Hardcore Humor.....Your Phd In Dirty Jokes & Kickass Insults

By Professor Philo T.

This is NOT your average joke book. This collection is proof positive that offensive, disgusting, and obscene taste, and humor, are intimate partners which amuse and delight us against our better judgment and morals, because whether we care to admit it or not, the funniest things in life are the very things which make us feel guilty for laughing. If that's the case be prepared to laugh until you cry.....or vomit. Whichever comes first. Unlike most so called dirty joke books out there where authors concentrate more on quantity than quality in order to reach a desired number of words, and which aren't all that funny, this is quite different. I personally and painstakingly sifted through thousands upon thousands of the most rib shaking, hysterical laffers ever compiled, and weeded out all except for the absolute best of the best. If it didn't have me literally rolling on the floor convulsed in laughter it was discarded. End of story. There's no fillers here. As an added bonus I also included some of the most gonads shattering insults and put-downs ever devised to verbally castrate any antagonist stupid enough to incur your wrath. Remember, one of the great tragedies of life is coming up with that perfect comeback Tuesday morning, which you desperately needed Saturday night. Don't let that happen to you. With this book it won't. You will become a master pundit ready for anything. Now sit back and prepare to be entertained. Oh, just one more thing. I feel compelled to add a final disclaimer here. This book is definitely not for you tree hugging, sanctimonious, p/c, over sensitive types.....though on second thought it may be just what you need to loosen the fuck up a bit and enjoy life more. That being said, it's time for the laughs to begin.....

• Language: English
• Publisher: Professor Philo T.
• Release date: Mar 7, 2014
• ISBN: 9781310988400

Professor Philo T.

Professor Philo T is an alias used by the author mainly because it's more sophisticated and worldly sounding than his given name. Not to mention it eliminates his having to field uncomfortable questions, and enduring long, baleful stares from his co-workers at his real job, many of who aren't lucky enough to be published authors. When not painstakingly counting the many years left until he's eligible to retire from his current career in law enforcement, the author is a longtime studier of the martial arts, the occult, old movies, prolonging death for as long as possible, and anything else he deems as "really cool." The author currently lives in Upstate New York with his drop-dead-gorgeous wife Nicole, and Bailey, the yorkie terrier who saw fit to adopt them as his human parents.

Book preview

HARDCORE HUMOR

Your PHd In Dirty Jokes and Kickass Insults

Professor Philo

Smashwords Edition

Copyright © 2014 Professor Philo

License Notes: This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this ebook with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then you should return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Table of Contents

Introduction

Hardcore Humor

Debilitating Insults And Putdowns

Introduction

First off, I just want to acknowledge you, the reader, for actually taking the time and effort to read this introduction. If you like laughter. I mean long, loud, gut wrenching, holyfuckingshitithinkimgonnapukemyself kind of laughter, this is for you. I've meticuously and painstakingly combed through thousands upon thousands of the greatest adult jokes I ever heard over the decades, weeding out all except the very best of the best. Was all this extra work a laborious, headache inducing, pain in the ass? Hell yeah. Were the end results worth all the added vodka and Advils? No question about it. There's no fillers here, as is often the case with other similiar works. This book is geared to keep your sides aching from the opening letter to the closing period. Other authors may try and stuff in as much crap as they can in the hopes of reaching a desired number of words, and therefore sacrificing quality for quantity. That's not the case here. Nothing was cheapened and diluted. If it didn't have me literally rolling on the floor it was discarded, simple as that. As an added bonus I've also included a collection of some of the most devastating, gonads crunching, insults ever compiled, to be used against a deserving adversary. Insults have always been a favorite staple in our culture for many reasons, the biggest ones being: 1) it gives you the satisfaction of one-upping a deserving adversary, 2) it acts as a huge deterrent against your adversary repeating his offense, 3) It's