The Darkest Hour Is Just Before Dawn

By Lynne Huysamen

The Darkest Hour is Just Before Dawn shares real life addiction stories written by Lynne Huysamen, a drug addict and an alcoholic that spent 15 years stuck in the cycle of addiction. These addiction stories are real and raw, sharing the thoughts and feelings of Lynne while bringing across how powerless she was over her addiction. It goes into some of the damages caused by her addiction and the danger she put herself and others in.
While in active addiction the addicts greatest challenge is breaking through the denial of addiction, even when not being able to recognize the addict’s powerlessness and damages caused.This book shares some of Lynne’s worst cases of powerlessness and damages. It shows how addicts are clearly insane while in the drips of addiction.
Lynne is now clean and working a program of recovery, sharing her experiences in active addiction and her path to recovery.
Hopefully this book will help other addicts to break through their denial and also help the families and loved ones of addicts get some understanding when they take a glimpse into this dark world of addiction.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lynne Huysamen
• Release date: Nov 10, 2016
• ISBN: 9781370704453

Lynne Huysamen

I am a 42 year old married mom of two, living in South Africa. I am a mommy blogger and online marketer.I am an addict and an alcoholic, 8 years clean and in recovery. I love sharing my story to help others.

Book preview

The Darkest Hour is just Before Dawn

Lynne Huysamen

The Darkest Hour is Just Before Dawn

Published by Lynne Huysamen at Smashwords

Copyright 2016 Lynne Huysamen

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return it to your favorite ebook retailer and purchase your own copy.

Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Prologue

I have wanted to share the story of my life for a while now, but holding me back has been the realization that this is not just my story, it is the story of other people too. Family, friends, colleagues and people I have met along the way.

For this reason I have chosen not to share some experiences, nor to be too specific with people or places. I want to only share my personal experiences, thoughts and feelings.

If you are an addict I hope you will be able to relate to some of my experiences, if you can find lightness and recovery it will make sharing my story worth it. This is my goal and dream, to help other addicts find recovery and happiness.

If you consider yourself a lost cause and beyond help, join the club. That was me in 2008. An addict swept up in the vicious cycle of addiction, deep in denial and full of anger and resentment.

Miracles worked in my life, today I am clean. True happiness has found its way into my life and I want to share my story with others. I want to inspire hope and strength in as many addicts as possible.

Recommendations

How high can ratings go? That's exactly what I rate this .... AT THE TOP! My own experiences flew through my mind while reading this very personal glimpse into your own 'hell'....Even if a person is not an alcoholic or addict....your book gives an exceptional view of what 'reality' becomes for way too many. You have risen from depths that are hard to describe to another person, yet your book explains it all.... I especially loved how you reach out to others; your book will touch many. Your online efforts are already making a difference in so many lives that I cannot see anything but tremendous success for this unforgettable book. Thank you! Bless you!

AM Rosie

This is a gritty real-life view on the paradoxical internal logic of addiction through the experiences of someone who spent years of her life in darkness but ultimately recovered. A brave and generous gift of unflinching honesty, softened by a good dose of humor and a happy ending. I highly recommend this book for anyone wanting to better understand addiction.

J Hastings

Hi Lynne thank you for having the courage to share your experience and shine some light into the dark corners of addiction. A devastating disease for all it touches. You weave a compelling narrative and have a way with words that leaves me looking forward to future instalments. A must read!

N Podmore

Table of Contents

Prologue

Recommendations

Chapter One – How it all Began

Chapter Two – Welcome to my World

Chapter Three – Swat Team

Chapter Four – Crooked Cops

Chapter Five – Your Dog is Melting

Chapter Six – Nose Dive

Chapter Seven – Warped Reality

Chapter Eight – Christmas Arrest

Chapter Nine – Chicken

Chapter Ten – Leech

Chapter Eleven – Window Shopping

Chapter Twelve – Sunday Visitors

Chapter Thirteen – Witches Broom Stick

Chapter Fourteen – Perhaps your Drink too much

Chapter Fifteen – Paranoia

Chapter Sixteen – Stopayne

Chapter Seventeen – Fast Forward to Today

Epilogue

Acknowledgements

About the Author

Coming Out Next

Chapter One

How It All Began

When I started writing this book someone I greatly respect said that he would love to know where it all started.

What triggered my addiction off? He said there had to have been a traumatic event. Yes, he is right. There were actually a series of events in my teen years that triggered off my addiction.

I have covered this all on my website where I blog about addiction and recovery. I also did a Youtube video.

I don’t want to fill this eBook writing that same story that you can go and read on my website. So if you are interested then please go and visit my website for details.

To sum it up simply when I was fourteen years old I was struggling with a few things. Of course all the typical teenage hormones and difficulties that come at that age.

In addition, I had to deal with cruel, humiliating and untrue rumours at school about me, and with my parents hearing about these awful things.

I was then raped, losing my virginity.

A few months later I was raped again.

After the second rape everything went pear shaped. I started off with cutting myself.

Then I started drinking. I also started acting out in various inappropriate ways.

Is this the reason I became an addict?

No I don’t believe so and when you read my eBook the reason will probably become clear to you.

It did spark things off but I don’t believe it was the cause.

Another theme which is very common in addiction and alcoholism is unhealthy and abusive relationships and I followed the typical pattern.

Drugs followed shortly after and when this happened my life spun even more out of control. I had debt problems, run ins with the law, and many more unpleasant experiences.

One of the biggest challenges an addict faces is denial.

No-one can get clean when they don’t believe they have a problem and they don’t need help.

In treatment for addiction one of the big focuses is what they call powerlessness and damages.

It is what helps an addict to see that they have a problem.

This eBook is not intended to be a collection of war stories. It is actually a collection of some of my worst cases of powerlessness and damages.

If you are not an addict or an alcoholic know that I have written this book with as much honesty as I can and I have tried to convey exactly how I was feeling at the time.

So let’s play a game while you read my book, ok?

Pretend you are in a fantasy world where any craziness is possible, even