The Chosen Path: Walking toward beauty and joy amidst ashes and mourning

By Erica Skattebo

Experiencing years of infertility and heartbreaking loss, Erica walked a path of ashes, mourning, and heaviness. Yet as she studied the Bible, God slowly began illuminating her path forward. With a heart to reach those who suffer silently, Erica weaves her unique personal journey into a Bible study of women who faced similar challenges. With a faith-filled perspective, this book will encourage women experiencing detours and obstacles to walking toward beauty, joy, and praise.

To give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he might be glorified.

--Isaiah 61:3b

• Language: English
• Publisher: Covenant Books, Inc.
• Release date: Jan 16, 2024
• ISBN: 9798886449945

Book preview

Table of Contents

Title

Copyright

Acknowledgments

Introduction

The Chosen Path

Chapter 1

Faith

We Choose Faith

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Thank You

Chapter 4

To Our Unborn Child

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Unfailing Love

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

The Package

Epilogue

About the Author

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The Chosen Path

Walking toward beauty and joy amidst ashes and mourning

Erica Skattebo

ISBN 979-8-88644-993-8 (Paperback)

ISBN 979-8-88644-994-5 (Digital)

Copyright © 2023 Erica Skattebo

All rights reserved

First Edition

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods without the prior written permission of the publisher. For permission requests, solicit the publisher via the address below.

Covenant Books

11661 Hwy 707

Murrells Inlet, SC 29576

www.covenantbooks.com

To family and friends who have shared in these experiences,

it has been a great encouragement

to walk this path together—

sharing sorrows and joys,

victories and defeats, laughter, and tears.

You are an important part of my life

and to the inception of this book.

To my husband, James, thank you for

endless encouragement and love.

In our darkest days you continue to

point me to the Light of the World.

To those who regularly checked on me

and the progress of this book,

shared your expertise in the behind-the-scenes details,

and prayed about it, even once, thank you.

In memory of Evan James Skattebo

loved and longed for stillborn July 1, 2005

and

in celebration of God's answered prayers

Eliana Michelle Skattebo and Landon James Skattebo

our forever daughter and son

Acknowledgments

James, you know and see the real me, and yet you still love me. That's pretty amazing and sounds much like God's love—unconditional. We've wept and grieved together. We've laughed and loved together. We've walked the path of childlessness and adoption together. We've grown together through all of it. Thank you for being you—my high school sweetheart, my husband, and my friend. You are truly the love of my life, and growing old with you is a gift.

Eliana and Landon, you are direct answers to prayer. God knew we needed each other before the world began, and I am blessed to be your mom. Never be ashamed to tell your story; for in it is God's redeeming love, grace, and providence. Never hesitate to trust God as He continues to write your story. Never be afraid to pursue a dream no matter how old you are. And never ever doubt that you are loved.

Actions speak louder than words, but Mom and Dad, your words and your actions are identical. Your unwavering love for God, your faithful service to God and others, and your uninhibited enthusiasm for family speak volumes. Your constant encouragement and consistent prayers for me during this manuscript-writing process kept me afloat amid the days of doubt and discouragement. Thank you.

Jessamy and Greg, I may be the oldest (and the shortest), but you teach me much about life and how to live it well. I look up to you in more ways than just physically. We may not gush our big feelings out to one another, but there's no doubt we have one another's backs. Our sibling trio is my favorite.

Thank you, first moms, for choosing life and choosing me, for without making those two choices, I would not have the overwhelming blessing of being a mom. Thank you for proving that love multiplies and is not limited to bloodlines.

Manuscript cheerleaders, proofreaders, and motivators are so important. Kristy H., Julie L., Sandra H., Kerry J., Dawn L., Maria R., Stacey B., Janet D., Jill D., Sherry R., Teresa M., you so willingly offered constructive criticism and enthusiastic encouragement throughout this process. A few of you even randomly checked on me when things were quiet. You have no idea how much that meant.

There are not enough words or pages to express gratefulness to all my friends. You faithfully prayed for my family and me. You empathetically wept with me. You voluntarily walked this path with me. You expectantly hoped with me. You excitedly celebrated with me. God sent your heartfelt words, silent support, and expressions of encouragement at just the right time. Your friendship is treasured and appreciated.

Mary Greenwood, Alyse Morotti, Lee Blanton Carden, Jo Ann Welch, Judge Levins, Judge Tesche, and other members of our adoption legal team, you handled the largest and smallest of details with ease, expertise, excellence, and encouragement. You are part of my family's story, and I am forever grateful.

I'll never forget the phone call to announce my manuscript had been accepted for publication! As a novice to the publishing world, there were days of doubt, hesitation, overwhelming details, and unending questions, but the staff of Covenant Books exhibited patience, understanding, skillful knowledge, and a genuine interest in me. Thank you!

Those who read this book, I pray that the words contained in it will encourage you, challenge you, and help you in your journey of longing or loss. While our stories may have threads of similarities, God has chosen a unique path for you. As long as you walk hand in hand with Him, you will never be alone.

Introduction

We were high school sweethearts. On August 16, 1991, the two of us became one, and God's grace allowed us to celebrate our thirty-first wedding anniversary in 2022! In the beginning, we had our lives all mapped out. It was supposed to be an easy road. We would get married, have kids a few years down the road, buy a house and a car, and maybe even own a pet or two. You know, the perfect-life-and-white-picket-fence scenario. Little did we know that God's plans differed so much from ours.

As we entered our third year of marriage, we decided to expand our family. We began looking at baby things—bedding, outfits, cribs, strollers, etc., you name it; we probably looked at it! The nursery was painted, curtains were made, and a few things were even purchased and set aside for our new addition. We were setting up house. That was our problem—we decided and we planned. God decided otherwise.

After several years of being unsuccessful at having a baby on our own, we began to explore some viable options—medical treatments, adoption, herbal