Without Family Ties

By Joseph West

Joseph West, born in Egypt, arrived in the USA—Los Angeles, to be precise—for a visit when he was just thirteen and determined never to go back. He lived with his sister and her husband as part of a triumvirate of secret-keepers. His sister never talked about her inability to sustain a pregnancy. His brother-in-law hid from his Muslim in-laws the fact that he was secretly Christian. And Joseph (then known as Sam) didn’t dare admit his sexual orientation till he was around twenty years old.
Without Family Ties traces Joseph’s emotional evolution and spiritual awakening through a series of relationships, business endeavors, and personal obstacles.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Joseph West
• Release date: Nov 22, 2017
• ISBN: 9781370299706

Joseph West

Welcome to my Bio, Born in North Africa just a few miles from the Egyptian Nile, I moved to Los Angeles at the age of 13 seeking a better education. After studying interior design at UCLA, I worked at an interior design firm where I learned what it takes to make a home look beautiful both inside and out. My next journey began in 1992 as a real estate consultant.During my 23 career journey as a real estate consultant, I realized that being a successful negotiator and strategist was not enough to satisfy my appetite for life, so I began my soul-searching process. I found out that doing business with the right consciousness along with respect for human dignity is the perfect recipe for success. Seven of those years I mastered the world of social media and won the 2012 blogger of the year award.In 2015 and in the spirit of “Change is the only thing that is constant” I decided to embark into the world of South Florida. I always knew that Living close to the beach will allow me to see the world from a different lens. With my spiritual practice and being a strategist for a few decades, I became :Real Estate Broker/ RecruiterCertified training coachBook Author in 2017Book author in 2018Social media and branding strategistIn 2017 I published my 1st book, an autobiography titled “ Without Family Ties “. It is an emotional and spiritual awakening through a series of relationships, business endeavors, and personal obstacles. Available on Amazon, Kindle, Barnes and Noble and iBooks.In 2018 I became a Real Estate Broker that does not sell real estate but focused on :Recruit the finest talentTeach /mentor Business Conscious PracticeManage and develop the talents from zeros to heroesBranding StrategistIn late 2018, I published my 2nd book ” Best Kept Secrets “. The book is about capturing the humanity of the people by telling my own stories in order to capture my own humanity. Available at Amazon, Kindle, and iBooks. The books are my own personal stories to connect with others in the most maximized way possible.I am poised to provide YOU with a new outlook on productivity, efficiency, and accountability. I love being of service and I look forward to doing better today than yesterday. Above all, I value human contact and always-developing close personal relationships.

Book preview

Introduction

It is accepted in the spiritual world that when a boy reaches the age of thirteen, he is capable of making decisions based on his free will. This raises the question: What does a thirteen-year-old know about free will? But there is an answer: His soul does. I moved at the age of thirteen, made a non calculated move of my own free will. Leaving my parents and siblings behind, I moved from not just one city, not just one country, but one continent to another—and have never looked back since.

There are ten players in this journey, and one traveler: me. I have traveled since birth, experiencing, with each of the players, the way each impacted my life in some form or another. I salute everyone of them, with gratitude.

If this book touches one member of the LGBTQ community with his/her coming-out process, impacts one young teen with his/her awkward family upbringing, or affects someone struggling with his/her soul-searching process, then my goal will have been accomplished. Enjoy, and thank you for reading my story.

Summer of 2007

Let me start my story in the middle. I was getting ready to go to Israel for the first time. The trip was with the kabbalah center from Los Angeles, California. It happened to be around what is known as the High Holy Days. I was so excited; I had always wanted to go to Israel. We were going on all the tours to the most ancient sites and places most tourist cannot get to, and I could hardly wait.

A month before the trip, an old friend of mine, Maria Cina, whom I had not seen for years, had insisted on stopping by on her way from downtown. She arrived soon in her husband, Blair’s, Porsche with no shoes on. She is gorgeous with or without shoes on.

She came in. We had a glass of wine and began to chat and catch up. She suddenly paused and asked, How’s your love life?

Okay, I guess.

I see him, she said.

Him who? I asked.

I’m not sure, but I see him. Have you made your list?

What list?

The list of everything you’re looking for in a man, partner, soulmate. I did one before I met Blair, and he’s everything I wrote on my list, with the exception of one thing: he smokes. I didn’t write ‘non-smoker,’ so be very specific with your list!

Okay…sounds good, I said.

Shortly after Maria left, I began to write my list. It was very specific and a page long.

A few of the bullet points on the list were:

He has a career and is successful

He has a sense of style and likes music

He is spiritual and not religious

He has a hairy chest

He is someone who wants to walk next to me and not behind me

He will support me in my growth process

On Labor Day of that summer, a week before I left for Israel, I had decided to go to Palm Springs for a quick weekend. It was, after all, the last holiday of the summer, and at the time I owned a condominium there, so why not? And off I went.

One night I was out with friends at a local bar—nothing out of the ordinary. Everyone was looking for a good time, and the town was full of tourists. As I was doing my rounds in the bar and being my normal social self, I noticed this good-looking guy sitting by the bar. He was very white, with very blond hair—very short blond hair…your typical American-looking guy, and handsome, may I add. He wasn’t dressed in the typical bar attire, which made him more interesting to me. He was well built and masculine enough to fit my mold, or to fit some of the items on my wish list. His name was James.

I am not the shy type, so naturally I introduced myself. He replied kindly, and his look implied interest in me. We began conversing, and I learned he was visiting from Seattle, Washington. Shortly after that I noticed he was drunk. I don’t like drunks. It’s a big turn-off for me. He didn’t have a car and was staying at a hotel.

To my surprise, I noticed a casual friend of mine also had an interest in James. At this point, all I wanted was to make sure James got to his hotel safely. I asked my friend, since he was interested in James, to give him a ride to his hotel, and off I went to enjoy the rest of my night.

The following day, my friends and I decided to go out for drinks in the afternoon. That’s all one really does in Palm Springs besides eat and sit by the pool during the day. As I was walking around, who did I see—and in a much more sober condition? Yes, James. I looked at him, and he looked at me. He said, Hi, Sam.

I was impressed that he remembered my name, especially after how drunk he had been the night before. I greeted him in return, mentioning how impressed I was by his remembering my name. We exchanged beers and began chatting, he introduced me to his friends from Seattle, and a good time was had by all.

It was time to go. I did what any normal gay person would do at the time: I invited James for a drink at my place. He accepted, and I drove us back to my condo. In the car, I played a CD: Amy Winehouse Rehab, one of my favorites, which turned out to be James’s favorite as well. He liked music, and what’s more he had almost the same taste I have. Another item from my wish list—yaaaay.

We got to my place and ended up talking for hours about life, my background, his background, our respective likes and dislikes. It turned out he had a gay brother who lived a mile away from me in Los Angeles. Aha—a good reason for James to come visit me in L.A. Things were shaping up, and eventually we slept together.

James was flying out to Seattle, and I was leaving for L.A. the following day. We said our goodbyes and exchanged phone numbers. I was back focusing on my trip to Israel, and all was good in the Sam West world.

Later, in October, I got a call from James, telling me he and his friends were coming to L.A. for Halloween. It turned out that it was his favorite holiday. He loved getting in costumes and dressing up. That was his childlike side, and it was fun to watch. I was happy about seeing him again and hoping to get together. So I asked him to let me know when he was in town so we could make plans.

Halloween evening was approaching, but no word from James. I knew he was in town because he’d texted me, telling me so. I had plans of my own to go to a very well-known club in downtown L.A. called the Mayan. You might remember it from the movie The Bodyguard , with Whitney Houston. I had friends visiting from Palm Springs, and off we went. Sure enough, who did I run into? James.

He paid very little attention to me, but I wasn’t about to let it ruin my night, so I moved on and made the best of it and enjoyed the company of my friends from Palm Springs.

The next day, James called me and wanted to know if he and his friends could stop by to soak in my hot tub. I had just had one installed. This should have been my first inclination that this was not for me. I simply replied, No. I am in for the night, but the next time you’re in L..A, maybe you can make some more time to see me. I can be harsh at times and have no problem saying what’s on my mind.

A few weeks later—now it was November—he called and suggested that perhaps I should visit him, since I’d never been to Seattle. He had a two-bedroom condo, and if things didn’t work out, I would have my own room. I was impressed with his directness and kindness. We agreed on a date in December: the weekend after Thanksgiving, which coincided with my birthday. The weekend before my birthday, I was still grounded and going with no expectations—just planning to have fun and to get to know this person and Seattle. He had just moved into his new condo, so I bought him a little housewarming present: a candle with the initial J on it. Simple but nice.

The city was cold, dark, and rainy. I wasn’t used to dark, cold, and rainy. I was an L.A. boy. But I kept my happy face on. We had great conversations, dined out, and James showed me the town and its landmarks. One time, while we were at a place that crafted handmade soap, he sneaked in and bought me one bar for my birthday. He