Unseen Academicals

By Stephen Briggs and Terry Pratchett

‘Two households, both alike in dignity, in fair Ankh-Morpork, where we lay our scene…’

Football divides the city. Each area has its own team – and rivalry means supporters never mix. Until a Dimwell fan falls for a Dolly Sisters girl.

And now an ancient bequest means the wizards of Unseen University must win a football match, without using magic.

Luckily they’re coached by the mysterious Mr Nutt (and no one knows anything much about Mr Nutt, not even Mr Nutt, which worries him, too).

As the match approaches, four lives are entangled and changed forever. Because the thing about football – the important thing about football – is that it is not just about football.

As all children know, the way you get into a fantasy world is by accident… You go into the wardrobe, looking for somewhere to hide and – bingo. And that’s how Stephen Briggs found Discworld.

In 1990, he wrote to ask Terry if he could stage Wyrd Sisters. That was the first time anyone, anywhere in the world, had dramatised Terry’s work. He had no idea it would go any further than one play (possibly two). But it did. So far, he has now adapted, staged and published twenty-two plays.

He and Terry also worked together to produce the original Discworld Maps and Diaries, Nanny Ogg's Cookbook, The Discworld Companion (now called Turtle RecallThe Wit & Wisdom of Discworld.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Oberon Books
• Release date: Feb 10, 2015
• ISBN: 9781783196937

Stephen Briggs

Stephen Briggs lives in Oxfordshire and has been involved in the world of amateur dramatics for many years. Oxford Studio Theatre Club staged his adaptations of Wyrd Sisters, Mort, Guards! Guards!, and many others. As well as compiling The Discworld Companion, The New Discworld Companion, and, now, Turtle Recall: The Discworld Companion . . . So Far, he has also co-authored the Discworld Diaries, the Mapps, and voices the UK and US Discworld audiobooks.

Reviews for Unseen Academicals

[snotbottom-1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Only my second Terry Pratchett book, but I think he's growing on me. His wit seems to lineup with mine pretty well.Yet, he doesn't just rely on his wit. this story would stand well on its own, and the humor only adds to it.

[pwaites_1 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Unseen Academicals is the thirty-seventh book in the Discworld series, and not one I’d recommend starting with. While Unseen Academicals does stand alone, it contains a plethora of references to other books in the series, possibly the most self referential of any Discworld novels. Thus, I would suggest starting with Guards! Guards!, The Wee Free Men, Monstrous Regiment, or Going Postal instead.On the surface, Unseen Academicals is about sports. Ponder Stibbons, the new Master of Tradition of the Unseen University, has discovered that over eighty percent of the university’s food budget is covered by a bequest that stipulates they put forth a football (or soccer, if you’re American) team at least once every twenty years. Time is run out, and for the sake of the cheese cart, the wizards must play football. What Unseen University is really about is community. Being in the midst of a community can be a wonderful thing as you can feel supported and like you belong. But being in a community can also hold you back when you worry about how others will perceive you. You end up placing limits on yourself about what is “sensible” and never think about what it is you actually want. And it’s so easy for a community to turn on someone they perceive as different.‘”First, never, ever apologize for anything that doesn’t need apologizing for,” said Glenda. “And especially never apologize for just being yourself.”‘Unseen Academicals of course includes the faculty of the Unseen University, who should now be familiar from countless other Discworld books from Moving Pictures on. However, the majority of Unseen Academicals is focused around four new characters who all work in the servants quarters of the university. Glenda and Juliet are both cooks in the Night Kitchen while Trev and Mister Nutt deal with the university’s endless demand for candles. Other reviews have pointed out that these characters fall into general types you see in other Discworld novels. While I think that’s true to a certain extent, I believe that all four are distinctive and that if they can be considered a “type” they are the best of that type Discworld has to offer.Glenda is a sensible young woman who compulsively sorts out other people’s problems. In the back of her mind, she remembers her mother, who was so consumed with hard work and other people’s affairs that she had no time left for herself. Mister Nutt is a highly intelligent and educated goblin who is obsessed with finding worth. Trev is the orphaned son of the football’s biggest legend. Juliet is beautiful and maybe not as stupid as she appears. It’s hinted that she could grow and do a lot more if Glenda let her make her own decisions. I love all four of them and their friendships with each other. Glenda Sugarbean is a particular favorite of mine, and I love her growth through the novel. It’s a pity you don’t see more about her in the fandom.“A lot hinges on the fact that, in most circumstances, people are not allowed to hit you with a mallet. They put up all kinds of visible and invisible signs that say ‘Do not do this’ in the hope that it’ll work, but if it doesn’t, then they shrug, because there is, really, no mallet at all.”The pacing is slower than many of the other Discworld novels. I also think the ending was weak, although that could because the climax was a football game and I have little interest in sports. I actually liked Unseen Academicals better than previously after this reread. There was a lot about it that I’d never noticed before.While Unseen Academicals is not the best Discworld novel, it’s far from the worst. I’d say it’s in the better half of the series. Still, given the number of reoccurring characters who make appearances and sly references to other novels, I wouldn’t recommend reading it without experience in Discworld. However, if you’re familiar with the series, I’d encourage you to pick up Unseen Academicals.Originally posted on The Illustrated Page.

[griffin22 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Football, wizards and fashion. And one orc. Good story, but the theme of another race going from discriminated against to accepted (dwarves, trolls, werewolves, vampires, golems, now orcs...) is getting a bit tired.

[jonsweitzerlamme · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Probably the weakest of the later Pratchett, but definitely worth a read.

[breic-1 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

It never builds much momentum. The main plot point, a soccer game between the wizards of Unseen University and an Ankh-Morpork United challenger team, doesn't have enough meat to sustain a book, so Pratchett adds a number of minor plot points that trail off. The writing is uneven, with the humor dropping off in the middle before coming back at the end. Not a particularly strong Discworld entry.

[ma_washigeri · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

Pretty poor - perhaps another half star. Football isn't my thing but the problem was that it didn't contribute to the discworld mythology or to insights into human nature, and wasn't very funny either. Better to re-read one of his better ones I think.

[kaitanya64 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

If you hate pro sports (and who doesn't ) you will love this book. You might even love it if you love sports. Rincewind makes a cameo appearance, but the main focus is on Glenda, the head cook in the unseen university's night kitchen,who is one of those people who keeps others safe and fed but who will certainly face challenges when her responsibilities include a crew of wizards trying to play semi pro "foot the ball" and an Orc who may be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

[kmajort · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Can't NOT like Terry P. but I could tell (tho Michael did say it out loud)
that this was dictated DiscWorld.... Missing the absolute polish/edit of his earlier stuff.
But who am I to complain? Go man go!

[gwernin · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Some good bits, some tedious bits, and a slightly limp ending. Still, the good bits were pretty good, and the tedious bits were not too long, and I didn't actually dislike the ending.

[paeonia_1 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Not Pratchett's best.

[mumfie_1 · Rating: 2 out of 5 stars]

It's not one of his best, starting off very slow, but still. Show good understanding of the value of a football crowd

[edwinkort · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

liked this book.

on to the next book in the serie

[chelseaknits-1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Not my favorite of the Discworld series; I suspect I'd have liked it better if I were more of a sports fan. I love how the female protagonist is fat but finds love anyway, and the presentation of a drag queen/gay man couple made me happy, as well.

[jbarringer-2 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

The wizards discover the joys of foot-the-ball, and become acquainted with an orc.

[scottcholstad · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

It pains me to give a Discworld novel a less than stellar rating, but I found this one lacking in some way. It started out promisingly -- the wizards at Unseen University find that in order to keep a sizable endowment, they must play a game of commoner "football," or as it is known, "foot the ball." They are aghast, but are more aghast at the thought of their losing any of their nine meals a day, so they begin to form a team led by Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully. Meanwhile, Lord Vetinari, the city's benevolent tyrant, has decided he wants to control this game, forming leagues and handing out gold looking trophies and he wants the wizards to lead the way. Promising start, yes?Unfortunately, it's all ruined by a Romeo and Juliet love story between Trev and Jewels, two new characters. We also meet Glenda, a forceful cook in charge of UU's Night Kitchen and Mister Nutt, a goblin (who later turns into an orc) who is adept at pretty much anything. Trev takes Nutt to his first football match, where the crowd does "the Shove," and where the wizards are in search of pie, and Nutt is really taken with it. So much so, that he grabs the ball and scores the game winning goal.Somehow it comes to the wizards' attention that Nutt has some skills, so they make him coach of the team. They ask Trev to join, as he's the son of a late, great football player, but Trev declines, saying something along the lines of "I promised me old mum" he'd never play. This is repeated so freakin' often, Pratchett pretty much beats the reader to death with it. It gets old very quickly. And of course, you know Trev ends up playing. Duh.So Jewels becomes a fashion model for dwarves and becomes quite famous and in demand. Glenda acts as her manager. Nutt seems to develop a thing for Glenda, which is odd because one traditionally doesn't think of "things" happening between goblins and humans. But Glenda feels her heartstrings being tugged at for the first time in her life and she loves it.I guess my main complaint is, the book really isn't so much about foot the ball as it is about Nutt and his relationships with others, such as Trev and Glenda. And while that's moderately interesting, the humor that could have been attached to a book devoted to a book of the wizards playing at foot the ball solely could have been pretty forceful. This, however, is rather mediocre. It's a romance, with football as its backdrop. I feel disappointed. I'd recommend it to Pratchett fans, but not to anyone else.

[xleptodactylous · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Quite possibly the best Pratchett novel thus far that I have read, if only because, despite my hatred of football, Ankh-Morporkian Wizards plus football equals something completely unmatched by any other humour writer I have encountered. You can have modern football with sci-fi as done by Rankin, or you can have modern football with modern settings ala everybody else, but modern football in Ankh-Morpork? Possibly the only way that football can be enjoyed anymore.
The humour was the fantastic Pratchett-style as usual as being grown-up yet at the same time really rude at times, which is beyond most people.

Possibly the most outstanding part of this novel for me was the character of Mister Nutt. Sublimely crafted by Pratchett, who has always managed to have sufficient characters that are 3D and not flat, shallow or passers-by. Mister Nutt is the epitome of everything wrong with humanity in the way he is treated, created et all, and he is also the epitome character that shows just how good Pratchett is at creating realistic characters, even if they are Goblins! (or any other number of mythical species, for that matter). Mister Nutt probably stands out as the most thoroughly thought through characters in the Discworld.

[jjvors_1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Once more Terry Pratchett examines aspects of our society through his fantasy series set in Disk World: a disk shaped world supported by four elephants standing atop a gigantic turtle swimming through outer space. Mr. Pratchett lampoons and examines football (soccer) and crowd psychology; the fashion world; and the value of cooks. He also parodies Romeo and Juliet while he's at it. This audio dramatization was well executed by the reader Stephen Briggs, who ably portrayed the dozens of characters and the multiple species of Disk world (human, dwarf, orc, troll, and vampire). You know the reader is good when you can tell which character is portrayed by the voice used.I highly recommend this audiobook, if you have a sense of humor.

[miaculpa-1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

I would say with confidence that I have read more of Terry Pratchett's oeuvre than of any other author, which is probably why I've grown to have mixed feelings on the Discworld. At his best, Pratchett can be very funny but I find that too often I wanted to skip ahead a page or so ahead to get to "the interesting bit" that was surely only a page or so away."Unseen Academicals" has a promising set-up; the start of an organised soccer competition in Ankh-Morpork, with our friend the Librarian as goalkeeper. And while there are a few laughs, it gets lost in what could be called a mawkish subplot.

[mrs_mcgreevy · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Pratchett turns his satirical eye on sports, managing to make pithy comments on the wisdom and folly of crowds, the beauty of standing up for yourself, politics, love, fashion, and not letting anyone else define who you are and what you can do.

[debs913 · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

I've never been a Terry Pratchett fan, but picked up this book because I liked the cover :)

Mr. Nutt is a wonderfully likeable fellow, with mysterious origins and a secret so secret, even he doesn't remember it. He strives in his job as a candle dribbler in halls of the Unseen University to prove his worth and "become". When the university and it's wizardly faculty are faced with the job of revising the city's violent version of football (soccer), Mr. Nutt takes the lead, developing the rules and training the team with the help of a Likely fellow, a cook, and a vacuous and lovely young women who takes up modeling wearing a beard.

Funny, well-written, great characters. Highly recommended.

[moriquen · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Another highly enjoyable Discworld novel by Pratchett. I loved Nutt as a new character and I hope to encounter him (and Glenda) again. I'd love to find out how he will get to grips with the task he was given.

[jerhogan · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

A laugh out loud satire on football, the fashion industry and Universities.

[dickmanikowski · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Not one of the best of Terry Pratchett's Discworld novels, but this novel presents some intriguing thoughts about what it means to be human. It also presents the unlikely juxtaposition of stuffy medieval wizards confronting thug-ridden English soccer. Perhaps the least impressive of the eight or nine Discworld novels I've read so far, read, it still rates a solid four stars. Best of all, Unseen University's librarian is the goalkeeper who saves the game.

[dlmorrese · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

Reread this for only the second time since it was fist published. It's even better than I recalled. I have to admit that I found the idea of the wizards of UU being good at any sport (other than, perhaps, competitive eating) to be something of a stretch, but the story, the characters, and, of course, Pratchett's wit and talent for word play make this a very enjoyable reading experience.

[wealhtheowwylfing · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

Fine, but no where near as good as Pratchett usually is. Some plot points never went anywhere, the wizards were far more powerful than usual, Vetinari spent a rather prodigious amount of time talking out loud, and the new characters all felt like retreads of old one. Still, quite funny and with a good heart to it.

[chris_el-1 · Rating: 3 out of 5 stars]

You know that sardonic twinkling eyed attitude sometimes you see when speaking or being spoken to tongue in cheek? This whole book is imbued with that spirit. It's lovely.

It has it's philosophical points. But the story drives the action and it never gets to heavy handed. A fun though not terribly serious read.

[jvstin_1 · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

NB: I received a review copy of this book.Football (Soccer to us Americans). Romeo and Juliet (with a dash of Cyrano de Bergerac). Secret pasts of characters. Cooking.Such is the Matter of Unseen Academicals, the latest Discworld novel from Terry Pratchett. Centering on Unseen University, Pratchett takes us not only into the doings of the wizards there, but the "little people" who make the University work. We meet Glenda, head of the Night Kitchen and possibly one of the best cooks anywhere. We meet Trev Lively, son of the famous football player Dave Lively (who scored an unprecedented four goals in his career in the old and illegal version of football played on Discworld's streets). We meet Juliet, a fashion star waiting to be born from her humble beginnings in the kitchen. And we meet the mysterious Mr. Nutt, who is from Uberwald. He's a candle dribbler, but also amazingly educated for someone of his station. Oh, and he is a monster of unusual stripe...How is it? Well, while I was entertained, UA is frankly, not as good as some of Pratchett's best novels. There are a few things here which are not as well integrated as other plotlines in the novel. Stuff that felt like they should be more important, or were going to be, but never quite came to fruition. I was expecting more out of them than we actually got. Its possible, due to my scattershot reading of Pratchett's work that there are some characterization issues that I am missing. Lord Vetinari feels different than he does in the novels I have read, for example.On the other hand, a very good Pratchett as opposed to a first-rank Pratchett is still better than a lot of the dreck out there. And there are wonderful things in the novel that frankly made me laugh aloud while reading it. The footnote about the Explorer's Guild, for example. Or the offhand mentioned consequence of yet another strange addition to the Watch. The character growth of Ponder Stibbons, who is rapidly becoming a force within the University to rival Ridcully himself. Or the climatic game for that matter. (although there is an incident in the game involving how the Librarian is removed from goalkeeper that felt very wrong).I have a large gap in unread Pratchett novels that was little handicap in reading this novel, and so I can unreservedly recommend this latest Discworld novel to readers of all levels of familiarity with Pratchett's work. Is it up to his highest standards? No. On the other hand, only very good Pratchett is still much better than much of the competition.

[sonicquack · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

Pratchett's fans require a high standard and Unseen Academicals is, by literary standards, a great book. Academicals includes interesting and fresh characters, recurring characters to keep the regulars happy and a clever, interesting and wry storyline. It's also very British. As a Discworld novel it lacks a certain Pratchett magic - too frequently the storyline is misplaced, buried as Pratchett muses about some subject or other. In a smaller book, with a single plot such padding would be fine, however Academicals is a hefty tome, with several plots weaving their way around each other. That aside, there are still enough moments that will make you think/smile/appreciate life that are expected from Practhett and ultimately Unseen Academicals is a solid entry in to the Discworld saga.

[ironicqueery · Rating: 4 out of 5 stars]

It's hard to be overly critical of any Terry Pratchett novel. His Discworld books are fabulous, mixing humor and satire beautifully. Unfortunately, the long wait for Unseen Academicals didn't produce the fabulous story I had been hoping for. It's not that the story is bad, but the humor is on the light side. Several new characters are introduced in the story, which seems to put the focus on developing the characters rather than using familiar favorites to engage in witty banter and biting satire. The new characters are treated kindly and the story becomes more a lesson in accepting others despite differences than anything ironic. Which is fine and good, but when I read Pratchett, I want text that makes me laugh out loud. There was none of that here. As mentioned though, any Terry Pratchett makes for a great book, so it's hard to be too critical. It's still an excellent story, just not up to par. According to his web site, it sounds like another Tiffany Aching novel is up next, so I'm hoping all the humor will be packed into that.

[loftyislanders · Rating: 5 out of 5 stars]

'Unseen Academicals' is both funny and deep. It explores issues including prejudice, heritage, sporting events, and romance with a fresh outlook and a good sense of humor. It'll make you laugh. It'll make you cry. It might make you start chanting cheers for your favorite team. I HIGHLY recommend it to anyone who enjoys fantasy, science fiction, or comedy in their literature.