. I want to be generous. I want to be the person who can make a difference in the world. And now I have found in myself the power to do that. I believe there is greatness in everyone. The world needs more positive people who are willing to stand up and fight for what is right. Unity. Respect. Happiness. Freedom. It takes people like you to be a pillar of light in your community. A person who is willing to do what is challenging for the greater good. Smiling, staying strong, giving back to others in need. That is the Arete way. Always in the pursuit of a better world, more contribution, more cooperation, more generosity.

We moved around a couple of times. So, I did get to meet a lot of really cool people. I excelled in school when it came to the academic side of things, but I was always really creative too. I was good at culinary arts. I had always dreamed of becoming a pastry chef. Baking cakes all the time, breads, cookies, muffins…I loved food. My creative flare on the recipes always created a new an exciting flavor for me to try. Not all my creations were good, that is for sure! I got the nickname Cookie from my Grandmother. I never knew why she called me that, I just figured it was because I loved to bake or maybe because I was so sweet.

When I was 17 years old, I got offered the CTC program. It was a college program that trains high school students in their last year of school to do a trade. They told me that I could go to the Professional Baking Program for FREE if I was willing to relocate. I couldn’t turn down that kind of opportunity!

For 10 months straight I went to school at 5:00am until 11:00am Monday to Friday. After that, I caught the bus to Tim Hortons where I worked through college part time. I worked 12:00 to 4:00 every single day that I was going to school. And then I worked Saturdays.

After all of that is said and done, I also did my grade 12 English and Biology online until I went to bed. Intense, yet I loved the challenge. I believed that I was put there for a reason. Given that opportunity so that I could pursue my dreams. And I did.

    In College I was very insecure, very angry and I was not very good at getting my point across in a positive way. It doesn't have to stay that way and that's what we need to understand. We have the ability to change everything in our lives, and all it takes is some good mentors and some personal development to break through those barriers and understand why things went the way that they did and how our perception of things can change with a conversation.

When you go through pastry school, you must try everything that you make and that's just the way that it is. So, guess what happened when I was in pastry school. I got up to about 275 pounds and I didn't really care. I didn't see what the habits were doing to me. I didn't see how it was affecting my life, and then I started ending up in the hospital. I started going to the doctor every couple weeks, trying to figure out why I could barely breathe. I was in so much pain. I couldn't figure out what was going on. I thought there was something wrong with me. It