Did you know that the #1 longevity factor is not your diet or the quality of your sleep, but the health (or dysfunction) of your long-term romantic relationship? Yes, according to Dr. John Gray, it doesn’t matter how much you’re exercising or how healthy your lifestyle is - if your romantic relationship is a source of stress or unhappiness in your life, then that will inevitably take a toll on your health and affect your longevity. You can trust John knows what he’s talking about, as does happen to be the #1 best-selling relationship author of all time, and of course wrote the iconic bestseller, Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus: The Classic Guide To Understanding The Opposite Sex. He has even more radical insights to share, and some of it might throw you for a second because his ideas are so fresh and alternative. But as you’ll hear, there is always a good explanation and/or scientific fact behind why John says what he does. As he noted during his previous show appearance, culture has changed, society has changed, but we as humans, biologically and hormonally, have remained pretty much the same. This is what usually creates issues between couples - the external factors we all have to deal with because of modern life. Interestingly, John points out that most women lose their attraction to men when they start to open up about their feelings. But wait, aren’t women always saying they want men to be more open and share more? Sure...but what happens with this dynamic is, the more hurt feelings the man shares, the more the woman wants to protect him. It’s not the sharing of emotions that is necessarily bad, it’s the timing of it. John strongly cautions men to not share their feelings when they are feeling emotional because the change of this dynamic - the woman becoming the protector, not the man - is what results in the woman losing her attraction to the man. John says, “part of intimacy is revealing what is inside of you,” so how do you achieve intimacy - how do you share in a way that keeps the balance of your relationship, instead of throwing it way off? It’s simple: men should wait to reveal what’s going on inside of them until after the woman has done this first. Once she has shared, then that’s the appropriate time for the man to open up about what’s been on his mind. John also talks about the importance of the unconscious mind, and not letting it “rule” or “control” us, and then we delve into a discussion about hormones. Did you know that for males, a high sex drive is directly correlated with high (or normal) testosterone levels? And whenever you do something dangerous, or something that gives you a thrill, or even something successfully, testosterone goes up. But what makes testosterone go down? When a man feels like his partner does not appreciate or value him. As John points out, life happens, and when it does, it can really knock you down. And it’s in those moments that couples will behave in a way that will either make or break the relationship. As a man, having a supportive partner who loves, appreciates, and admires you for what you provide/bring to the relationship, is a testosterone booster. But when the man has more needs than the woman, she becomes the man, and her testosterone will go up! The goal is for everyone to have a healthy balance of female and male hormones in their body because an imbalance in hormones will seriously affect your relationship. When a woman starts to slide into the “male” role in the relationship, her female hormones decrease as her male hormones increase, which changes her behavior: women get more stressed, feel more dissatisfied, and find it difficult to express appreciation, love, and acceptance for their partners. They will also start to project all their frustrations onto their partner because when they are testosterone dominant, this indicates that they are stuck in a place of doing things that cannot bring inner satisfaction. Inner fulfillment for women comes from being in