These Wings Can Fly: Discover the Power of Your Mind

By Vivienne Duke

With its fresh approach to self-development this book has had a profound effect on all those that have read it. A true, yet extraordinary, story of a professional business woman coping with bereavement; a toxic person in her life that she felt tied to and financial challenges and her discovery of the amazing power within every one of us. A unique story with two voices and two perspectives which explores the convergence between science and spiritual. Much of this book is written 'live' so the reader gets to feel the raw intensity of these challenges at the actual time of writing. A story of humility, honesty and raw emotion which will help readers develop their own 'design for life' and inner peace. (10% of all royalties will be donated to the People Help People Foundation.)

• Language: English
• Publisher: Vivienne Duke
• Release date: Jul 10, 2014
• ISBN: 9781310880292

Vivienne Duke

I am the author of These Wings Can Fly - Discover the Power of Your MindI am a professional business woman and live in Leeds, England with my husband (Jon) and children (Ben and Livia).Up until recently I led a pretty ordinary life, until one day, at a time of great personal challenge and stress I had an extraordinary and profound spiritual experience.These Wings Can Fly is the story of how I harnessed that experience to help me get through some of the most challenging times of my life and the amazing things that happened on my journey of discovering the awesome power in each and every one of us.Jon travelled this journey with me and co-writes in the book with his Yorkshire man's 'grounded' view.My aim is to be a little thought provoking in my words and inspire people through sharing some of our learnings. My dream is to give others the strength and courage to see that we are never alone and we can meet life's challenges, head on, when we really put our mind to it.

Book preview

"There are only two ways to live life

One is as though nothing is a miracle

The other is as though everything is"

ALBERT EINSTEIN

This is the story of two ordinary people who travelled quite an unexpected and extraordinary journey together. Whilst they each took different paths, they both made the same discoveries and together, they began to understand the amazing power that rests within every one of us.

During this journey, travelled by me and my husband, this power was awakened and I would like to share our story with you in the hope that it will have the same amazing impact on your life that it did on ours.

I have learned so much over the last few months that has helped me through probably the most challenging time of my life and I want to share this with you because I know today’s world is a pretty tough place to live for most of us. In the face of adversity, where I honestly could have crumbled (and I have had so many people saying, I don’t know how you are dealing with this. that I almost started believing them!!!) I have come out the other side having grown as an individual with a newfound courage and self- esteem that I thought had been permanently bashed out of me. I am often heard to say, ‘What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger." and this is so true. I also have an absolute clarity on my future and an excitement that I know who I really am and what my life purpose is - which is going to make me incredibly fulfilled and happy from hereon in (and already is!).

My aim with this book is to condense some of the key things I have learned during some quite amazing experiences and avid self-study over the last two years and try to make it accessible to everyone. There are so many books out there about self-help and don’t get me wrong, they are brilliant and have certainly helped me enormously, but sometimes I think it is good to hear it in the story of an ordinary person that you can relate to and see some parallels with your own life.

I have not become a millionaire because of my discoveries, but I have certainly become richer and abundant in terms of my health; my self-esteem; my happiness; my hope and my courage to deal with challenging people and situations. I have also attracted a load of wonderful people into my life and existing friendships and relationships have gone up another level massively. People have come back into my life that were only mere acquaintances a year ago and we have developed incredibly strong bonds as they have joined me on my journey. I have never felt so supported, loved and fulfilled in my life.

This foreword is really quite important because it sets the scene for the rest of the book and also for some massive shifts that I believe are going on in this world today.

At the moment – these shifts are all still a little bit ‘behind closed doors’ and yet they are definitely going on because I have seen it for myself over the last two years and it has been pretty profound. It is actually blurring the boundaries between what is regarded as ordinary and what is regarded as extraordinary and I find myself now talking almost a different language. Words that a while ago I would have thought were the ramblings of someone who was slightly ‘loopy’, yet I now find that perfectly sane people are responding to me in the same language!

Without fail – whenever I have told anybody about my experiences – it has been like a light has switched on for them. Believe me – it has taken a bit of courage to tell people my story because it isn’t your ordinary everyday situation, but I was strongly compelled to take this risk (in fact it felt like I would be failing if I didn’t do it!) and not once has anyone ridiculed me. In fact – quite the opposite – it has enabled them to open up about their own experiences and I have had many people say, You have explained a mystery that I have been living with for a long time.

Let me introduce myself. I am a pretty ordinary, down-to-earth Yorkshire person. Born in Leeds, England (still live there now) into a wonderful (but pretty ordinary) family and had a very secure, happy childhood and felt much loved. We were – and still are – a very close family. Nothing really extraordinary to report on my childhood – I was regarded as pretty intelligent (an A/B grade type student) – I was the middle child of three, with two lovely brothers. We fought, like all siblings do, but pretty rarely and we were incredibly close as kids and did lots together. We still do lots together now, albeit we are all a little older and the next generation has now appeared. We have seven kids between us (the average 2.4 children) all now teenagers. We all live in Yorkshire and see a lot of each other.

I am blissfully married to the most wonderful man and have been for nearly twenty five years. We have two lovely children who have done us proud. Our son is at University and our daughter is preparing for her first set of ‘big’ exams at school.

I have worked since I was sixteen and had a pretty successful career in a bank for seventeen years, following which, I left to set up my own business. I have been my own boss now for over fourteen years in the field of equality and inclusion and have had a varied and stimulating career. I have had my fair share of challenges, including riding out the UK recession and adapting the business to meet new needs, but in the main it has been the best decision I ever made and has given me the freedom to do what I really want to do.

Having had a pretty carefree and happy, contented life, the last few years have been probably the most challenging in my life and there have been many occasions when I have been heard to say, Why me? I now realise there was a very important reason why these challenges presented themselves in my path – so I could grow as a person, have a clear vision of where I am going and to lead a rich and fulfilled life.

This is my journey and quest to find my true self and life purpose – and it is told to you as a story. I will be baring my soul because I feel it is important to share this story with as many people as possible to give them hope and excitement for their life ahead. I almost see it as a film with me as the main character and – as with all good films – there is a brilliant cast who have supported (and tested!) me along the way.

I sincerely hope that my story inspires you towards seeking a greater understanding of yourself and gives you a ‘map’ to reflect back on your own journey so far (and what you have learned from it) and some directions for following your own journey of self-discovery.

I am so proud of how I have come through in the face of adversity and the experience has given me courage to face any challenge that life puts my way. I sincerely hope this book helps many people - that is my intention - and if you feel you are going through things in your life that seem almost unbearable right now please know there is always a light at the end of the tunnel. My inner light now shines very big and very brightly.

How this Book works

My journey began with a quite unexpected ‘spiritual’ occurrence. It came as a surprise to me (because I have never been particularly spiritual) and in seeking to find some answers I found myself in this amazing world of discovery where the ‘spiritual’ converged with the ‘science’ time and time again.

I’m a pretty down to earth person so I did question things along the way and found that I was getting scientific proof for a lot of things I had never fully understood and always regarded as a bit ‘out there’.

My husband, Jon, has been at my side throughout. He is about as down-to earth as they come and will not believe anything unless he sees it with his own eyes. There was a time when he did genuinely struggle with the experiences I was having, but as I moved through the journey of discovery and learned more and more about the ‘science’ of the power of the mind, Jon began to understand and even embrace a lot of the things I was learning and experiencing. He began to see how much of these ‘self-help’ tools and techniques were already applied in the business world (they were just diluted a bit with business speak).

He read some of the books I was reading and really began his own journey alongside me. I was still pretty much sticking to the ‘spiritual’ approach because my first experience had been so profound. Jon stuck mainly to the ‘science’ approach and we found a point of convergence that suited us both.

So – this book has turned into the story of two people, with two different perspectives, sharing the same journey. I am hoping this offers you a unique and varied read.

Jon will feature in the book with his own take on things (The View from the Ground) and how he walked slightly behind me to start (watching my back), then alongside me and then found his own path of self-discovery, which ran parallel to mine. Our relationship has certainly gone up many levels by us treading this journey alongside each other. Vivienne

View from the Ground

If you have got this far through the foreword, it is hopefully because you have invested in a book that I believe will truly interest and inspire you in equal measures, rather than you are having a cheeky read in the local book shop.

Let’s get something straight, when Vivienne (or as I like to call her - Viv) talks about me understanding the science, what she means is that I have come at this subject from a very black and white point of view. If I can see it and understand it, then I will feel it. If I can feel it, then I will live it and love it. Sounds strange? I hope as I interject through Viv’s story, this will become a littler clearer.

As Viv has said, I am down–to–earth, or a better expression would be grounded. I like beer (but drink wine); eat Indian food too often; watch rugby league; attend the Leeds Festival every year with our son and am addicted to Facebook.

Viv has explained how I have followed her on this journey. All I would ask is that you read this book with an open mind and an open heart, and I promise you will be really inspired.

I am inspired every day and am proud to be married to Viv. She is my inspiration and I believe you will understand why as you ‘fly’ through the pages - a pun intended - in the spirit (sorry, there’s another one) of the book. We talk every day about the positive influences on our lives and that is a massive shift from only 12 months ago when, if you heard us, you would have thought we had nothing. The fact of the matter is, we had everything, we just were too blinkered to realise it.

This is genuinely a magnificent read. How can I be so sure? I’ve lived and breathed it and I can absolutely say every day is now brilliant. Every day brings something positive and believe me, coming from someone who used to mourn at finishing over half of his glass of wine that is a revelation.

Read on and be inspired or if you are in the local book shop, wander over to the shop assistant, smile and proclaim you would like to invest in this book.

Jon

Acknowledgements

I have so many people to thank for their love and support during the creation of this book. Not only have they been constant supporters and cheerleaders of the book but they have also given me all the love and strength I needed to get through some pretty challenging times before and during the time it was being written.

For his constant love and support I want to thank my husband and soul mate Jon. Not only did you encourage me along the way but you also turned into my co-author and transformed this book into something pretty unique and special with your humorous ‘view from the ground’.

My precious children Ben and Livia who have always helped me to understand what true unconditional love means.

To my mum for being my mum. I am so lucky to have you as my mum and the safe haven of your home and hugs where all my challenges just seemed to melt away.

To my dad for being a great dad. I miss you but I know your parting from this world opened up a whole new world for me.

To my wonderful friends who have all contributed so much to my personal development over the last two years and also became my willing proof readers when the book was completed: Kathy Wood, Jean Garrod, Anj Handa, Amanda Heenan. Thankyou my angels.

To Ryan Askew who came into my life recently and I believe for a very important reason. To give me the courage to write and publish this story and to talk openly about my experiences despite them being a little ‘unusual’! It has been such an honour and blessing to feel I have inspired you with my story.

To Amanda Heenan for the wonderful cover design painted after reading some of the book.

To Steve Ramsden and Caroline Sheerin for reading the completed book and giving me such positive feedback. Your lovely, heartfelt words have helped to propel me forward in getting the book published and out in the public domain.

Finally I would like to thank the person that instigated the biggest and most positive personal shift that I have ever had in my life. He is referred to in this book as the X Man and without him keeping up the momentum of challenge, I would not be in the happiest and healthiest place that I am today.

The Flock

Friends are as companions on a journey, who ought to aid each other to persevere in the road to a happier life.

PYTHAGORAS

Here’s a quick overview of the wonderful characters in my story.

Jon – my husband

Ben – my son

Livia – my daughter

Mum – my mum

Dad – my dad

Kathy – my best mate

Jean – my mentor and guide

Amanda – the purest person I know

Bruce – my older brother

Anj – my friend and business associate

Ryan – the window cleaner

The X Man – a main character in my film who could be seen as the ‘baddy’ but who actually got me started on the path to self-discovery and unbeknownst to him, has kept up the challenge and momentum which has propelled me forward. Thankyou.

Chapter 1 - The Journey Begins

The only journey is the one within

RAINER MARIA RILKE

The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step

LAO TZU

2012 was a challenging year for me – probably the most challenging one I had experienced in my life.

My business was being impacted by the UK recession and we had to downsize in terms of our operations as business was reducing. My personal income was slipping quite dramatically as a result. A key supplier had received some bad press which we had to communicate and manage with our clients.

The X Man was proving to be the most challenging person I had ever worked with in my life. Not only directly – but also his impact on other people, which I had to deal with as they all turned to me.

My self-esteem was being battered beyond all recognition. I was subjected to criticism and sometimes aggression, almost daily, and I was beginning to feel like I was pretty useless at everything.

I was experiencing all the physical signs of extreme stress and anxiety. Tight chest, pounding heart, and constant lump in my throat and at its worst I had a few panic attacks, which are the scariest phenomena to handle.

On top of all these challenges at work, my dad’s health was in serious decline. He was in and out of hospital which was putting an enormous pressure and worry on the family. We were all incredibly concerned for our mum’s health as this was being impacted by the daily stresses of caring for my dad.

Looking back on it now, I realise I was wallowing in self-pity and could not understand why all these ‘bad’ things were happening to me. After all – I was a good person – wasn’t I? I had never done anything bad in my life, I had always tried to be good to people, so why was I being punished with all these bad things in my life? Everything seemed to be spiralling out of control on a downward journey and I was getting pretty close to breaking point.

One week in September, I had experienced a particularly bad time. My dad had been rushed into hospital and we were told to be prepared for the worst. He was dying and the hospital had said that, given his age (he had reached the ripe old age of 85 bless him), he would not be a candidate for any kind of resuscitation if he slipped away. The family were devastated and we drew ourselves in to support each other, particularly mum (who was probably dealing with it better than any of us).

On one particular day that week I had been subject to a ferocious attack from the X Man. I had actually thrown the phone across the floor – I just could not believe how cruel he was being to me given everything that was going on with my dad.

Mum and I visited the hospital that evening and dad was quite lucid. He had made a bit of a recovery and as a family we were all clinging on to any little improvement he made. He kept asking me to talk to the doctors to find out if he was going to be OK. A lovely, kind doctor took me into a private room and reiterated that, whilst dad was making a slight improvement, he had serious heart failure and we still had to be prepared for the worst. He advised that they would not recommend resuscitation if dad’s heart stopped as the procedure could actually do more damage to dad because it is so invasive.

I had to walk out of that room with a smile on my face to go back to my mum and dad with some encouraging words. It is one of the hardest things I have ever had to do – but dad looked so hopeful and expectant I had to lie to him.

On the way home, mum turned to me and said, Now tell me what the doctors really said. to which I just burst into tears.

That night I got home and went to my sanctuary, the bathroom. Ever since my children were babies, this had been the one place where I could just slip away from the realities of the world for a few moments and have a bit of ‘me’ time. I sank into the bath, put my head in my hands and said imploringly;

WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME!!!!!!!!

I was rather shocked and surprised to receive an audible answer. Without even thinking, I entered into a dialogue with this voice and here is how it went.

VOICE: Because you are being tested.

ME: Why am I being tested?

VOICE: Because you have to be strong.

ME: Why do I have to be strong?

VOICE: Because you have an important role.

ME: What is my role? I must say at this point, I did actually think I might have actually tipped over the edge (you know what they say about talking to yourself and getting an answer back!), but the voice was so strong and clear it could not be my imagination and I felt compelled to carry on this ‘conversation’. I also genuinely did not feel like I was thinking up the answers in my head (like when you sometimes give yourself a good talking to). There was also a strong feeling that I was being told something incredibly important and life changing.

VOICE: To help people get on with each other. This didn’t feel like me just being sociable with people and stopping them arguing. This felt like it was a job on a much bigger scale.

ME: But how will I help everyone to get on with each other?

VOICE: Kathy will explain. Kathy is my best buddy - a pretty down to earth Yorkshire person like me.

ME: What about the X Man? – I felt I had to ask this