The Legendary Mad Matilda

By Shawn James

"Mad" Matilda Crowley has become an urban legend in the 1990’s New York City Goth scene. Known for her outrageous underground parties where anything can happen, Matilda gets caught up in her own raving insanity when she’s arrested at one of her own parties in a police raid.

After she’s released from jail, Matilda learns it’ll take legendary discipline, courage, and character to her rebuild her life. Can a lady get back up? Or has she taken her last dive off the stage of life?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Shawn James
• Release date: Oct 31, 2017
• ISBN: 9781370114443

Shawn James

Shawn James is the author of over seventy Books. A graduate of Monroe College he's been writing fiction and nonfiction for twenty years.

Book preview

CHAPTER 1

February 1995

Is this what I want to do with the rest of my life?

I ponder the answer to that question as I stare at my reflection in the grimy bathroom mirror of the abandoned warehouse where we’re having tonight’s rave. While I’ve been having fun putting these kinds of parties together over the last five years, I have to wonder if I really want to make a career out of this.

I’m one semester away from graduating from Columbia University, one of the best schools in the country. But I doubt their alumni association will be pleased to hear that Matilda Kelley Crowley is actually Mad Matilda, Queen of the Industrial Goth Raves. With a 3.88 GPA and series of glowing of letters of recommendations from internships at Fortune 500 companies, I could work anywhere I wanted. But I don’t know if I’d really want to be a part of Corporate America. Over the last couple of years I’ve found my place in the Goth subculture and found my groove as an Industrial Rave promoter. Here, I’m a Black Widow loved by everyone. There I’d probably be a Tragic Mulatto who’d be reviled every day she came in to punch a clock.

There’s a rapp on the bathroom door of my makeshift dressing room as I imagine myself on the stages of Goth clubs all across the country. When I hurry over and crack it open, I catch the eager smile of best friend Lady Diabolique. The slender spike-haired chalk colored woman wearing dark makeup, a black velvet skater dress, silver jewelry, and black 20-hole Doc Martens smiles as she gives me a once-over. Hey Mattie, looking good. She tells me.

I smile looking down at the black cropped T-shirt, pleated mini kilt, spiked bracelets, and studded platform boots I’m wearing. Thanks Olivia. I reply. I didn’t think I looked vampy enough for VampJam.

You think the six-inch platform boots are bit much? Olivia asks looking down at my feet.

I would have worn the four-inch ones, but the sole of my Demonias separated at the heel this afternoon. Just like my pigtails, they’re a part of my trademark.

That’s why Renaldo and Darius came all the way from NoHo to see you tonight.

I gasp when I hear who’s in the crowd. Renaldo and Darius run The Hallows, one of the biggest Goth Clubs in Manhattan. They’re here?

Yeah. They wanted to see The Legendary Mad Matilda do one of her world famous stage dives for themselves.

Man, this could totally be my big break into legit clubs. I didn’t think news of my exploits traveled that far into the club scene.

With all the celebrities who’ve popped up at your shows the word is getting out about Mad Matilda. Lady Diabolique continues. You could be on your way after tonight.

If things work out tonight I could go from working in abandoned warehouses to setting up events in actual clubs. What’s the crowd like?

Hot. The DJ Nekrotech has them warmed up for your entrance.

My eyes grow wide when I hear who’s mixing the tracks for tonight’s show. DJ Nekrotech? What happened to DJ Flash?

Flash said he got another gig last minute. So I had to call in Amy.

After taking my deposit. And because this show isn’t being done in a legal venue I can’t take him to court. Shit, two hundred dollars in the hole and we haven’t even split the gate yet. If only people knew what I had to go through to put these shows together. I sigh.

They’d appreciate them even more. You ready to wake the dead?

As ready as I’ll ever be.

Then let’s get this party started.

CHAPTER 2

One down. One on the way. And one to go.

While Channel 7’s late movie plays on the TV across from the bed, I flip through the photos in the family albums of Jason, the kids, and me. We’ve come a long way over the last twenty years. Brody’s finished school, got married, and is now working at Universal Movie Studios. And Shelley will be finished with her first year at UC Berkley in a couple of months. And once Mattie graduates from Columbia in May, I can finally put in my papers and get ready to start my retirement.

I look over at the vacation brochures on the night table and imagine myself on a sandy beach this June when the bathroom door creaks open. I smile when I see my sexy husband Jason sauntering into the bedroom. The handsome middle-aged salt and pepper haired blue-eyed man is ready for a night of romance dressed in his silk pajamas. Hey Muriel, going through the family albums again? He asks falling into to bed beside me.

Yeah. I reply. I can’t believe we actually have the house all to ourselves.

First time in over twenty years.

Yeah, they do grow up so fast. Jason says looking through the family photos. Feels like almost yesterday all our kids scampering up and down the stairs playing.

And now Brody’s gonna be opening up his own KFC in a couple of months.

Jason raises an eyebrow on hearing about Brody’s new business venture. What? Working in the movies isn’t enough for him?

Brody says having some extra investments like franchise restaurants help build wealth for the future. From what he tells me, he and Dashawn are gonna hire some people to run the restaurant while they do their jobs.

So he’s looking to make some money on the side.

He calls it a long-term investment.

I guess you would need to invest in something after that last recession. Jason continues. The days of working until you retire at one company are over.

Maybe Mattie will find some ways to make money for herself in a couple of years. I say. And maybe she’ll finally put that Goth thing to rest.

Rest? Jason laughs. I doubt she’s even getting started.

After five years of dressing like a corpse I’d like to think she’d be thinking about getting her life together.

I thought you were all for Mattie being a Goth-

I didn’t mind Mattie being The Black Widow. But ever since she’s become Mad Matilda she’s gone completely insane. When I saw her come home on Christmas Eve with her hair teased out in pigtails, wearing a spiked collar and platform boots I wondered what happened to our Little Lady. You can’t go to work like that.

Somehow, the people at her internships don’t mind. She says some of them say she’s such a good intern they actually want to hire her when she graduates.

She keeps up with that Goth stuff she’s gonna wind up living on somebody’s sofa. They’re just saying that.

What do you mean?

Better let him know how people in HR like myself would see her at a real interview. Interns don’t get paid. And they don’t see clients. And I know her bosses ain’t gonna feel the same way with her on their payroll looking like Frankenstein’s daughter.

Who knows? She might become an executive someday.

All I know is when it was time for me to get serious about work back in 1969 I had to break out a straightening comb.

And you ain’t been the same since you ironed out your Afro. Jason jabs.

Damn, I loved that hairstyle. You loved my press and curl when you first saw it. I retort.

Still do. Jason says giving me a kiss. I think Mattie will get it together when she finishes school.

He has a lot more faith in her than I do. With the way she loves being a Goth I think she’ll be kicking and screaming when it’s time to take out those piercings and take down the pigtails and get serious about work.

So you think it’s gonna be like mother, like daughter? Jason jabs.

Remembering the tantrums I threw with Momma when I started dating Jason I hope karma doesn’t come back to kick me in the ass. Lord, I hope not.

CHAPTER 3

I follow Lady Diabolique out of the bathroom taking deep breaths to calm the anxieties welling up inside me. Every time I start a show I get nervous just like I did at my first rave back in 1990. Back then I was just trying to wake a dead crowd to save my friends’ gate. Now I’m worried if this show doesn’t go right there won’t be a career for Mad Matilda in the club scene.

Just as I’m working out my pre-show jitters, my boyfriend Justin rushes up to me. The tall muscular bronze colored man dressed in a black rayon dress shirt, baggy black slacks, and black dress shoes has a worried look on his face as he approaches me. Mattie, can I get a minute? He asks.

I thought he was going to meet me on the dance floor later. Dude, I’m about to start a show. Can’t it wait until I finish the intro?

Justin sucks his teeth. You always telling me to wait for you-

I know how he feels. I’d love to spend more time with him. But I don’t get stuff together now it won’t get together at all. I know. But can we talk about it later?

Justin huffs a sigh. You always say that. Then some crazy shit happens and I never see you for the rest of the night-

Justin, I can’t help that. Things just happen-

You make everything happen for everyone else but me-

Justin, I want to make time for you. But I’ve got work and school-

I’ve got school too. But I’m here instead of studying-

With a five-course load at NYU I know the sacrifice he’s making for me by coming out here tonight. I know. It’s just there’s a lot of stuff that goes into these shows. And I have to be on top of them so things go right with them.

What about making things go right with us?

Just let me get through the intro and I’ll be able to give you a dance.

Justin huffs a sigh on hearing what I offer him. Dance? I’m your man. I deserve more than that-

He does. You might get something else if you’re nice to me. I say flashing him a playful smile.

Justin’s frown changes into a smile on hearing my plans for us later. See you after the intro?

Right after.

A spontaneous kiss to Justin’s lips has him anticipating our meeting on the dance floor later this evening as I rush down the hall. I know I’ve been burning both ends of the candle these days, but I believe that there’s a payoff coming for all my hard work. I just have to keep working towards it.

CHAPTER 4

While Mattie heads off to the stage to start her show, I head back down to the bar to get myself a drink. I’ll wait for her tonight. But I’m getting real tired of waiting. And I’m getting tired of sharing my girlfriend with Mad Matilda.

I’ve spent the last three years at these raves and these clubs holding purses, watching coats, or standing on a damn wall while the Queen of the Industrial Goth Raves has been the life of the party. When I got with Mattie I thought I’d have a girlfriend who’d eventually stand with me on my wedding day. But all she does when we go out is stand me up in a corner while she goes to live her life with her Goth friends.

If things don’t get right between us, one of us is gonna have to leave this relationship. And I’m starting to look at the door.

CHAPTER 5

The beats of the EBM song that heralds my entrance gets louder as I make my way down the hall to the main floor of the warehouse. As I get closer to the loading area turned stage, I feel the energy of the crowd. When I pass by the DJ table, all the kids on the makeshift dance floor fall out of DJ Nekrotech’s mellow groove and into my vibe. Flashbulbs explode from cameras in the cheering crowd as I grab my mic off the stand and look out to the audience of black clad teenagers. MAD MATILDA’S IN THE HOUSE! WHERE MY VAMPIRES AT! I call out to the crowd.

The hot crowd starts to spark on my call. I hear whoops and hollers on my intro. DJ NEKROTECH IS READY TO MAKE IT LIVE FOR YOU UNDEAD! AND THEN THE CONDEMNED ARE GONNA ROCK THE HOUSE! ARE YOU VAMPIRES READY TO JAM?

The crowd lets me know how ready they are by screaming even louder. YEAH!

I CAN’T HEAR YOU! ARE YOU READY TO JAM?

YEAH! The crowd shouts even louder.

ARE YOU READY TO GO CRAZY?

HELL YEAH!

ARE YOU READY TO GO MAD?

HELL YEAH!

I’M READY TO GO MAD! LET’S GET THIS PARTY STAAAARRRRTTTTEEEED!

The crowd explodes with a roar when I drop the mic to the concrete floor. As its echo reverberates throughout the warehouse, I start rushing back for my trademark stage jump. While laser lights flash above the ceiling and industrial beats start playing, I look out to the crowd below and start running at full speed. When I take that leap off the stage I feel myself floating in the air for a moment. In that split second I see the hands of hundreds of Goths and Rivetheads reaching for me. I look down at them and feel safe in their arms as they catch me.

I feel the energy of the crowd as I’m carried by a wave of hands all the way to the other side of the warehouse. After I land on my feet, Goths and Rivetheads start dancing to the first song of the night. I’m about to go looking for Justin when I’m greeted by a round of applause from some of the patrons who didn’t participate in the wave. When I turn around and see Lady Diabolique and two men dressed in tailored suits standing in front of me I smile. Those must be the club owners she was telling me about. Wow, what an entrance. One of the men says.

Thanks. I say smiling back at them.

Lady Diabolique gestures towards the men as she introduces them. Mattie I want you to meet Renaldo Gonzales and Darius Jones, owners of The Hallows.

I light up on seeing the owners of one of New York’s biggest Goth club face-to face. Nice to meet you. I say extending my hand.

I’d have to say the pleasure is mine. Renaldo says shaking it. People told me I’d need to see the legendary Mad Matilda in action. And you are something else.

No wonder they call you the Downtown Julie Brown of the scene. Darius says. You really get a crowd going.

It’s the only way we can make money on these shows. I reply. The more word spreads about my parties, the more people want to come to see them.

Have to say it’s a full house. Renaldo continues. We usually don’t pack em’ in like this on a weekend downtown.

That’s because you have to follow fire codes. I retort.

The men laugh as Darius takes a business card out of his blazer. I’d like to see what you could do at one of our events. Give me a call next week.

I’ll definitely do that.

CHAPTER 6

As Lady Diabolique leads Darius and Renaldo over to the makeshift bar, I start to get ecstatic. This is it! My big break! I’m gonna be doing a show at the biggest Goth club in New York City!

I can’t wait to tell Justin the good news. I spot my boyfriend on the far side of the warehouse with a Coke can in his hand. When he meets my eyes he smiles in anticipation of our moment together. As The Cure’s Love Song begins playing on the speakers, I start sauntering through the crowd in his direction. Before I can get two feet, I’m stopped dead in my tracks by Ebony Darkness. The slender peanut butter colored woman wearing dark makeup, black jeans, a band shirt, and Doc Marten boots has a worried look on her face as she rushes over to me. Mattie, we got a situation. She tells me.

What’s going on Ebony?

Something happened to a kid in one of the bathrooms.

As I turn around to deal with the situation on the floor, I watch Justin’s smile twist into a frown. I’ll make it up to you Boyfriend. Sometime tonight.

CHAPTER 7

I suck my teeth watching Mattie rush off with Brenda to another part of the warehouse. I should have known she wouldn’t be able to keep her promise. Just like clockwork some crazy shit comes up that only Mad Matilda can deal with. Sometimes I think she likes putting those pigtails up so she can be the superhero to the Goth scene.

I should just raise up and be out. But I just want to hear what crazy excuse she comes up with this time. I swear, Mattie’s excuses are almost as ridiculous as the ones Matt Murdock uses when he checks out of his law office to take on the bad guys in that Daredevil comic she likes to read. I wonder what Goth crisis she had to deal with this time? The bar running out of Orange Slice? A scratched Cure record? Or are the blacks on a band members’ outfit not matching?

If she put half the effort into our relationship that she puts into dealing with this rave shit we’d be a lot closer than we are right now. But she’d rather commit more to the Goth scene than to me. I’ll give a break this time. But I’m really getting tired of having a full time relationship with a part-time girlfriend.

CHAPTER 8

My heart pounds in my chest as Ebony Darkness leads me through the crowds and down the hall over to some more bathrooms on the far side of the warehouse. I’m hoping what she has to show me isn’t bad enough to make me end the show early.

I push past the creaky door of the abandoned men’s room praying not to see something truly macabre. My heart stops when I see a babybat, barely fourteen years old dressed in mismatched thrift store clothes, bad eyeliner, and teased out hair slumped on the floor under the bathroom sink. Oh my God! I gasp rushing over to her.

I look into the girl’s glazed over eyes and quickly recognize the drug she’s on. Ecstasy. Are you all right?

You’re Mad Matilda! She babbles. Man, I can’t believe I’m actually talking to Mad Matilda!

This isn’t the way I wanted to be recognized by a fan. Yeah, are you okay sweetie?

I’m okay. See-

The girl tries to get to her feet and stumbles back down to the floor. Shit, she’s high out of her mind. What happened?

The girl manages to get enough of her faculties together to tell me her story. "I was feeling nervous. And a