Audiobook8 hours
One and the Same: My Life as an Identical Twin and What I've Learned About Everyone's Struggle to Be Singular
Written by Abigail Pogrebin
Narrated by Justine Eyre
Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
4/5
()
About this audiobook
Writer. Mother. Wife. New Yorker. Abigail Pogrebin is many things, but the one that has defined her most profoundly is "identical twin." Pogrebin's relationship with her sister-both as children, when they were inseparable, and today, when she longs for that uncomplicated intimacy-inspired her to examine the phenomenon of twinship, to learn how other identical pairs regard their doubleness and what experts are learning about how DNA impacts our sense of identity and shapes our lives.
In One and the Same, Pogrebin presents a tapestry of twinship, weaving science reporting and personal memoir with the revelatory stories of other twins, such as two sisters who stopped speaking for three years; football stars Tiki and Ronde Barber, who admit their twinship comes before their marriages; a pair of bawdy, self-proclaimed "twin ambassadors" who have created a media empire around their twinness; and brothers whose shared genetic anomaly wrought unspeakable tragedy. In this stirring account, Pogrebin shows how living identical is both a celebration of sameness and a struggle for singularity that defines us all.
In One and the Same, Pogrebin presents a tapestry of twinship, weaving science reporting and personal memoir with the revelatory stories of other twins, such as two sisters who stopped speaking for three years; football stars Tiki and Ronde Barber, who admit their twinship comes before their marriages; a pair of bawdy, self-proclaimed "twin ambassadors" who have created a media empire around their twinness; and brothers whose shared genetic anomaly wrought unspeakable tragedy. In this stirring account, Pogrebin shows how living identical is both a celebration of sameness and a struggle for singularity that defines us all.
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Reviews for One and the Same
Rating: 4.033333453333333 out of 5 stars
4/5
15 ratings2 reviews
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5"My life as an identical twin and what I've learned about everyone's struggle to be singular": Doesn't that sound like a memoir? Abigail Pogrebin tricked me! But I am okay with it, even though One And The Same is more sociology than memoir. I like sociology, too.Oh, twins are so, so interesting. I love twins! Turns out, everyone else does too! (Except, sometimes, their twins) Pogrebin has written a fascinating book about the inner lives of twins; she interviewed loving pairs, hating pairs, pairs with genetic diseases (dude, SO SAD), and her own family - especially her more private twin, Robin. The relationship of Abigail to Robin - not quite the same as the relationship of Robin to Abigail - is the heart and foundation of the book, though it only occupies perhaps a fourth of the content. I was particularly interested by the examination of marriage among identical twins; the concept that the intimacy of being deeply known is something that twins have had all along, and may not really be seeking in marriage, was a new idea for me. Oddly disturbing too, but it made a lot of sense.I had a strong impression (perhaps she even said so) that Pogrebin was hoping to resolve the somewhat strained relationship with her own twin through the writing of this book - and I was left, at the end, with the same rather sad feeling that came through at the beginning. But still, a lovely book which left me thinking hard about what seems a universal desire for someone who is, if not a twin, is somehow like a twin.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5What is it about twins that fascinate? I used to wish I was a twin myself, imagining a perfect playing partner who would have more in common with me than a mere sibling. In this book, Abigail Pogrebin interviews many twins, from football stars Tiki and Ronde Barber to acquaintances of her own, as well as psychologists and doctors specializing in twin studies, presenting a broad spectrum of the relationships between adult twins and theories regarding raising twins and helping them become fully realized individual adults. Pogrebin investigates a wide range of topics related to twins, from the idealized relationship to the struggle for individuality to medical studies of identical twins with different medical issues (which I found a fascinating and informative regarding the nature/nurture discussion). What fascinated me the most - the world of being a twin - was also the most frustrating in reading. As a twin herself, the author refers to "the Twin Thing" and makes much of the special relationship that twins have. I've known many twins, either together or separately, but having not been a twin myself or having a set of twins in my immediately family, I felt rather thrown into the world of twins in the early part of the book, and it was only in the latter chapters that I felt I had gained my footing somewhat.Throughout it all, Abigail's relationship with her identical twin sister, Robin, informs her understanding of these interviews, but at the same time seems to come to a better understanding of her relationship because of her investigation. She discusses their relationship often, including snippets of her interview with Robin, with their brother David, and with family friends. I was impressed with her ability to describe the loss she feels of the close relationship she once had with Robin without falling into the blame game or becoming a whiny victim. She paints a very honest family portrait without making out anyone as "the bad guy." A fascinating blend of reporting and interviews, psychology and personal experience.