Hilda: Magic on the Rocks

By Paul Kater

Book 10 of the series around Hilda the Wicked Witch. Hilda and William receive a visitor with a peculiar message. Things in the land of the magicals are going very wrong as wizards and witches start to have problems. One thing leads to another, and through all of this the magical heroes are facing snow and ice, which doesn’t make things much easier. Fortunately they don’t have to face these challenges alone.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Paul Kater
• Release date: Jan 11, 2013
• ISBN: 9781301174164

Paul Kater

Paul Kater was born in the Netherlands in 1960. He quickly developed a feel for books and languages but ended up in the IT business despite that. Books and languages never ceased to fascinate him, so since 2003 he's been actively writing, encouraged by friends on the internet. The internet is the reason why most of his work is in English. A friend asking for writing help is why some of his writing is now also in Dutch. Paul currently lives in Cuijk, the Netherlands, with his books, possibly with cats, and the many characters he's developed in the past years, who claim he is a figment of their imagination.

Book preview

Hilda - Magic on the Rocks

by Paul Kater

Book 10 in the Hilda the Wicked Witch series.

Published by the author at Smashwords as a member of the

Alexandria Publishing Group

© 2012 Paul Kater

License Notes:

This e-book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This e-book may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Previous books in this series:

1. Hilda the wicked witch (Smashwords, July 2010)

2. Hilda - Snow White Revisited (Smashwords, September 2010)

3. Hilda - The Challenge (Smashwords, December 2010)

4. Hilda and Zelda (Smashwords, February 2011)

5. Hilda - Cats (Smashwords, April 2011)

6. Hilda - Lycadea (Smashwords, June 2011)

7. Hilda - Back to school (Smashwords, September 2011)

8. Hilda - Dragon Master (Smashwords, January 2012)

9. Hilda - Aiaia (Smashwords, December 2012)

Disclaimer.

This is a work of fiction, but not an ordinary one. Any resemblance with certain people, preferably alive, is not be coincidental. The most likely victims are mentioned in the acknowledgements. Any other people that may seem to play a part in this book don't.

Acknowledgement:

I would like to thank the following people who all played a part in making this book a reality:

* My girlfriend SephiPiderwitch, for creating the cover image. (See more of her work at http://pidersketches.sephipiderwitch.com/)

* My wonderful friend Carol Edwards, who again managed to find all the mistakes I tried to hide.

* Ielja Strik, who will henceforth be known as Elfin.

* Alphons Gietman, who will enjoy being called Mokum.

* JoAnn Paules, from now on responding to Johanna Pozzle.

* Crystal Funderburk, reincarnated as Crystolyne.

* Angel Rhett, magicked into Ranee.

* Lonie Willemsen, who will have to learn to pronounce Alo Anapola Lonapoli Lona.

Contents:

1. Laughing with the king

2. Glomorra, here we come

3. Who finished Lambaugh?

4. Marcus

5. Eleonora Skufflebridge

6. At Skuffy's

7. Are we done yet?

8. Nash Ville

9. Braxas explains. A bit.

10. Mrs. Yaga

11. Where there's smoke, there's soup

12. Babs talks

13. Lost in the weather

14. On the broom again

15. The magician

16. In from the cold

17. A blast in snow and ice

18. Frozen teachers

19. Going for the ice

20. A new plan is made

21. An arachnid poem

22. Blanket coffin

23. Alo Anapola Lonapoli Lona

24. Weird

25. It's all in the ice

26. About the Wayze

27. The Wayze - a first impression

28. Where do we go from here?

29. The old castle

30. Giants are big people

31. I don't want to know

32. The mountain

33. Showdown

34. Four frozen children

35. Ice rock

36. How do you stop ice giants?

37. Beans and other stuff

38. The end of an ice age

39. Home

1. Laughing with the king

Two very disapproving cats regarded the two soggy magical humans they pretended to look after. The wet king next to the two, sitting in the fountain in front of his palace, was of less interest to them, but these two people in their dark clothing were behaving in an outrageous manner, which could affect the cats' reputation. More appropriately: they were behaving outrageously again.

The king's wife stood at a safe distance from the splashing water and looked almost as disapproving as the cats did. Walter. Stop that!

Too late, it's over! King Walt called back as he got up and waded to the side of the fountain. William the wizard gave the king a hand to get him on dry land safely. Thank you, William. That was fun.

Hilda offered to dry the king, but he declined. I'll go in and scare some people with this outfit, but thank you for offering. It's been too long ago that we had a water battle like this, Grimhilda. I can't thank you enough. King Walt loved their games around the fountain, and lately the magicals had taken the time to come up with some interesting new twists.

To the relief of Obsi and Grim, the magicals made themselves presentable and dry without first taking an embarrassing trip home. They paced around the waiting brooms, tails twitching. The humans had their fun, now things should be normal again for a while.

Next time I'll change the water into jelly, Hilda told William as they picked up cats and mounted the brooms to fly off. Let's see how far we can go.

We'll have to find something to occupy the queen with though, William said. She seems bored, and keeps interfering.

We'll think of something. When we can have fun with a king, we can certainly have fun with a queen. With these wise words the magicals kicked off and took to the skies while two cats looked at each other and performed the feline version of frowns.

-=-=-

There was a witch here, while you were gone, the house announced as Hilda and William entered.

Who was she, and what did she want?

The house sighed, making some sideboards creak for added effect. I am a house, not an interviewer of strange visitors.

You're also very nosy, so tell us.

You offend me. But very well. The witch was not from near here, talked with an accent. Her name was Ranee and she seems to own something called Ranee's Witcherette, although I have no idea what that is. She was, of course, looking for you, because there is something strange happening in the area where she lives. Witches arguing, little fights and things like that. She wanted to know if you had heard of things like that happening here.

Hilda, sitting on the purple couch in front of the fireplace, looked at the ceiling. And what did you tell her?

That she should come back when you are in, because I don't know everything that you hear.

William came out of the kitchen, floating a tray with mugs of tea and cookies in front of him. You're quite well informed for a house that is not an interviewer of visitors.

The house remained silent, finding this remark unworthy of a sharp riposte. It also remained silent when there was a knock on the door, mere moments later.

House, you're really being a pain today, Hilda muttered as she got up to open the door. And who are you? she asked the person standing outside. Clearly it was a witch; Hilda sensed the magical aura that hung around the woman.

I am Ranee. Although some call me Angel, but don't ask me why. The woman had long white hair hanging down in a dazzling amount of tiny braids. There were coloured feathers braided into it, and beads that sparkled in the light when she moved her head. Her black eyes curiously examined Hilda. Are you Grimhilda the wicked witch? The house had been correct, the woman spoke with an accent, one that Hilda had never heard before.

Yes, I am, and I'm glad that my fame has spread, since you're clearly not from around here. Come in, we're just having tea. As Hilda let Ranee in, she asked: So why do people call you Angel?

I have no idea. That's why I said not to ask. It's useless. Ranee looked around the witch's living room and saw the wizard. Oh! You must be Williard!

No. Close, but not quite. It's William. William the wizard. Come in and have a seat. Tea? William magicked up an extra cup. Sugar? Cream? Lemon? Spiders?

Spiders? Ranee frowned as she sat down in a chair next to the couch.

Hilda laughed. It's not common, but we can cater for everything. But in this case he's just being silly. So what brings you here? You sound like you're from far away.

I am from far away indeed. Have you ever heard of Glomorra? Ranee asked Hilda as she kept an eye on William. The wizard was pouring tea and she clearly wanted to make sure that the spiders were indeed nothing more than a jest. William noticed the woman's stare and conjured up a few chocolate spiders next to her cup, which made Ranee grin.

Glomorra. Is that a place? Sounds more like a disease. And no, I've never heard of it, Hilda shrugged.

Ranee scowled at the wicked witch for a moment. It is a very nice place, not so warm as here. It's in the north.

William wondered about about her 'warm' remark. It was early spring and certainly not warm. Ranee had to be from very far up north.

Ranee then explained about the bickering among the magicals in her area, and the occasional small fight. We wondered if other people had heard about that, so a group of us set out to travel in every direction and find magical people in other areas. I was sent here.

Hilda shrugged again. Arguing among witches is the most common thing. We all think we know best and try to convince each other of that. And sometimes that does not happen in the nicest way. Is that why you came all the way here? The witch could hardly believe that. She also felt a bit ticked off that Ranee had come to her on assignment, not because of her fame.

Ranee sipped from her tea and confiscated one of the chocolate spiders. Oh, nice, we have almost no chocolate in Glomorra.

Hilda sighed. That makes it even worse than a disease!

Ranee looked a bit hurt, but repressed that by going for another chocolate spider. The bickering in our area is not just that anymore. Witches and sorcerers have been injured.

Hilda dropped her tea mug, scaring the willies out of the panicking goldfish. William skillfully captured the mug before it did any damage. What?! Talk about worse than a disease! Crappedy crap. Injured how? Ranee certainly had captured the witch's attention, and that of the wizard as well.

Well, it started when two witches had an argument, and they started throwing canon balls at each other. Charged with magic and explosives.

Oh. That's taking things a bit far, they must have had quite a difference of opinion, Hilda said, wondering what might have caused such an outburst of anger among magicals.

Not really. One had made a new broom, and the other thought it looked a bit odd, Ranee explained.

Uhm... William had no other words for that.

Magic and explosives. Over a new broom. Hilda had a hard time believing that. Brooms were personal, and their looks did not matter except for the fashionable flowerwitch who only used a broom for sweeping anyway.

Ranee nodded, as she eyed the last chocolate spider. May I?

Of course. William made the thing crawl to Ranee.

Yes, all that over a broom. And that is just one incident, Grimhilda. We had a few sorcerers getting into a magical dispute and one of them ended up missing a leg. And a troll-worker summoned a troll to flatten an entire village just because they refused him entry to the tavern. Which was with reason, by the way, because troll-workers smell like trolls. Ranee rubbed her nose at the memory. And that is why I came here, to ask if you have heard of similar incidents.

Hilda was certain they hadn't. They'd remember things like that. I'll ask Baba Yaga, maybe she heard something.

Babs? William wondered. What would she hear. all alone in that dismal forest?

You'd be surprised, William, Hilda said as she walked to her crystal ball and cast the spell to talk to her bestest girlfriend. Baba Yaga did not respond. Well, so much for that. I guess she's not at home.

Probably got in a fight somewhere, William joked. As Ranee looked worried, he assured her that he was only making fun. You can make her angry with enough effort, but you don't get in a fight with Baba Yaga. You won't live long enough for that.

I see, although I am not sure if that is a good thing, Ranee carefully expressed her feelings. She was intrigued by the two cats that had jumped down from the book shelves and sat looking at her. They are beautiful cats. Obsi meowed his agreement with her words, before the magicals could destroy the moment. Where did you get them? Ranee then asked.

Hilda exchanged looks with her wizard. We're not certain. Most of the time it feels as if they got us. Then she recalled something. I noticed you did not have a broom with you.

Ranee nodded. I did not bring one. We agreed that flying a broom will attract the attention of other magicals, and the possibility of getting in a fight then is a lot greater, so we decided to walk and travel with small convoys. As if she guessed Hilda's next question, she added: It took me almost a month to come here.

Suck an elf. That's a long time. Your feet must hurt!

The white-haired witch grinned for a moment. I put some magic in my shoes to prevent that. But I am glad I have arrived, trust me. And I hope there is something you can do to help us, because we have tried everything we could think of, and nothing had any effect except for the worse.

Then you're either lacking imagination, or desperate, Hilda deducted. And considering the journey you made to get here, I'm guessing you are indeed desperate. But let me tell you, if we go to Glomorra with you, we're flying.

Oh joy, said the house with a gloomy intonation, startling the visitor from far away. So I am going to be chained up again?

2. Glomorra, here we come

Are you afraid your house runs off? Ranee looked at the massive amount of chains. She had slept on the couch and now was waiting for Hilda's last travel preparations. In her hand was one of the spare brooms that William had made a while ago.

No. I am afraid of people running in while I'm out, Hilda said as she checked her work. Well, this looks fine. Be good, house, we'll be back before you know it.

I take serious offence against that. You scale my mental capacities as well as my perception of time in the vicinity of rocks and insects. The house sounded very annoyed. And the rust stains will be your problem too.

Hilda popped up her wand and held it up. This is the way I deal with problems, house. And if you keep at it, your whining is promoted to a problem too, do I make myself clear?

Very clear, but you can't do that. I'm a magical house, the house replied.

I know, but still I wanted to make a point, the wicked witch said in a tone as if she had won anyway.

As usual, the house tried to have the last word.

Hilda turned around, pretending not to hear that, and got on her broom. She patted Grimalkin and then looked at William and Ranee. Are we ready? Ranee, let us know when we go too fast.

Ranee laughed as she brushed her many white braids over her shoulders. I'll let you know when you don't fly north.

The cats lay comfortably on the bristles of the brooms as the magical people kicked off and started their journey to Glomorra...

-=-=-

The first day of the journey went quickly and in good humour. Ranee told the magical couple about her life and her work in her Witcherette. The Witcherette turned out to be a combination of a beauty parlour for magical people of all kinds, as well as an area where magicals could practice newly acquired magical skills without hurting other people. Hilda thought it a strange combination, but if it helped Ranee in making a living, why not. I run the place with my friend Crystolyne and a few rock witches, Ranee explained.

Rock witches? William had never heard of that kind. Hilda's face betrayed that she hadn't either.

Yeah. They're not real proper witches, they try to dabble with some basic magic, but they're mostly harmless. They usually occupy themselves with laying out magical patterns of rocks and bits of wood. That's why we call them rock witches.

We have that kind too. We call them flower witches, Hilda nodded.

See, we don't have many flowers in Glomorra, Ranee said. Plenty of rocks around, so that's what they use.

As long as that keeps them out of harm's way, William shrugged, but his comment made Ranee laugh.

Yeah, sure. You'd be surprised what a little raw magic can do when there are rocks involved! Flowers are less lethal, William. It's good that rock witches are not susceptible to whatever strange rage is going round at home.

Hilda understood that. The thought of unguided magic from untrained witches who had no experience at all, amplified by whatever strange force, would be devastating to any region, even when there were only rocks.

After a night in a simple but nice little inn, they flew on. They travelled fast, so by the end of the second day they had almost reached the most southern reaches of Glomorra. The terrain they flew over was becoming mossy brown and rocky grey, and the air had acquired a definite chill which it liberally shared with the flying people. Grim and Obsi more than once looked accusingly at their magicals, seriously displeased with this treatment. Magic solved the situation, but for the cats the first negative point had already been scored.

How much further is it? asked Hilda as daylight was being forced into a retreat. The mountains were growing higher peaks here and the sun was sinking.

Half a day, at this speed, Ranee said, but this speed is not healthy at night, so we should find a cave to spend the night.

"Cave?" The magical couple spoke as one.

Yup. Cave. Caves are good for the night, you know. No problem with burning them down when you have an open fire. Ranee swooped downwards with the grace of a brick, and landed in front of a hole in the rocky wall. This looks like a nice, reliable and comfortable cave, don't you think? she asked as Hilda and William had arrived.

I'll agree that it is a cave, said William. Not sure about the slew of adjectives until we're all done and settled.

Eh? Ranee looked puzzled at Hilda.

Don't mind him. He sometimes does that, the witch said as she illuminated her wand. Let's have a look...

It did not take very long before a fire burnt in a fireplace, several blocks of wood had been converted to comfortable chairs, and food was handed around. Food that had come along in a shrunken fashion, in William's famous pockets. Ranee was impressed by that.

The cats lay curled up by the fire, after having feasted on a dinner of their liking, and life was good again. Until they all had gone to sleep.

Who left the water running? Hilda asked.

What?

I hear water running. Someone should go and turn it off. Now, before I get cranky.

Pissy, you mean, William chuckled.

Hush, wizard. Do something about the sound! Hilda sat up and lit her wand.

Be quiet for a moment so we can hear it as well, witch, William objected as he too ignited his wand, and Hilda was silent for a very short duration. Okay, yes, I hear it too. How can you have running water in a cave? Does our local cave woman know?

Ranee slowly stood up. I think it is very smart if we carefully go outside and find another cave... Something in her voice convinced Hilda and William that it was best to first do and ask questions afterwards.

Once outside, with protesting cats and blankets cooling down, Ranee explained that in places under the rocks there were underground rivers that cut out their path since ancient times. Sometimes the river has cut out a path so deep that a lot of water comes through. It hits the top of its stream and when its ceiling gets too thin you can hear the water rush by.

Hilda raised an eyebrow. So we were only a few inches away from a streaming river? Crappedy crap.

More likely less than half an inch, Ranee said, otherwise you can't hear the water. That of course explained her emphasis on leaving the cave carefully.

In the dark, by only the light of three wands, the group moved along the hard ground which possessed pointy bits, until they found a cave higher up. Hilda insisted on listening intently first, and only when she was certain there was no underground river to worry about, the magicals made a new fire and then went back to sleep.

-=-=-

In the morning the travellers faced a cold breakfast and a bleak landscape that did not improve over time, despite all the work the sun put into brightening things up.

Are you sure someone's meddling with the magical folk around here? The weather alone would be enough to make me argue with everyone in sight, Hilda explained her feeling to Ranee.

You do that in any kind of weather, witch, so get on that broom and let's leave, William commented on his witch's remark.

Hilda growled. Too bad I don't have an elf handy for you, wizard.

As sticking around and squabbling did not add anything, they lifted off and set course further north, with Ranee in the lead now. It was as she had said; only half a day further. Towards noon they arrived at a hamlet which was named Macpeth. William's laughter made the two witches frown and shrug. He was doing it again and he did not seem to care.

And this is where your whole population lives? Hilda asked.

She learnt that Macpeth was the largest village around, with about four hundred souls. "There are about six hundred more people,