Did I Really Sign Up For This

By Glain Roberts-McCabe

Here's a #leadershiptruth: sometimes being a leader can really suck. Helping people grow and seeing them develop is hugely rewarding. Being able to influence outcomes and 'be at the table' is positively awesome. And sure, titles and
salary bumps can be great but let's be real: it's not all sunshine and lollipops.
Laying off people you've worked with for years is painful. Having to fire someone –
even if they deserve it – is never fun. Dealing with difficult people, delivering tough feedback and 'looking in the mirror' when things go sideways is never high on the 'fun factor'. And let's not even get started with the politics!

Drawing on over 25 years experience of front-line leadership plus countless hours
coaching and working with leaders across levels and industries, Glain
Roberts-McCabe shares straight talk on her biggest lessons learned navigating the leadership trenches. From hunting for your next gig, to reigniting your passion, to dealing with a psycho boss and everything in between, no leadership opportunity or train wreck is left unturned.
So, if you've ever had days when you wondered 'did I REALLY sign up for this?!' this book is for you. Grab a latte (or a glass of wine...no judgment here) and find a dose of inspiration, motivation or kick in the ass when you need it.
Remember, the world REALLY needs more great leaders. The world REALLY needs YOU.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Tellwell Talent
• Release date: Apr 6, 2018
• ISBN: 9781773706757

Book preview

Welcome to the Jungle!

"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat."

- Theodore Roosevelt

I love this quote. It really nails what it means to be a leader. There are so many people who are quick to tell us, as leaders, what we’re doing wrong, how we’re screwing things up, how WE need to do and be better.

I always joke that my first leadership role was when I was just shy of my second birthday and the first of my three younger brothers arrived on the scene. They say that the oldest child is prone to leadership roles (aka being bossy) and, although I never really aspired to be the person in charge, I did always seem to find my way into leadership roles.

My first ‘real’ experience leading others was back in the early 1990s (a kinder, gentler time). I was tasked with leading teams of volunteers on various fundraising events. Managing people you don’t pay and who technically don’t really report to you is an excellent foundation for learning how to lead. Since that early experience, I’ve led teams in a variety of different profit and not-for-profit organizations. Along the way, I’ve thought several times to myself ‘Did I REALLY sign up for this?!’ I even actively stepped out of leadership roles twice, thinking that maybe I wasn’t cut out for them. But, like the proverbial moth to the flame, the desire to lead others and make a difference has always brought me back.

Learning to be a good leader, for me, is a lifelong journey that offers a variety of conflicting combinations: frustrating and fulfilling, terrifying and exhilarating, thankless and unbelievably rewarding. There are times when I feel like I’ve done things well and have really made an impact. There are other times (MANY other times) when I feel like I’ve really screwed things up.

That’s leadership.

That’s life.

This book is for all of you who are out in the arena of leadership, working hard each and every day, trying to get better. This book is for anyone who ever felt like they were totally derailing on some days and King/Queen of the Universe on others. This book is for leaders who genuinely want to make an impact but sometimes don’t know how to take the damn animation off their PowerPoint slides. It’s for those who are driving forward, surviving setbacks and are intent on thriving in our careers.

This is for those of you who are really, really trying to do what’s right for your teams, your companies and your families… but often put your own needs on a back burner along the way. This is for everyone who’s ever messed up and lived to tell the tale.

The chapters that you’ll find here have been curated from various RoundtableTalk blog posts written over the past decade. The ideas and lessons that I share come from years of observing, reflecting and analyzing leaders and their (and my own) leadership challenges.

This isn’t a book on ‘how to be a great leader’. I don’t believe in silver bullets. My aim here is to help you find sources of inspiration when you need them, tools and ideas that you can put into action immediately, and the occasional kick in the pants, as required.

In an effort to put ten years of random thoughts into a cohesive whole, I’ve organized the posts into broad themes that follow our leadership model here at The Roundtable. For us, great leaders need to strive to be better every day. This means:

Be Intentional

Lead With Purpose

Grow Your People

Deliver Results

Dive into the topics that catch your eye , or read the book cover to cover if you prefer.

Happy leading!

Be Intentional

(aka It All Starts with You, Baby)

Section 1

Get Ahead

I have this tape continuously playing in my head that tells me that I’m not good enough. Most of us have a version of this tape. Our tapes get embedded in our brains from an early age usually as a result of parenting, school teachers or other influencers. On this tape are some of the stories we tell ourselves about our abilities and potential that do nothing but limit us and, sometimes, they actually work to derail our efforts. I have a story that I tell myself: that I’m an emotional eater, and I overeat when I get stressed. It consistently derails my attempts to eat healthily. I also have another story that I tell myself: that I’m not a very patient person (because, after all, my dad wasn’t very patient). I often use this tape as an excuse when I’ve behaved in a way that I’m not particularly proud of. Getting rid of old tapes isn’t easy but, with practiced reflection, you can slowly start to identify patterns and create a new dialogue for yourself. Consistency and focus are key. I still don’t think I’m as patient as I could be, but I’m leaps and bounds better than I used to be.

Job Hunters: Build Your Resilience like an Entrepreneur

One of the hardest things about self-employment is dealing with the never-ending, ongoing rollercoaster of highs and lows that come with building a business. Being able to manage the ride is something that I’m perpetually working on. One of the things I’ve learned about entrepreneurship is that it’s exactly like job hunting. People ask me for tips to stay resilient as an entrepreneur, and I think the strategies I use are equally applicable for people who are job hunting.

I’ve had my own business now for just over ten years. From the outside, I get a lot of accolades for what I’ve achieved. What people don’t see is what happens behind the curtain. Here’s a taste:

My three biggest clients all imploded over the span of three months, right after I’d expanded the business.

My new hire quit after four months. Isaw it coming, but refused to pay attention to the signs.

Ispent last week drowning in parts of the business that don’t play to my strengths, making me wonder if getting asteady paycheque wouldn’t be easier.

My new client keeps moving back our project launch meetings, and money that Ithought Icould count on this month may not show up for another six months.

Get the picture?

So, how do I stay sane? Here are my tips:

Meditate. This has literally transformed my life. Instead of worrying about what might happen, I stay focused in the now and what is happening. Worrying – about money in particular – has a spectacular way of grinding your business (or job hunt) to a halt.

Be grateful. Man, what a privilege it is to live in Canada and do work like this. If I find myself throwing a pity party, I just think about people who would trade their challenges for mine in a nanosecond.

Energize yourself up. Smart people who love what they do give me energy. Learning gives me energy. Nature gives me energy. Speaking gives me energy. Knowing what gives you energy is key to building resilience.

Manage your week. Last week, for me, had way too many draining activities that involved accounting, taxes and administrative minutia. This week, I’ve got a better balance with client brainstorming, thinking time and public speaking. As much as possible, I try to balance my weeks with things that energize me vs. drain me. Know what gives you juice and try to build at least a few of those activities into your day to maintain your motivation.

Build your network. Entrepreneurs are generally pretty supportive. When I’m really feeling beaten up, I’ll call one of my entrepreneurial friends who will quickly remind me that I’ve lived through these highs and lows before and will make it through to the other side. Make sure you galvanize your support system.

Many people say to me: I could never do what you do. I fully disagree. Entrepreneurship isn’t easy, but neither is looking for a new job. If you’ve ever persisted in finding a new position after being unemployed, believe me, you’d probably survive just fine as an entrepreneur.

Remember, it’s all about building your resilience and playing the long game.

Net-leeching: How to Suck the Goodwill out of Your Network

At The Roundtable, we are flag-waving-champions of the importance of building and maintaining your personal and professional network. In work, your network will be one of the most crucial tools you’ll ever own. My friend Charles Brown, President of The Source, talks about the importance of having a small, tight network as a way to ensure job-option longevity. In my experience, meeting people and engaging them in your network is the easy part. The hard part is the maintenance. Recently, I was reminded of how NOT to maintain a network effectively and have coined a new phrase to describe it: net-leeching!

A few weeks ago, two of my clients and I received a ‘networking’ email from someone we all know peripherally who is currently looking for work. The response we all gave was pure annoyance. We essentially rolled our collective eyes and promptly deleted the request for support (admittedly after a slightly high school back and forth exchange behind the scenes about how annoying the request was in the first place). Why this harsh reaction, you ask? Well here’s the story: this person had literally bled their network goodwill dry through a series of consistent missteps.

Here’s how they went from a networker to a net-leecher and what you should avoid so that you don’t get labelled a goodwill blood sucker:

No value added… Every stay in touch email received from this individual contained updates on their career progress with no interesting information for the reader (other than hearing, once again, how fabulous this individual is).

No reciprocity… After the pitch (keep me in mind for new roles), the email ends with a bland would love to hear what’s new with you which then gets zero response when you do send a follow-up (obviously leading one to question the sincerity of the sender).

No WIIFY… Tim Cork, author of Tapping the Iceberg, uses the term net-giving to describe how effective networking is about give and take. The key to building strong networks is to focus on how you can help the other person (vs. what they should be doing for you). Needless to say, on top of not really caring how the recipient is doing, our net-leecher never bothers to ask what they could do to help either.

TMI… Not that kind of too much information, but hearing a regular annual or bi-annual update from someone who is gainfully employed asking to be kept in mind for other job opportunities actually has the opposite effect. Our network strength is based on the strength of our recommendations. Do you really want to recommend someone who always seems to have their eye out for another opportunity? Probably not.

By definition, a leech is someone who benefits from someone else’s information, but doesn’t offer anything in return. Don’t be a net-leech.