Making Death Your Bitch
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About this ebook
As a researcher and practitioner of the occult for over two decades, Professor Philo certainly knows a thing or two about "death." Almost from infancy we have instilled within us an almost overzealous fear of death and dying. We're taught to believe that Death is the ultimate knuckle-dragging bounty hunter, the one who has NEVER failed to bring back whoever he set out for. Since the dawn of time he's yet to lose a battle, which both adds to his considerable menace, and reinforces why most people are so terrified of him. Therefore you have two choices when finally confronted with this ultimate warrior. You can either lose your bowels, and be dragged out from underneath your bed kicking and screaming, which is both undignified, and robs your demise of the tragic gravitas you feel it deserves. Or you can calmly stare him down with the full realization that not only have you met up with this particular foe before, but you've encountered him many, many times over the years, and he's not as big and bad as you've been led to believe. This book will teach the reader how to not only not fear Death, but replace the fear and dread with humor and good cheer. Professor Philo first starts out with numerous examples of some of the most absurd, grotesque, undignified, and side-splittingly hysterical ways that people have departed over the years, proving that even in death there's always someone much worse off than you. You will learn to get the lowdown on what death and the afterlife is like from those who should know best....the dead themselves. The good professor will show you in clear, non-pompous, easy to understand language, some of the absolute best cutting-edge methods and experiments of spirit contact and communication, which will have you communing as well or better than any medium. You will have a clear understanding of what death and the afterlife is like without having to go through the extreme of actually dying to find out. In other words we're going to take all the fear and tragedy out of dying, and make death our BITCH !!
Professor Philo T.
Professor Philo T is an alias used by the author mainly because it's more sophisticated and worldly sounding than his given name. Not to mention it eliminates his having to field uncomfortable questions, and enduring long, baleful stares from his co-workers at his real job, many of who aren't lucky enough to be published authors. When not painstakingly counting the many years left until he's eligible to retire from his current career in law enforcement, the author is a longtime studier of the martial arts, the occult, old movies, prolonging death for as long as possible, and anything else he deems as "really cool." The author currently lives in Upstate New York with his drop-dead-gorgeous wife Nicole, and Bailey, the yorkie terrier who saw fit to adopt them as his human parents.
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