Hilda: Queen of the Rock

By Paul Kater

A few new adventures come to pass when Hilda and friends are asked by a Queen called Cadwyn to help in determining why her daughter isn't sensitive enough to be a princess. The good old pea-under-the-mattress experiment fails over and over again.

At the same time, Queen Velma calls for assistance as yet another queen calls for Velma's assistance. This other queen has a problem determining who will take her throne when she steps down. This problem isn't the average royal problem either.

And who will be the Queen of the Rock? You may have to wait until the end to find out!

• Language: English
• Publisher: Paul Kater
• Release date: Aug 3, 2019
• ISBN: 9780463829608

Paul Kater

Paul Kater was born in the Netherlands in 1960. He quickly developed a feel for books and languages but ended up in the IT business despite that. Books and languages never ceased to fascinate him, so since 2003 he's been actively writing, encouraged by friends on the internet. The internet is the reason why most of his work is in English. A friend asking for writing help is why some of his writing is now also in Dutch. Paul currently lives in Cuijk, the Netherlands, with his books, possibly with cats, and the many characters he's developed in the past years, who claim he is a figment of their imagination.

Book preview

Normality has been restored. Anything you still can't cope with is therefore your own problem.

Trillian, on board the Heart of Gold.

(From the Douglas Adams book, the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.)

1. Competition

Times had been difficult around the house of the magicals, but that was about to change. Hilda was relieved about that, but the worst had yet to happen. Actually it was about to happen.

You need to push!

I am pushing!

You're not! Gelsey, Sunrise's finest midwife, wasn't satisfied with how Hilda was handling this. You'll never get this baby delivered if you keep holding it in, honourable witch.

"I am not keeping it in! Crappedy craaaaaa...."

-=-=-=

William, Rune and Oona sat in the living room and heard what was happening. The wizard kept an eye on Isla, who had just started to walk. She was moving along the bookshelves, holding on to the big tomes with her little hands.

Is Mama in pain? Rune looked at the staircase as if he wanted to run up and help Hilda.

No, she's not. William was convinced of that. Hilda would resort to magic before pain became an issue. He did wonder why she was going through all this. His sweetwitch had told him how easy it had been for her mother, who had relied on nothing but magic to give birth. On the other hand, Hilda usually wasn't the one to take the easy way out.

Push! they heard Gelsey command Hilda. The word triggered several things. Isla, holding on to a smaller book, jumped for shock (as far as her tiny legs could make her jump). Her motion pulled the book from the shelf (her fingers forgot to let go). Isla's behind and the book both raced towards the floor and it probably was the book that won. To her credit, Isla screamed harder than the book.

Holy Bejeebus, said William as he got up to rescue the little girl. Before he reached the little girl (who screamed more from surprise of finding herself on the floor than from pain), another scream came from the upper floor. It was Hilda's.

Oh my, said the house. That was quick.

Mama! Rune and Oona ran up the stairs, with William and Isla in hot pursuit. By the time they reached the bedroom door, they heard a baby's cry, while Gelsey complimented Hilda on a job well done.

Hilda! William opened the door and barged in, together with Oona and Rune. They saw Gelsey standing near the bed. She held a tiny, squealing baby upside down. What are you doing?

I know what I'm doing, said Gelsey, so you'd better let me do it. She knew she was the master of this situation, so magical people didn't frighten her today.

Hilda, how are you? William walked to the bed and sat down next to his witch. She looked tired, she was red in her face and there was so much less of her suddenly. All those months she'd been walking around, getting bigger, seemed to have disappeared. The result of that was now in Gelsey's hands, who placed the tiny human on Hilda's breast.

I don't know, William, said Hilda, who felt empty and relieved and tired and a thousand things more, but we have a son.

-=-=-

Hilda sat outside, basking in the sun, with a tiny bundle in her arms. Oona, Rune and Isla shared another sun-bed, observing the sleeping baby. Oona was once again lecturing Rune (and to a lesser degree Isla) on the fact that they now had a little brother, until she reached the end of her wisdom. This was where she had stopped talking several times before.

Mama... what is his name? Have papa and you decided yet?

Hilda looked into Oona's big, black eyes for a moment. No. Not yet. Naming a child was complicated, she had noticed.

You could call him Rune, said Rune. It's a good name. I like it very much.

That would make things complicated, Rune, Hilda said. Suppose I would call your little brother and you wouldn't know if you or he should come to me.

Oh. Rune nodded. Maybe Rune the second? Then I'd be Rune the first. He'd suggested that about a dozen time already, and a dozen times Hilda had told him it would be better for the little boy to have his own name, because there were so many good names. If there are so many, why don't you just pick one? had Rune's question been after hearing that, and each time Hilda had promised him he'd find out later. Much later, she'd added, to avoid questions about periods of time.

William came outside with the announcement that dinner was on the table. Oona and Rune cheered and ran up to him. Isla remained where she sat and looked at Hilda. She pointed at the tiny baby and said, Mick.

What was that, little one? Hilda was surprised, because so far Isla hadn't said a word.

Mick. The one year old insisted by repeating the word several more times.

"William, Isla spoke! She said Mick!"

What's a mik? William had already gone inside with the oldest two but came back to listen to Isla. This was either special or he was about to learn something new from this world. Despite living here for a long time, something new came up once in a while.

Crappedy crap, I don't know. She pointed at our baby and...

Mick. Isla got up and leaned against Hilda's knee. Mick. The little girl carefully touched the thin blanket that kept the baby warm. Mick, she said once more, as to make her point. Her little faced beamed as if she was competing with the sun.

Mick. William sat down with Hilda and took Isla on his knee. Where did you pick up that name, baby girl?

Isla looked at the wizard and gave him a big smile. Pabba Wiyam!

Right, said William. You win. Her smiles always won.

Mick. Hilda sampled the name. Wizard, why don't we call him Mick? That's a good name. Short and strong. And easy to yell when he does something bad.

Mick. Isla agreed with her and reached for William's nose and squeezed it. She laughed as he sneezed. William picked her up and carried her inside, where Rune and Oona were already at the table, playing magical ping-pong with some vegetables.

Kids! Stop that! Hilda's outburst broke their concentration, which made the vegetables land on the table, next to the bowl they'd been served in. Now look what you did. She turned to her wizard, who was so good with children.

William put a hand in Hilda's back and directed her to her chair. He sat down, seating Isla on his knee, and looked at the food acrobats. Why did you do that?

It was fun. Oona wasn't impressed with the stern way she was addressed.

And now it's cold, William said. We're going to eat cold vegetables because of you two.

No, we're not. Rune's eyes lit up. We put them on the plates and heat up the food. It's easy. He pointed his index finger at the plate, as if his words hadn't been clear enough.

William swallowed. He'd never had children before. Having Rune and Oona here had been great so far, but since some time they'd become a bit too free around the house. The fact they were magical didn't make things much easier.

Oh, please... Hilda popped up her wand and corrected the situation. Don't make a fuss over unfussable things, William. We have more important things to handle. William sighed. Was Hilda making things too easy on the children? It soon became clear she didn't. And as to you two: one more time I catch you playing with food or anything else we told you not to play with, you're grounded.

The effect was instantaneous. Rune and Oona sat up, arranged their plates and suddenly looked like role model children. Being grounded Hilda style was one of the worst things they could face. It meant no broom-flying for at least a week, and they loved their brooms. William had often taken them with him, on his visits to King Walt and Queen Velma. The royals loved the two, and it kept king and queen from wondering where Hilda was. Hilda had given up flying after her belly had started to get in the way.

Hilda looked at her wizard and winked. For the rest of the afternoon, or at least during the meal, the children would behave. Hilda'd gotten quite proficient in eating with a fork in one hand and a magically supported knife, while William shared his food with Isla, who always sat on his knee when they were eating.

After finishing her food, Oona asked if they could visit the king and queen again that afternoon. They are funny. And I want to see Snow White. Queen Velma had told her and Rune about their daughter.

Snow White is very busy, and she lives far away. When you're bigger we can go there, William said, hoping that Snow White's flock of children would be ready to face these two by then. I planned to visit Johanna. They hadn't seen nor heard of the teacher-witch in a while.

Good idea. In that time Mick and I will lay down and have a nap. Hilda looked forward to that.

Right... William looked at the small girl on his knee. In that case Isla will come with us. Hilda looked at him. And yes, I'll be very careful and we'll fly very slow. The wicked witch relaxed only slightly after hearing that. No matter how good a broom-pilot William was, she always felt it her responsibility to take Isla with her. Now, with Mick in the family, she'd have to get used to Isla flying with William, because Mick would be with her for the coming years.

"Very well. Say hi for me when you get there."

Hilda walked outside with them as they got ready to go. Oona and Rune proudly held their new brooms. They'd once made their own, but they had outgrown those at a scary speed, so William had made new ones for them. Look out, you two, she said to the oldest two. Listen to Papa William, and do what he says.

Yes, Mama. Rune as well as Oona looked at her and smiled. That was as good a promise as Hilda could get. She watched the two get onto their brooms.

William was already hovering, with Isla safely in front of him. He held an arm around her that she held on to. Nap well, sweetwitch, he said.

Mind your own business, Hilda said, knowing he understood her thank you. She looked at Mick. And don't be too long. And Rune, no annoying the dragons when you come back. They don't like that. After one of their outings, Rune had taken it upon himself to fly his broom around the dragons' heads several times. The creatures had been good about it for a while but at some point the purple one had slapped at the little boy as a warning. That was enough for Hilda and William to keep the children away from the dragons unless they were there too.

Right then. Here we go. William went up slowly, keeping a decent measure of control on the other two brooms. Oona usually was good about staying with him, but Rune was a lot wilder. That had provided him with scratches and bruises more than once.

Hilda stood watching until the three shapes had become too small to see as they flew over the forest towards Sunrise. Come, young man, she said to Mick. Time for us to take a... Oh, crappedy crap. Right, first that. The aroma rising up from the baby was unmistakable.

By the time Mick was cleaned up, William and the children had reached Sunrise. On the way there Oona and Rune had asked William if they could stop at the cute, two-tower house of Johanna. Oona wanted to talk to it and Rune wanted to see if the door would now open for him.

Hello, cute house. Oona stood waiting for its reply, while William watched the girl. Oona hardly ever showed herself as the young girl she was, unless she was talking to Johanna's house. Rune leaned against the door and mumbled to it.

Hello, little witch, said the house. Oh my, you really look your best today. It always said that, and it was never wasted on Oona.

Do you think so? Oona turned around. From the back also?

Most certainly, said the house. It's almost difficult to decide which side of you looks best. You have such pretty hair, little Oona.

Papa... It won't open... Rune walked up to the wizard and took his hand. I think the house doesn't like me.

Oh, little Rune, the house immediately said, I really like you. Much even. But I know how little boys can do things to the inside of houses, and I really like my inside the way it is, and so does Johanna. When she is here you can come in, I promise.

Oona giggled. Again something that hardly ever happened, except perhaps when Shevaughn was around. Maybe we should go to the school and ask Johanna to come. William knew how she loved going inside the house that looked far too small for even her and Rune together. Baba Yaga's magic made it a perfect home though. So perfect that the children had occasionally slept at Johanna's place. That was also how the house had learnt what Rune could do, and a warned house...

2. Of letters and numbers

William walked through Sunrise with the two older children. Isla's legs were too short for that so he let her sit on his broom and held on to her hand. The little girl loved this way of transport and seemed to enjoy the looks of people who pointed at her. Oona and Rune made their brooms fly along too. Even without a passenger on them, that attracted quite some attention.

Honourable wizard, said one of the people they passed, isn't it dangerous to let that little girl sit on the broom like that? The good man looked genuinely worried. Of course he had no idea of how well Isla was protected.

You don't need to worry, said Isla, sending the man into half a stupor. My Papa will not let me fall.

But... but... The man pointed at Isla. She can't talk yet. She's too small for that. He looked at William for some moral support and emotional relief.

Isla can. She's a witch's child, which makes all the difference. William patted the man on the shoulder before they walked on. We're safe. As they progressed to the street where Johanna's school was, William looked at the little girl. You shouldn't scare people like that, Isla. You're always silent, so why did you do that?

Isla looked at the wizard and smiled. In silence.

Holy Bejeebus...

She's going to be a handful, Papa, said Rune, sounding far wiser than he was. William just shook his head.

They found the door to the school locked. This meant Johanna was still teaching some people. At first she'd put a sign on the door to tell people they shouldn't disturb the students, but since most of the people couldn't read, the often ignored sign had been replaced by a lock that was not going to be ignored.

I'll go and look what she's doing, said Oona. Quickly she hopped onto her broom and rose up to the roof, to look through the large, glass roof-panels. They are looking at books, Papa, the black-haired girl reported. Oh, no. They are looking up.

From the street level William saw how Oona also looked up, to find out what the people in the school were looking at. Obviously she couldn't see it. I think you should come down now, Oona. I'm sure Johanna has seen you, so she knows we're here.

Oona descended slowly. She knew it would take a while for the teacher-witch to appear, since the students still looked very serious. Is it hard to learn to read? she asked William while she hovered her broom next to his shoulder.

Not very hard, said William, who could only draw from his own, non-magical experience. Maybe Johanna wants to teach you.

Yes, yes, me too! Rune jumped and waved his arms.

Me too, said Isla, which made William frown. Did she know what she was saying or was she just repeating what her brother had just said? Isla had more than once surprised Hilda and him already.

William took his time to tell them about the advantages of reading and writing. The three children (even Isla) listened attentively and hardly noticed the school door opening. It was the loud comments thanking Johanna for the lesson that broke everyone's concentration.

William. Children! Johanna came out with the last few students. How nice to see you here. What brought you over?

Oona looked at the teacher-witch. Our brooms. It was clear that Oona thought that an odd question. No magicals with brooms would walk that distance. Johanna's laughing made Oona smile.

We thought to drop by and see how you're doing, William explained their presence.

And we want to learn the reading and writing, Rune said. He wasn't very patient at times.

Me too, Isla declared from William's broom, making not just William but also Johanna look at her.

You're a little young to learn, Isla, said Johanna who picked the girl up and gave her a big hug. But if you want to, we can certainly give it a try.

Rune is my brother and Oona is my sister. And Mick is my brother too, Isla stated. She looked happy and quite comfortable on Johanna's arm.

They are indeed, Johanna said and grinned. Come in. Inside is a great place for talking about reading-lessons. Rune said he wanted to go inside Johanna's cute house, but the adults voted for the school.

While William and Johanna were talking reading-business, Oona and Rune perused the many books that were on the many shelves. Isla walked along with them, holding Rune's hand. What neither William nor Johanna knew was that two women, an older one and a younger one, were approaching the village of Sunrise.

-=-=-

Twok

Hilda, who usually was very sensitive to that sound, didn't open her eyes. Not even one of them.

Ehm. You may not have noticed, but someone just shot an arrow into the front door. The house was quite displeased.

I did notice. I'm just not in the mood to get up, put Mick where I can't see him and load work on my neck. Hilda was satisfied with that response. It also pleased her that the house was silent for a while.

The rascal shooter is someone who hasn't worked for the king very long, the house announced.

How do you know all that? Hilda still kept her eyes closed.

The note bears the royal seal, the arrow's too well made for common archers, and others know there is a pole right next to me to shoot arrows into.

Hilda's eyes opened, wide and fast. From the king? She was surprised how much the house could deduct from so little information as a note on an arrow.

The seal so much as suggests it.

What does he want? Hilda didn't want to get up but the house declared it couldn't actually unroll the note and read it to her. Crappe... She looked at the sleeping baby boy in her arm. Hmm. I shouldn't. But he's asleep. Crappedy crap. Mick opened his eyes and smiled at the wicked witch. I knew I shouldn't have. Go back to sleep, you.

"Bllll" Mick produced a stream of bubbles as he uttered that. He also tried to wiggle his short arms out of the wrappings that kept him warm. One of his favourite pastimes was grabbing Hilda's hair. It was the main reason she'd made sure his arms were not out and ready for reaching immediately.

Oh no, you don't, said Hilda as she sat up. A quick spell moved her hair into two braids that were out of Mick's reach. She reached for a handkerchief and wiped the baby's mouth before she got up. Now let's see what's up with his Waltiness. As she approached the door, the house opened it, to make it easy for her. It also meant the arrow was out of its door quicker.

Oh. Hilda found herself lacking an arm. Holding an arrow and Mick it required a touch of magic to undo the message. She read it. Oh. Ah. What? Hmm. Thinking about the message she walked to the kitchen. Can you fix me some... tea? She'd abandoned the hope that the kitchen would ever make a decent cup of coffee.

She watched the kettle fill itself from the water barrel. The stove spit up a flame over which the kettle patiently waited for its content to boil. In that