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Dad, You're Not Funny and other Poems: An Alphabet of Poems
Dad, You're Not Funny and other Poems: An Alphabet of Poems
Dad, You're Not Funny and other Poems: An Alphabet of Poems
Ebook180 pages28 minutes

Dad, You're Not Funny and other Poems: An Alphabet of Poems

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Have you ever formed a secret club with friends? Or witnessed the flight of a cow?
Have you ever heard a duck whistle? You haven't? Then read this book now.

As always, Steve Turner's poems present a fresh and quirky view on life. Many of the poems in this collection are about childhood: school and holidays, dreams and monsters, food, friends...

This collection of over seventy poems will entertain and interest children both in the classroom and at home. The themes and ideas are thought-provoking as well as witty and fun, and the entertaining cartoons reflect the mood of the poems.

Steve Turner is the award-winning author of the best-selling poetry collection The Day I Fell Down the Toilet.

LanguageEnglish
Release dateMay 17, 2024
ISBN9781915748126
Dad, You're Not Funny and other Poems: An Alphabet of Poems
Author

Steve Turner

Steve Turnerbegan his journalistic career as Features Editor of the British rock monthly Beat Instrumental . He has written many music biographies, including Conversations with Eric Clapton , Rattle and Hum (U2), and A Hard Day's Write (the Beatles).

Read more from Steve Turner

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    Book preview

    Dad, You're Not Funny and other Poems - Steve Turner

    Other books by Steve Turner:

    The Day I Fell Down the Toilet and Other Poems

    Don’t Take Your Elephant to School: An Alphabet of Poems

    Ten Silly Santas and Other Christmas Poems

    For Paul Crankshaw,

    my companion on so many

    childhood escapades

    Contents

    Introduction

    FAMILY AND FRIENDS

    The Best Dad

    Dad, You’re Not Funny

    Cranky, Scotty, Mooey and Me

    Sue Was Two

    Ten things Mums Never Say

    When Grandad Comes to Stay

    Kisses

    Shopping with Mum

    Best Friends

    FUN AND GAMES

    The Flying Wheel

    Pocket Money

    Mud

    Digging a Hole

    Travel Game

    The Monarch

    Knocking on Doors

    Countdown

    The Fair

    Tread on a Crack and You Marry a Rat…

    Alphabet

    You’re It!

    ROADS AND PLACES

    Secrets

    Haunted House

    In Our Garden

    Jubilee Road

    Heaven

    Cathedral

    LADIES AND GENTLEMEN

    The Queen of May

    Rag and Bone Man

    Cowboy

    The Teacher’s Gift

    Snogging

    Teddy Boy

    Stinker

    Miss Hart

    Bobby

    NEWS AND WEATHER

    Whether the Weather

    Christmas

    New Year’s Resolution

    It’s Fun to Have a Fever

    Fire!

    PC Buttle

    In My Day

    Get Off

    New Shoes

    December 19th

    Birth

    BODY AND SPIRIT

    Who Am I?

    The Skull

    Hair and Teeth and Face and Hands

    Gingerbread Man

    Food

    Elbows

    With My Hands

    Ghost Story

    Ode to a Nose

    Backwards

    ANIMALS AND INSECTS

    The Spider’s Excuse

    Miss Muffett

    Hey Diddle Diddle

    Hickory Digital Clock

    Cat

    Limerick

    A Dog Called Nothing

    THOUGHTS AND DREAMS

    What Did You Want to Be When You Grew up?

    That Little Word

    The Wheel

    Why Are You Late for School?

    I Want to Be

    The Future

    Introduction

    Welcome to my book of poetry. I hope that you’ll enjoy it. The title comes from something my son, Nathan, says when I make jokes – especially when I try to make him laugh in front of his friends, and even more especially if I try to make his friends laugh in front of him.

    The first question I get asked when I read my work in schools is – Where do you get your ideas from? So let me explain how I came to write Dad, You’re Not Funny.

    A lot of the poems are about when I was young. I wrote them because even though much has changed since then

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