I welcome Mia Moore to the studio for her first show, appropriate being that the Get Over Yourself Northern California studios are located in her house! (SoCal studios are at my mom and dad’s in case you are curious). Mia is seen by many, or at least and perhaps most importantly by Brad, as an ideal relationship partner. Hence we aspire to have her as a recurring guest to talk about healthy relationship dynamics and strategies. In the future, we will zero in on specific topics like show #2’s “Cheerleader Show”, or discuss popular relationship theories (The Four Agreements, Mars and Venus, John Gottman’s work, Kris Gage’s articles on Medium.com). This conversation moved quickly through many topics that will make great centerpiece discussions for future shows. The central theme of the Mia Moore shows was presented, which is that we might want to second-guess our baseline beliefs about relationships. We see so much struggle, stress and dysfunction in romantic partnerships that we become socialized to believe that relationships are mainly about hard work, compromise of beliefs, values, and preferences, frustration, heartache, and extra stress, with glimpses of bliss thrown in now and then. These realities pair with the routine venting and commiserating sessions with the boys at bowling league or the girls at book club.  Mia talks about how life experience, including both positive and negative aspects of past relationships, can frame one’s perspective and stimulate personal growth for more happiness, peace, and fulfillment in future relationships. Mia suggests that those who complain about relationship imperfections are advised to show up at a singles meetup or engage with an Internet dating service to gain a fresh perspective and perhaps experience more gratitude for what they got at home. Mia suggests that the worst mistake parents make is prioritizing kids before the nurturing of a loving partnership. In the age of helicopter parenting in general, kids come to believe they are at the center of the universe, and likely will bring these unhealthy perspectives into future love relationships of their own. Most importantly, Mia has adopted a lifestyle motto of, “don’t sweat the small stuff,” which helps her navigate potentially contentious situations with work, family, friends, and our partnership with great patience and peace. Recall the popular book title and subtitle, “Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff…and it’s all small stuff.” That said, Mia observes that small stuff is relative. If chronic lateness is seen as trivial by one but highly offensive by another, these people might not be poised for a healthy relationship because of such a fundamental difference in values and beliefs. The show is not merely warm fuzzy fun with a kudo kounter. We stay unplugged and authentic without script, notes or agenda. At one point, Mia calls me out for getting “butt hurt” when random interruptions occur (e.g., a GPS navigation voice) while I am busy blabbing away on the important topic of the day. Mia also calls B.S. on my emphasizing the concept of “drawing boundaries” as a relationship strategy. This gets me (and maybe you) to rethink a basic premise: should we really have to draw our boundaries again and again in relationship? Could we instead express our needs and preferences and expect that partners respect our boundaries pretty well? So what about stuff like explosive arguments and emotionally-charged communication? Kris Gage on the Medium says “emotional control/emotional self-stability” is the mandatory top priority for a healthy relationship. Gage argues persuasively that everything else flows from this starting point; otherwise the relationship is doomed. Mia draws a critical distinction between “venting” (about a tough day at work or challenges with family members or friends), and “kicking the dog” with emotionally abusive communication. It seems people often get a free pass here; that they are allowed to figuratively kick the dog, say sorry